It sounds as if he wants to absolve me, but it’s impossible.
“You’re a good friend, Ford. I’ll text your wife later to apologize for being an asshole. It wasn’t my intention.”
An alarm begins to beep. He pulls his phone out of his pocket and grins. “It’s time to go and pick up my girl from preschool.”
At the mention of his daughter, I feel a pang. My heart hurts. I’ll never get to pick up my kid from anything. I think about Matilda, her quest to make her mom happy, and everything the two sacrificed because the man who was supposed to complete their family left too soon. There has to be a way to help them. I just don’t know how, but I’ll figure it out.
“Say hi to Leah. I’ll see you around, okay?”
“Take care of yourself.”
I get in the rental, and as I head to the airport, I wonder if Callie would’ve ever become closer to her family again. I order myself to stop thinking about the past and concentrate on the future.
Chapter Ten
Autumn
“Who did it?” I ask as I enter my brother’s house.
I expect to find Aiden and Miranda in the kitchen cooking or making out like teenagers in heat. After all, it’s Saturday morning. But nobody’s here. I put their spare keys back in my purse and check the shoe rack. It’s empty. Okay, so they left earlier.
I’m about to leave when I almost trip on Aiden’s tennis shoes. That’s so unlike him to leave clothes around. Not because he’s organized. The slob has a pretty organized wife who’d kill him if he left his clothes everywhere—like the T-shirt that lays on the coffee table.
The house is usually immaculate. I don’t understand the trail of clothes around the living area.
Maybe I shouldn’t have come today to confront them. In theory, my plan was perfect. I gave myself a couple of days to think about my conversation with Persy. My child’s actions. There’s a reason she felt the need to call a podcast to fix my life. I was too upset and riled up to bring that up with Matilda or anyone in my family.
I learned from Pax that when something upset me to the point that I wanted to destroy the world, I should take a deep breath, wait a day or two, and then look at everything that happened from a different perspective.
I did.
First, I have to figure out who the culprit was that helped my child. My brother and his wife are my primary suspects. I dropped off Matilda with Mom. I told her I’d pick her up around two. That gives me a little more than five hours to kill my brother and his wife, bury their bodies, and think about an alibi. Or, if they aren’t guilty, I might use the time to run some errands before I head to Mom’s and I make her confess her crime.
“Guys, you’re scaring me,” I say, concerned about the state of the house and their lack of response.
When I arrive too early on weekends, Aiden usually appears out of nowhere wearing his pajama bottoms, complaining about my timing, and offering me some coffee. Not this time. I walk toward the hallway to see if anyone is inside when I hear grunts and noises coming from the home office.
“Yes, more, Mr. Wick.” I hear Miranda’s throaty voice.
Heat climbs up my neck, and I don’t think twice. I turn around and run as fast as I can. Well, this was not only unsuccessful but totally gross. As I make my way to my car, I bump into a solid chest. I look up, and a pair of light brown eyes stare down at me. His gaze catches mine. His big hand holds the small of my back.
“Careful, sweetheart. Are you in a hurry?” Oh my God, that voice. It’s throaty and delicious.
I take a good look at the man who is either the reason I almost fell or the one who saved me from kissing the pavement.
The jury deliberates while I stare at his gorgeous, sculpted face. The five o’clock shadow around that chiseled jaw gives me an idea or two. Instead of planning my child’s sentence, I should spend some time at home with my toys fantasizing about this man and thinking how it’ll feel to have that face between my legs.
The things I want him to do to me.
He reminds me of Jesse Metcalfe if Jesse had darker eyes and was five inches taller.
Don’t get me wrong, I like Jesse a lot, but I prefer guys over six feet tall, like this one. Not that I’m going to give him my phone number or ask him to run with me to the Merkel Hotel down the street. It’d be nice, but I’m too busy dealing with my life to entertain the thought of having to add another person to it—even for a quickie. I don’t have time to think about sex, let alone get to know someone to have some fun.
