by Lux Carmine
As I entered the house, my feet slowed and softened. The sound of a male pop star crooning romantic verses floated in the surrounding air. Oh no. My palms sweat as I grabbed my backpack straps and let it slide down my back. I dropped it onto the floor and moved towards the kitchen. Surely an ice cold bottle of water would distract me from thinking about whatever horrid unclean thing was going on upstairs in Melissa’s bedroom.
Why did she even have to do it here? Why couldn’t she do it at his house where I wouldn’t have to think about it?
I cracked open the water bottle and downed it all within a minute. After crumpling up the bottle I tossed it into the recycling and headed for the front door. I sat down on the front steps and put my elbows on my knees, letting my hands fall limp between them.
This sucked. It sucked even more because I knew I would never do this to her. Sweat popped out on my forehead, the hot summer sun was still in full force despite the fact that school was back in session. I heard a familiar laugh and looked down the length of houses that lined Crabapple Street. I squinted and just barely made out the face of Steven who was grabbing his things from the back of the truck and heading towards what I could only assume was his house.
Crap! I had no idea that Steven lived on the same street as Melissa...as me! Billy’s truck rolled away, not that I took much notice because at the same moment Steven turned his head in my direction, pausing at the foot of his porch stairs. I held my breath as he held the stare, but after a moment he broke it and went into the house and I was left alone again.
I let out a deep sigh of relief and pulled my attention to the little row of ants that were crossing the bright white sidewalk. The ants, although they were traveling the same way, did not walk in pairs. They only walked in a single file line saying hello to each other as they passed. It’s almost like the ants were in high school, pretending to be following the crowd, fitting in and looking like everyone else, but they were also individual, independently so. They walked alone, learned and explored alone.
I thought about the kids I grew up with and how my best friend had changed so much over one summer that when I returned to school, I barely recognized her. She had colored her hair, lost her middle school weight, grew a pair of boobs, and suddenly thought jeans and a T-shirt weren’t her style. They were beneath her. I remember the look on her face when I approached her. She pretended she didn’t know me. She pretended like we hadn’t divulged our secrets to each other. She had decided that she was too good for me and that I would never be good enough to be friends with her again. Thinking back on it, it still hurt. After she did that to me, I vowed that I would never be mean to anyone ever again. And up until today I had kept that promise. But today the chess club boys got the best of me.
I wasn’t going to beat myself up or give myself a hard time. It was just time to start over. As of 3:45 PM I would no longer be a mean girl anymore.
“Hey, is everything all right?”
I jumped out of my skin when I heard his voice. I glanced up and Steven was staring down at me. “Hey.”
“Is everything all right?” he asked, taking a seat next to me.
“Yeah, I’m just trying to give Melissa some...privacy.”
Steven glanced over his shoulder and up to the window on the second floor where the music was coming from. “Ah. Joey Glossner?”
I nodded.
“Maybe we should intervene,” he said, nudging my shoulder with his.
“Why would we do that?”
“Because I don’t think Joey is clean.”
“I mean they’re about to get dirty right so what does it matter if he’s not clean already? It would be nice if he was clean and I’m sure but if Melissa wants to go ahead with that, then you know that’s her problem.”
“No, I mean clean... like STDs.”
The word STDs clinked around in my brain for a minute before I quickly rose to my feet. “Are you sure?”
“I can’t be sure, I haven’t seen his test results. But he slept with Amber McCarthy last year and over the summer I saw her in the pharmacy picking up a prescription. I asked her if she was okay and she said she would be when she got rid of the gonorrhea that Joey had given her. Maybe they had just broken up? But that was not it.”
“Gonorrhea? Oh crap!” I raced into the house and upstairs in record time. With panting breath I loudly knocked on Melissa’s door. “Hey Melissa, I couldn’t stop thinking about that party you wanted to have! I have so many great ideas! Can you open the door? Maybe you can’t hear me through all the music! I’m coming in!” I’m braced myself, closed my eyes tight, turned the knob and pushed my way into her room. Her mother did not believe in locks on bedroom doors.
