I turned to her, my hands on my hips.
“Maybe… maybe you’re right. But I can’t just ignore what I’m feeling.”
“Well, what are you feeling?”
I was now sitting right next to her, staring into my small wardrobe that had clothes overflowing to the point where they could create an avalanche.
“First,” Deb raised her pointer finger. “If you’re still going to keep your stuff in here, you have to promise me to help you clean this… shit up.” She squinted at my messy jumble of clothing.
I shook my head, my cheek brushing against her blazer.
“Now continue,” she said, spreading her arms. “You were telling me how you feel?”
“Yeah,” I began, my voice low. “When I met his parents…”
Deb’s eyes widened and she pushed me off her shoulder.
“You met his parents? Holy shit, woman.”
“Um, you do know that we might get married in a few months, right? I don’t think meeting his parents is really that big of a deal… all things considered.”
She curled her lower lips and shrugged. “Yeah, I keep forgetting you guys have the weirdest relationship in the entire world. Anyway, so what happened when you met his parents? If they were mean to you or anything, I swear I’ll kick their asses.”
I laughed.
“On the contrary. They couldn’t be sweeter and more welcoming. But it’s just this thing his mom said. I mean, she was under heavy medication so everyone just… ignored it.”
“What did she say?”
“She told Arthur to not do to me what he did to Sophie, his ex-wife.”
Deb rolled her eyes and groaned.
“They are going to be divorced… in a week, you said, right?”
I nodded.
“So, who cares whatever happened between them both. You of all people should know what it’s like to play the blame game after a relationship ends. I don’t know Arthur all that much, but he seems like the kind of guy who wouldn’t hurt a fly. Damn… that rhymed, didn’t it?”
I smacked her shoulder. “Can you ever be serious? For once in your goddamn life?”
“I really think we need to do something about you hitting me all the time. Next time that hand of yours touches my shoulder, I’m calling the cops, no joke.”
I smirked, nodding at her phone.
“Go ahead. Call now. I’m pretty sure the police will beg me to save them the trouble of putting up with you.”
Deb scrunched up her nose and shook her head, marking the end of that discussion and the beginning of decision-making.
“Are you trying to go all Sex And The City on me?” She asked, waiting for me to pull out another dress and showcase it for her.
“Sure,” I chuckled. “Only I look nothing like Carrie Bradshaw. I could probably eat her for breakfast.”
Deb laughed.
“As long as Arthur doesn’t think so, and from what I’ve observed, he doesn’t.”
“What have you observed?” I asked, dropping a pair of jeans to the floor.
She shrugged. “Not just me, a couple of other people as well.”
“Huh?”
She arched her brow and I pressed my knuckles against my lips.
“You heard us, didn’t you?”
I was so embarrassed that I could barely get those words out.
Deb sank her hands into the mattress and leaned back.
“Look at you blushing like an innocent little girl. Now we all know that you’re anything but...”
“Oh, shush, will you? Don’t even get me started on the number of times…”
Deb tossed her hands into the air and stopped me before I could remind her that she was much more wild than I ever was.
“I’m not trying to annoy you. This is just my way of expressing that I’m super, super proud of you. Who would have thought that Jessica Clayton could fuck in a bathroom… at work? This is cause for celebration, really.”
“Don’t make me come over there and smack you again,” I warned, with tight lips and a finger that pointed right at her.
We got back to packing soon after the bantering ended.
Arthur was on his way to pick us up while we zipped both of my suitcases and placed them by the door.
I sighed, looking around at my good old apartment that I’d inherited from my sister, Heather.
Well, not exactly inherited, because she too, had been renting it till she moved in with her fiancé. Her other friend, Rachel, who occupied the room right next to hers at the time, was still paying half the rent. She could afford to, now that she was married to an elite businessmen.
I couldn’t for the life of me understand how Rachel and Heather had just stumbled upon rich men who doted on them. I assumed that they just had amazing luck. Not only had they found the love of their lives, but they were now always going to be taken care of financially. It must be nice.
I could never forget the days when my sister and I would complain about not having enough money. We were both single moms, struggling to make ends meet. At the time, my consolation was the fact that we were together in that whole thing.
But now… I was by myself.
Arthur, too, was well to do and I couldn’t imagine how wealthy he would become after inheriting the firm from his older cousin. Regardless, I couldn’t bother him with my financial troubles. I had too much pride. I was stupid like that.
“He’s here,” I announced, and Deb and I dragged one suitcase each and approached his parked SUV on the side of the street.
Like the complete gentleman that Arthur was, he first placed a kiss on my lips, then did all of the heavy lifting.
Deb had a mischievous smile on her face as she got into the backseat. I wondered what she was thinking, then quickly gave up. I couldn’t figure out that woman's humor if I tried.
I squeezed Arthur’s hand with my own when we dropped her off, and were officially on our way to his place. My new home.