Persy Brassard might be on to something about not making time for myself, but my life is too complicated to add fun to my routine.
“Sorry, I was…” I compose myself as I detach from Mr. Adonis. “Never mind.”
“Okay,” he says, reaching toward the doorbell.
“If I were you, I wouldn’t go inside. They’re…busy.”
He smirks. “Busy?”
“Yes. My brother and his wife are”—I press my palms together and rub them—“exercising.”
His brown eyes crinkle before he releases a big laugh. “How are you, little Autumn?”
I blink my eyes a couple of times and study him. Those brown eyes look familiar. I just can’t…“Zachary St. James?”
“How do you know I’m not Burke?”
“His eyes have a tone of green. Yours are more like Kingston’s. Well, his eyes are darker.”
He arches an eyebrow. “You know your way around the St. Jameses’ eyes. That’s…”
“Strange, I know. You guys are weird. My brother and I have the same eye color. You have six siblings, and none of you have the same eye color. Myles’s are light brown. Fletcher’s are blue like your mom’s. Archer’s are silvery-green. Teddy’s are green-silvery.”
“Archer’s and Teddy’s were the same color.”
“No. Archer’s are”—I pause, pressing lips—“Sorry about him. Sometimes I forget that he’s gone.”
We both go silent, staring at each other for a long time. We don’t speak of the loss of his brother, but we can feel it. Archer and I were in the same class. I wasn’t part of the close-knit friends he had, but we were friendly. I liked him. He was selfless, cared a lot about others, and he was funny. I can’t imagine how it was for Zach and his family to lose him. The thought of losing my brother paralyzes me. He’s my rock.
“I’m sorry about Paxton,” he says, breaking the silence between us.
I grab my left arm and rub it with my right hand, trying not to think about Pax, but lately, people keep bringing him into my conversations. He’s a sensitive subject. It’s not that I don’t want to remember him. I do. We have plenty of conversations about what’s best for Matilda, our future, and the flavor of ice cream I should get.
No one knows the Pax who lives in my heart. He’s different from the man they keep bringing up who died seven years ago. My Pax listens to everything I have to say and holds me at night, guarding my sleep.
“It’s been a long time since…you visited Aiden,” I say, trying to stay away from Pax and Archer and anything that reminds me that life is too short. “I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you.”
“How are you?”
“Fine.”
Peachy, I want to answer. My daughter exposed my life to a famous influencer who has a huge following. People in Indonesia know about my problems. So sure, totally fine.
I don’t say any of that out loud. No one wants to hear a woman complain about her life.
He looks around then sweeps me with his eyes from head to toe and back. I study my arms. Do I have a smudge on my face? Am I missing a limb?
“Where’s your daughter?”
I am missing that limb.
“She’s with Mom. I dropped her off there so I could have a long conversation with my brother before I ground her for life.”
He smiles. “Come on. You have to admit that what she did is adorable.”
I frown. “Wait, how do you know…?” I gasp, covering my mouth. “You heard her call? Of course, yo
u did. Everyone in the world knows about it. Did you hear the entire conversation?”
He shows me three fingers. “I listened to the three shows when she was featured.”
Three? My kid is dead to me.
Chapter Eleven
Autumn
I close my eyes. My life is over. Wait…“How do you know that’s my kid?”
“Did you listen to the first podcast?”
I nod.
“But did you listen only to Matilda’s call or the entire show?”
“Just her calls.”
“I was in the studio during those calls. Not my proudest moment,” he confesses.
I try to recall the show, but… “You weren’t part of the conversation.”
“I was part of the podcast. My segment was called sex, espresso, sexpresso, or something like that.”
I laugh. “That’s weird. I should go back and listen to it. So, you know about…?”
He checks his watch. “What are your plans for today?”
“Nothing in particular. I have to go grocery shopping and buy a present for Matilda.”
