And then I knew for a fact what was going to happen. The host showed up next to me and shoved the microphone in my face as he asked, “Have they ever contacted you?”
“No.”
He didn’t even blink as he confirmed that my life was once again going to be fodder for television. He asked, “Have you ever tried to contact them?”
“No.”
Maggie scooted closer and her nearness was the only thing that kept me here instead of storming out. Drama was never good for sobriety and I avoided anything that might send me down a dark hole.
I heard my mother’s chipper, probably still high tone as she said, “Hello lovely people.”
Paul scooted closer to his wife as Samantha and the staff brought more chairs to the table. She looked like she wanted to laugh at me when Paul politely said, “We didn’t know you’d be joining us.”
And my father, Big Bad Brett Steel as he called himself, said, “Well, the crew and I decided to surprise the four of you.”
“And here you are,” I said, and closed my eyes. If I somehow had the power to make myself disappear, this would be a good time.
Unfortunately, life wasn’t like the movies. I saw the faces of two people I hadn’t invited here and probably never would.
Maggie said, “Phoenix didn’t invite you.”
No need to defend me. I was a man. But I wished this wasn’t for the cameras so I could get us out of here.
And then my mother said, “Phoenix.”
I was named after where they conceived me. No one knew that except my family. I chugged my water glass until it was empty and then I put it down and said, like this was a normal, everyday occurrence, “Mom. Dad. Where have you been?”
And dear old mom wobbled her head like she was happy and said, “We went home to Vegas when you … we separated.”
Samantha brought their plates over and winked at me like she had known everything that was going to happen.
Maggie saw that.
I cringed, but for a few minutes we ate in silence. I couldn’t taste anything. Once we had finished most of our food, I asked my mother, Darla, “So what do you two do now?”
She placed her phone on the table in front of her and bounced her hair and said, “I have a hair salon and your father works in construction.”
Memories of myself as a young boy running down a hot, dry suburban street replayed in my mind suddenly. Like they took me to a park once. I let out a small sigh and said, “I have vague memories of Las Vegas.”
Brett finished his last bite of food and then said, “Before we packed everything up to take you to Los Angeles for your auditions, we lived there. So we went back to restart our lives.”
At least they hadn’t complained on camera too much. And in my recovery steps, I’d heard plenty on the need to forgive them. That was the step I had skipped, and that my sponsors always warned me about.
I was now in the driver’s seat and I wasn’t running from them anymore. I said, “I’m glad to hear you’re both good.”
Maggie’s father studied them with his hands folded, and then asked Big Bad Brett, “So, your son when he was still a teenager had that much power over your lives?”
My father’s new tattoo of a dragon showed from under his sleeve when he turned to me and said, “We … we are sorry we spent so much of your salary.”
They had been well on their way to blowing through every penny I’d ever earned.
My mother then took my father’s hand as if they were both contrite and said, “Your father and I … we never had two dimes in our savings, and it was like you were our lottery ticket.”
Parents are supposed to love their kids, not their earning potential.
Maybe that was my own fantasy. I wasn’t sure. But if I hadn’t left them, I’d be penniless now, and maybe not in rehab. My aunt and uncle were so normal and nice compared to my parents, never once asking me for anything.
The choice had been a good one, and I saw that so clearly now. I wished my aunt and uncle were still alive, but I’d call my cousins soon. And I needed to thank Mark more often for what he had done for me.
I reached over and picked up my mom’s phone from the table and said, “Look, this was good that we talked. Please put my number in your phone.”
I punched in the digits but didn’t dare hit save. That was on her. I gave it back and she asked, “You still work with Mark?”
The only adult in the world who had taken me seriously as a boy and helped me fix my financial future. I nodded and said, “He’s still my agent.”
My mother raised her plucked brows and shook her head. “Beware of that one with your daughter.”
They blamed Mark? Not me, or my aunt and uncle?
Maggie’s mom asked in a shaky voice, “Why?”
My mother dabbed her eyes as if she were crying when she said, “He’s the reason we lost our son.”
“No.” They would not ruin my chance to impress Maggie’s parents, or upset them because she was about to sign with Mark too. I took a deep breath and said, “Mark taught me to save my money and ensure I always had something put aside just in case. He goes out of his way for his clients.”
“Like helping a boy divorce his parents,” my father said.
They pushed too far. I squeezed Maggie’s hand. She hadn’t said much this whole time.
I said calmly, “When I was a kid, he taught me drugs and alcohol aren’t the answer. And when I needed help after I went down that path, Mark straightened me out. And my aunt and uncle—your brother—showed me how normal people live. Mark wasn’t why I left you. You were.”
Maggie met her parents’ gaze and said, “Mark and I will have a meeting soon.”
Effie asked, “Is he why you’re now on the radio?”
Without being paid. That was on me, too. My heart beat faster. I grabbed my phone to check for any update from Mark, but nothing was there. I said, “Maggie can meet with him when she’s free.”
