by Eva K. More
The naked pain in his eyes struck her right at the core as she listened carefully to his words. Her mind was screaming at her to stop this nonsense, not to let him utter a single word anymore. But there was a tear in her heart, opening up further as she listened to him. Could it really be?
“When I realized that you had survived, I was ready to fall on my knees and pray to a God I have never believed in before. That’s also the moment I became aware of the graveness of the situation and how – with my lifestyle – I could never keep you safe. I found the perfect solution with your grandparents. They were devastated that their only daughter had died, but even more eager to keep what was left of her. And the most important part is that they wouldn’t make the same mistake as they did with her – leave her to her own bad choices. They had been estranged for a few years at that time, so nobody could make that connection. And I ceased all contact with you, letting the world believe that you had died.”
When he didn’t say a word anymore, Kat understood that he waited for her to say something. Maryan stared at her, gauging her reaction.
“That’s… unbelievable,” she managed to mutter. The wheels in her head turned in a dizzying speed, she looked down at her hands – not really seeing anything.
“If you don’t believe me, then ask your grandparents. I’ve always provided for you. With your grandparents’ salaries, how did you think that you were able to go to all those trips? Or how did you think they could buy you so many things? I couldn’t be there for you the way a father should be, but I did what was necessary.”
“That- that cannot be,” she whispered faintly.
“I know that’s a lot to take in, especially after what happened to you in the past few weeks.” Maryan narrowed his eyes then. “By the way, I know now’s not the time to bring this discussion to the front, but I know your grandparents raised you better than this. What were you doing in the middle of the night dallying down the streets?”
When she remained sitting with her spine as tense as a board and her big eyes staring at him in shock, he sighed. “Yes, let’s not talk about that now. I know it’s a lot of information for you.”
“You think?” she asked sarcastically.
All her life, she had believed that she was an orphan, alone in the world with only her grandparents looking out for her. It hurt to have her life turned upside-down. It was a real, excruciating physical pain.
But it all made sense now. He knew her grandparents’ names, knew of her mother’s accident, and had enough information about her childhood that he couldn’t just have gained from a view of her purse.
In the past, she had often wondered about her grandparents’ income and how they could afford so many expensive things. The way they had kept her sheltered, how they had watched her every move and had denied her the freedom all her friends had had when there had been no apparent reason. It all made sense now. This story sounded so incredulous and outlandish that it was much too plausible.
“Oh god,” she groaned and gripped her head in agony. All her life had been a lie; she had to inspect every little memory now under a magnifying glass for possible faults.
A gentle hand touched the nape of her neck.
“Kat.” Gabriel crouched down beside her and put one of his hands on the side of her neck while he offered a glass of water with the other one. “Here, take a sip.”
As if on autopilot, she took the glass from his hand. Her throat was dry, and it hurt, but the water didn’t wash away the ache in her chest or stop her ragged breathing.
“Kat…” Gabriel offered comfort with his soft voice and kind eyes, but her brain made a different connection.
“And you?” she asked quietly, searching his face for some answer. “You knew who I was all along. Little bird?”
Rightfully so, he looked at her warily, but his warm hand remained on her skin. “Yes.”
She scoffed sarcastically. “Of course.”
“Kat-”
“Don’t!” She pushed off his hand and stood up, swaying a little. “I didn’t even know how you looked beneath that mask. I don’t know you at all and-” she looked accusingly at Maryan, “I don’t know you either. I- I need time for myself. And I want to get back home and forget everything that happened for the past few weeks.” She touched her throat and the bandages on it.
“Take all the time you need,” Maryan said, standing now too, but wisely keeping his distance.
Kat ignored Gabriel’s stoic expression and hurried out of the room.
he following few days passed in a blur. Kat woke, she ate, she talked to Martha, the housekeeper - mostly about food - she showered, she avoided Maryan and especially Gabriel, ate again, and fell into an exhausted sleep.
Her injuries hadn’t been that severe, but her body and mind needed long recovery time from the strenuous affairs of the past weeks. On some nights, Ivo visited her in her nightmares, and in others, Gabriel bestowed her with heated memories. She still hadn’t gotten used to seeing his face, handsome, masculine, and fitting his massive frame and dangerous aura. Thankfully, she hadn’t seen a lot of him, hadn’t dared to say another word to him in fear she might bite his head off. A woman scorned was not something to be taken lightly, so he stayed away from her as well.
Smart man.
All she wanted was to get back home, but with Ivo still on the loose, Maryan hadn’t wanted to let her go yet. She resented feeling like a prisoner yet again, especially now that she knew the truth.
And then there was Maryan. Her father. A man whom she had wished to see with every fiber of her little heart when she had been a child. But a father such as Kapov? That was a part of the deal she wasn’t able to cope with, and so, she used the past days to build a wall around herself. Not thinking about it was so much simpler than letting her mind work it out.
Kat had avoided eating with the men the previous evenings, so when she stepped into the dining room, dressed in the clothes that her father bought for her, they stared at her in wonder. Maryan’s expensive tastes provided her with comfortable materials, and at least for this, she was grateful. Still, deep down - although she would never admit it - she longed for one of Gabriel’s oversized sweatshirts.
