by Lily Orevba
“You’re staring again, Howard!” she announced with a shake of her. “No, you’re gawking. You’re positively—”
Howard threw his sandwich to the side, leaned close and kissed her. The faint fragrance of her skin filled his nostrils as he shut his eyes to the world and poured out his love for the woman who sat before him, in one kiss. It felt so relieving to be able to let his feelings out and while he didn’t think they’d be returned, he was tired of holding them in.
Gloria pulled slightly away, a twinkle in her eyes as she sat inches away from him. “Howard?” she whispered softly against his lips, the warmth of her breath tickling his skin.
“Hmm?” His eyes never left her.
“Supposing we fall off of this tree and break our necks?” She quirked a brow and smiled. “Frankly, I don’t think—”
He leaned forward and held her lips captive again, stopping the flow of her words. He felt her hands travel up his chest and wrap around his neck as she leaned in and returned his kiss.
“I think it is too late to worry about falling, Sugar,” he whispered. “Seeing as I’ve already fallen in love with you.”
Howard didn’t see the need in holding back anymore. Perhaps if he told her how he felt, she’d be more accepting of his love and willing to give loving him a try. But as he looked at her, her eyes taking on a guarded look, he knew he had just made a mistake and she had rejected his love.
***
“I’ve already fallen in love with you.”
Gloria knew of this fact but hearing Howard say those words scared her much more than she ever thought they could. And what scared her the most, was the way her heart responded to the sound of his voice saying he loves her.
She was in love as well.
Gloria Grande, the prostitute, had fallen in love.
When did this happen? One minute she was fighting to conquer Howard, the next she was head over heels in love with him. It was the same reason she rejected Marcus’s invitation; it was the same reason she damned the consequences of her rejection of Marcus even if she knew he was capable of exposing her; it was the same reason she sat all evening in her bedroom, thinking of ways to rid herself of Marcus, because she loved Howard.
Could she tell him? She didn’t know. Her world was too complicated to involve Howard and Gloria knew he’d never accept her past. She didn’t even know if prostitution was in the past, she didn’t know if she wouldn’t return to it one day.
“We should get going. It is late.”
She nodded to his words as they climbed down the tree and began their walk back to the mansion. Silence stood between them, neither person uttering a single word to the other.
Howard escorted her back to her bedroom door as promised. “Good night, Gloria.” He smiled and offered a slight bow before turning and walking away.
Gloria pushed her door open and walked in. Leaning back against the door, she released a breath, fear clinging to her. Loving Howard would change everything. It would mean staying behind and settling down as his wife. It would mean rejecting the money Stuart offered her. It would mean constantly dealing with Marcus and his threats. Gloria wasn’t prepared for the implications of loving Howard.
But as she lay in bed that evening, she knew it was too late for that. She had fallen in love, damning the consequences. Against her will and against her beliefs, she had fallen in love.
She pushed herself off of the bed, a strange sensation of glee filling her as she began pacing.
What would it mean loving a man who loved her in return? Would Howard love her in spite of her past? Would she be a good wife and a good mother? What would it be like mothering children?
“Oh, stop it, Gloria!” She paused in her tracks.
Turning to face the door, she pulled it open and walked down the hallway. Pausing before a door, she hesitated a little before lifting her fist and pounding on it. When no response came, she made to go back to her room when the door suddenly creaked open and Howard appeared.
“Gloria?”
“Howard!” She was all of a sudden breathless as she stared at his bare chest. “I didn’t realize you’d be asleep.” She lifted her eyes to his tired face.
“It is the early hours of the morning.”
Gloria was shocked by his revelation. Did she stay up all night thinking of him? And she didn’t even realize she had been up? What was wrong with her?!
“Is something wrong?” he asked, a frown creasing his face.
She shook her head. “It’s just…” She heaved a breath, summoning courage. “Well, Howard.” She lifted her chin. “It’s been decided.”
“What has?”
“I’m positive that I love you too, Howard Sullivan.”
He stared blankly at her, making her question whether or not he heard her.
“I’m sorry, Gloria, I don’t suppose I heard you correctly. If you’d be so kind as to repeat those words...”
She heaved a breath. “Howard Sullivan, it has come to my knowledge that I’m in love with you as well. Of course it took all night for me to realize that…”
His arms wrapped around her waist, a surprised gasp escaping her lips as her body bumped into his. He glanced down at her, a smile on his face. “Say no more, Sugar,” He kissed her lips. “It was worth the wait.”
She smiled. “You didn’t have to wait so long.”
“Really? It does feel like forever.” He leaned down, his lips finding hers once more.
She leaned into his embrace and reveled in the wonderful feeling his kisses gave. His hands slid up her back as he pulled her further against himself and took a step back.
Sighing softly, he tipped her head back and pressed his lips against her neck.
“Hmm… ” She clutched his shoulder, afraid her knees were unable to bear her body weight as several emotions raced through her veins. It was impossible to contain them, she thought, a loud moan escaping her lips.
Pulling her closer, he took another step into the room and slammed the door.
