I sighed and stepped out of his way. “Go right ahead.”
He did his thing and rushed me into the truck, just to shove me in and push me down. His hand grazed my breast when he pushed me down into the seat, but by the lack of reaction from him, I knew it was an accident.
When he got in and started driving, I looked up at him from where my head was planted firmly on the seat next to his thigh. “So, where are we going?”
He looked down at me with a heated look on his face and I wondered if I’d done something to annoy him. “To the office. We all get together once or twice a week and we figured we’d do it today.”
I adjusted, sitting up slightly, just to have Cooper’s fingers lock into my hair and guide me back down. His fingers stayed in my hair and it caused a thrill to rush down my body, to my core. My mind was filthy and I couldn’t help but think about how close we were to a wilder situation. I’d never ever given a blow job outside of a bed, much less in a moving vehicle. The thought of doing it with Cooper set my skin on fire and I shifted to ease the pressure building between my thighs.
“I want to be out of the neighborhood before you sit up.” Cooper’s voice was deeper and his fingers flexed in my hair.
I wasn’t sure if he was petting me or just shifting his hand, but either way, it felt good. I shifted and the top of my head brushed against his thigh, the rough denim of his jeans acting as kindle to the flame already burning in my lower stomach. I was a fool for letting myself get so worked up over such small things, especially with a man I couldn’t have, but I was helpless.
“You can sit up.”
I wanted to whimper when he removed his hand, but I had some pride left. I sat up and put my seatbelt on, all the while keeping my eyes straight ahead. I was afraid they’d reveal the dirty things happening behind them.
“Will everyone be there?” I needed something to say, anything to say. “I have something I wanted to run by Vince.”
“He’ll be there.”
“He told me that he discovered a shipwreck off the coast of Cuba. Is that true? He said it with such a smirk on his face that I didn’t know if he was messing with me or not.”
Cooper cut a look at me and frowned. “You have a thing for Vince now?”
My mouth fell open and I took a second to snap it shut again. Embarrassed and feeling stupid—worse, like he’d made me feel stupid—I looked out of my window and blinked away unexpected tears. I was just trying to make conversation. His voice had been cruel, though. “Never mind.”
A few seconds passed and Cooper sighed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound like such an asshole.”
“Forget it. No big deal—right?” I shrugged and forced a smile. “I’m excited for the food today. Maybe I should have cooked something.”
“Sonnie—”
“I definitely should have cooked something. Or baked a dessert. I make really good cookies. Jake always said he married me for my cookies.” I heard what I was saying and tears filled my eyes. Upset and ready to get out of the truck, I jumped out as soon as Cooper parked behind Black Dog Security, despite his yelling at me to wait.
I hurried to the door and pulled it open, slipped inside and ran into Vince, who was doing his own frowning at me. I looked up at him and shook my head. “Bathroom?”
He grunted and took my arm, using it to lead me across the room and to a small door off to the side. “You’re supposed to wait in the truck.”
A tear slipped down my cheek and I wiped it away. “I couldn’t, Vince. I couldn’t be in there for another second.”
He looked behind me and sighed, his expression letting me know that Cooper was standing behind me, listening to what I’d just said. “Go on in and get cleaned up. We’ll talk about safety later.”
I rushed into the bathroom and closed the door behind me, not wanting to see Cooper’s angry expression. Or, worse, his upset expression, if he’d heard what I’d said and been offended by it. I didn’t mean it to hurt him, but it was so weird being around him after kissing and talking on the phone in a way that made me feel like maybe we could’ve gone somewhere. And his sudden frustration seemed to be directed at me and it was hard to stomach.
I fumbled with the paper-towel dispenser and finally got one out to dab at my eyes. I looked at myself in the mirror and groaned. My eyeliner was smudged. I did my best to fix it while also trying not to cry more.
“Sonnie?” Lauren’s voice called to me.
I groaned and opened the door for her. “It’s not a big deal. Are they making it a big deal? It was one stupid tear. I’m allowed! I’ve had a bad day.”
“Yeah?”
