by Maya Hughes
“Are you happy?” he repeated.
“Are you?”
“No. Not even a little bit. I am completely lost without you, Rachel.”
“I doubt that, Killian. You got everything you wanted, right? Managed to stick it to Rhys. Got your company. Got to use me along the way. You should be incredibly happy.” The anger seeped back into my voice, even though I tried to keep it at bay.
“I apologized to Rhys.” He chuckled at my wide-eyed expression. “Trust me, it wasn’t easy. I have the literal scar to prove it,” he said, pushing the hair off his forehead. A red line sliced across his forehead just above his right eyebrow. I winced. It must have been painful.
“I’m sure it wasn’t easy for you.” Nervous energy flowed through me. I needed to move. “Can we walk now? I need to give you your tour.” I stood and started walking. His heavy footfalls landed behind me.
We got to the exhibit and I showed them my badge and we were allowed back in. I went through all the items I’d memorized, skipping over the few we’d seen last night. He listened to every word, but other than a sparing glance at what I described, he didn’t look at anything in the cases. His eyes were glued to mine.
As much as I wanted to pretend him being around me didn’t affect me, it did. His gravitational pull was something I’d never be able to resist. And I didn’t want to. I’d gone on exactly one date since leaving and I didn’t even make it until dessert. I felt more in the hour I walked with him mainly in silence, than I had in almost four months away from him. But how could I trust that whatever was driving him, that anger and rage wouldn’t come back?
36
KILLIAN
I was losing her. Not that I’d had her, but I could tell her doubts were eating at her, gnawing at her. I knew what that did to you. How it could make you miss the things right in front of you.
We made it to the end of the exhibit and I knew my time was almost up.
“I have something to show you,” I said, reaching for her hand. She let me take it and I took that as a good sign. I led her to a garden just outside the doors of the exhibit. Peonies were everywhere.
“Your suggestion?” I asked. Her cheeks pinked up a bit.
“How did you know?” I raised my eyebrow and she laughed. “Yeah, I guess they’re kind of my thing.”
“They are,” I said, pulling out a chair for her. She took a seat.
“I have something for you.” I slid the thick envelope across the table.
“What is this?” she asked, picking it up and opening it. My palms were sweaty and I rubbed them on my pants.
As she read through the papers, her eyes got wide. She flipped through more than half before staring up at me.
“What? You’re giving me your company? But…but…”
“I own it outright as of a few months ago. It’s all mine. Everything I’ve ever worked for. Everything I’ve ever destroyed to get to this point, but I realize now, that it doesn’t matter. None of that matters, if I don’t have you. I’m giving it to you. You can do whatever you want with it.”
“Killian…” She shook her head. It wasn’t working. Desperation pushed me forward.
“You can sell it off. Use the money to do charity work here with your mom. Or give it all to Thayer. He’s gotten pretty good at giving all his money away.”
“You’d really be okay with me giving all this money to Rhys? Selling off the company you’ve worked so hard to build.”
“If you say you’ll stay with me. That you’ll give me another chance, I’d let you sell my company a hundred times.”
“I can’t do that,” she said, her hands wrapped tightly around the stack of paper. My heart sank. I felt like I was dropping fast, drowning under my own ambitions. I’d worked so hard and ended up losing the one thing I ever truly wanted.
“I can’t sell it off. I can’t do this.” She stood from the chair and I jumped up and wrapped my arms around her.
“I can’t do it without you, Rachel. I promised your mom that if you said no today, that I’d be able to walk away. That I would give you the space you needed, but I can’t promise that.” I held her face in my hands. “I can’t promise that because I will do anything it takes to get you to believe me. To make you understand how much you mean to me.”
“Killian, don’t,” she said, trying to pull away from me. Desperation tightened my chest and I pressed my lips to hers. She put her hands on my chest. At first, I thought she was going to push me away and I steeled myself for that rejection, but she wound her hands around the fabric of my shirt and pulled me closer.