“Howard…” the word came out in hushed whispers as she clung to him.
“Gloria…” A soft smile settled on his lips, his eyes sparkling with love and adoration. His gaze caused her to blush slightly. “My precious wife.” He touched her cheek and the smile on his face broadened. Leaning forward once more, he whispered against her lips, “You were worth the wait.”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Being with Howard felt different. The warmth of his skin against hers sent tiny shock waves traveling round her body. Gloria found herself clinging to him, strange sounds of excitement escaping her lips every now and then.
She found herself staring at him as he slept soundly beside her with his arms wrapped around her. It wasn’t until the sun’s rays began to pierce through the curtains that she realized she hadn’t gotten any sleep. But it didn’t matter. Gloria didn’t feel tired; there was something about Howard that energized her.
Leaning forward, she pressed her lips to his neck in order to awaken him. Howard let out a soft moan but didn’t open his eyes. With a small frown, Gloria cupped his face in her hands and took his lips captive.
“Wake up,” she whispered.
Howard let out a low chuckle and slowly pulled his eyelids apart. “I got the message the first time, Sugar.” He smiled.
Gloria felt her heart skip at his smile. They were all new feelings but she felt like she had been living all her life to finally experience them.
She leaned into him and wrapped her arms around him, nuzzling his neck and taking in the smell of his skin.
She loved this man.
It was a statement she must have made over and over again to Howard as they became one last night, but it was a statement she knew she meant. Her walls were broken down completely and she didn’t care. She couldn’t. She felt them crumble, exposing her to a flood of emotions she didn’t even know existed and she reveled in those emotions.
Howard’s hands came around her, drawing her further in to him a
s he planted a kiss on her head.
Gloria wanted to stay in his arms forever. Why did it take her so long to give in to him? She suddenly saw what she had missed all of these years, what she had so cruelly deprived herself of: love. The beauty of intimacy rooted in love, rather than lust. With Howard, she desired to lie by his side and to remain trapped in his arms. She didn’t desire to scramble out of the bed, or to put on her clothes in a hurry. There was no need to leave before the break of dawn because her clients were ashamed of the very notion of being seen with her. There was no shame, no feeling of filth and a strong desire to scrub her skin until she was pink. There was no gut wrenching feeling of disgust, there wasn’t anything but love, and it was this feeling of love that birthed in her guilt, the guilt of knowing Howard was everything she wanted, yet, didn’t deserve.
Would he turn away from her at the realization that she wasn’t who he thought she was? Would his feelings for her be changed by the revelation of her past?
Stiffening at the thought, she wished she possessed the power to return to her past and stop herself from making most of the decisions that she made.
“I love you,” Howard’s gentle whisper sent a soothing wave of assurance through her veins, momentarily stopping her heart and knocking the air out of her lungs.
“Really?” Tears clouded her vision.
His hold weakened around her. Leaning back, his fingers gently swept her tears off of her cheeks. She watched him, a small frown creasing his face as he stared intently at her “I love you, Gloria,” he said, stilling her fears with his words. They were words strong enough to silence every doubt in her, strong enough to change the rhythm of her heartbeat until it was in sync with his. “I love you, and you must never doubt that.”
“I love you too, Howard.”
***
“Easy there, beautiful,” Stuart said.
Alice’s hands shook as she tried to administer Stuart’s drugs. She nodded to his words, trying to still her heartbeat but failing at the same time. Alice could hardly focus on anything, her mind was unable to take hold of any instruction and her ears could barely hear anything as her mind replayed her day in the store with Gloria.
“Especially by the town’s whore.”
The statement was shocking enough to cause Alice to drop the dress in her hands. She had been on her way to ask for Gloria’s help getting into the gold dress, when the sight of a strange man holding Gloria captive, forced her to a halt.
“It’ll do you well to keep to this particular appointment, Gloria. I do not take too kindly to being kept waiting.” his gruff voice filtered to where Alice stood, filling her with an odd feeling of discomfort.
Annoyed by his complete disrespect for her employer’s wife, Alice almost ran up to the scene to rescue Gloria from his claw-like grip, when he suddenly released Gloria, his next words causing the blood to drain from her face;
“Especially by the town’s whore.”
Clamping her hands over her lips as a loud gasp threatened to escape, she fell back against the shelf, her eyelids widening and her heart threatening to leap out of her chest.
Whore!
Suddenly, she remembered, the stranger’s words pulling at the strings of her memory, until she was no longer standing in the store, but on the streets of San Francisco, her fingers barely clinging to the shopping basket in her hands as she stood among the crowd, staring at a strange woman make her way down the streets, a parasol in hand.
“Whore…”
She heard the word again, this time, being hurled at the woman who seemed unbothered by it. She instead kept her eyes on the path before her, her chin up and her shoulders straight.
“Shameless woman…” Someone in the crowd called.
“A disgrace to humanity…” Someone else said.
“Get out of our town!” Someone called a little louder than the rest, gaining the woman’s attention. Pausing in her tracks, she turned to the side, a thin smile curving her lips.
