Chapter 12
We step from the portal into a world of blue-green. The Alku silently scan the surroundings. I can almost feel their uncertainty. Part of me longs to connect by summoning to reassure each one, but to do so would be an invasion of privacy. They need to sort out their feelings about coming here, and I don’t want to intrude.
“The lab is only a short walk from here,” Dad says. “After that, we’ll meet with Morris and Sadler to discuss how the portal to Earth is coming along.”
“I want to see my son,” Zarah says in a clipped tone.
My attention shoots to her. I can understand her desire, but Javen is in a terrible state right now. “Are you sure that’s the best idea right away?”
Vihann steps forward. “Zarah and I both agree that it’s not. But we must go for our sakes. My wife needs to see him alive.”
I stand, locked in place. My vision hazes with images of Javen frozen in time on the battlefield, ready to kill me and anyone who got in his way. I don’t want his mother to see him like this. But I suppose this is how Javen saw Zarah all these years—a mother that was right there and yet out of reach a world away.
I glance to Dad and nod.
“I’ll take the rest of you to the lab while Cassi escorts Vihann and Zarah to Javen’s location.” He looks to Javen’s parents and warmly says, “When you’re done visiting your son, please join us. You can see some of the work we’ve been doing and let us know if you have any additional ideas on how the Starfire can be utilized safely.”
Max gives me a small smile. Good luck, he mouths.
I return his expression. “Thanks.”
“He’s this way,” I say to Zarah and Vihann. “And I hate to say this, but I think you should avoid touching him, just in case your Starfire wakes him.”
A small line forms between Zarah’s eyebrows. “Thank you,” she says, her voice breathy.
We silently make our way out of the field. It’s not too long before I spot the guard standing at attention in front of Javen’s hut. A lump rises in my throat. I try to swallow the emotion back, but it’s as if each time I try, the knot returns.
Zarah breaks into a sprint and passes me.
She passes the guard, who eyes me but allows her to pass. She then throws open the door and disappears inside.
As I enter, I find her kneeling before Javen with her hands to her eyes. A sob escapes her mouth, and the whole scene is the end of me.
Tears burst from my eyes, and I lower myself to her side. I place an arm around her shoulders, and the second I do, our minds connect. Her grief flows through my body and melts into mine. I clench my teeth and allow the emotions to consume me so I can take the pain from her. But instead of weakening and drowning me, the connection brings our minds to a place of balance. My body strangely calms.
Slowly I open my eyes to her. Vihann is at Zarah’s other side, taking in the state of his son.
“You are the key, Cassi,” Zarah whispers. “But you will need to discover the full power of the Starfire to heal us all.”
“How am I supposed to do that?” I ask. “I feel the Starfire inside of me, but it’s not telling me what to do.”
Vihann pulls his focus from his son to me. “It will.”
“How can you be so sure?” I ask.
Javen’s father stands. “You simply have to allow the crystals to do what they are supposed to do. Follow your heart, and the Starfire will lead you to what’s right.”
“Thank you for allowing us to see Javen.” Zarah releases a long breath. Her lips stretch into a weak smile. Then she takes Vihann’s hand and rises. “We will see you at the lab.”
“That’s it?” I ask.
“There’s nothing more I can do that will repair this,” she says, “other than getting to work. This is the best way I can help Javen and the others.”
I wish more than anything that I could fix the situation right now—for them. For me. Zarah steals one more glance at Javen, and then she and Vihann walk toward the lab and out of sight.
The Starfire stirs inside of me when I return my focus to Javen. He is still so beautiful. The way his dark hair curls on his forehead, the way the light touches his caramel skin. Even in stasis, the toned muscles of his chest press against his shirt. But it is the lyrical cadence of his voice and the wondrous love and kindness of his heart I miss most.
A few feet away from the door, the guard stands watch. That won’t do. “I need some time alone with Javen.”
“My orders are to stay here,” he says.
“I understand. But I’m the one who put Javen in this state. I’ll re-sedate him if something goes wrong.”
The guard doesn’t move.
I throw my hand to my hip and march through the doorway. “Look, I can pair my Connect with yours.” I tap the surface and bring up the pairing function. “If something goes wrong, I’ll alert you immediately.”
The guard tightens his jaw.
I feel a scowl line appear between my brows in reply. “Listen. My father and I are the ones who are going to get you home. If you want that to happen, I need you to do what I’m telling you.”
His eyes widen, and immediately, my stomach sinks with guilt. “Please?” I whisper as a last-ditch plea.
He relaxes slightly and then taps his Connect. He touches his device to mine, and the two vibrate for a second.
“You don’t have to go far. I just need some privacy,” I say.
The guard nods as he trudges off. I watch as he moves out of sight. Then, I step back inside the hut and shut the door. Crystals speckling the walls illuminate slightly, brightening the space. I sit next to Javen and cross my legs while studying his face.
I move from his closed eyes to his lips. Maybe I’m imagining it, but the anger has softened. There’s still tension in his mouth and jaw, but he appears much more peaceful than when I had last seen him.
A longing to caress each beautiful feature on his face moves through me. But I have no idea whether doing so is safe. Skin-on-skin contact could release him before it’s safe to do so.
