by Ann, Bry
She turns in her wheelchair to leave and I panic, pulling the only card I can possibly think of.
“Mom would be crushed if we drifted apart, Evie Parker.”
Evie freezes. “Five minutes. That’s all.”
“That’s all I need, little sis.”
She huffs, but does turn around and meet my eyes.
“What?” she snaps, not looking me in the eyes to hide how I hurt her.
“Do you remember when I fell playing with you and broke both of my arms?”
Evie’s eyes snap up. This is clearly not the approach she was expecting. I try to look past Evie’s hollow cheeks to find my sister somewhere in her empty eyes.
“Yes,” she whispers.
“Do you remember what you told me?”
Evie doesn’t respond with words. Her throat bobs with a swallow as tears spill down her cheeks.
“You were so little…” I smile softly at the memory. “But you leaned over me with the biggest blue eyes and wild blonde hair as I writhed in pain.”
I laugh.
“You told me if I died you’d never smile again. Then you sobbed out some version of my name through your lisp.”
I take Evie’s hand with a gentle but firm grip.
“That’s what I feel like every second I watch you disappear before my eyes. I love you more than you could ever know, but you know I'm an asshole. I didn’t mean a word I said, Evie. Every second I’ve spent with you in my life has been a blessing.”
“You don’t mean that.” She curls into herself. She looks so fucking small, so fucking fragile.
I let her hand go. “I mean every word, Evie. I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you.”
My breath hitches.
“Please forgive me. Please get better. Fuck, sis.”
I try to wipe my tears before she sees them, but of course Evie doesn’t miss anything I don’t want her to see.
“Don’t cry. Nothing’s gonna happen to me,” she whispers.
“How can you say that? You won’t do what they say. If you won’t listen to professionals when you have 24/7 care, how the hell will I keep you alive in the real world?”
“I eat,” she mutters. “I won’t die.”
“I'm not gonna fight with you. I love you. Please try, Evie.”
* * *
Ring! Ring! Ring!
I glance down at my caller ID and curse. Fuck, it’s Brad. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
Technically, he has a slighter higher status at the bureau than Collin because his unit is more powerful. Shit. Am I gonna lie to him, too?
Shit!
I push open the doors to Essie’s treatment center, trying to shove my talk with Evie yesterday from my mind. I slide my phone over my ear and hit the green button.
“Landon speaking.”
“Landon, it’s Brad. How are you?”
Cool, let’s not act like we’ve been out together. Gotten plastered together. That I’ve seen you pick up random blondes at bars. Cool, cool…
“I'm doing well. How are you?” Lie.
“Good. I wanted to check in and see how things were coming with Essie Taylor. We have a lot riding on her. I'm more than sympathetic to her situation, but if you can’t get something out of her, we need to try other methods. There are so many lives riding on this.”
Thinking on the fly, I push Essie’s door open. Her green eyes immediately find mine… and I'm frozen.
I think she knows I'm talking to an agent, too, ‘cause her pretty eyes fill with panic.
“I understand,” I murmur, guilt filling me already. “I'm with her now. Can I call you as soon as I'm out?”
Brad groans, but reluctantly agrees. “Right after. You’re running out of time, Landon. Be careful. Just be careful, man.”
Click.
What the hell does that mean? I stare at my phone for a solid minute, confused. Be careful of what?
“Did you tell?” Essie asks urgently with a touch of venom in her voice, as is her way.
I bite my lip. “Not yet. Essie…”
Her eyes fade.
“Okay, we’ll drop it for now. How are you today?”
I take a seat in my usual chair. She seems oddly… nervous, fidgeting and all.
“What’s going on?” I ask softly.
“I suppose I have to thank you,” she blurts angrily.
“What for?” I lean back and smirk a bit at her tone.
“Taking me outside,” she spits through clenched teeth.
“You liked it, huh, angel?”
She turns to me then, eyes flashing.
“Do not call me an angel! You don’t know what kind of devil I am!”
