by Ruby Dixon
"You weren't always like oil and water," I point out. "You slept with him so he must have done something right."
Bridget lets out a bitter laugh. "I thought it'd just be casual sex. Hook up and have fun while the world is burning down around my ears, you know? Except…I'm still here, nothing's burned down, and it doesn't seem like the sex was all that casual."
"But it sucked, right? The sex?"
She nods.
"Did you tell him it sucked? Did you point out it was awful and you weren't having fun?"
She shakes her head and stares at the fire. "I didn't want to hurt his feelings. Stupid, right? But it also didn't make me want to have sex with him again. His equipment's too big. It's no fun."
"Mmmm." What do I say to that? In my experience, there's no such thing as too big. You can always have SOME fun. But Bridget seems like she has some issues, and I wonder if there's more going on than she lets on. "But you still want him."
With an anxious twisting of her hands, Bridget sighs. "It's just…when there's no sex involved and we talk, he's…nice. Sweet. He makes me laugh. And I can't stop thinking about him, so I wonder if I'm the problem."
What the hell am I supposed to say to that? She's the problem as much as A'tam is. He's overenthusiastic and Bridget doesn't communicate. They're a bad combination and yet they can't seem to get enough of each other. "So…you brought me breakfast because you wanted to talk about A'tam?"
She gives me a sheepish look. "Actually I wanted your help."
My eyebrows go up. "My help?" This is starting to sound suspiciously like A'tam when he showed up yesterday demanding my help, too.
"Yeah." She fiddles with a lock of her hair, uncomfortable. "You're just so confident in yourself. In your body. And I'm…not. And I want to learn. So I wanted to see if you would teach me how to dance like you do."
I blink, not entirely sure I heard her correctly. "You want me to teach you how to strip?"
"Yes?" Bridget twists her hands again. "And no? I mean, not publicly of course. I just want to learn how to move in a seductive way. I want to show A'tam I can be sexy. I want to blow his mind."
"He's a man. You want to blow his mind? Tell him you're up for sex." She doesn't laugh at my joke, though, and I bite back my sigh. Right. "So you want to learn how to dance. Can I ask what brought this on?"
"Daisy," Bridget says bluntly.
"Daisy?"
She nods, her expression more determined. "I overheard her talking to Flor. She said she was going to talk to you about possibly learning how to dance to impress a guy and…well…I thought I'd beat her to the chase. You'll teach me and not her?"
This is so weird. "Daisy hasn't asked, but…if she does, I mean, I guess I can tell her I'm busy?"
It's the right thing to say. Bridget gives me a relieved look "Oh my god, thank you, Raven. You're amazing. When do you want to start? Tomorrow?"
"Tomorrow's fine." I'm still baffled by the entire conversation, just a little. "I'll come up with some basic moves and an easy routine and we'll start tackling it. I've got a skin I've got to finish up this afternoon and I want to keep an eye out for U'dron."
"That works," she says excitedly. "I'll bring breakfast again tomorrow morning. Thank you so much, Raven." She reaches over and squeezes my hand. "I really appreciate it. I'll be ready!"
I smile at her as she goes. She's all excitement and relief now, and oddly enough, I'm flattered. She thinks I'm a good enough dancer that she wants me to show her how to dance. She thinks I'm confident and sexy. She doesn't think I'm a gross criminal. It's…nice.
And sure, Bridget's a weird mixture of competitive and oddly reserved, but it makes me wonder if she had a harsh upbringing. How many guys did I meet at the club that always complained that their wives were “cold” or weren't “sexy”? I know some of it was just guys talking, but I also know a lot of girls struggle with asking for what they want. It's not a problem I've ever had, but something tells me Bridget has never had to be blunt about her needs.
Well, she's gonna learn.
I run a comb through my hair and pull it into a loose braid, still thinking about the conversation with Bridget. Funny how A'tam came by yesterday and Bridget came by today, and both of them mentioned Daisy. It's almost like it's a set-up, and I wonder if I'm the one being set up. But why would Daisy have it out for me?
Since I'm no shrinking violet like Bridget when it comes to my feelings, I get dressed and decide to seek Daisy out to get some answers.