There was a scream coming from the bed and I opened my eyes and looked there. Big mistake. “Ruby! What are you doing in here?!” Melissa, thankfully, was only shirtless. She covered herself with her shirt and frowned.
“Uh, the party?” My eyes shifted to Joey who was fixing his pants. I quickly looked away and shrugged my shoulders as innocently as possible to Melissa. “I am so sorry! I completely forgot! But now that I’m here, maybe I could talk to in the hallway for a minute?...”
“Ruby! Are you serious right now?”
I nodded and pointed over my shoulder towards the empty hall. “Very.” Once I saw that she was coming out into the hall with me I bit my lip hard. How do you tell someone their boyfriend has an STD and was about to share it?
Melissa closed her door behind her and stared at me. In an angry whisper she asked, “What’s so important?”
My teeth worried my lip as I struggled to find the right words. Honesty is the best policy, right? I went with that. “Joey has an STD!” After the words were out I bit down on my lip again and observed, waiting to see how she would take the news.
To my surprise, she merely rolled her eyes. “I already know about the rumors, Ruby. Look, he already came clean about Emma James and the HPV. But I’m vaccinated, so it’s cool, you don’t need to worry about me. That’s really sweet of you though, but seriously, don’t come into my room without knocking or we’re going to have a big problem. We can talk about the party in like a few hours because I’m sure he’s going to take his time and be sweet and gentle and everything.”
“Um... I did not hear anything about Emma James and HPV. That’s kind of scary though. Our neighbor Steven told me that he talked to Amber somebody at the pharmacy and she said Joey had given her gonorrhea.”
Melissa scoffed and shook her head. “Steven must be lying because Joey and Amber haven’t been together since the end of last year.”
“He saw her over the summer.”
Melissa shook her head again. “Well, maybe she was just mad at him and blaming him for stuff. I already had this talk with him and there’s no way he would lie about that. I appreciate your concern, I really do, but I’m fine.”
Melissa was about to turn away and go back when I grabbed her arm. “But what if you’re not?!”
She pasted a smile onto her lips. “I will be.” She pulled her arm from mine and headed back into the bedroom.
Feeling defeated I walked back downstairs and out front. I half expected Steven would have gone back home, but he was sitting on the porch steps waiting for me.
“How did it go?”
“She didn’t believe me.”
“That sucks. So what’s Plan B?”
“Huh?”
“Plan B. We can’t let her go through with this.”
“She’s a teenage girl, she’s going to do what she’s going to do.”
“Come on, Ruby. I thought you were better than that.”
There was something inside me that lit up at hearing those words. I was better than that. I smiled and stood up, determined. “Did you have something in mind?”
I waited in the hallway just outside Melissa’s room. Steven divulged Plan B, but I wasn’t really sure how it would turn out. I wondered if maybe this was going to go too far, if Melissa would hate me for the r
est of her life, if this would ruin our friendship.
Before I could express my second thoughts Steven burst into Melissa’s room. I watched from afar and Steven stood there, his hands by his side. “Melissa?”
“Dude what are you doing in here?” Joey asked, once again fiddling with his pants.
“What are you doing in here?” Steven replied, shock and indignation in his voice.
Melissa let out a squeal and quickly try to cover herself with sheets. I realized, too late, that this plan was doomed to fail. As Steven and Joey argued with each other, I went to Melissa wrapped my arm around her and pulled her out of the war zone.
I led her to my room and set her on my bed. “I’ll get rid of them,” I said and shut the door. She looked like she needed to be alone. She looked like she had just made the biggest mistake of her life and regretted it. She needed a friend, and we needed to be alone.
“Where is Melissa?”
I had barely taken two steps when Joey’s body came close, the front of him touching the front of me. I held my breath and put my hands up by my head. This was the definition of uncomfortable.
“Hey, back off!” Steven’s voice boomed somewhere nearby.
I blinked and Joey was being hauled off of me and tossed down the hallway.
