Leave Me Breathless: The Ivy Collection

by KL Donn

  “Wicked Wrench, where your gears are sure to get greased. This is Angel, how may I service you today?”

  I can’t help the laugh that bubbles out of my chest at Angel’s greeting. “Your boss know you’re answering the phone like that?”

  Angel recognizes my voice and returns my laugh. “My boss doesn’t know much since he lost his balls to his—oof.” Angel is cut off and I cover my mouth when I hear Priest growl at him to get back to work.

  “Wicked Wrench, this is Priest,” his voice rumbles through the line.

  “Priest, it’s Ivy.”

  A rush of air comes through the line. “Thank fuck it’s you. There was no telling who the fuck he was talking to. I was just praying it wasn’t a little old silver hair that was about to hand me my balls for his comment.” He chuckles before softening his voice. “How’s it going, Ives?”

  The use of my nickname takes me back to just a few nights ago when I heard it fall from Theo’s mouth. Theo was actually the one to introduce me to Priest in the first place. Apparently he was friends with a man named Bullet that’s part of Priest’s MC, Heaven’s Guardians. Their name fits the purpose of their MC perfectly, because it’s exactly what they do. It’s also the reason I’ve started reaching out to Priest when a situation is dire enough to need their backup.

  “Got a butterfly that needs to be rehomed.”

  “Figured as much. She gonna get a lot of heat?”

  I pause wondering how much I should tell him, but I know in order to do his job, he needs it all. So I give it to him. “She’s pregnant.”

  Priest is silent several seconds before he finally speaks. “You’re a capable woman, Ivy. You’ve been doing this successfully for years with no blowback. While I get that she’s your first pregnant extraction, I don’t think it’s something you can’t handle.” He pauses again. “Which makes me believe there’s something else going on here.”

  I close my eyes, not wanting to say the words out loud. Even though they’re ringing loud in my head, saying them somehow makes them more real. I haven’t talked to my dad yet because I need to be one hundred percent positive before I make an accusation like this. Priest is still waiting, years of getting confessions from his sinners has done wonders for the man’s patience. I clear my throat. “I think I have a leak. We’re a close knit bunch, so I have no idea who it could be yet. Member, prospect, it could be anyone at this point. All I know is that too many things have gone wrong with this evac for me to write off as shitty luck.”

  “Just another reason I’m glad we don’t have fuckin’ prospects,” Priest mutters under his breath, causing me to grin. There are several clubs that don’t recognize the Heaven’s Guardians MC as an official club. Their way of doing things is off the beaten path as far as clubs go. No prospects or club whores. Just five men that have taken it upon themselves to right some wrongs in the world.

  The silence is heavy as questions linger on my tongue, but I’m not sure if it’s worth opening Pandora’s box.

  “What else, Ivy?” his tone has softened and it makes me wonder if he’s a damn mind reader or if he already knows the truth.

  Priest and I have become close friends in the years since I was first introduced to him. For years I was referred to as Theo’s girl. Until I wasn’t. When I started up my operation, I knew he was the perfect mentor to lead me through the unfamiliar waters. He was patient as he helped me devise plans for all the ins and outs that come with what I do. In doing so, we formed a bond forged by our desire to save those who needed it. And make their transgressors pay. Priest and all of the Heaven’s Guardians became the big brothers I never had.

  “Did you know?” I ask him the same question I asked my dad and I silently curse the tears that pool in my eyes as I wait for his answer.

  Unlike my dad, he doesn’t need to me explain my question, which answers my question before he even needs to.

  “Yes,” his solid voice is tinged with regret, but it doesn’t ease the slice to my heart.

  “Why didn’t you say anything?”

  Priest expels a harsh breath and I hear a door close just as the noise of the garage disappears. “You want to hear the hard truth, or the easy one?”

  My stomach drops. Fuck! Fuckfuckfuck. My battered heart is screaming at me to take the easy truth and let it be. But my head is saying no. Saying that I need the hard truth. The one that I already know deep down, but need to hear from his mouth. I need those words to cut me and make me bleed. I need the reminder of the pain that Theo causes in my life.