Her father pressed his lips together and said, “It seems to me that you and your agent already took advantage of my daughter.”
“I’ll straighten this out on my own.” Maggie said.
Darla said, “I hope your daughter listens to your warnings.”
“Our son secured his money. That was smart,” Brett added.
My stomach was on rocks. Had my father understood after all?
Darla mumbled something I couldn’t make out.
Maggie glared at her parents, still holding her silverware. “I’m here because I’m starting my life over. If I make mistakes, they are mine. But I’m here to win the show.”
She was clear.
Good.
This time my mother Darla’s words were clearer when she said, “That’s Mark for you. Offering an amazing career while ripping your family apart.”
“Maggie and I are on a show that awards a recording contract, Mom.” I turned toward her and spoke like I was the parent here, “Don’t scare the Carrigans. Maggie is smart and their family supports each other.”
“As long as they respect my boundaries,” Maggie added quickly.
The host walked over to the table and said, “Everything is perfect for the show. We need you two to wrap it up and head back to the studio now.”
We put our napkins down. Today had enough fireworks, and I’m sure they had enough of my grunting through dinner to last a lifetime.
Maggie bounced as she said goodbye to her parents, though I heard her say, “Trust in me. I’m here to win.”
I shook their hands one more time and said, “Nice to meet you, Paul and Effie.”
“You too,” they said quickly. And they hugged their daughter. “And we’ll always worry about you.”
“Let it—and me—go.” Maggie stepped back and said, “I’ll see you soon. Don’t go anywhere.”
Effie said, “We’ll always be here for you.”
I stayed next to my mother, who’d been stoned in most of my memories. Right now her vision seemed clear. I
said, “That’s how normal families say goodbye.”
She ran her hand over my cheek and said, “We’d be happy to call you soon, Phoenix.”
Forgiveness meant forgetting the past. I had no hopes of that unless I knew for sure they didn’t want money. I said, “Let’s see what happens.”
And then I turned to Maggie and asked, “Are you ready?”
“Let’s go,” she said, and we walked out of the restaurant together. A moment later, we were riding back to the studio in the golf cart.
Today was a disaster. My heart still pounded and I leaned down to talk to her, but instead I kissed her. She was the only person in the world that mattered.
I needed to do right by her, as no one else stirred my soul at all.
10
Maggie
Until today I had no idea how much I wanted to know about Phoenix’s past. I ignored my desire to win and forgot my doubts about him in those moments.
But after meeting his parents, I think I understood him a little better.
While I had my parents, Phoenix had his agent, an uncle, an aunt and some cousins who took him in and didn’t steal from him.
Part of me wondered what living without parents might be like. Mine loved me, and didn’t steal from me. But they kept me in that small town and living in their basement for too long.
I was here to change all that and win.
It was extraordinary and commendable that Phoenix had straightened himself out.
At least, it would be, if he wasn’t using me, and if he really meant what he said about not taking profits from our recordings until I talked to Mark.
I’d find out after I won this competition.
If I was honest with myself, though, I’d have to admit he was rather sexy when he took charge at dinner.
As the golf cart dropped us off at the studio, I realized we were the first ones back.
So we had time. I wanted to talk to him without the cameras in our faces. I tapped his muscular shoulder and said, “We have a few hours until taping. Can we talk?”
He glanced around, realizing we were practically alone. There were just a few staff, and they were all preoccupied. He said, “You’re right. The others aren’t back from whatever ambush was prepared for them.”
“Right?” I nodded. I felt goosebumps. Being alone mattered. I ignored the zip in my veins from touching him when I went on my tiptoes and said, “So call Hank and let’s go.”
He wrapped his arms around my waist and asked, “Where are you thinking?”
I couldn’t wait to tell him. The buzz in my skin made me feel alive when I said, “To your house. To the studio where we sang together.”
His eyebrow sparked like I’d propositioned him. He asked, “Really?”
I needed to apologize for my silence. So I nodded, but made it clear that I wanted to talk business. “We need to talk, and I figured the scene of the crime would be the best spot.”
He texted on his phone and, a second later, took my hand. “Sounds perfect. Let’s get going.”
We walked to the side door to head out as I asked, “So who was the waitress?”
“An ex. Samantha,” he said, and my heart sped up. He swung his hands in the air to get his driver’s attention and added, “The show wanted to upset me today.”
“Clearly both of us.” I prodded the easiest topic first, as we headed past the fence, “How long did the two of you date?”
There were fans waiting on the sidewalk, and he held me closer as they screamed for a photo. He said, “She was a mistake that only lasted three dates.”
The producers would know we’d left, as a dozen phones took our pictures. Thankfully, his limo came up beside us quickly and he held the door for me. Once we were both inside, I tried to relax. I asked, “And she was planted as a waitress?”
“Right. Should have tipped me off there was more to come.” He traced my knee with his finger as he said, “She’s an actor. I’m sure the show has some reaction scene from her about how I didn’t even acknowledge her.” He folded his hands between his legs. “But we’re alone, finally, and I don’t want to talk about her. I’d rather talk about the show and the song.”