Despite the still-present ache for him, the Starfire keeps my emotions in check, my mind clear. I let the thoughts and questions just be instead of focusing too strongly on any one of them.
As I do this, the cyan world fades and takes me to somewhere new. Gone are the grass and sky, and I find myself in stark grayish surroundings, save for a wispy cyan presence, almost like bits of smoke. I glance around, searching for whoever is with me, but there’s no one. At least, not anyone I can see.
“Hello?” My voice echoes slightly into the nothing, and the smoky wisps vibrate and dance with the sound.
No one answers. But an intensifying presence draws in closer to me. Fear grinds in my stomach. I know that someone or something is here.
“Please show yourself,” I plead.
The glowing wisps begin to vibrate and move around the space more quickly. I stand in awe as they zip around my body. The rush of air created by their motion blows at my hair like a gentle breeze. They continue to circle me as my nerves begin to calm. I close my eyes and focus on just breathing. Still, slight nervousness shudders in my chest as the air enters my lungs. My head grows light, and electricity fills my body. The force collapses me to the ground.
Everything goes dark.
My eyelids flick open. Across from me is a woman with cyan skin and long hair blowing in a breeze I can’t feel. No, not a woman . . . more like a ghost, since I can see right through her.
“Am I dead?” I ask. Being dead is the only thing that makes sense to me right now, if I’m seeing ghosts.
The woman’s lips curve into a sweet smile, and her form suddenly goes from transparent to solid. “No, you are not dead.”
I scoot away from the being a few inches. “Then what is this? And where did Javen go?” My stomach flutters wildly as the being fades to partial transparency again.
She tips her head to the side and squints for a moment as if in thought. “I’m fright
ening you. Why? You should be feeling calm right now.”
Calm? No, I don’t feel calm. I run shaking fingers through my hair. “Because I have no idea what you are. I’m just getting used to the idea of aliens being a real thing, and now this? People who are transparent?” My eyes round wider with growing fear. “Is that what you are? Another kind of alien?”
Several wisps of light come from nowhere and zip around her body. “In a way . . . but not exactly.” She pinches her lips together. “Maybe it is my form that is causing you so much difficulty.”
The light reverses from her and twists around my body. I gasp, but as soon as I do, the lights return to the woman. She raises her hand in the air, and her body transforms.
Instead of a woman, a tall, dark-haired man now stands before me. I step back, my eyes widening even further. But then I halt and tilt my head. I know who this is—my grandfather. The version I see in front of me is younger than the images I’ve seen. I would guess this man here is in his late forties to early fifties. Closer to Dad’s age. But it’s my grandfather . . . I know it. His face is kind and gentle, but all of that could be a trick. Something to make me feel safe and trusting.
“Are you reading my mind? Pulling my memories?” The questions come out in a screech. I whip my head right and left, looking for a way to leave. But there’s nothing because we are nowhere.
“Please, calm down,” the man who looks like my grandfather says.
“Calm down?” I return my attention to him. “Do you know all the crazy things that have happened to me over the past few days?”
He doesn’t offer a reply.
“Well, we won’t even talk about how I thought that my dad was dead for the last month . . . because apparently he was just stuck in a third dimension on the planet. But how about finding out that I’m part alien? That’s pretty big. And then, on top of all that, the boy I love is frenzied with rage and may have killed people. And if that weren’t enough, I’ve now become some kind of ‘Protector’ of a super powerful crystal, one that could destroy whole races of people.” The last words puff out due to my lack of breath. I suck in quick pants like I’m suffocating. Maybe I am.
The being’s face droops with sadness. “I can see this is extremely difficult for you, and that is understandable.”
“You think?” I wrap my arms across my chest and squeeze smaller into myself. Maybe if I squeeze tightly enough, I can disappear.
My legs shake, and I decide to sit on the ground. Then I gather my legs up to my chin and wrap my arms around my knees. But the tears stinging the back of my eyes don’t fall. So, I hide my face between my knees and my body and try to slow my breathing.
I stay there for a long time, and the man doesn’t speak or encourage me in any way to move. But even without glancing up, I sense him lowering himself to the ground and sitting only a few feet from me.
Eventually, I look up. “What are you?”
He smiles in a kind, grandfatherly sort of way. “I am the Starfire.”
Chapter 13
“What do you mean that you are the Starfire? The Starfire is a crystal.” I look my grandfather up and down—or the being who has taken on the shape of him. He’s dressed in a casual pair of tan slacks and a button-up shirt. “And you are not a crystal.”
He sighs, then regards me silently.
“Answer me!”
He twists his lips the slightest amount. Anticipation and anger bubble in my chest.
“The process is quite complicated, and I’ve not explained it in a very long time,” he says.
I stomp my foot. “I don’t care if it has been a very long time. Hundreds of thousands of lives—no, millions—are at stake here. An all-out war between two planets is about to begin, if it hasn’t already. If we’re going about this Starfire thing all wrong, I need to know, and now! I’m the Protector, and I need to do something about it.”
The Starfire being who looks like my grandfather lets out another long sigh. “You are so young . . .”