  “King—”

  “Don’t do this to yourself, Ivy. I know what you’re doing and why, but I’m telling you it’s not the answer. That boy had his own demons back then. Don’t let that darkness touch you.”

  I bark out a harsh laugh. “Did he or did he not instruct you not to tell me?”

  “Ivy.”

  “Did he, or did he not?” I grind out.

  “Yes.”

  I take that word like a blow to the soul. Like a poison, I let it seep into every crevice until it’s consumed me. Before I hang up, I deliver my parting shot.

  “You think his darkness didn’t already touch me, Priest? I’m mother fucking Poison Ivy. His darkness made me.”

  4

  VIPER

  As I’m pulling up to the Iron Reaper’s clubhouse, I’m well aware this may be the stupidest thing I’ve ever done. This place was once my home. I lived and breathed every second of this life with my pop. It consumed me to the point that iron ran through my veins. At least it did until my pop was gunned down because of Iron Reaper club business. My chest cracked open as my heart splintered and every ounce of iron inside me bled out with my old man.

  Everything changed after that. I tried so fuckin’ hard to forget—to push back the thirst for revenge against those who killed him, and the misplaced blame against my own family—my brothers. But it simmered underneath my skin. The harder I tried, the stronger the beast became until it was a living breathing thing that slithered inside of me, coiled around my insides.

  I was a ticking time bomb. The day I looked in the mirror and didn’t recognize the man staring back at me, I knew I had to leave. The hate that coursed through me was already seeping out. I was watching Ivy die before my very eyes, poisoned by my own venom. Ivy was pure light. She was the brightest star in my darkest nights but as the days went on her light was growing dimmer.

  I knew it was going to hurt like hell to leave her. And it did—fuck, it did. If my pop dying hurt me, leaving Ivy destroyed any remaining pieces of the boy she fell in love with. But leaving was something I had to do.

  For me. For her. For us. I never intended for it to last this long. I never intended a lot of things, and I knew that I had a hell of a fight up against me if I wanted her back.

  At least I thought I knew.

  Finding her at the Blue Iguana was pure luck. I watched her as she played a man right into the palm of her hand. I wasn’t sure what her play was, but when the fucker grabbed her one time too many, I couldn’t sit back and watch anymore. Over the past decade I’ve had plenty of time to think about the day I came back for her. My fantasies ranged from love proclaiming reunions to a slap in the face and even some where Ivy ran me over with her truck. But even years of fantasizing couldn’t have prepared me for how it would actually go down. To say it was not the love proclaiming reunion I’d hoped for would be putting it lightly.

  To have a reunion like the one I wanted, would have entailed coming home to the girl I left. But that girl wasn’t here anymore. In her place was a woman born of bitterness and cold. The name she’d made for herself within our world preceded her. I’m not sure how I never connected the dots before now. Poison Ivy. The woman with a deadly touch. Turns out my leaving was all for nothing. My venom had already taken hold of Ivy too.

  Looking back to the iron gates protecting the club within, not for the first time, I wondered if it was too late. If too many years had passed. The time apart shaping us into peopl
e our souls no longer recognized as their other half. I’d always had faith that our love was stronger than time. In times of weakness when the urge to see here was strong, I was afraid I would break—I reminded myself that what Ivy and I shared was otherworldly.

  Never in all my years had I seen two people that fit together so seamlessly. I was sure that when God molded me out of clay that He had Ivy there as well. Holding me in one hand and Ivy in the other. It was like He placed our edges so that I would begin where she ended, two halves of a perfect whole.

  Without pressing the intercom, the gates opened granting me entrance into a place I no longer knew. I tipped my chin at the cameras I knew were watching me. The skin on my neck grew tight as I approached the clubhouse. A few men I knew, and more that I didn’t loitered outside the doors. A welcoming committee meant to intimidate, I was sure.