She’s trembling all over, so I lean forward a bit to… do nothing. She wouldn’t want me touching her.
“Why don’t you tell me?”
“Don’t. Just don’t.”
“Tell me,” I whisper.
“I’d rather you just fuck me than… this.”
She waves her hands through the air a bit frantically, trying to hide the pain in her eyes I see all too clearly.
“I would never fuck you, Essie,” I whisper, then jolt a bit, wincing.
She laughs. Laughs. Like a full belly laugh.
“Wow, harsh.”
My eyes dance. “You know what I meant.”
“Yeah, I heard you. You’d never fuck me. Never, ever.”
“I'm uncomfortable,” I laugh. “I have no clue what to say here.”
A whisper of a smile graces her still-healing lips.
“The big FBI agent is speechless.”
“Completely.”
Her smile dies. “Why do you bother with me?”
So many reasons. Some professional… some not.
“I don’t think of you as a bother. The opposite, in fact. I like talking to you.”
“You’re an idiot.”
She curls on her side, facing away from me.
“Do you talk to anyone else, Essie?”
She freezes.
“Fuck you.”
“Let’s go outside again.”
“What part of fuck you don’t you…” Her fists uncurl. “You’d take me out again, after last time?”
Her voice is so quiet I barely hear her.
“Of course! My honor.”
She scoffs. I ignore it and come to her bedside.
“Come on, E. Sunshine time.”
She takes my hand, reluctantly, and lets me help her out the door. I kind of hoped she’d be a bit stronger today, but she seems just as breakable and heartbreakingly thin as the last time I saw her.
Six steps in, her legs give out. I tighten my hold on her to make sure she doesn’t fall. Her gaze snaps to me then, confused and angry.
“You’re good,” I whisper, sliding the door open.
I all but carry her to the oak tree about a hundred feet from her door. I gently set her down in the grass and take a seat next to her. Propping myself forward on my elbows, I glance over at her. Her jaw is gritted tight, her stringy black hair blowing in the wind. Her entire body is locked up, trying to hold herself together.
“You can let go, Essie. It’s just us out here,” I murmur.
Her jaw ticks. “No.”
“Essie…” I turn fully toward her as the wind blows harder. Essie stays still, staring intently at the tree ahead.
“I'm fine. I want to go…” Her words lodge in her throat.
“Go where?”
“Where are my parents?” she whispers.
I sigh. “Do you want to know?”
She nods. Fuck, I don’t want to go through this with her.
“Your parents visited you in the hospital. Here once, too.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, they-they’re struggling, Essie.”
I don’t know how much to tell her. Her mom is struggling a lot since finding out. She’s angry, confused, lost, sad. She has no clue what the hell to do. Shiloh and Dean, from Brad’s unit, are working with her. Her dad, on the
other hand, he’s been weirdly PC.
Essie shrugs. “They’re safe, at least.”
I sit up straighter, literally biting on my tongue to keep from shooting questions at her. Her name switch from Essie to Tammy is my most prominent question, but I can’t ask that. Not yet. So biting back my tongue it is.
“Were they not safe?”
She stiffens. Feigning casualty, she picks pieces of grass off the ground and starts to rip them apart without saying anything. Gently, I place my hand on her forearm.
“Essie?”
“He threatened her.”
“Who, Essie? Tell me who.”
Her mouth opens to tell me and she starts to shake.
“You’re safe, Essie.”
“Landon.” Her wide, terrified eyes meet mine. She’s so damn scared.
“Come here,” I whisper.
She faceplants into my chest and holds me like we’re lost at sea. I stroke her hair back once.
“It’s okay, Essie. You can go.”
She holds me just the slightest bit tighter and then her grip goes slack. She lies back and starts muttering to herself. This time, I don’t listen in. I can’t. I let her lie in the grass, outside, and enjoy her self-made safe place. While she mutters and watches the wind blow in the trees, I watch her. I suddenly know what Brad meant by be careful.