He nods as if understanding that I’m busy and it’s time to say goodbye. As much as I’d love to stay and catch up with him, it’s time for me to go. He’s Aiden’s friend, not mine.
“See you around, St. James.”
As I take a step toward my car, he speaks, “Listen, I don’t have much to do today. Why don’t I drive you? You look like you need someone to talk to, and I’ve been told that I’m a great listener.”
Sixteen-year-old Autumn would be all over his invitation. Confession time, I had a big crush on Zach St. James. Knowing his eye color isn’t a coincidence. I studied the family closely because I wanted to be one of those girls he dated for a weekend. No. I wanted to be the one who he called his girlfriend. He’d invite me to his house, and I’d hang out with his brothers and his little sister. No one was that lucky. He never looked at me in any other way than little Autumn Wickerton, Aiden’s little sister.
I shake my head. “Nah. I’m sure you can spend your time with someone else.”
“I can use you as an excuse to skip work,” he says.
“It’s Saturday.”
“I’m always working. Unless Teddy or my brothers need me.”
“So, you’re a workaholic.”
“Takes one to know one. Maybe you can save me.” He winks at me.
I tilt my head toward my brother’s house. “You should go and see your friend.”
“He’s busy. I can come around another day.”
Something isn’t right. I eye him suspiciously. He’s been absent for years. Twelve, to be exact. Why the sudden interest in my brother or me?
I tap my lips with my index finger. There’s no other reason to be here unless he’s working on making amends or…Matilda. He’s curious about the call or her. It’s definitely my kid.
“Why are you here? You haven’t talked to my brother since graduation day. Why now? It’s because of the call, isn’t it?”
“Matilda reminded me of you. I imagine this little girl with brown curls and a wicked smile trying to solve a mystery or help her mother. If we’re not careful, she might try to take over the world by the time she’s eighteen.”
I smile. “She’s a force.”
“You were a force. It sounds like you’re using your energy for more important things. After the shows, I wanted to check on Aiden and you.”
“He’s okay.”
He looks at me skeptically.
“Really,” I assure him. “Aiden has a solid job with good benefits. A wife who might or might not have helped my child contact the Persy show.”
The corner of his lip stretches.
“I’m right, aren’t I? You’re here out of curiosity. You want to know why Autumn Wickerton doesn’t have her shit together, or…you just want to verify that the Wickertons are still a fucking mess.”
He lifts his palms and waves them. “You’re assuming a lot.”
“I’m right. All you have to do is confirm my suspicions and walk away from the crime scene.”
“I plead the fifth.”
“There’s no reason to exercise your civil rights, Mr. St. James. Unless I have to subpoena you and get you to testify against your friend and my child.”
He rubs his chin. “This sounds serious.”
“It’s a serious matter. Everyone knows about my life. If anyone recognizes my child…I have to listen to those recordings again. Do you know what can happen if Paxton’s family gets hold of this information?”
He arches an eyebrow. “Are you having custody problems with them?”
“Mrs. Blackthorne is a strange woman. When Pax was still living, she helped us with our expenses. We could’ve worked, but she wanted to ensure that her son lived how a Blackthorne deserves to. We lived in a mansion that we didn’t need. Once he died, she withdrew her support. She gave me a week to move out of the house.”
“You were grieving.”
I shrug a shoulder. “It was winter. I had lost Pax, and Matilda was only three weeks old. Her behavior became erratic. Some days, she threatens to take Matilda away from me because I’m an unfit mother. Other times, when I offer to visit her because I want my kid to get to know her father’s family, her grandparents send us on our way. They refuse to acknowledge her unless they wake up wanting to fuck with me. It’s sad because they’re missing the best part of Pax.”
My hands drum my thighs. I’m trying not to have a panic attack, but they can use those calls to take away my daughter. They’re insanely wealthy. Any lawyer can convince a judge that I’m a fucking mess and take away my girl.