  I knew the men that knew who I was were probably itching to get their hands on me. First to pummel my face for breaking Ivy’s heart, second to hug me and ask me how the fuck I’ve been; most of these men I grew up with were used to me referring to them as my Uncle. The newbies seemed to read their superiors stances and decided I was dog shit. Looks like it’s time for the man to pay for the sins of the boy.

  Dismounting my bike, I took off my helmet and held Rangers gaze. He was the highest ranking member out here and I respected him more than to not give him what he deserved. His eyes held a thousand questions, ones I would answer in due time, but I needed to talk to Pops first. Which meant I needed to get this little family reunion show on the road.

  When Ranger turned away, my eyes moved to Blade. His stormy grey eyes held nothing but cold disdain for me and being he was only a year younger than me when I left, and my closest friend within the MC, I knew second to Ivy he would be the hardest to earn forgiveness from. His eyes took me in and for a split second I thought I saw a flicker of relief on his face. But that thought was squashed when his face hardened seconds before he spit at the ground near my feet.

  My jaw clenched. We may be the same age, but as the President of the Vipers MC I expected a certain level of respect. And Blade just shit all over it.

  “Give him time, kid. Ivy’s not the only one you hurt when you left.” Ranger’s words cut deeper than I expect. I never gave much thought to the others missing me, and realizing that I caused hurt to more than just Ivy only adds to the penance I have to do.

  “Come on. Timber’s waiting.” My stomach clenches as I follow him inside, ignoring the scathing looks from the unfamiliar members and prospects. Talking to Timber is more important than showing these disrespectful motherfuckers their place. Inside the clubhouse I’m once again hit with the feeling of coming home. Not a single thing has changed and I’m caught off guard by the deep slice to the heart that makes. If I look hard enough, I can almost see my pop sitting on the couch with a beer in his hand. His aged face heavy with laugh lines as he yells at the TV.

  I rub a fist over my chest trying to relieve the ache I wasn’t prepared for, but it doesn’t subside. I shouldn’t be surprised. My pop was the kind of man you were honored to know, much like the man standing in front of me now. Oliver “Timber” Scott, Ivy’s dad, was a pseudo second father for most of my life. Which makes the beaming smile on his face so much harder to take.

  Fuck. Anger, disdain, animosity—those were all things I was expecting to be faced with when I met with him. But this? This bright as fuck smile aimed my way, crinkling those same laugh wrinkles that my dad had, has me struggling to take in a breath.

  Ranger leaves us when Timber stands and rounds his desk. Despite the smile on his face, I can’t help but tense as my body prepares for the blow of his fist. It wouldn’t be any less than what I deserved, still I knew it was going to fucking hurt.

  But the blow never came. Instead I was wrapped up in arms so much like my old man’s that I staggered. “‘Bout time you came home, boy,” his voice is gruff in my ear as his open palm slaps against my back. My nostrils flare and burn and I know I have to get a fuckin’ hold of myself before I do something like cry in front of another MC Prez. But those worries are squashed when we pull back and I see the same tears burning in Timber’s eyes.

  His tree trunk hands grip my face. “Looked up and thought your daddy was walking through my door.”

  I close my eyes soaking in his words. I’m the spitting fucking image of my old man, sometimes it’s a blessing and a curse looking into the mirror every morning. We separate and Timber sits at his seat behind his massive desk and I take the one across from him.

  “You here to finally explain why you broke my baby girl?” He laughs at my visible wince.

  “Fuck, Timber.”

  He raises a bushy brow. “You think I was going to make this easy on you?”

  I shake my head. “I’d be disappointed if you did.”

  “Settle in, boy. You got a lot to explain.”

  Two hours later, we’re both buzzed, having popped the top on the Wild Turkey that’s always stashed in the bottom drawer of his desk. Over the past two hours I’ve done nothing but talk, doing my best to explain why I did what I did, and hoping it’s enough to earn his forgiveness. I haven’t heard the full story of what happened after I left, but from the welcoming committee earlier and the changes I saw in Ivy with my very own eyes, I’m guessing it was worse than could have imagined.