When I head out of the hut, though, the camp is in chaos. I thought people would be getting ready to go out on hunts for the day, but instead, there's a huge group by the fire and everyone seems to be arguing or talking over one another. I glance up at the skies and the weather is dreadful, snow falling on the beach and the clouds thick and ominous. My poor U'dron. There's a stiff, cold breeze coming in off the water and I hug my cloak tighter to my body and try not to worry. He can take care of himself. He can.
I head over to the fire and listen in to the conversations, sidling my way forward. Willa ladles out a cup of shrimp tea and offers it to me as I approach, and I take it with a quick nod of thanks. I fish the “shrimp” out of my cup and toss it into the fire, then squeeze onto a rock next to Elly. Daisy's on the far side of the fire, deep in conversation with Brooke.
"Survivor is two teams," Devi says, waving a piece of charcoal as she writes on a rock. "There's a team challenge, and then the losing team has to vote someone off of their tribe."
"But I like my tribe. I do not wish to see anyone leave," J'shel says. "It seems harsh that they would be outcast forever."
"Your team's tribe, not your real tribe," Hannah adds. "Like if you're on the blue tribe or the red tribe, then you get voted off."
"And you become part of the other tribe?" R'jaal asks.
Both Devi and Hannah groan. "No. You're just out of the competition."
"But why would your tribe do such a thing?" J'shel looks upset. "It seems cruel."
"It's a game," Hannah says again, tugging on his long braid in a lighthearted attempt to tease her distressed mate. "People get voted off the tribes until you're down to one person, and that person wins the knife."
"But what if you do not want to be voted off? I do not wish to leave Tall Horn and join a red tribe. I want to stay in mine."
"I do not wish to leave Strong Arm," N'dek adds.
"You know what? We're going to call them teams from now on," Devi says loudly. "Everyone, they are TEAMS, not tribes."
"Another competition for a knife?" I ask Willa when she passes by.
She rolls her eyes, nodding. "Since the last one went so well, right? And the weather's nasty today so everyone's sticking around camp. They decided it might be fun to plan another round of games." She shakes her head. "They don't understand some of the shyer members aren't going to want to play a cutthroat survivor-type game." Willa hustles away, handing a cup of tea to her ugly mate, and she caresses his cheek as she passes by. I'm sure she's thinking about Gren, who keeps mostly to himself when he's not with Willa or hanging around with the kids. Poor Gren. He seems nice enough, for all that he's different. Maybe he and Juth would get along well.
I sip my tea, listening to the bickering, when Devi starts to write names on a skin. "Okay, we're going to find out who wants to play and who doesn't. I'm in, Hannah's in. N'dek is in. Sam, are you in?"
"Sure?" Sam calls back.
Devi looks up from her writing, and her gaze lands on me. "Raven, are you in?"
"Can I be on the same tribe as U'dron?" I ask.
"I'm not sure if he can play," Hannah points out. "He's not here and if we start the games tomorrow—"
"Then I don't want to play."
Hannah crosses her eyes at me. "Okay, fine. He can play. We'll just work around him being absent. So you two are in?"
"Can we be on the same tribe?" I ask again.
"Team," Devi points out. "And if you want to, I'm sure it can be arranged."
"G
irl, didn't you ever watch Survivor?" Flor asks, leaning forward to look over at me. "The couples always get split up first."
I shrug. I don't really care about the knife. I just want to be with U'dron. "We'll see how it all shakes out."
"If that's your strategy," Flor warns, grinning. "Good to know. When's your guy gonna be back?"
"Soon." I lift the tea cup to my lips so I don't have to say more than that. Truth be told, I don't know when he'll be back, and it's worrying me. I search out O'jek, A'tam, and I'rec with my gaze, but they all seem unconcerned that U'dron has been gone for days now. I want to ask how long these things normally take, but I don't want to make it seem like I'm not utterly confident in his abilities.
I am. I just…worry. Any girl would.
So I decide to focus on what I can control, and when Brooke gets up from her seat next to Daisy, I set my cup back down by the fire and quickly sidle over to sit with the newcomer. "Hi," I say brightly. "You got a moment?"