“No. I mean, I guess it was fine.” I sighed. “I just got stressed. They didn’t have to make it a big deal. Jeez. A woman cried and suddenly the tough guys can’t handle it.”
She laughed. “You freaked them both out. They handle women crying about as well as they handle women bleeding. You okay?”
I squared my shoulders and nodded. “I just needed a second to collect myself. How’s my makeup?”
“Still flawless.”
“Yeah, right.” I blew out a breath and nodded again. “Okay. I’m ready to go out.”
“Are you sure? Because it’s a barbecue, not a firing squad.”
I wasn’t sure. A part of me wanted to call the whole thing off and retreat to my room again. I was horrified to face Cooper and I didn’t want to talk about it. I was afraid it would be super awkward and I’d ruin everyone’s day. I couldn’t ask to be taken home, though. They’d done everything for me and I couldn’t be a brat.
So, I put a smile on my face and shook off the urge to flee. “I’m sure. Come on. I’m hungry. Should I have made something?”
“Nope. The guys grill and I bring the rest of the stuff.”
We made our way out of the building and into the rec room. A picnic table had been moved into the space, and another small table off to the side was piled high with food. The men were milling about, looking everywhere but at me.
I walked over, head held high, stumbled just before I reached the picnic table, and had to be caught by Vince. I was embarrassed, but I handled it the only way I knew how to. I laughed.
Vince put me back on my feet and shook his head at me. “You good?”
“Of course she’s good. Get her a beer.” Lauren sat down next to Mercer and rested her elbow on his shoulder. “Get me a beer, too.”
Vince scowled. “Get your own damn beer.”
I sat down on the other side of Mercer and avoided eye contact with Cooper, who was standing a few feet away looking at me. I looked up at Vince and narrowed my eyes. “You didn’t discover a shipwreck, did you?”
Branson and Tucker, sitting at the other side of the table, both laughed heartily. Mercer snorted. Vince just kept smirking at me.
A bell rang from somewhere in the building and Lauren stood up. “I’ll go see who it is.”
“I’ll go check the burgers.” Tucker went out the back door, moving silently in the way all the men did.
Vince started to say something to me, but Lauren came back at that moment, the pretty voice of Macey at her side. And at Macey’s side was a petite, beautiful blonde, a snooty look on her face. She held a little pink bag at her side and strode directly up to Cooper. It had to be Macey’s mom, his ex. She was stunningly beautiful and I felt like crying again.
Chapter 15
Cooper
“I have to head out early.” Lilah handed me Macey’s bag and looked around. Her eyes landed on Sonnie and her eyebrows furrowed. “Do y’all ever work? Every time I come by, you’re having a party.”
“It’s what you do when you like the people around you.” Lauren gave Lilah a pointed look and went back to her seat next to Mercer.
Macey hurried over to Sonnie and shoved her backpack in Sonnie’s lap. “I brought the book, Sonnie! Me and Daddy colored it.”
Sonnie’s face stretched in a beautiful smile and she held the backpack still as Macey looked through
it. “That’s exciting! Hurry. I want to see it!”
Lilah’s eyes narrowed. “So, this is the Sonnie I heard so much about?”
I gave her a look that said to fucking behave. I’d done enough damage to Sonnie for one day. I didn’t need my ex-wife compounding it. “This is Sonnie Stovall. She writes the Meep books that Macey loves so much. Sonnie, this is Lilah.”
Sonnie smiled up at Lilah. “It’s nice to meet you. You’ve got a wonderful daughter.”
“Uh-huh. Do you just hang out at security firms, or...?”
Sonnie kept her smile in place. “We’re having a barbecue. It’s perfect that you brought Macey over. She’s great company.”
My stomach clenched. Sonnie was so fucking nice. It was hard for anyone to remain kind when Lilah was around, but Sonnie was doing it with such ease. I’d hurt the sweetest woman. I wanted to beat the shit out of myself.
“You’re dating one of the guys here?”
Sonnie did her nervous giggle and her cheeks colored. “No. They’re helping me out with something. They’re great.”