  “Can’t say I don’t blame you for leaving, Theo. But I do think we deserved more than a note left in the middle of the night.” He pauses, eyes narrowed. “She deserved better.”

  “You know why I couldn’t,” I say because I know he does.

  Ivy’s mom died when she was two in a horrible car accident, so I never had the honor of seeing their love with my own two eyes. But I saw the destruction it left on him even years after she’d been gone. Sure, plenty of women warmed his bed through the years, but his heart has stayed with his wife’s even after all this time. He knows as well as I do that if I’d tried to talk to Ivy, explain why I was leaving, I never would have left. At the sight of the first tear tracking down her face I would have caved and been damned to the poison that was taking over my soul. I thought I was saving her, but it looks like I killed her either way.

  Before Timber can reply the door to his office swings open and there she stands. Her normally bright—if somewhat furious—eyes are rimmed red and anguish paints her features as she looks to her dad to solve whatever is wrong in her world. The moment gives me the barest of visions of the girl I once loved. She makes it half a step before her gaze turns to me and I’m once again reminded of the fact that girl is now dead. And I killed her.

  “What the fuck is he doing here?”

  I hold my hands up in an “I come in peace” move as I stand from the chair. The leather creaks beneath my hands but stops with my movement. I freeze, bewildered as Ivy pulls out her Beretta, a gift from her father, from behind her back and points it at me.

  “Ivy.” From the corner of my eye I see Timber stand. “Put the gun down, Ivy.” She’s not listening to him. In fact, I’m not sure she’s even aware he’s still in the room.

  “Do you know what you’ve done?” she whispers, her voice a frightening calm—a stark contrast to the storm raging behind her eyes. I say nothing because right now, Ivy’s a loose cannon, and I’m sure admitting that I have no fucking clue what she’s talking about will be just the spark she needs to set her off.

  When I don’t speak, Ivy takes a step forward, her fingers tightening around the gun as she screams at me. “DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU’VE DONE?!”

  Behind her, Ranger, Blade and a new guy that I don’t know come barreling down the hall, fighting to get into the narrow door of Timber’s office. Blade steps up, ever the savoir. “Ives,” his voice is calm and collected and she turns her voided eyes to look at him, leaving her gun trained on me.

  “The baby’s dead,” her voice is hollow—hauntingly so, and it causes a chill to race up my spine. Who the fuck is she talking about? Does... did she have a fucki
n’ baby? Beneath my skin, my snake slithers and coils ready to strike anyone who dare touch her dead.

  To my right, I see Timber’s head drop. “Fuck.” He looks back to Ivy. “And Rachel?”

  “She’s alive,” she says, turning back to me and following the train of her gun. “But she wishes she was dead.” Ivy is looking at me like all of this is my fault. The surrounding men have varying degrees of rage and remorse on their faces... and me? I’m wondering what universe I walked into because I have no fuckin idea what is going on, or why I’m ten seconds from eating Ivy’s bullet.

  Taking a chance, I dart forward and strike like a snake. I grab Ivy’s hand and relieve her of her gun. Like muscle memory, my arms move around her, pulling her into the sanctuary of my embrace even as she thrashes, her fists pounding on my chest.

  “Let go of me! Get the fuck off me, you piece of shit, this is all your fault.” As she continues to scream, the fight slowly drains out of her until she’s limp against my chest.

  Movement to my right has my head turning to meet Timber’s stare. He stares at me several seconds a silent question in his gaze, and I know what he’s asking. With one firm nod from me, his eyes close, heartbreak flashing across his features before settling with acceptance then peace. I suspect one day when Ivy’s and my daughter finds a man that going to love and honor her, but ultimately take her from me—I’ll have that same look as well.

  Silent, Timber leaves his office and the other men follow his cue, leaving us alone. Ivy, so lost in her grief doesn’t realize they’ve left until I whisper her name. “Ives.” Those deep, storm grey eyes come to me and I fall in. Head first, I fall into the storm, consumed by its power. “Baby, please talk to me.”