“You chose me!” I throw my hands into the air with a groan.
“You are right. I did choose you. But your age and inexperience? I would not choose unless it was absolutely necessary.”
At the being’s words, heat rakes up my neck. I am acting childish, but how is one supposed to act in this type of situation?
“You are obviously very agitated. This is not my intent.”
Several light wisps appear, racing through the air and circling my body. I want to yell at the being again, but as the smoky illuminations surround me, my tension dissolves.
I drop my hands to my side and breathe in deeply, allowing the calm to settle my pulse. My mind slows.
My grandfather waves his hand in the air, and two fluffy blue chairs appear. A whirlwind of memories enters my mind at the sight. As a child, I remember throwing myself into these very chairs at my grandmother’s house. I would munch on cookies she made and read stories for hours.
“Those are from my memory,” I whisper, the cookie’s flavor on my tongue.
“Not only yours but Kieran’s, your grandfather’s. He enjoyed many a day in those chairs talking with your grandmother about many wonderful topics.”
“What should I call you?” I ask.
The being smiles. “How about Kieran . . . since you would have never called your grandfather that.”
I nod and a thought comes to the forefront of my mind. “Did Grandma know who he was, that he was Alku?”
“No,” he says. “As far as Kieran knew, she never even suspected that he was anything other than human. The only person he ever revealed himself to was your mother. And as you know, that was only on his deathbed. He knew your grandmother was not ready for the information. She never was. So, he kept the secret until his last moments.”
Sadness seeps into my too-tight chest. Grandma died a few years back, and she had no idea her husband and daughter . . . and granddaughter were so different. But then I’m not sure she wanted to know. Emotions from grandfather's memories of her flood my mind. She was always happy just the way she was. At least, that’s how I saw her.
Grandma’s crinkly, round face and cherry-red hair, which she dyed until the end, vanish from my mind like one of those random light wisps still floating in the space around us.
Compelled by the memories, I walk to the chair and lower myself into the cushy seat. The give is exactly as I remember, and I lean back and close my eyes, grazing over the velvety fabric with my fingers. “Please tell me what you are. I think everyone I love depends on me knowing.”
I open my lids, and Kieran sits in the chair across from me, crossing one leg over the other. I’ve seen my real grandfather in a few video feeds, not that he was ever in many. The mannerisms and body language of this being are exactly like the real man’s.
“The Starfire was created thousands of years ago,” he says.
“Created?”
He steeples his two pointer fingers together in his lap. “The process was simple, involving minimal, specific functions, and the powers . . . so to speak . . . could be safely operated for those functions. The abilities were useful. But as time went on, new processes were experimented with. When the creators passed on, most Alku eventually forgot about us and we lay dormant.”
He thinks for a moment. “You humans have something similar that I’ve pulled from your memories and experiences.”
I cross my arms over my chest. I want to understand, but this thing already seems to know so much about me and can even pull memories from my mind. What if everything the Starfire says is a manipulation?
“My dear.” He leans forward, and his face softens with compassion. “You will need to trust me. You have very few options other than to do so. I am not manipulating you.”
“Are you reading my mind now?” I level a challenging gaze his way and don’t let go.
“We are connected, just as when you summon the Alku. It is the same principle. I will not harm you, and I will not take anything from you.”
>
My chest tightens as the nothing space around us suddenly becomes a copy of my grandparents’ house. A red brick fireplace appears to the chair’s left, and even a plate of grandma’s cookies rests to my side on a table. Something about the new environment and how I have connected to the Alku’s minds with no ill intent sets me at ease. I still know in my head the room is fake, and that this being could be tricking me. But this being could also be telling the truth. I don’t have a lot of viable choices here. And it’s better for me to find out some information that could be true than nothing at all.
Kieran gestures to the plate piled high with chocolate chip cookies. These were always my favorite. Mom liked her oatmeal raisin, but I never cared much for those. I pick up the oversized cookie and take a nibble. The flavors of butter, chocolate, and sugar tingle across taste buds, and I close my eyes as if the tastes were bites of heaven. There always was something about grandma’s cookies I could never quite replicate, even though we had the recipe.
The being chuckles. “The taste of foods you love is always better in your memory. And since these cookies were pulled directly from there, you are not going to get any better.”
“Grandma made a good cookie.” I scarf the first one down and eat a second nearly as fast. The treat tastes as good as the first, and I have a feeling that if I were to down the entire plate, they would each be just as good. I guess there really is an advantage to basically consuming a memory.
“Are you feeling more comfortable?” he asks.
“Probably as comfortable as I’m going to get.” I dust the crumbs from my hand and lick off a smear of chocolate from my pinky. But in doing so, I spot my mom’s ring on my finger, and the sight of it returns me to reality . . . whatever that is. Because I’m not so sure anymore.
“You were telling me that the Starfire is similar to something familiar to me.”
“Yes. You have something called artificial intelligence—”
I lean forward in surprise. “Like a bot? The Starfire is a bot?”
Kieran stops speaking and furrows his eyebrows a fraction in frustration. “As I said, you are so young . . .”
The Starfire Wars: The Complete Series Page 42