The kiss morphed and deepened as she parted her lips. She held onto me and I held on even tighter to her. I needed her more than I’d ever needed anything in my life.
We sat there for hours and I spilled it all. Everything about my mom and my dad. About Rhys and what happened after she left. The glare of the setting sun nearly blinded me before she covered my hand with hers.
“I can’t sell your company, Killian,” she said, taking her hand back and putting it in her lap. My heart sunk. It wasn’t enough. I wasn’t enough.
“I can do far more good if the company is still up and running and generating revenue. Plus, it’s a tax write off,” she said, glancing up at me with a small smile. I lifted her out of the seat, my arms wrapped around her, kissing her lips hard. My lifeline.
“I promise you won’t regret it. You won’t and every day I’ll prove to you, just how good I can be to you.”
“I’m going to hold you to that, Killian. Or else I’ll send my mom and Dahlia after you.”
I shuddered, imagining the two of them coming after me.
“You wouldn’t be so devious.”
“I learned from the best,” she said, pressing her lips against mine. Nipping my lip. I growled and threaded my hand into her hair, crushing her to me.
She pushed me back, keeping her arms around my neck.
“You know you have to meet my parents now, right?”
I groaned.
“I already had a long talk with your mom,” I said, rubbing my hand across my forehead.
“You did? When?” she asked, looking surprised.
“When she came to my room last night and threatened to castrate me if I didn’t give you what you needed.”
“She did?”
“I have no doubt in my mind that between her and Dahlia, they wouldn’t make good on that promise.”
She laughed. I loved hearing her laugh.
“I think you’re completely right. Good call on not pissing those two off.”
“I thought so.”
“Now what?” she said, glancing up at me, biting her bottom lip.
37
RACHEL
We crept into the backyard, trying to stifle our laughter. I climbed the rungs to my treehouse with Killian’s hands missing the rungs of the ladder and ending up along my legs the whole way. He nearly made me fall at least twice.
“Would you quit it, before I fall off this ladder and end up killing us both.”
“I’m not the one climbing up a ladder in a skirt wearing a thong,” he said, licking his lips.
We made it to the top of the ladder and I crawled inside, flicking on a light. Killian stalked toward me on all fours looking even more predatory than he usually did. I laughed when he grabbed my ankle and tugged me down toward him. My skirt slid up against my waist. He pressed his body against mine, his hard cock rubbing against me through my panties.
“I’ve missed you,” he growled, his lips on mine.
“I missed you too,” I said, wrapping my arms around his neck and running my fingers through his hair.
“He’s missed you,” he said, grinding himself against me. Pleasure rolled over my body and I let it wash over me. I lifted my hips as Killian’s hands slid over my ass, peeling my panties off.
“Looks like she’s missed me too,” he said, pushing his fingers inside of me. I moaned, unable to hold it back as he pumped his fingers inside of me.
My thighs trembled, when he took his fingers out and knelt in front of me, lifting my legs up and sliding into me.
“Fuck,” he bit out as he bottomed out in me. My gasps and his groans were the only sounds that filled my treehouse as we both raced toward the white-hot orgasm we felt building.
He came down, his hips still going, and ran his hand over the side of my face.
I cried out as I inched closer and closer to the blinding pleasure that stole my breath away.
“Did you follow my rule, sweetheart?” He asked, reaching between us and tapping on my clit. My thighs trembled as my cheeks got even more flushed.
“Please Killian,” I begged, but he slowed his thrusts and ground himself against me. My eyes rolled back in my head.
“Did you follow my rule?”
“Yes,” I shouted. I’d do anything for the orgasm just out of reach. He grinned and bit the spot on my neck that set me off, while he pounded into me, pushing me along the floor along with the whole nest. I screamed so loud it would be a wonder if he weren’t deaf.
