by Emjay Soren
"No, I didn’t want to make him nervous." I didn’t know if that was true or if I was still trying to get used to Chad and I being a topic of conversation in general. We had decided the night before to make our thing monogamous. My mind drifted to the conversation from early this morning when we were drifting to sleep in the boathouse curled around one another.
“It doesn’t have to mean anything more than the fact we are into each other, Carrie. If you don’t want titles I’m cool with it, but usually when you keep things monogamous, it means exclusive. I don’t give a shit about labels, just you, Carrie Girl.”
He kept telling me that and each time I liked it even more than the last. He was a persistent shit and just kept driving his point home that we should make things exclusive so that the girls at the show knew he was off limits and vice-versa with the guys.
After dealing with ho-bags one and two I could see his point.
“I’m cool with whatever Chad really.” I had said it, but it burned coming out. I was such a liar.
“Look Carrie…” He’d strummed his fingers along my ribs like I was his guitar and started singing to me. I was toast. “I’m crazy… for you baby…can’t you see…. And I’m wonderin’ … if you’re crazy…. Just like me…”
He had sung my favorite Royal Bliss song and I’d melted. The words were what I’d needed and being that I was a huge music fan, he just knew to get me on that level.
"He is your boyfriend." Celeste said, snapping me from said sexy boyfriend thoughts. She used a heavy emphasis on the boyfriend part. "He probably wants to see you."
I shrugged and wondered if she was right. I was not about to go all fangirl on him just because we found one another mutually hot. He was still Chad. If she was right it was too late, because the lights dimmed and an extremely loud bass guitar beat that was totally my brother’s style took my attention. Then I saw Chad and everything inside of me went to that girly, mushy, gooey place.
Chad was magnificent. His hair was down and fell to just the top of his shoulders. I almost forgot how beautiful he was when his hair wasn’t tucked beneath a bandana or hat. I was normally not attracted to long hair on men, I liked short close cut hair, but on Chad it was perfect. The way he was flushed, so consumed by the music, did something to me inside and I couldn’t take my eyes off him. I had told him the night of our first date that he was intense, but what I felt watching him on that stage was pure undiluted lust.
And then he started singing. They started with a cover of Quiet Riots ‘Cum On Feel The Noize”. They completely remade it and modernized it to their sound. It was faster, harder, and Chad rocked the vocals.
I knew on the fan base alone that they were good, but to see them live in their element, they were so in tune with one another it was perfection. They moved in sync proving that the years of dedication had created a natural choreography between them. They complimented one another and captivated an entire room packed to capacity.
Chad had an entirely different vibe when he was on stage. I watched as his ego slipped in place and the venue melted in his hand. He sang and looked out over the crowd, the look in his eyes had you believing he was singing to you, for you. He was so magnificent and meant to do this, he was that good.
By the end of the opening song Chad started introducing the band, each one of the guys giving a little riff or drum beat and Noah came in with an awesome bass line. After the introductions Chad joked some with the crowd, only making them love him more, and then started into an original song of theirs.
I watched Chad hold his mic and smile through his words. The song was highly sexual and I felt my skin heat when he slid his hand down his chest while singing about the feel of hands on his body. Then his eyes fell on me. He smiled as he sang and the slight dimples in his cheeks dug in and stood out on his perfect face. He was drenched after only the few songs when a large Polynesian man brought up a tray of beers for all the guys, dropping a water next to Shame’s drum kit.
I had heard Noah when he would write songs, I knew they sang songs about sex, drugs, and rock and roll like all the rock bands did. Listening to it all put together though, and watching Chad sing about sex, had me panting and seriously turned on. It was unfair that he be that beautiful, that desired by women who were screaming his name. His talent was no match for his heart though, but together they made him toxic to me, and all thoughts of being careful faded away. He made me desperate to be reckless with him.
“So while we’re taking a breath and getting ready to rock some more, let’s get to know a few. What do ya say, Becket?” Chad asked, and the crowd went nuts, screaming how they wanted to get to know Noah. Some of the women were asking to fuck him outright.
Noah laughed good naturedly. “Now, now, ladies, I’m here with a date this evening.” He said while clicking his tongue ring against his teeth driving them all the more crazy. Looking at Candy he winked and bit his lip and the crowd of women swooned.
“More for me.” Cal said into the mic and the girls went ballistic forgetting about Noah and his date for the night.
“What about you, Chad?” A woman in the front row yelled over the crowd, Chad’s mic picking it up. My heart was beating out of my chest as I wondered what he would say.
He laughed so god damn sexily I could have melted. “Nope, not tonight ladies.”
When an insane amount of boos erupted in the crowd Shame did a few kicks on the drums to rile the crowd back up.
“I know you love me, and I love you too, but I’m taken ladies.”
Holy fuck!
“Where is she?” Noah asked and laughed as he started looking in the crowd. I wanted to kill him and then hide.
The lights came down on me instantly and the entire crowd turned to stare at me. In that instant I wanted to run, I hated being judged and right now every woman in the bar was wondering what was so special about me. Good luck figuring it out, because I still had no clue why he wanted me when he had his pick. Looking at the hordes of women, I felt their stares as they plotted my death.