I loved the way he looked at me, the excitement pouring out of him.
“Hey,” I said, carefully weighing my next question.
It had nothing to do with us living together, but everything to do with whether or not our relationship would survive the next level.
“Do you want come see Lily with me this weekend?”
16
Arthur
I couldn’t think of an appropriate word in response to Jessica’s question other than “yes.”
A thousand times yes.
Her asking me to meet her daughter was a huge validation, a proof that she was so invested in this relationship that she was willing to take the risk. Being a parent myself, I knew what would go through my mind if I were in a similar situation.
Introducing a five-year-old Megan to a woman I was dating would be a big deal for me, and I would only do it if I were a hundred percent certain of the woman that I was with. Children get attached quickly, and I’d already begun to notice that about my baby.
“This is it,” Jessica pointed at the boarding school’s building. The Masters School in Jersey looked like any other school. One wouldn’t think that it was full of little children who missed their parents. Jessica’s face brightened while she stared at it after I’d parked the car.
“Ready?” She grinned.
“As ready as I can be. I hope the little lady loves me.”
“Oh, I think she will. Besides, Lily isn’t too hard to please. You give her some of that KitKat bar and she’s yours.”
“Ah,” I crinkled my nose. “I don’t know how I feel about sharing my chocolate with her.”
Jessica laughed and opened her door.
She made this trip to Jersey twice a month to spend two full days with her daughter, then drop her back in the evenings. On the other two weekends, Lily would visit her at home. I assumed now that Jessica and I were living together that Lily would be visiting my place, but I couldn’t be sure. The fact that Jessica hadn’t fully moved in with all her things had me thinking that m
aybe she wasn’t ready to tell Lily that she now had a new home.
I could understand that, and knew better than to push. I was already getting more out of her than I’d expected.
I followed Jessica to Lily’s classroom and we waited outside in the hallway until the class was over. She then peeked inside and waved at the teacher. Or maybe, she was waving at Lily.
The next thing I saw was Lily in her arms.
I’d seen the little girl in pictures but she looked more like Jessica in person than I thought. Jessica gave her several kisses and Lily had her arms wrapped around her neck.
She was shy and was refusing to make eye contact with me.
“Sweetheart,” Jessica patted her back. “This is my friend, Arthur. Do you want to say hello?”
Lily straightened her back, her hair falling over her face. I could barely see her eyes until Jessica tucked some of it behind her ears. But as soon as she was done, Lily buried her face in her mother’s shoulder again.
“Lily….,” Jessica chuckled as we walked back.
She didn’t say a word to me during our ride to the restaurant. So, when we got there, I knew it was time to take out the big guns.
I slid a hand inside my jacket pocket when Jessica announced to her that I may have something for her.
“What is it?”
She smiled. This was the first time I’d heard her speak in the past hour.
“You want to guess?”
“No,” she replied quickly, putting a finger into her mouth that Jessica pulled out just as fast.
I flashed two small chocolates in front of her face and Lily extended her arms like she was going to gobble them up with the wrappers intact.
Jessica was holding onto her hand, keeping her from peeling it off immediately.
“Say thank you. No opening it until you do.”
“Thank you,” Lily grinned, showing me her full set of teeth. I squeezed her cheeks and told her she was always welcome.
Jessica had her full attention on her daughter while she ate her pizza slice. It was obvious that her life revolved around Lily, that she must think about her all the time while they had to be apart.
As I sat across from them with my arms crossed, I made a secret promise to myself.
I needed to unite them, to ensure that Lily came home to Jessica. Money was no object when it was about a parent being close to their child.
There were some things I could really relate to when it came to Jessica's actions and priorities. Being single parents was helping to bring us closer and I hoped that my affection for her would help keep it that way.
* * *
Two months remained until Jessica and I were going to have to make the big decision.
She’d already been living with me for a few weeks and our equation at home was nothing short of perfect. We were always comfortable around each other, acting as if we were already married.
In fact, with her, I felt more in tune than I ever felt with Sophie. Speaking of which, the divorce had come through a month ago without a hitch.
After that heavy weight was lifted off my shoulders, it only took me about a week to move past the temporary sadness that I’d been feeling. For once, it was impossible for me to feel anything other than pure joy as long as Jessica was around me. Secondly, I knew that it had all been for the best. Sometimes life just works in mysterious ways, and I accepted that I had to arrive where I was now the hard way.
Things with Jessica had only become better since we’d started living together. She even had Lily spend an entire weekend with us at my place. I had been nervous about how that would go. I wasn't only concerned about making sure Lily had a good time, but I was worried that too much change would be too overwhelming for her at such an age. Luckily, boarding school seemed to have really made her mature beyond her years, and she adjusted surprisingly well. We’d even watched a movie together, just me and her, while Jessica ran out to grab some things from the store for dinner. Apparently, when she dropped her off at school, Lily raved about how great my house was the entire way.