He followed me over, tumbling into his own body shattering orgasm right after me. I felt him expand inside of me and it sent me into my second climax, so hard my toes curled and everything winked in and out.
We laid there, panting and sweaty, grinning at one another like two idiots. He threw one of the blankets over the two of us and wrapped himself around me.
“I love you, sweetheart.”
“I know,” I said, laughing as he nipped at my neck. “I love you too.”
Our heads popped up when the trapdoor flew open and my mom’s head popped up. I buried my head in Killian’s shoulder.
“What in the hell? I thought you were being murdered up here, Rachel!”
“Sorry, Mom. Killian was just giving me the last little bit of his pitch on why I should take him back.” I giggled with my lips pressed against Killian’s neck.
“I wouldn’t say little,” Killian teased. I glanced over my shoulder at my mom, who rolled her eyes.
“I’m glad to see you two have made up. Now hurry up and get dressed, your father will be home soon.” She closed the door behind her.
“Oh shit,” Killian said, looking at me with fear in his eyes. “I’ve never met a girl’s dad before.”
I laughed and kissed him again, my heart lighter than it had been for as long as I could remember. I’d stepped into the jaws of the lion and made it out the other side. This man had taught me more about myself than I ever thought I could learn. I brushed his hair back from his forehead and stared into his eyes. He wrapped his arms around me and nipped at my neck. This should be interesting.
Epilogue
Five months later
Frankie
I checked the tests for the fifth time in five minutes, all fifteen of them. Really? Not even one giving me a little hope that maybe it was a mistake? They all blared big, loud, unmistakable smiley faces, plus signs, double lines, PREGNANT. That was it. I tried to get my breathing under control, but it wasn't working. How in the hell did that happen? I mean, I know how it happened, but really?
I sat perched on my bathtub, running my hands through my hair and down over my face. The tapping of my nails along the porcelain bathtub and my thundering heartbeat were the only sounds in the room. One night. One crazy night where I let my guard down and got a little tipsy, and then this. The first time I let my guard down, and then bam, knocked up. Of course, this would happen to me. Like a cosmic joke.
I grabbed my phone from the counter, my hands trembling.
Me: Sash, I'm pregnant
Sasha: Holy shit! Seriously?!
Me: Yes
Sasha: Good job, way to work your way through every high school cliché and you've been out for almost a decade.
Me: I hate you
Sasha: How are you doing?
Me: I'm freaking out.
Sasha: It's John's, right?
Me: Yes, it's John's. How many guys do you think I'm sleeping with?
Sasha: I don't know, just checking...
Me: You're no help. I'm sorry I even said anything.
Sasha: I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, and you know I'll be there if you need anything.
Me: A time machine?
Sasha: All out of the plutonium I need to run mine...
Me: What do I do now?
Sasha: Have John's baby?
Me: I’m so screwed
Grim - Then
My palms were so damn sweaty. It was a wonder I could keep a grip on a football at all, but out on the field I was never that nervous. On the field, I could run for days, and it never got any less exciting. This was a completely different animal.
My Adam's apple bobbed up and down, and my throat tightened.
'Hey, Grim,' 'great game,' 'nice catch' comments are thrown my way, but I keep walking down the hall. People moved out of my way. Maybe they could sense I wasn’t in the mood for a rehash of last night’s game.
She was right there. Killian's back was to me, and he left when I was only steps away. Perfect timing. He'd kill me if he knew I was doing this. Killian acted like he hadn't slept his way through half the cheerleaders in the school. He didn’t seem to care about keeping his head down to keep his scholarship, like I did. I wasn’t going to screw around and mess things up for a girl, not just any girl anyway. Those other girls were fine, but they weren't her.
She slammed her locker closed, and I rushed those last few steps, my sneakers screeching on the tile floor.
"Hey, Frankie," I said, trying my best to keep my voice even.