I'm getting attached. No, not attached. Invested.
Really invested. I glance over at her again.
“Sorry, Essie Taylor, but I gotta tell them the truth now. It’s time, baby doll.”
Tomorrow, it’s time to tell my team what I know about the mysterious, lost woman beside me.
Chapter Fifteen
Landon
Ring! Ring! Ring!
Go the hell away. It’s two o’clock in the morning and this has been a long week.
Ring! Ring! Ring!
Ugh! I roll over and grab my cell phone from the dresser.
“Hello?” I answer in a groggy voice.
“Hello, this is Carla from Lakewood Hospital. Can I speak with Landon Parker, please?”
I'm suddenly wide awake. “Speaking,” I breathe.
“You were listed as the emergency contact for Essie Taylor.”
My doing.
“Yes?”
“We need you to come to the hospital as soon as possible.”
I'm already up out of bed, yanking whatever pants I have on the floor up my legs.
“Is she okay?”
“We just need you to get here. Go to the front desk and they’ll direct you where to go.”
“Carla—”
She hung up. Fuck!
I throw on whatever other clothes I see before flying out the door. I'm not sure I even lock my front door as I run out into the night.
“Kyle,” I scream frantically over the Bluetooth in my car.
“Landon, what’s going on?”
You wouldn’t even know it’s 2 a.m. Kyle sounds alert and ready for anything, which I need right now.
“Meet me at Lakewood.”
I'm going way past the speed limit, but I can’t think straight. What’s wrong with Essie?
“Essie or Evie?”
My thoughts halt. “Essie.”
Click. I hang up and slam on the gas. My heart pounds harder the closer I get. What’s wrong with Essie? That woman doesn’t need anything else wrong in her life. My chest hurts. It feels tight.
Tell me she’s alive. She can’t die before she’s had a chance to live again. She just… can’t. The world needs her smartass mouth and cynical nature.
I pull up to the hospital, not giving a fuck about my parking job, and sprint through the front doors.
“Agent Landon Parker. I'm here to see Essie Taylor.”
“Follow me, agent.”
A man with a stethoscope comes around the corner and gestures for me to follow with a grim look on his face. I don’t waste a second following him to a messy, paper-filled office.
“What happened?” I ask immediately.
The old man sighs. “Ms. Taylor attempted to commit suicide last night.”
What? What???
“What? No. I-I was with her yesterday.”
“I'm sorry, Agent Parker. Truly. If it’s any consolation, it looks like she’ll be okay. Her wrists will be scarred, but there doesn’t seem to be any permanent damage.”
“She cut her wrists?” I whisper, something akin to heartbreak lacing my voice. Something not professional, at the minimum.
“Yes, sir,” the doctor whispers back, “she did.”
“I see,” I whisper, pain seeping into every pore and fiber of my being.
Is it because I pushed her too far? Is this on me? I should have told my team the second she started talking. Fuck, why didn’t I?
“Sir, she wrote a letter.”
My head snaps up. “She did what? Who’s it addressed to?” I ask immediately.
“You, sir. She addressed it to you.”
“Me?” What the… “I need to know what that says.”
“I understand. It’s with the local PD. Two officers are outside. I believe they have it for you.”
I think I rush out a thank you, but I'm already charging out the doors. When the young officer sees me, he wastes no time walking us around the corner and handing me the note in a paper bag with a glove.
“Put this on. We’re still checking it for prints. Just in case,” he murmurs.
I nod, feeling a knot form in my throat.
“Sad, isn’t it? I don’t know her story, but any time I get a call from that facility, it hurts.”
I don’t respond. Can’t.
I go straight to the note. I pull it from the paper, hands shaking. I'm trying desperately to utilize my talents. On my team, I'm known for being able to read between the lines. To see into people’s lives in a way nobody else seems to be able to. It’s my specialty.
But today, I can’t focus. I'm shaking so hard I fear I may rip the note in front of me.