“There she is.” Chad said, his voice full of promise and it made me forget everything for a split second. “Damn boys, ain’t I one lucky fucker?” He asked and the men in the crowd agreed making me feel awesome.
I laughed trying to find the humor in the situation. I was finding it a bit hard, these bitches were crazy and now I was on their radar.
“Hi, baby.” He said with a wink and I melted. I mean, who wouldn’t? Besides, he was hot. All the women around me now hated me even more.
“Hi.” I said, barely loud enough to be heard. Luckily my girls were jumping up and down in excitement for me.
He laughed again and looked back at the band. “Should I serenade my girl?”
The entire place went crazy and even the women wanted to see Chad Blake serenade me. “I guess that’s a yes.” He said and started playing the opening tune to ‘Saving Me’ by Nickleback.
“I have it on good authority that my girl loves this song, it’s not her favorite, but that one isn’t appropriate for our show.” He looked at me and winked again. “So as serenades go, it’s not the romantic type, but I still get awesome boyfriend points.” And with that he started singing me my song.
I was lost watching him sing for me. He pulled me into that place that he had me in last night. There was no crowd and no dad threatening to shatter my happiness; no drugged out brother or ‘my boyfriend won’t kiss me’ fears. It was me and Chad, and I was lost in him entirely.
‘Say it for me-
Say it to me-
I’ll leave this life behind me-
Say it if it’s worth saving me.
His eyes drilled into me when he sang that particular line about leaving this life behind him. When he sang that part he looked out at all his horny female fans before dropping that gaze back on me. It was the only time in the entire song that his eyes left mine. I wanted to know if he meant anything by it, but considering this song wasn’t his selection I figured I was reading too
much into it.
It also made his serenade last night all the more charming. God, I was losing myself to him and it had only been just over a week since our first date. I was on my own here, Noah couldn’t protect me from falling for a known playboy and that was exactly what I was doing. I had always crushed on Chad for no other reason than he was Chad Blake and sexy to the extreme. Now he was mine and there were emotions and fears to deal with.
After the serenade they resumed the high energy vibe that came with their original music. Those songs had the women in Aloha House going crazy. I didn’t know what to do with the overwhelming jealousy. I wanted to harm these women, pull their hair through their assholes, or something just as painful and graphic, to get them to back off. I was so claiming him as mine and I now understood exactly why he said calling us an item would matter.
I wanted his mouth on mine, his hands on me. I wanted to hear his voice, a voice capable of making my skin crawl in the most divine way, whispering things in my ear. I sat mesmerized listening to him sing, his voice so sexy, he called on every sense I had and held me captive waiting for more. Everything about him screamed sex, and that made everything in me want to scream ‘Ok!’ I wanted to know why he would call me his, sing to me and make me feel so wanted, and then refrain from putting his mouth to mine. I didn’t know if I was giving him a ‘back off’ vibe, but I was desperate to know what he tasted like.
At the end of the concert I rushed outside for air. The night had come and the air was thick, but I swear I could smell him around me. Instead when I turned, I found Celeste, Candy and Cassa all freaked because I had rushed out.
"What is wrong with you? Did you even tell him how good he was?" Celeste demanded, her hand on her hip. I knew she was right, my running probably looked horrible, but the tone of her voice made me flinch. It was possessive and I was sick of the fangirls ogling what I wanted.
“Calm down cheerleader.” Candy said and stepped up close. “You okay? Need me to get Noah sweetie?” Candy was the only person who had an idea of the past Noah and I had suffered and she knew that emotional moments tended to make me close in on myself. She saw it immediately and was ready to get Noah out here to get me on level.
"I needed air." I gasped and looked at Candy… she was my very best friend. "That was unbelievable...and my reaction..."
“Is totally normal, Carrie. I am only fucking Noah, nothing like what you and Chad are doing, and even I get worked up when I see him jam.” Her tone was comforting, but the look of longing in her eyes was noticeable for just an instant.
"I think I need to kiss him, Candy, not want, but need."
"Then kiss him!" Celeste all but snarled. There was no mistake in her tone this time. She was totally mad.
Candy looked at me, fully aware of the situation, then turned to Celeste using the same tone. "She hasn’t kissed him yet. They were going slow. That’s why she ran out."
Celeste looked like the wind had been knocked out of her. Was it so insane? What was wrong with slow, with establishing a good thing? And if that was the reason, then why was I just as pissed for not having kissed Chad as she was? It’s not like we haven’t had ample opportunity.
Holy fuck! Maybe I did need Noah to enlighten me some more. I was sexually frustrated by Chad and had yet to experience any of the fun sex parts! I hadn’t felt like there was a huge problem, but after Noah’s jokes and the look on Celeste’s face, maybe there was.
"You’re kidding me right?" She snickered.
“Oh, so help me, Celeste, I will cut you if you fuck with Carrie about this.” Candy shot back.
Celeste glared at Candy, but ignored her. I saw Chad come out the front doors, looking for me no doubt. The guys were with him so it only made my warring emotions more difficult. "I want to, but I don’t know how to even attempt it." I wanted to talk to Noah. He would know if I would be fooling myself even thinking that Chad would want to kiss me, and he really was the best person to talk me down.
