by L. T. Meade
awfully sorry,but I want you to believe as long as you live, I want you always tobelieve that Robina Starling loves you and loves Ralph, and that I cannever, never forget your kindness to me; but I cannot be Ralph'sschool-mother."
"My clear child!"
"I can't--I can't give you any reason: I want you to let me go away. Ihave been unhappy about this, and there is nothing for me to do but--butto go away, and I want to go away to-day and not to see Ralph again, northe other girls again until we meet at school. And please keep Bo-peep,because I don't think I ought to have him; and forget that you ever knewme, except just keep the one little bit of memory that, although I can'texplain anything, I love you and Ralph just awfully."
"But Robina--this is the most extraordinary thing I ever heard of! Youaccepted the position of standing on trial for this post. I have spokento your parents; I have practically made up my mind to elect you, unlessRalph himself by his conduct makes it impossible for me to do so. Howcan you, my dear Robina, give the thing up now, and without a reason ofany sort? This is unfair to me; this is unjust to yourself; this ismore than unjust to Ralph."
"I have made up my mind," said Robina. "I may be right, or I may bewrong; but I have made up my mind; I am not going to compete. There isnot only Harriet," she continued; "there is Patience, and there isFrederica, and there are the three Amberleys--you have other girls tochoose from, and I am going out of it. Please let me go home; I cannotbe Ralph's school-mother: I really, really cannot."
Mr Durrant looked now not only puzzled but annoyed.
"You disappoint me," he said. "I don't understand you."
They had come at this moment to the margin of the round pond, and therewere the water-lilies with all their cups of white and gold wide open,the sun shining on them, and there was the water itself glistening inthe sunlight; and there was the willow bough. Robina turned away with asick heart.
"I mean you _could_ not understand," she said, "and that is the worstthing of all: and I can't explain, I can't! Let me go back please,to-day: and as you cannot love me after this, forget me utterly."
"It must be as you wish, of course," said Mr Durrant, very coldly. "Iwill order a carriage, and see that an escort is provided to take youback to the Brown House. As to my disappointment, we won't speak of it:what must be, must be."
He had held out his hand as he led her in the direction of the pond.Now, he let that same hand go. They walked together to the house.Robina went up to her room, Mr Durrant to his study.
"I never was so puzzled in all my life," thought the good man. "RobinaStarling, of all people!"
Book 2--CHAPTER SIXTEEN.
JANE CONFESSES.
At eleven o'clock sharp, all the girls, with the exception of Robina,were assembled in Mr Durrant's study. He had asked them to meet himthere, and they had come. Ralph was also present. The absence ofRobina was noticed. The thought of Robina was in every heart, and thewords: "Where is she? Can she really have gone away? Has she reallytold Mr Durrant?" were framing themselves on all lips. But the wordswere not uttered aloud, and the thoughts in the hearts were unspoken.
Mr Durrant looked very pale and grave. Amongst the girls who hadentered the room was Jane Bush. But there was something extraordinaryabout Jane which Harriet--could she have time to think of anything atsuch a crucial moment except herself--must have remarked. In the firstplace Jane, who was never noticed at all by the older girls of the thirdform, was now practically in Patience Chetwold's pocket. FredericaChetwold was at her other side, and behind her were the three Amberleys.Jane's face was terribly disfigured by crying, and she lookedaltogether a most woe-begone little spectacle.
Ralph was standing by his father's side. He wore that very prettylittle brown velveteen suit which made him look something between theprettiest of all brownies and the most beautiful of all boys. Hiseager, loving eyes travelled from one face to another. They fixedthemselves for a minute on Jane with that world of sorrow in them whichsuch eyes as his will always show when their sympathy is fully roused.For Ralph belonged to those heroes who take the sorrows of the world ontheir shoulders, and live for others, not for themselves. But on thisoccasion, even little Ralph was absorbed with the thought of what was tohappen in the future; and then, he was missing Robina: he was findingout at each moment that it was Robina he really loved. Was she not hisdream mother? and was not a dream mother greater even than aschool-mother? and had she not seemed like an angel to him when he layin slumberland that morning, and when she had somehow or other kissedhim, not only on his forehead, but on his heart of hearts. Hefidgetted, therefore, and looked disconsolate. Mr Durrant, on thecontrary, was pale and cold and determined.