On the other hand, things with Sophie had been deteriorating by the day. She’d become unexpectedly bitter since the divorce, and would get visibly upset whenever Jessica’s name would come up in any of our conversations. I didn’t usually get mad at her, even if she was trying to be mean, but I took it to heart when she said I couldn’t have Megan over to my place the same weekend that Lily was around.
Of course, it had to do with jealousy or insecurity, or whatever it was that was going through her head. I ignored it, for the most part. After all, we’d just gotten divorced and it was okay if she needed more time than I did to recover from it.
I heard the doorbell while I was still in bed. Having Jessica around wasn’t only making me happy but it was also feeding into my laziness. The woman took care of everything at my place and still somehow managed to give her job the time that it required, even though I constantly begged her to stop cleaning and just relax.
“Hey Arthur!” She yelled from downstairs. “Can you come down here?”
“Coming!” I said, sliding into my pajamas.
I saw Sophie and Megan standing by the door with Jessica when I exited the bedroom. Megan looked at me and smiled and I practically ran downstairs to take her in my arms.
“Hey, little angel,” I said looking into her eyes as she placed a finger on my nose.
Sophie placed a small bag with some of Megan’s things against the wall.
“It’s her nap time. She’s going to get really cranky if she doesn’t get to bed soon.”
“How did you decide to...”
I was meaning to ask her how she’d decided to come by and drop Megan off without warning. She’d almost never done that before, especially recently.
“If you don’t want her, I can take her right to Mom's,” she said with a biting hostility.
I rolled my eyes, but let it go without an equally hateful response from my side.
Jessica’s lips were tight with an awkward smile when she saw me roll my eyes.
“You want to come in for a while? Have some coffee?”
Sophie shrugged at Jessica’s offer. “Sure.”
I made coffee while the two women sat in the living area and when I got back, I found Megan peacefully asleep in Sophie’s arms.
“I’ll go put her to bed upstairs.”
I nodded, taking the spot where she'd been sitting.
I waited for her to get to the stairs before I asked Jessica if she was okay.
“She can be a little… catty, I know.”
Jessica shook her head and smirked.
“I noticed. But it’s okay. Wait until you meet Tyler. Compared to him, Sophie’s an angel with a halo above her head.”
“Damn,” I said. “The guy sounds intense. Would love to meet him sometime.”
“I’ll let you do that by yourself,” she laughed.
“Cheers to the exes,” I said as I raised my cup of coffee and clinked it with hers.
“Yeah, cheers.” She rolled her eyes.
Sophie got back within minutes after leaving us. She obnoxiously cleared her throat before taking a seat across from the couch.
“What have you been up to?” I asked her, referring to her job and just life in general. Trying to make conversation with her had been painful since the separation and more so since getting the divorce. Even though I was over the entire ordeal of losing my best friend, moments like these still made me feel like utter shit. I wanted us to be amicable, if not for our own peace of mind, then for the sake of our daughter. I didn't want her to grow up seeing her parents resent each other.
“Shit,” she looked up toward the stairs, ignoring my question. “Hear that on the monitor? I think she’s crying.”
I held up my hand before she stood. “I’ll get it.”
“Thanks,” she said softly and I watched as Jessica adjusted in her seat uncomfortably.
Surely, the two women could tolerate each other’s p
resence for the mere five minutes that I’d be gone.
“Be right back,” I announced, and made way to Megan’s nursery.
I lifted her up, sliding the stupid bow off of her forehead. Sophie insisted she keep wearing it because of how cute she looked in it, and because she didn't like it when people mistook the baby for a boy. Granted, she did look adorable in it but I couldn’t imagine anyone being able to get a full night of sleep with one of those things on their foreheads. Maybe Sophie should try wearing one herself someday.
The bow was only the gateway to the many parental differences I was having with her. It was becoming clear to me that we could barely agree on anything in regards to Megan’s upbringing.
I patted her back, humming a tune in her ears — the one that put her to sleep in an instant every time. Once she had quietened and her eyes had closed, I bent gently, being careful to not wake her while laying her down.
I waited for a few minutes just to be sure that she was settled into the crib before approaching the door.
To my surprise, Sophie looked like she was ready to leave.
“I’ll see you on Monday,” she said, zipping up her jacket, then reaching for the doorknob and disappearing.
“What the hell was that all about?” I asked Jessica, who was looking at me like I’d just murdered someone.
I shook my head. “What?”
Her lips tightened with disgust and she tossed her hands in the air.
“I can’t…,” she said, her voice shaky.
I walked down the stairs and held her wrist.
“Did she say something awful to you? Sophie?”
Jessica’s jaw clenched and she looked to the floor.
“Are you going to leave?” I asked, my heart beating out of my chest as I held her by the shoulders. I'd never seen her like this.
Her eyes met mine when she quietly said “no.”
“I don’t give up so easily,” she continued, her gaze piercing through me.
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