I shifted closer to Sonnie and smiled at her when her eyes shifted to me. She looked away just as quickly, though.
Lilah made a sound that could’ve been an eye roll. “So, you write children’s books? That’s cute.”
Lauren was obviously growing sick of Lilah’s shit. “Cute is one way to put it. You should see her house. Children’s books pay well.”
Sonnie laughed. “What do you do, Lilah?”
“I’m a mother. That’s a full-time job in itself. I also work for a lawyer in town.” Lilah pursed her lips. “Do you have children?”
Sonnie shook her head. “I don’t. Maybe eventually.”
There was something sad on her face and my chest tightened for her. I wondered if she’d wanted kids with her ex. The same asshole who said he’d married her for her cookies.
“They say it’s dangerous to have kids after a certain age. You should try soon if you’re going to.”
I jerked back to the conversation and saw Sonnie’s face turn red. Anger fired through my blood and I swung around to my lovely ex-wife. “Lilah.”
Lauren was standing, proving her Mama Bear status yet again. Vince had even stepped forward. Sonnie just kept that same smile on her face and glanced down at Macey, who was still searching through her backpack for her book.
“What? I’m just saying.” Lilah sounded pleased with herself and that pissed me off even more.
“It’s okay. I’m twenty-nine. I think I’ve still got some time before I have to start worrying. Plus, there’s always adoption.” Sonnie shrugged. “Anyway, it was really nice to meet you.”
I laughed before I could help it. Sonnie had just politely dismissed Lilah. I tried to cover it with a cough, but it was useless. I watched as Macey crawled into Sonnie’s lap and shoved the book under her nose, happily ignorant of all the undercurrents floating around her.
Lauren moved closer to Lilah. “I’ll walk you out.”
Lilah tossed a glare at me and then flicked a look at Sonnie. “Cooper, walk me out.”
I bit back a snarl and took her elbow to get her out of there as fast as possible. I walked her to the front door, practically making her run to keep up with me, and then held open the door for her. “Goodbye, Lilah.”
“You like her.”
Fuck, yes, I did. Not that I could do anything about it. I’d fucked it up. Not to mention, Macey wasn’t ready. My body still went cold every time I thought about her hoping for Lilah and me to get back together.
“Wow. You like her a lot. She seems a little too Susie Homemaker for you. I didn’t realize you were into that whole goody-goody thing.”
I scowled at her, letting some of my real emotion towards her flash into my face. “What I am or am not into is not your concern, Lilah. I’ll see you tomorrow when you pick up Macey.”
Lilah pushed away from me and stormed out. I locked the door behind her, glad to see her go, and went back to the rec room to see Tucker bringing in a tray full of burgers.
Sonnie glanced at me and then looked back down at what Macey was showing her. Her shoulders were stiff again and there was a tension in her eyebrows that made her look sad.
I wanted to apologize for being rude to her earlier. She’d kept talking about Vince and I just got jealous. I was still jealous. She seemed to really like him. And even though I’d already made the choice to leave her alone, the idea of her cozying up to him made me want to break something. It made me act like an asshole.
Mercer stood up and stretched, his face weary as he did. He looked down at Lauren and his eyes softened for a moment before she looked up at him. Then, like normal, they hardened and he moved away from her. “I’m not going to pretend to be polite and let everyone go in front of me. I’m hungry.”
Lauren rolled her eyes. “You’re a grouch.”
Macey stayed at Sonnie’s side as Sonnie got in line behind Mercer with two plates. She picked up a hot dog and put it on one plate and then asked Macey something. They spoke back and forth as they went and, at the end, Macey had a plate of her favorite things. She sat next to Sonnie and grinned at her before taking a bite of her hotdog.
I watched them and swore. They weren’t making it easy on me to pretend like I didn’t want Sonnie.
Vince stood next to me and slapped me on the back. “She’s good with Macey, huh?”
I gritted my teeth. “Uh-huh.”
“She’s going to make someone a very happy man someday.” Vince watched my face turn angry and grinned. “You make it too easy, Coop.”