Daisy gives me a broad grin, her pretty face lighting up. "Raven! Of course I do."
I thumb a gesture away from the group. "Can we go somewhere quieter?"
If she's surprised by this request, she doesn't show it. Daisy picks up the hem of her fur cloak as if she's wearing a fancy ball gown and saunters away from the gathering. I follow behind her, noticing her movements. She's effortlessly graceful, and her hair is perfect and shiny despite a few weeks on the beach at this point. No wonder Bridget is intimidated by her. Daisy looks as if she could handle any situation with a pleasant smile and a cheerful word.
"I'm so delighted we're getting a chance to talk," Daisy tells me as we head toward the beach. The waves are more than a little chaotic today, but I don't plan on going in the water. "I feel as if we have barely gotten a chance to speak."
She's not wrong—it feels as if everything's been chaos since she arrived. "That's funny, because your name comes up a lot when everyone else talks to me."
"Oh?" Daisy casts a shrewd look in my direction. "You don't say?"
"Wanna take a guess as to who's brought you up?" I keep my tone friendly but firm.
"Well, hopefully it's A'tam. That poor boy is utterly lost." She shakes her head, red-gold ringlets bouncing on her shoulders. "I've been trying so hard to guide him and Bridget together, but they're determined to be stubborn. I've had to resort to a bit of trickery." She shoots me a mischievous look. "The trick is to not let them know I'm interfering."
Despite my misgivings, I find myself smiling. "I wondered why both of them showed up asking me for advice on how to woo the other person."
Her eyes go wide. "Have you ever met two such bull-headed people? Kef me, they're dreadful." She shivers, hugging the fur close to her, khui blue eyes shining with enthusiasm. "But despite everything, A'tam can think of nothing but Bridget, and Bridget clearly wants him, so I'm trying to help their love blossom."
"I'm not entirely sure it's love," I point out. "You kind of have to have a real conversation with someone you love, and those two are clearly not talking."
"It's love," she states again with a dreamy sigh. "I wish someone thought of me half as much as A'tam does Bridget. But I suppose until then, all I can do is try to push those two together." Her expression is downright wistful. "I do so love seeing people in love." She turns to look at me. "Speaking of, where is your big, strapping young man?"
It's my turn for the wistful sigh. "Hunting. He'll be back soon."
I hope. If it takes much longer, I might start climbing the walls—or worse, go after him.
31
One Week Later
RAVEN
Bridget rolls her hips, the motion neither smooth nor graceful as she sinks low. She turns slowly…and nearly falls over.
I fight back a wince. "You're getting better, I think?"
Bridget just flops onto the floor of the hut and sighs, staring up at the ceiling. "We can both be honest. I am not a dancer. I have the dancing ability of a middle-aged dad."
My lips twitch with amusement. While she's not entirely wrong, she also tries hard. "Don't give up. Some of it is just remembering to be loose with your body. Think fluid. You're still incredibly tense when you dance."
"Because I'm concentrating!"
"Maybe concentrate less and focus on how you feel more?" I sit down and cross my legs in front of me, taking a break since it looks like Bridget's not getting up from the floor anytime soon. "And practice. Practice is the number one thing to remember. And stretching. And being loose."
"That's three things."
I nudge her with my foot. "I said I was a dancer, not a mathematician."
She laughs, and I smile, too. The last week has flown by, at least, with Bridget's company. She makes up excuses every day as to why she needs to hang out around camp instead of gathering herbs or checking traps, and takes turns cooking or sewing or drying meat for storage. When the chores are done for the day, she meets with me in U'dron's hut and we practice dancing. A lot of it is just basic movements and learning to work your body in a sexy manner, but Bridget is absolutely terrible at it. She doesn't give up, though, and has a good sense of humor, and it's become a lot of fun for me to work on the dancing with her.
"Maybe I should have you teach me to twerk," Bridget says thoughtfully.
"I don't have the ass for twerking, and neither do you." I lean over and tap her shoulder. "Sit up. Let's practice some of your floor work, okay? Remember to arch your feet because it makes them look elegant."
The other woman heaves out a huge sigh. "Did I mention my feet are a size ten?"