"Hey, Grim." She had her hair in a long braid over her shoulder. The smile she gave me made me feel like I'd just gotten my first interception of the game. The books in her arms wobbled and I grabbed the stack. "I've got them." She reached for them, but I held them back.
"It's fine. I've got them. I'm heading this way. I can walk you to class." The flow of students moved around us so we were like two pebbles in a river as I walked toward her classroom. We were in our own little world, surrounded by everyone else.
"Cool, thanks!" She adjusted her bag on her shoulder and fell in step beside me. I glanced over at her t-shirt. It was covered in another cast of anime characters I'd never seen before. Her wardrobe must have been exclusively anime and comic book characters because I'd never seen her in anything else. “What did you end up getting for your half of the project?”
“An A, which I have to say is because of you.”
“No, it’s not. You did a great job. I mean what is up with Health class having a project anyway? I definitely learned way more about herpes than I ever wanted, but I’m glad we both got good grades.” She blushed and fiddled with the straps of her bag. Researching the background and spread of herpes was only something I looked forward to because I got to spend a few days every week, hanging out with Frankie.
She’d mainly been Killian’s friend, and we’d seen each other, but we’d never had a lot of time to talk. Never spent hours together huddled in the library trying to gross one another out. She was different. Not like a lot of the other girls in the school. I liked that.
We moved through the halls in silence. Locker doors slammed shut and people high-fived me along the way. I struggled to find the words. The science wing was up ahead. Now or never. I took a deep breath as we got closer to her classroom door. Advanced Placement physics.
"Would you want to go to the Ancients’ dance with me? If you don't already have a date." I rushed out in one breath, hedging, so I didn’t make myself sound like a moron. She bounced on the balls of her feet, nearly eye level with me. I could look her in the eye without ducking my head. I liked that. I knew when I kissed her, I wouldn't get a cramp in my neck. And I couldn't wait to see how she tasted.
"Sure. That would be great." I let out a breath and my cheeks hurt from smiling. "I can meet you and Kill there. What time were you thinking?" My smile faltered. She thought this was a group thing.
"No, not me and Kill. Just me and you." Her
eyebrows furrowed and maybe this was a mistake.
"Oh...OH! Like a date?" Her eyes widened and her cheeks pinked up. She ducked her head, tugging on her t-shirt. Suddenly, her sneakers were the most interesting thing in the hall as she rocked back on her heels and tapped the toes together. I liked that I could do that to her. Get her a little flustered. She peeked up at me and smiled before glancing away again. I clenched my hands at my side to keep from wrapping my fist around her braid and kissing her right then and there.
"Like a date." I tipped her chin up with my finger and caught her eye. The end zone in view, my heart hammered while I waited for the pass.
"Sure, Grim. I'd like that a lot. Thanks for asking." Touchdown!
"I'll pick you up at seven."
"I'll see you at seven for the dance," she parroted back. She peered over at me as I backed up down the hall, and she stepped into the doorway of her class. I spun to head to the other side of the building to my next class. I'd have to hustle before the bell.
"Uh, Grim?" she called after me.
I whipped back around. "Yeah?"
"I'm going to need my books," she said, chuckling. I glanced down. My arm was still wrapped around her books.
"Sorry, here you go." I handed them off and slunk back down the hall. Real smooth...
The rest of the week crawled by. The only time my mind didn't wander to Frankie was during the game at the end of the week. We crushed the other team. Sent them home with their tails between their legs. She texted me her address. After fifteen tries and what seemed like thirty YouTube videos, I finally got my tie done. My anxiety skyrocketed as I drove down her street.
The houses that lined the street all had names on them on big brass plates affixed to tall brick columns outside the high wrought-iron fences that surrounded them. Osborne House. Great Wrigley. Hunting Hill. The elevated circular driveways could barely be seen from the street with the massive gates that wrapped around the whole property. I knew she wasn't a scholarship kid, but this was another level. There wasn't anyone walking on the street, or I'm sure my knocking engine would have gotten a few looks.