Cocooning herself in self-righteousness, she prepped herself for the upcoming talk.
With her back straight and chin held high, she sat down opposite Maryan and shot Gabriel a disdainful glance. If they wondered where she had gained her poise from the last couple of days, they didn’t mention it.
“Is that cre- he’s also living here?” she asked Maryan.
Gabriel remained silent but noticeably gritted his teeth, and the tick in his strong jaw made her blood boil. Good, he deserved to feel bad for what he had done to her.
Maryan cocked a neat eyebrow up. “Gabriel? No. He is only here for the time being. Until this situation is dissolved.”
“Until I’m gone, you mean?”
Maryan looked appalled at her brusque tone.
“Whatever gave you that idea? I want to spend more time with you, Katherina. I certainly don’t want you gone, but we need to fix things back at the mansion, now that Ivo is gone, and find out if there is any word about you on the streets. And of course, we need to find him. I won’t make the same mistake again and leave you to face danger.”
She swallowed the lump in her throat. He couldn’t possibly have really cared for her, no matter how convincing he sounded. Anyway, it didn’t matter because she had made up her mind. It was best not to get too involved with him. It shouldn’t have been so hard to keep her calm composure, but Kat had to wrestle down the more vulnerable emotions rising in her brutally.
When she directed her eyes away from Maryan and looked at Gabriel, she tried hiding her appreciation. She had never seen him wear anything else other than jeans, cargos, t-shirts, and his trademark hoodie, but today he wore dress-pants and a dress-shirt. His tattoos were hidden behind the dark fabric, and he had his brooding eyes fixed on her.
Compared to Maryan in his
dark suit, he didn’t exude the same elegant charm but took her breath away in his own brutally masculine fashion. This, too, was something she didn’t want to think about anymore.
“Well, I want to get home as soon as possible. Is there any danger left? Ivo still doesn’t know who I am.” Kat said.
“That’s not so easy to-”
“If you’re going to talk to me in riddles again, then I don’t want to listen,” she said, interrupting Gabriel.
“He was just doing his job.” Strange, how Maryan tried to excuse Gabriel.
“I don’t care about that. Frankly, I now only care about myself, and I want to get back to the only other people I care about.”
Her coldness scalded the men, but she didn’t notice Maryan’s expression falling. There was that tick in Gabriel’s cheek again when he looked at her.
“Ivo’s vanished, I cannot find him. I’d have liked to find out before letting you-” Gabriel started saying.
“But if you want to be gone tomorrow, it should be fine.” Maryan interrupted, and when Kat looked at him and noticed that he was staring fixated to his plate, she felt a pang in her chest.
***
Astonished, Gabriel looked at Maryan. They had just previously talked about that matter and had concluded that Kat needed to stay for a while longer, especially now that she knew who her father was.
It didn’t matter that Ivo didn’t know who she was and that the city was big; he might not have the mob’s resources anymore, but as long as he was alive, he could always find her. Her blatant rejection hurt Maryan deeply, but Gabriel himself wasn’t in her good graces at the moment, either.
He wanted to strangle her until she let her façade drop and returned to that temperamental but sweet persona he knew her to be. Then again, she had been through a lot, and it was her prerogative to feel miffed and take her time.
Still, he didn’t like seeing Maryan so distressed, and he didn’t like the way she treated him as well, like air, like he barely existed in her world. Damn it!
Back at the cabin, he had warned her not to trust him; he had known that once everything was out in the open, she would hate him. But he hadn’t anticipated that it would hit him so hard because, despite his efforts, she had still managed to crawl beneath his skin. And if he had to admit it, she was now lodged deep within himself.
When he had seen her tied to that chair with a bloodied shirt and Ivo right behind her, holding that fucking knife to her throat, Gabriel had lost ten years of his life. He had always known that Maryan would come, but he knew that it would take some time.
Playing cat and mouse with Ivo had been aggravating, mostly because she had sat there, tense and frightened, trying to keep up her brave expression.
Oh, he had wanted to slice that fucker up, still wanted to take the life out of him with his bare hands. But he was gone now, and this only because Maryan hadn’t wanted Lina hurt. Gabriel knew that the older man was fond of her, but had it been worth it losing Ivo?
And now he wanted to bring her back home? Was Maryan slowly losing his mind?
“Yes, I’d like that,” Kat said and stabbed her fork into a piece of meat, still not looking at Gabriel. What did piss her off more? That he always knew who she was, knew her from childhood, or that he had disregarded her with Ivo?
She sure as hell could not have believed the words he said to Ivo. Of course, he had cared if she had gotten hurt or not; his whole being had been centered on her survival. Why could she not just look and smile at him again? Gabriel felt like she was slipping out of his grasp, and for some reason, this thought made his chest burn – and not in a good way.
“Very well. Gabriel will take you home tomorrow morning then,” Maryan said, calmly observing her, shooting Gabriel a quick look.
“To my grandparents’ home. I miss them, and I’m sure they miss me, too. I can’t imagine how afraid they have to be.”