Girls, he said, "an extraordinary thing has happened I wish to announceit before I proceed to the little business which forms the subject ofthis meeting. Robina Starling, by her own express wish, has withdrawnfrom the contest between herself and Harriet Lane and the rest of you.She declines to become my little son's school-mother, and she wants togo home at once, and she will go in about half an hour. She would, infact, have left the house before now, but there was no convenient train.As, by her own express intention, she is not present on this occasion,and as she has already said good-bye to me and does not wish to seeanything of you, and as I have made all arrangements with regard to aproper escort to convey her safely to her home, we can dismiss Robinafrom our minds."
"But we can't," said Ralph, turning very white and facing his father andlooking at him with his brown eyes full of intense sorrow.
"But we can, and must, my boy," said the man.
"There are times in life, and the sooner you learn the lesson thebetter, Ralph,--when we can and must do most disagreeable things. Itis, I am sure, painful to you to give Robina up. I do not profess tounderstand her. I liked her well, but she has gone out of our lives: wemust therefore proceed to the business in hand. Ralph! tears? Arethose manly?"
"I will be a man-like boy," said Ralph. He shook his little head andturned away from the gaze of the rest of the school-mothers, and thenall of a sudden a sob, just like the one which he was strangling in hisown throat, was heard distinctly to proceed from someone else.
He turned abruptly, and there was Jane Bush, crying very hard. It couldnot be wrong even for a man-like boy to comfort someone in distress. Sowithout waiting for his father's permission, he flew to Jane and put hisarms round her neck and kissed her many times, and said:
"Don't, don't be unhappy! I will love you if you will try not to beunhappy!"
Now there was something exceedingly like Bobbie in the way Ralph kissedJane, and Jane, to relieve her feelings, gave one sob louder than therest and turned quickly to Patience Chetwold and said:
"I will do everything you wish."
Mr Durrant was greatly amazed at this little scene, and Harriet, whowas standing alone--for not one of the others wished to have anything todo with her--was a good deal puzzled and disturbed, and made up her mindto give it very soundly to Jane later on for her ridiculous conduct.Mr Durrant paused for a minute at the unexpected interruption caused byRalph. Then he said, still in that cold, stern voice:
"Come back immediately, and stand by my side, Ralph. Robina Starling,being out of the question, you have got to choose another school-mother.Whom do you love best in this room? Think well, my boy, and don'tallow false ideas even of bravery and of unselfishness to blind youreyes to those still nobler qualities of truth and integrity. A few daysago, the contest seemed to me to rest entirely between Harriet Lane andRobina Starling. But now that Robina has withdrawn, you are at libertyto choose any girl here present. Make your choice freely, my son;choose without fear or compunction, the one who in all respects willhelp you to be good, to be true, to be honourable."
"She saved my life twice," murmured Ralph under his breath, and then helooked full at Harriet and came a step forward. "I don't quiteunderstand, father," he said, "all that you said about being very true,and very, very good. But I do know when a girl nearly get
s drowndedherself to save a boy like me; and I therefore choose--" again he went astep forward.
But just at that moment there came an interruption. It came fromPatience Chetwold.
"Before Ralph makes his choice, Mr Durrant, I think that Jane Bush hassomething to tell you."
"Jane Bush!" exclaimed Harriet, too amazed at this interruption, justwhen she was about to reach the pinnacle of all her hopes, to keepsilent.
"Never mind," said Ralph, hotly, "I choose Harriet." There was a lookof disappointment in Harriet's eyes which fired his very soul. "Ithink, after all--_p'raps_ I love Robina; but I love Harriet next best--far next best; and she did save me, and I choose her. Yes,