"Did I mention I don't care? It doesn't mean you can't be sexy." I nudge her again. After getting to know her a little better, I'm starting to see what the problem is between Bridget and A'tam. Bridget can be loud and playful at times, but I suspect it's to cover intense insecurity. She's completely awkward with her body in a way that makes me wonder if she's ever relaxed enough to have decent sex. If she confessed to me that she'd grown up with puritanical parents and hadn't touched her own pussy until the age of twenty, I wouldn't bat an eye. "Come on. It's just getting used to moving and feeling yourself. You find one dance move you're really good at and focus on that. You're getting better with the floor work every day, so let's practice some of that."
"Because it doesn't require balance," she grumbles, but she rolls onto her belly obediently and tries a sinuous move, arching her feet into the air.
It's almost good. Almost. "Keep working it," I tell her encouragingly. "Tighten your legs when you roll your hips, and—"
Someone scratches at the hut's entrance flap.
Bridget lets out a horrified yelp and scrambles to her feet. "Who is that?"
"I don't know," I hiss, putting a finger to my lips. Bridget absolutely wants our lessons to be private and secret, and…I don't blame her after seeing her moves. But she's getting better, and once she builds some confidence, she's going to kill it. I get up and hurry over to the doorway, peeking out.
It's O'jek. Ever silent, ever solemn. He gives me a nod.
My heart catches in my throat. I don't need for him to say more than that. I know exactly what that means.
U'dron's home.
I turn to Bridget, wild eyed. "I've got to go."
"Is something wrong?" She grabs one of her boots and puts it on, hopping. "Do you need help with something?"
"No! I'm just…I've got to go." I repeat, throwing on my boots and not bothering to lace them. I fling a fur cloak around my shoulders and dart back out of the hut, looking for O'jek. He didn't wait around to see if I'd follow him. Instead, I see him standing with A'tam and I'rec a short distance away, their gazes locked on something in the distance.
I know who that is.
Excitement bubbling in my chest, I race through the camp, toward the distant hills, where O'jek and the others seem to be focused. Sure enough, there's a figure staggering out of the snow, his footsteps slow but determined. He's covered in shaggy white fur, and for a moment, I think it's
one of those awful metlak things that the others have mentioned, the creatures that live in the mountains.
But then he straightens, pausing, and it's my U'dron. I recognize his frame anywhere.
With a squeal, I run toward him, my footsteps spraying sand and pebbles on the beach. He's still a fair distance away, the cliffs that lead to the steep mountains more distant than I thought. I don't care. I keep running, determined to be the first to his side, and when he sees me, his pace picks up a little. He jogs, turning toward me, and it's obvious that every step he takes is utterly weary. "U'dron!" I call out. "U'dron!"
When I get to him, he looks…awful. He's covered head to toe in badly made furs, his skin smothered in mud and grime and god knows what else. His face is a little more hollow and pronounced than I'd like, but he smiles at me and I know it's my guy. He drops the thing he's dragging behind him and puts his hands out for me.
I fling myself into his arms, squealing again, and knock us both to the ground.
U'dron grunts as we land on the sand, and I pepper his mouth with kiss after kiss. His hands roam all over my body, frantic in their need, just as much as I am. "R'ven. My R'ven."
"You…smell…so…bad…"I tell him with delight between each kiss. "God, I'm so glad you're home. You—" When he winces, I sit up, worried. "Are you hurt?"
He grunts again. "Just sore."
I pull at the furs stuck to his body. They're sticky on the underside, and I realize he didn't scrape them to prepare them. I picture him cutting a skin off a creature, shivering, and then just dropping it onto himself for warmth. It's disgusting…but he did what he had to do to survive. My hands skim over his chest, equally sticky. "Please tell me all this blood isn't yours."
"Most is not."
"Most?!" I study him with increasing worry. "I'm taking you to the healer, right now!"
U'dron shakes his head, rubbing my arm. "I am fine. Just tired. I wish to see I'rec and the others first."
He's come this far, and I can tell from the look on his face that he won't be deterred. All right, then. With a sigh of frustration, I roll off of him and help him get to his feet. If this is so important he must see the others in his clan first, I won't stand in the way.