Gabriel refrained from wincing out loud. If that wasn’t a nice side blow, he bitterly thought.
“That’s a good idea,” Maryan said and warmly looked at his daughter. “They were very upset to hear you had stumbled into my world.”
“You told them what had happened?” Kat asked.
“Of course, not in detail, though. I couldn’t let them wonder what had happened to you. Knowing Ivana, she would have gone crazy with worry, so I reassured them I would keep you safe, and I’ve kept in touch.”
Thinking back on Kat’s conversation with her grandmother, Gabriel still felt slightly miffed.
“You should’ve told me,” he said before he could stop himself. After all, that little fact had him sweating for quite a while.
Maryan sipped his drink and shot Gabriel a quick look. He never did betray his true feelings, but Gabriel still noted his slightly raised eyebrow.
“It shouldn’t have mattered,” Maryan replied.
“You should know that every little detail is important if you want to keep the upper hand in a situation,” Gabriel said in response, to which Maryan’s lips curved upwards.
“Clever. I remember saying those words to you.”
“You’re getting senile, old man.” He muttered and narrowed his eyes.
“Remind me again, then, who’s your boss?”
Gabriel was about to retort, but the unreadable look on Kat’s face had him halting. She was watching him banter with Maryan, and for a second, he thought that he had seen the longing in her wide eyes. Then she stared at him, seemingly lost in her little world, but when she refocused, and her dreamy look turned into a glare, Gabriel knew that he had to brace himself.
“I’d like to know something,” she said slowly, swallowing her bite.
When she once again avoided looking at him, Gabriel leaned back warily.
“Ask away,” Maryan said and gave her a patient smile, putting both his arms on the table.
“I’m curious. You said you made everyone believe I was dead. How long then has Gabriel known that I’m alive?”
Gabriel looked at Maryan, a silent conversation passing between them.
“I told you I provided for you with money, and albeit your grandparents did a splendid job raising you so well, secluded, I wasn’t satisfied. After what had happened to your mother, I was afraid something bad still could happen to you, that’s why I always watched over you. That’s why I instructed him to keep an eye on you.” Maryan said and leaned his elbows on the table and looked directly into her eyes. “I had to leave town for a while to get that thing with Ivo started, and Gabriel is one of the few people I trust with my life.”
If Gabriel weren’t so intent on seeing her reaction, he would have looked away and cringed. He had kept such a good eye on her that he even knew how she looked naked.
If Maryan finds out, I’m a dead man, he thought. But damn, she had looked very good naked.
She gaped. “Keep an eye on me? How long has that been going on?” Her eyes flickered with an incredulous look at Gabriel, and he couldn’t help but lift one corner of his mouth sheepishly.
Out with the truth… and then we could work on our relationship.
Wait.
No, there was no relationship between them; Gabriel didn’t know where that thought had come from. Still, she had to talk to him sometime about what had happened between them because he couldn’t forget it. The softness of her body, her rosy nipples, how she trembled when he thrusted inside of her, the sounds she made when she reached the climax, everything was printed in his mind. She couldn’t have forgotten it either.
Jesus. He was starting to sweat.
“From time to time through the years, but mostly in the past few months, after I left town. He made sure that you were safe whenever you were not with your grandparents.”
Kat couldn’t help but burst into cold laughter.
“Oh, really? Well, that turned out well, didn’t it?” And then she shot Gabriel that look, the one that told him she was thinking of their time together. And she was accusing him.
But by God
, he hadn’t taken advantage of her. He had even tried avoiding it!
Gabriel perked up and glowered at her. “You were supposed to be at home that night.” He was fighting back with the obvious because this wasn’t the way Maryan should find out what happened between them.
“From what I gather, you were supposed to look out for me on nights exactly like that,” she said.
“I had other things to do rather than follow you around the whole day. Besides, I didn’t think you would be so stupid.”
Gabriel saw that he had hurt her when she winced at his words, but then, she glared fiercely at him. “If I had known I’d run into you, I would turn back time and kick myself to the moon before making that mistake again.”
Calmly, he took a big gulp of his water, watching her over the rim of his glass. There was a storm brewing behind his eyes, but he appeared smooth and in control of his emotions.
“It’s a good thing you learn from your mistakes then,” he said.
Then Gabriel watched her put down her fork and knife and look at him, obviously giving up any pretense of her eating.
“Why didn’t you tell me that you knew who I was?” she asked softly, and he felt like his heart was breaking. There was so much confusion and distrust in her expressive green eyes that it made his insides melt.
“Would you have believed me?” Gabriel retorted equally soft. He felt that she was on the verge of either shouting or crying, neither of which he wanted her to do. When she looked so vulnerable, all he wanted to do was touch her, for God’s sakes, hug her!
“Well… no, but you didn’t need to tell me the whole sordid story, just a bit.”
The crooked grin on Gabriel’s face was sardonic. “I couldn’t let anybody – including yourself – know that I knew who you are, little bird.”
“So, you just went with the flow?”
His jaw ticked. “I didn’t like seeing that you were getting hurt by Ivo or even letting you out of my sight, but I had to work with the circumstances.”