I watched as he sat next to Sonnie and they started talking. I’d lost my appetite. I wasn’t sure it’d ever come back if I had to keep watching Sonnie smile over at Vince.
I made myself a plate anyway and sat at the end of the picnic table, next to Lauren and across from Macey. Sonnie was actively avoiding my glances, but I could tell by the stiffness in her shoulders that she was aware of me. And didn’t that suck. My mere presence was making her uncomfortable. Feeling like an ass, I stood up, deciding that I didn’t want to punish her if she didn’t want to be around me. I’d do damage control later and make it right between us, but for the moment, I was retreating.
“Macey, I’ll be up front. Come and get me if you need anything, okay?” I knew she’d be fine with the guys, but I didn’t want Sonnie to feel like she had to watch her. “You can send her to me if you need to, Sonnie.”
I sat in the office area at the front and balanced my plate on my knee. Before I could even begin the tirade of self-bashing thought, Mercer joined me.
“There’s a reason we don’t get involved with the people we work for.” He sat across from me and shook his head. “We all do it, but it never seems to work out.”
“You say we like you’re human, too.”
Mercer, known for his stoicism, gave me a look. “I didn’t mean me. I’m too smart for that shit.”
“You’re too closed off for that shit.” I looked over at Lauren’s desk and raised an eyebrow. “What about getting involved with the people we work with?”
Mercer’s eyes went all squinty and he stood up. “You’re not my type.”
I laughed as he left me sitting alone again. Every time the possibility of the conversation of him and Lauren came up, he fled.
I sat there and thought about what to say to Sonnie until everyone else had finished their meal. When Tucker, Branson, and Vince went out the front to look at Tucker’s new truck, I walked back to the back. Lauren waved me over to where she sat with Macey and Mercer.
“Where’s Sonnie?”
“She’s in the bathroom. Talk to her when she comes out. Whatever you did to upset her, make it right.” Lauren stood up and pulled Mercer and Macey up with her. “We’ll be up front.”
I grunted and watched them go. Quickly rearranging my thoughts, I sorted out what I was going to say. As soon as the bathroom door opened and Sonnie stepped out, though, I was lost. I walked closer to her
and stopped in front of her.
“I’ve got to apologize.”
Sonnie’s cheeks burned, but she didn’t move from her spot. “Okay.”
I stared down at her and told myself to speak. I needed to apologize to make it better with her. Somehow, I found my mouth refusing to cooperate. Then my hands revolted and without any conscious thought from me, they were grabbing Sonnie and pulling her into my chest.
I swallowed the little gasp she released with my mouth and groaned as I felt her lips against mine again. I didn’t know what I was doing but I didn’t care in that moment.
I grabbed her sides and pulled her body flush against mine, the feel of her full breasts pressing against me driving me a little bit crazy with need. I licked the seam of her lips and she opened for me. Her fingers went to my hair and she tugged as I stroked her tongue with mine.
Just when I thought I could get lost in her forever, she pulled back. She pushed me away with both hands on my chest and then glared up at me.
“You’ve got a lot of nerve! You need to make up your mind, Cooper. I don’t like the game you’re playing.” She pushed me again and then stalked around me, headed towards the front.
I reached out and snagged her arm, pulling her back against my chest. She wiggled, but didn’t try to get away very hard. “I’m not playing any games. I want you. You know I want you. It just seems like there’s too much happening right now. I just wanted to apologize—but fuck if I can keep my hands off of you.”
“You’re going to have to try.” She pulled away again and stalked off, her ass swaying even more than usual in her haste.
I groaned and dropped my head back to stare at the ceiling, wondering when I’d become such a pussy. I wanted her. She wanted me. I should’ve just gone for it.
Chapter 16
Sonnie
In Vince’s truck, riding back to my house, I couldn’t help but marinate Cooper’s words. He wanted me. I thought he’d turned that switch off after that night in my office with Macey. It had sure seemed like it. He’d been colder and distant. Yet he was sure I knew he wanted me. I felt like a yo-yo, going back and forth in my feelings regarding him.
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