“Gloria.” The word barely formed on Alice’s lips as the memory rendered her motionless for several minutes.
Gloria! Gloria was the town’s whore! Gloria was the woman she had seen that summer afternoon when she had been visiting with an aunt. Forced to journey to San Francisco to assist her Aunt Lucy with the birth of her fifth child, Alice had been on her way to the store when she had witnessed the scene. Suddenly, the woman on the streets that afternoon was no longer a faceless stranger, she had a name: Gloria Sullivan!
The information had deprived Alice of sleep all through the night with several questions racing through her mind. She wondered if Howard knew who he was married to; she wondered why Gloria agreed to marry Howard; she wondered if Stuart knew his daughter-in-law was a prostitute; most of all, Alice wondered what she was expected to do with this kind of information.
Was she required to tell Howard? Alice felt the pressure of Gloria’s secret weighing down on her until she was incapable of holding anything safe in her hands as everything kept falling.
“Forgive me, Stuart.” She offered a half-hearted apology and carried on with her duty.
Alice found herself barely getting through the day without making horrid mistakes for her mind was fixed on Gloria. It was midday before Gloria and Howard emerged, hand in hand, to have lunch with them.
She stared at Gloria. How could she?! Alice wanted to yell. How could Gloria sit there and pretend to be innocent?! How could Gloria deceive a man such as Howard?!
She was so close to dropping the spoon in her hand and walking around the table to confront the smiling prostitute but she thought against it. Obviously, Gloria would deny her accusations and it would be Gloria’s word against hers.
Heaving a breath, Alice focused her gaze on her plate. The only way to prove anything would be to get the strange man in the store to testify against Gloria.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Stuart’s gaze followed the brunette as she went about her business in his room. He would rather be left alone, but Alice didn’t seem ready to leave his room just yet.
It wasn’t that Stuart didn’t like Alice, what he hated was the idea of a nurse. He hated being treated like a child and to make matters worse, Howard had practically taken Stuart’s business right from under him. He was left with nothing else to do but sit home, take long walks or bake cookies, all with Alice by his side.
Tonight however, Stuart didn’t see the need of having the nurse around coupled with the fact that he desperately needed to be alone, if for nothing else, solitude would give him a semblance of independence and with the way things were going, he was beginning to feel like an invalid.
Straightening with a book in his hands, he pulled off his reading glasses and placed it on the table.
“You should go to bed, Alice.”
Alice turned to look at him, tiredness written on her features. She seemed distant lately, almost distracted. She shook her head. “I can’t leave you, Stuart, not until you fall asleep.”
“Well, I’m not falling asleep anytime soon,” Stuart grumbled. “You need to rest and I need to have some time alone. We should do each other a favour. Howard will never find out.” He winked.
“Oh Stuart!” Alice sighed. “Do you promise to call when you need me?” She raised a brow.
“Yes, mother. Now, go to bed.” He motioned to the door.
Alice flashed a tired smile before making her way to the door. Stuart watched as she opened it and stepped out.
Heaving a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding, Stuart couldn’t have felt more relieved. Rising to his feet, he made his way to the drawer and pulled it open. Pulling out the documents he had stolen from Howard’s study, he made his way back to his bedside and spread out the documents before him. It contained the account details of his business and while Howard wouldn’t let him near anything resembling work, he settled beside the documents and began going through them.
He found in less than an hour that Howard was doing a good job. Perhaps a grea
t one. Somehow, his son had managed to double the interest made monthly. He frowned, the news thrilling and frustrating him. He hated to think that Howard was doing just fine without him, knowing this wouldn’t help his case in trying to regain some control of his business.
He rubbed his eyes a little later, a soft yawn escaping his lips. He leaned down to blow out the candle that illuminated the room when his eyes caught a glimpse of someone standing right above him, the soft breeze carrying her red gown and causing it to dance about her. Stuart raised his gaze slowly, excitement filling his entire body as he got closer and closer to seeing her face. His eyes finally settled on her. Brown eyes stared back at him.
“Hannah?” he whispered, rising slowly to his feet.
When was the last time he saw her? Two days? Three? He didn’t know. Hannah was known for constantly running off and showing up whenever she felt the need to. Stuart could tell as he looked at her that she had done something terrible again. Yet, the knowledge didn’t make him want to push her away; it made him want to pull her close and wrap her in his warmth.
“You came home, Hannah,” Stuart whispered, reaching forward to touch her face. But the closer his hand came, the further her face appeared to be. He couldn’t reach her. “Hannah!” Stuart yelled frantically as he took a step forward but her image seemed to take a hundred steps backwards. “Don’t do this Hannah, don’t leave again.”
Hannah stood there, her lips uttering no words. He could feel his heart sinking, the weight of her rejection pulling him down.
A few seconds later, Hannah’s image began to fade behind a cloud of white smoke. Stuart reached forward, fighting frantically to take a hold of her. He didn’t want to lose her. Not again!
Yet, he knew he’d lose her and if he was to tell himself the truth, he’d admit that he never really had her.