“What? You getting a piece of the new girl too?” Joey sucked his teeth and shook his head, his eyes shifting between Steven and myself. “She’s cute in that tom boy kind of way. Maybe I’ll hit that too. You’re still a virgin, aren’t you, sweetie?”
I heard my heart beating in my chest for two beats and then I saw Steven launch himself at Joey, fist first. Before I could react, they were on the floor, Steven on top of Joey one fist flying in his face, the other holding him down by the shoulder.
“Steven, stop it!” I yelled, as I ran over to them. As quickly as I could I put both of my hands on his shoulders and pushed him to the side. He looked at my face. He was struggling for breath, clearly worked up. I shook my head at him and then glanced at Joey. Joey got up off floor and held his hand over his nose, blood spots lingered between his fingers.
“I’m sorry, Joey,” I said. I laid a gentle hand on his arm and he roughly twisted away.
“Screw you! Tell Melissa we’re through!”
I pressed my lips together and watched as Joey made his way to the stairs. The front door closed and Steven rose from the floor.
“That guy is such a douche. Are you all right?” he asked. He came over and put a hand on my shoulder. In any other circumstance I would have been glad to feel his warm hand, pretend his touch was sensual and not platonic, but in this circumstance I pulled away. “That was not the plan, Steven!”
“He was basically pissing all over you, Ruby! What was I supposed to do? Just let him say those things?”
“Yes. You let him say whatever he wants, they’re just words. You attacked him. You could go to jail for that!”
Steven pressed his lips together and shook his head, shame lingering over his handsome features. “You’re right. I’m sorry. What can I do?”
“Just go home, Steven. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“I’m sorry we didn’t succeed with Plan B.”
“She might need a different Plan B now. Can you just...”
He pointed a finger to the stairs and nodded. “Yeah, I’ll just go.”
Once the front door sounded again, I turned around and headed for my room to check on Melissa. I knocked gently before entering. She was curled up in a ball on my bed; her back to the door.
“Melissa? Do you want me to come back later?”
She turned and sat up on my bed, her knees curled up to her chest, her white sheet wrapped around her. She glanced at me, her eyes awash with tears. She looked so sad and hurt. “Why did you do that, Ruby?”
My heart stuttered in my chest. Why couldn’t she see what I saw? The guy was no good for her. He didn’t deserve what he’d taken from her. “I was trying to protect you, Melissa. That’s all.”
“Protect me from loving my boyfriend?” Her voice raised in pitch as her eyes dropped more tears down her cheeks.
“From contracting a disease and giving your virginity to someone who wouldn’t cherish it.”
“Maybe I didn’t want to wait for someone who would cherish it. Maybe I just wanted him to pump and dump and be gone. Did you ever consider that?”
I stared at her and watched her angry face contort into despair. I sat beside her and wrapped my arm around her, pulling her close into me. “I’m sorry, Melissa.”
“He was so crude, he didn’t care that he hurt me. He went so fast and then it was over. He didn’t even use a condom and I couldn’t stop him.”
“That’s not right.” She deserved better than that. I closed my eyes and set my forehead against hers. “Steven beat him up pretty good. He got his hurt too.”
Melissa half laughed half cried and once she was calm she said, “Why would Steven do that?”
“Joey was saying some things.”
The silence sat between us for a long moment. I was couldn’t help but relive the whole scene from the hallway. Steven had been so sweet and brave to come to my defense. He hadn’t hesitated at all. Inside I was feeling conflicted. How could I like both Jason and Steven? What was wrong with me? Why didn’t it feel wrong to have feelings for both of them at the same time?
“We should invite him to our party,” Melissa said, breaking through my thoughts.
“Joey?”
She pulled away and wiped at her eyes with her sheet. “No. Steven. And the rest of his drama crew.”