Landon-
Tammy needs to get her Z’s.
Tammy needs safety for her and her animals.
Tammy can’t do it anymore.
Keep thinking, Landon.
Tammy
What the…
“What is this?” I hiss.
Both officers gape at me, unsure. I shove past them and charge down the hall. Someone is gonna get ripped if Kyle is not here with Carson beside him. I storm to the front desk, where I run into exactly who I fucking prayed I would.
“Landon, slow down.”
I crash right into Kyle’s extended hands.
“Essie didn’t do this because she wanted to die. Someone broke into her room. Someone did something to scare her into doing this, Kyle!”
Kyle’s eyes sharpen. He grabs me by the arms, pulls me outside, and pins me with intense brown eyes.
“Explain.”
“Look at this shit.”
I slam the note to his chest, only pulling back when I realize I haven’t given him a glove. So I do that first. There really could be evidence on this. I'm not risking anything because of my anger.
Kyle scans the note and looks back up at me, brows creased.
“Landon, she can talk?”
Shit, this will be fun to explains.
“Sometimes,” I mutter, looking away.
“Landon!” Kyle’s voice cuts like a whip. “They could pull your badge for this.”
“I know.”
“Well, then why the fuck… why, Landon?”
“She asked me not to,” I murmur.
Kyle’s quiet for a long time. “You’ve gotten attached.”
I nod.
“You like her.”
I look up at my partner and it all just… hits me. Evie. Essie. Whoever the fuck scared Essie into doing this.
And I cry.
Yep.
Like a pussy ass bitch, my head falls in my hands and I sob right in front of my partner. And Kyle, even cold, militant Kyle, bro-h
ugs me and he lets me.
All while whispering, “You’re fucked, man,” to, you know, comfort me.
“Sorry. Fuck, I'm sorry. Jesus Christ, I'm a mess.”
I pull away. He just nods, but that’s Kyle.
“We’ll keep her safe, man. I don’t know about you, but we won’t let anything happen to Essie.”
“Thank you, Kyle.”
“I mean it. Don’t worry. We’ll loop in Brad and Collin. They’ll have so much security here, no one will get in or out without our say-so.”
“Good.”
Because all I can see in my mind are her fearful green eyes as some faceless man threatens her. Those same scared, wide eyes she’s now trusted me with on two occasions.
I need to see her.
“You need to call Collin. Now,” Kyle interrupts my thoughts.
“I want to see her first.”
“No one’s allowed in there right now. She’s not mentally stable for visitors. Or agents.” Kyle catches my facial expression and scowls. “Or agents that may emotionally confuse the hell out of her.”
“I haven’t done anything wrong.”
Kyle sighs. “You didn’t mean to. I believe that. But for now, you’re gonna listen to me. I'm gonna give you an agenda, because frankly, I don’t think you’re capable of functioning without one right now.”
He’s right. I'm not even gonna shit on him for that.
“First, you’re gonna talk to whoever found her, find out what they know, then right after, you’re going to call Collin and let him know what’s going on. He may be dealing with personal issues right now, but he’ll want to be informed ASAP. Clear?”
“Got it,” I murmur.
“Good. Now go. Let me know what Collin says.”
Feeling temporarily numb, I walk the other way to talk to the local PD. Why, Essie? Why? Who threatened you? How did they break in?
That note she wrote me was her trying to give me a message. And Essie’s a genius, so decrypting her message, well, that will be the challenge of my career.
Keep thinking, Landon.
If that’s not insight into her intentions, I don’t know what is.
* * *
“She was found by a staff member, Edna Wilson.”
Oh shit, not Edna.
“Ms. Wilson is extremely shook up by the whole ordeal, but she handled it well. Called 911 immediately. Her quick actions saved Essie’s life. When we arrived on the scene, Essie was unconscious in a chair by the window. Edna had t-shirts around both of her wrists, but there was very clearly quite a bit of blood loss. A small knife was found on the scene.”