“It’s what I want to talk about too,” I said and held my sigh in, like that might stop me from wanting Phoenix. “When we’re alone.”
His driver turned away from the studio and Phoenix relaxed into his leather seat as he asked, “Okay. A few more minutes then. So how was I with your parents?”
“Probably good,” I said and glanced up. “I was so upset that they still wanted to control my life though.”
He sat up. “At least they care about your well-being. Since my aunt and uncle died, I’ve only had my cousins and Mark.”
“How many cousins?”
“Twenty, but most are spread around the country now, and not here.”
Cousins weren’t the same, though, not that I had any to compare. I was an only child as were both of my parents. I said, “I need to win in part because I need to be free of them. I love them. They love me. But I can’t live and die in that small town anymore.”
He scooted closer and asked, “So you’re controlled?”
“Down to my clothes.” I recognized the black gates as we drove onto his property. I wrung my hands together to get control of myself as I said, “But I get why they want to protect me. It’s not like I could even tell them I have a contract to be paid for the song they heard on the radio.”
And I’d be crazy to forget that the song had been released without my consent.
“Right,” he said. “But Mark’s a decent agent, and most singers would sacrifice a limb to have him represent them.”
We stepped out of the limo and I glanced up at his glass and cement roof. His life was charmed.
My home was nothing this fancy. The brown Berber wall-to-wall carpeting in my basement was clean from stains, but that was the highlight of it.
I tried to ignore how my heart thumped differently when I was near Phoenix and said, “I wanted to do some research on Mark Powers and the contract he sent to me, and I’ll need unmonitored access to WiFi.”
“Not a problem. I’ll even throw in some water and whatever you want to eat, including bread.” He directed us toward a side room.
As he flipped on the lights, I saw the laptops and a TV that worked as a screen for him if he wanted. He directed me toward a white leather couch, and when I sank in, I understood it was more than just a couch. It had controls, including a back massager, and I could put my feet up.
I’d only seen these as single chair models, but he had a couch. I pressed a button and massagers vibrated and pushed against my back.
“Mark texted me again,” he said. “He’s anxious to talk to you.”
“Good,” I said and closed my eyes. The couch was amazing.
And no one was going to tell me to get off in two minutes.
He dropped onto the seat next to me, holding a tablet, as he said, “So you can search whatever you want.”
I opened my eyes and took it as he said, “Enjoy the couch.”
“Thank you,” I said. I searched Mark Powers.
His client list was top notch.
If Phoenix seriously meant what he said, he’d not take a dime till I was guaranteed a share of the profits. And if it was true that this agent wanted to get me a record deal, I’d be stupid to avoid talking to him.
It all boiled down to whether Phoenix was telling the truth.
I glanced at him as he searched on his laptop. His handsome chin made me wish for more time with him. I turned off the chair and coughed to get his attention. Once his handsome brown eyes met mine, he closed the lid, and I said, “While a Christmas album wasn’t how I pictured my start, if there are fair profits and a possible future career for myself, I’m not against any of it.”
“Mark seriously doesn’t sign anyone he doesn’t intend to make a fortune off of,” he said.
Getting heard was all I’d ever dreamed about. The ch
ance for my voice to express my feelings in a ballad, while I sit on a stage with all the lights off except for the one spotlight that made me shine, played in my dreams every night. I needed that moment like I needed the sun on my skin.
I met his gaze. He’d had that once, and he must want it back. I said, “Well, I want that for both our sakes.”
His voice was a tempting whisper when he asked, “So is the show less important now?”
The dream of having my own concert tour, where I sang every night, was so close now I could almost taste it, like dark chocolate. I met his gaze and said the truth, “After how they set you up today, I’m torn.”
His gaze narrowed and his leg was now pressed against mine when he asked, “What do you mean?”
I could feel my limbs tremble with his closeness. I turned to him and said, “The show shouldn’t have brought your parents to see you. The divorce was years ago, and has nothing to do with the competition. Dredging up old stories to bolster ratings was wrong.”
He nodded like he accepted that and said, “True, but I gave them good TV.”
I let out a sigh and said, “Yes, but—”
“They don’t matter.” He raised his eyebrows and nodded. “But proving I won’t steal from you does. Do you want some water?”
“I’m fine.” I sliced the air with a motion to stop him from changing the subject. Then I said, “I want to believe in you.”
“I get that you don’t.” He pointed to the vaulted roof made of glass that let the late afternoon sunshine flood the room with natural light. He said, “My failures earn me more than most people see in their lives.
“I’m helping the other competitors because I ruined Fiona’s career and I won’t do that to anyone else. And I need to show you I won’t use you. The song shouldn’t have leaked and I’m having my profits held in escrow until everything is fixed.”
I hoped to God it was so. I cupped his face and said, “I want that too, but for now I want to win.”
Legendary Rock Star: Enemies to Lovers Romance (Steel Series Book 1) Page 8