“Definitely,” I said. I was looking forward to seeing them loose amongst a crowd of girls. And maybe I could find a stand in for all the major parts so that I wouldn’t be forced to kiss any of them because the way I felt when I was around them was dangerous. The part of me that just upped and slapped the chess club guy was the same part that hastily agreed to ride home with strangers and let Steven intrude on what should’ve been Melissa’s magical moment. What would that part of me do if I unleashed it on the Lone Wolves? I wasn’t sure I wanted to find out.
4
Later that evening Melissa and I ordered a pizza and binge watched the Twilight movies. We stopped after the second in the series to start on the party planning. Melissa kept muttering to herself about how they were just no good Edward Cullens left in the world and that was when I decided we needed a change of topic. I was sitting on the floor at the coffee table with a notepad and a pen and Melissa was lying on the couch, a fuzzy purple blanket covering her PJs.
“So basically we need plastic cups, plastic bowls, chips, ice, Pizza, soda, lemonade, bottles of water, and some fantastic music.” I pointed to each item on my list with the end of my pen as I listed them off.
“Um, Ruby, I think you’re missing one crucial thing here.”
I glanced at my list, my brows scrunched up. Hmm. What did I forget? Stuff to eat off of? Check. Dinner? Check. Drinks? Check. Entertainment? Check. Salty snacks? Check. Sweet snacks? “Oh, of course, I forgot the M&Ms.” I hurriedly wrote it down before I forgot about it.
Melissa sighed loudly and threw her head back onto the arm of the couch as if I were as dumb as a box of rocks. “No. We need booze.”
I raised one eyebrow. Booze at a party? So cliche’. And what was that going to accomplish, anyway? Just a sure-fire way to get the cops called on us. “Are you sure we need it?”
She gave an emphatic nod of her head. “Yeah. So who do we know who can score us some? I would’ve said Joey, but you know him, he’s an ass hat. What about the drama crew? Do you think one of them could get it? Maybe they could pretend to be 21? I mean they’re all really good actors, right?”
“How would I know? I’ve never seen them act.”
“Right. Well, you’re tight with Steven and from what you told me about what happened it totally seems like he likes you. So I bet if you asked him...”
I shook my head. “Nope. Not going to ask anyone.” I had to
shut this down before she talked me into doing something I really didn’t want to. I was trying to steer clear of the Lone Wolves, not get closer to them. And me canoodling a favor out of them would definitely require getting closer.
Melissa pouted and tilted her head to the side. “What? Why not?”
I wracked my brain for an excuse. I couldn’t tell her I was crushing on two out of the five. She’d push me into flirting with them. “Because I don’t think we need booze to have fun.”
“We don’t, but it’s kind of expected at a high school party.”
“Which is ridiculous because we’re all underage.”
“True, but still expected. Please, Ruby. Please? Please? Please? Please?”
“Okay!” I knew this game. She was really good at it and she wouldn’t stop except to take a breath or drink some water. And no matter how long I waited it out she would win. It was pointless to resist. I considered which one I’d rather ask. I didn’t want to ask any of them. The thought of asking any of them appealed to me as much as pulling my armpit hairs out with tweezers one by one. But one of them did look older than the rest. “I’ll ask Steven.”
Melissa sat up, squealed and clutched her hands in delight in front of her chest. “You’re the best!”
“Yeah, yeah.” I went back to prepping the list but stopped when I felt a pair of eyes on me. I glanced up to see Melissa staring at me. “What?”
She opened her eyes wider, her expression telling me that clearly I was missing something huge.
“What??”
“Steven? Asky?”
“What, now? Come on, Melissa, it’s almost ten.” I shook my head and got up from my place. She was crazy if she thought I was going to go over there. What would he think? What would his parents think?
“And he’s probably not asleep yet.”
I grabbed up my supply list and headed towards the kitchen. “But maybe he is. I’ll just ask him tomorrow after school.”
Melissa had gotten up and followed after me, hot on my heels like a puppy who knew it was time to be fed. “But we were going to hand out the flyers tomorrow at school and if he can’t get the booze, then there really isn’t any sense in throwing a party. It would be a huge lame fest and it would sully our names.”