“Hey, I’m sure they won’t listen to the podcast,” he says reassuringly.
“You did.”
“It’s different.”
“I can’t lose my daughter.” My voice breaks, and I take a deep breath because this isn’t the time to lose my shit. I’m not allowed to lose it until Matilda goes to college, and I know she’s going to be okay.
“This is what we’re going to do,” he says. “We’re going to talk to a lawyer about this problem and see what she thinks. Maybe you’re worrying about nothing, or maybe she’ll get that recording off the air.”
I roll my eyes, letting out a shaky breath. “Because it’s that simple.”
He nods, pulling out his phone. “Hey, beautiful, how are you today?” He pauses, nods, and grins. “Flattery has gotten me far enough. I called to check on you and the kids too. If I wanted to know about Nate, I’d text him.”
He listens to whoever is on the other line, and after nodding and smiling several times, he asks, “Are you in Seattle? Yes? Can I drop by your house? I have a legal question, and you might be able to point us in the right direction.”
He looks at his watch and says, “We’ll be there in thirty minutes.”
He hangs up, puts his phone away, and tilts his head toward a silver Ferrari. “Let’s go. We have an appointment with one of the best lawyers in the country.”
“I don’t think I need a lawyer.”
It feels as if he’s looking for a problem to solve. I recall the time when Dad went to jail. Mom made us go to school. She said we had nothing to fear, but she was wrong. Everyone at school was waiting for Aiden and me, ready to crucify us because our father had stolen money from their parents.
Zach, Burke, Archer, and Seth Bradley controlled the chaos. Those guys always tried to solve everyone’s problems. Zach was their leader. I’m guessing he’s still doing it. I don’t think I have a problem. Even if I did, I don’t need his help.
“We’re not sure if you need a lawyer or not. Why don’t we use this free consultation?”
I like the word free. Who doesn’t like that word? I can use a ride in his fancy car and the presence of another adult who’s not a drunk, a classmate, or my family.
“Okay, I’ll humor you,” I say.
He grins and walks me toward his car, opening the door. I guess I can take this as a
break from reality and enjoy the attention of a good-looking man who smells like cedar, fresh soap, and sin.
Chapter Twelve
Autumn
Thirty minutes later, we’re in Hunts Point in one of the wealthiest neighborhoods in the area. Zach stops by the gate, enters a code, and the doors open. He pulls forward, and the car comes to a roundabout with a fountain at the center. I open my mouth when I look at the Mediterranean-style home with a stucco exterior, covered with a tile rooftop and oriented around a central courtyard.
“If you listened to the podcast, you know I can’t afford this place.”
“We’re just here for a consultation and to find a solution in case there’s a problem.”
I nod. As I said earlier, I’ll humor him.
The door opens, and a toddler comes out running toward him. “Uncle Zach!”
I stare at the little girl with curly brown hair and big brown eyes. She’s beautiful. Though, she doesn’t look like Zach or any of his brothers. I didn’t know one of the St. James siblings was married. I’ll ask Mom. Like Mrs. St. James, she lives in Silver Lake. Though the town is close to Seattle, it operates like every other small town. Everyone knows about everyone.
“How’s my favorite girl?” Zach asks, twirling her around.
She laughs happily, opening her arms pretending that she’s flying.
A boy comes running, and behind him are a dog and a handsome man yelling, “What did we say about opening the door without permission, Nova Gladys Chadwick?”
I frown. Did Teddy get married? This is news. She’s the youngest sister of the brothers. I’m not saying that the siblings should marry in order of birth, but she’s just twenty-six, isn’t she? Who am I to talk? I was planning to get married at twenty-one. Unfortunately, the groom was snatched away from my side before we could say I do and live happily ever after.
“Uh-oh,” Zach says. “Someone is in trouble.”
Nova laughs and covers her eyes.
“Unk Zach!” the boy who finally reaches us says, extending his arms.
Until Next Time Page 7