"Carrie, he is your boyfriend… it’s part of the territory.” Celeste said, but I still started biting my thumbnail nervously. She rolled her eyes and groaned. “I dare you right now to kiss him!" She said as if the old elementary game would get me.
Of course, I’m not one to pass up a dare.
I walked toward Chad and the smile he gave me was sexy, warm and meant completely for me. He was asking, without words, if I approved. He was about to find out. I glared at Noah in true sisterly fashion. Before I had hoped he would tell me what to do, now I wanted him to turn his head.
"What did ya think baby?" Chad asked. It may be the mushy girl in me, but I love it when he calls me baby.
"Amazing." I could hear the wonder and excitement in my voice. His responding smile of perfectly white teeth and deep dimples did me in. "It makes me want to kiss you."
He smiled and his eyes darkened as they zoned in on me. He was all rock star with a deadly swagger as he stepped forward. “Really?” He said low enough for only me to hear, his voice husky and full of promise. He wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me in tight to him. “That good, huh?” He asked, giving me his ‘fuck yeah’ smile.
“Yeah…” I breathed the words because I had lost my voice and he was so close that I would just a have to lean in a bit……
"I’ll sing to the sky, a dog, a car, I don’t care babe, as long as it means I can kiss you." I was close enough now that I could feel his warm skin, his arms strong and so capable of holding me. His other hand clasped my neck and held my head as he leaned in.
Mouth to mouth about to kiss, I had to tell him. "I was dared to kiss you, but only because I didn’t know how to ask you to kiss me."
He looked at me and smiled before turning his head toward my group of girlfriends who were now standing with his band mates and a few other friends. It had become a scene when Celeste yelled "Kiss!" And everyone else began chanting. Candy and Noah were the exception. Noah just rolled his eyes and slapped Candy’s ass.
Chad looked back at me, possessive eyes locking on mine and yelled to our friends. "Should I kiss my girl?"
He was so close I couldn’t think so I nodded in response as the rest of our group gave a loud “Yes!”
"All you ever have to do is ask, babe." His lips met mine before I could respond. His mouth was smooth and soft and his lips like satin and I wanted the kiss to last forever. The hoots and hollers from our friends were a distant buzz to the roar of Chad in my mouth. When our tongues met for the first time I could have melted at his feet, but I held on waiting for more. He tasted like beer and breath mints and there was something completely erotic about it. The same mouth that sang to the rafters and made a crowd roar in excitement made me weak and greedy and needy with such a gentle lick.
He didn’t overpower me or drown me in tongue. He sucked on my lips before sliding his tongue along mine again. He could seriously kiss, and though I had no breath, I still groaned when he stopped.
Chad stayed close and peppered my lips with a couple of chaste kisses before pulling me in for a hug. "Jesus, my new reason for singing is more of that, Carrie."
"I don’t need singing. From now on that can be an all day, every day kind of thing.”
He laughed and held me close, not caring that I had made a scene or that his friends were teasing him. And then like he was reading my thoughts he bent and whispered in my ear, "You’re mine, Carrie. I could give a shit what they say." And I believed him.
*
After the guys had all their gear loaded, we decided to head over to a friend of the guys, named Gavin. I agreed to go along and held Chad’s hand as we walked to my car. “Did you drive your truck?” I asked when he walked me to my used, but awesome and cute Honda.
“Nope, you’re chauffeuring me tonight.” He took my keys from me, pressed the unlock button on my FOB and guided me to the passenger side.
“I thought I was chauffeuring tonight.” I said with a smile, though I didn’t really care who drove.
“Ok, I lied. I’m d
riving you in your car.” He was so demanding and ready to take charge. I was ok with that and I giggled like a dumb girly girl. “Love that sound.” He said and then leaned in kissing me square on the lips.
Yay!
I got in the car and buckled the seat belt while Chad walked around to the driver side. He was sexy even in the most mundane things, like getting in a car, walking, breathing…
He got us on the road and then took my hand in his, bringing it to his mouth and kissing our linked fingers. When he did those sweet little things, I swear to God, my heart stopped.
“You’re lucky. I never let anyone drive my car.” I told him. It was true, I hated people messing with my mirrors and adjusting the seat and the heater and the radio. I was all about habit and not big on change. Seeing Chad in my car after he just readjusted everything spoke volumes about how deep I was into him.
“Well, I kind of planned it. Regardless if you drove or I drove, I was leaving that show with you.”
“Why?” I don’t know why I cared, I was truly happy we were in the car alone together, able to talk. It all felt so surreal. Especially after I had shared him all night with crazed fangirls and then the entire bar witnessing our first kiss, I was desperate for some alone time with him.
“Because I wasn’t going to go another night without throwing down my moves and getting you to kiss me.” He winked again. He had to know that makes me totally crazy, in the best sort of way.
“You sound relieved. Have you been holding back, Chad?” I was joking and he laughed, but I wanted the answer to that about as much as I wanted my next breath.
He gave me a strange look, his brows drawn in and his head cocked to the side. “You really never got it did you?”