by Lisa Kron
KAYLA: Well . . . What do you do in the class?
TESSA: We . . . read newspapers and, like, Time magazine and . . .
ELLEN (Regarding a photocopied page from the folder): The president’s State of the Union.
TESSA: Yeah.
KAYLA (Taking it from Ellen and looking it over): Oh yeah.
ELLEN: Remember that?
KAYLA: Oh yeah.
ELLEN: —In which he informed us that no other country likes freedom or dignity. We’re the only ones. God chose us. We’re just automatically good, no matter what we do.
TESSA: Yeah.
KAYLA: Okay, so you read these things and then do you . . . write papers? Have discussions? Or . . . ?
(Tessa shrugs.)
DANNY: You know what, Tessa?
TESSA: What?
DANNY: Those other kids are full of shit.
KAYLA: Danny . . .
DANNY (Phony whispering to Tessa): Oops. I’m not supposed to say the shit word.
TESSA: It’s just that I don’t know the right ways to talk about politics, and other kids do.
DANNY: I can guarantee you those other kids don’t know as much as you think they do.
TESSA: Really?
DANNY: Guarantee.
ELLEN: Tessa. I get told all the time to keep my opinions to myself—
TESSA: You do?
ELLEN: Yes. And I ignore it. Just ask Laurie. There is no right way to talk about politics!
TESSA: I just . . . I just can’t understand why everyone is so against him.
ELLEN: Against who?
TESSA: President Bush.
(Beat.)
ELLEN (Doing her very best to be nonjudgmental): Oh.
TESSA: I mean . . . in Corbin, on 9/11, we were all so scared. The thing that got me the most was that the teachers were crying, which, I was just like . . . I was just like, “Oh my God!” I was just . . . praying and praying and praying . . . And I remember the teachers explained to us, because we were like, “Why is this happening? Why are the terrorists attacking us?” And they told us: “No reason except they hate us.” Just like you said, Ellen, they hate us because of our freedoms. So, when I got to DC I was like, Oh my God. This is where terrorists blew up the Pentagon. People died here on 9/11. I can’t imagine how it felt to be there that day. But I do know if I had been there I would be like, “Thank you, President Bush! Thank you for protecting us!” And last week I said that in class. And people . . . just went crazy. Saying about how I’m stupid and I don’t know anything about politics, so . . . (Shrugging) It’s okay. I don’t have to talk in class anymore.
ELLEN: That is . . . inexcusable.
(A beat. Then:)
But I think maybe you misunderstood me a little bit, Tessa. I’m actually not sure George Bush is protecting us. What I was meaning to say, actually, is that he kind of manipulated people after 9/11 to make them feel scared and angry.
KAYLA: Ellen . . .
ELLEN: What?
KAYLA (Attempting to lightly shift the conversation): Just . . .
ELLEN: What??
TESSA: Now people are upset.
ELLEN: We’re not upset, Tessa.
KAYLA: You haven’t made anyone upset, Tessa.
KAYLA (Still light): Ellen just always has to make her point.
ELLEN: I’m responding to her, Kayla. We’re having a conversation.
TESSA: No, see, I shouldn’t have talked about that.
ELLEN: Tessa, we’re interested in what you think.
KAYLA: We’re fine, Tessa. You did not upset us.
TESSA: Y’all think I’m stupid.
DANNY: Nope. That’s wrong.
ELLEN: We absolutely do not! I am very interested in what you were saying.
KAYLA: Tessa, you are amazing, and we adore you.
LAURIE: Oh my God, Tessa. (Fierce) We do not think you’re stupid. And . . . I think that . . . actually you described something I feel a lot.
TESSA: I did?
LAURIE: Yeah . . . (Keeping it light and about Tessa, though she doesn’t often talk about this) I work down near Ground Zero // and—
TESSA: You do?
LAURIE: Yeah. Yeah, the restaurant where I work is down there, // and—
TESSA (Wide-eyed, awed): Were you there on 9/11?
LAURIE: I was. Yeah. And . . . I’ve felt scared and angry . . . a lot . . . since then. And . . . yeah, I don’t feel like it’s George Bush making me feel that way. So, yeah. I really . . . I can really appreciate what you said.
ELLEN: Oh, Laurie, that’s not what I meant. I wasn’t talking about regular fear.
LAURIE: What’s regular fear?
ELLEN: It’s . . . You know what I mean. Laurie, come on, you know what I mean.
(Judy’s cell phone rings.)
JUDY: Shit! Where’s my phone?
(Everyone starts to look for the phone.)
KAYLA: Is it . . .?
ELLEN: I don’t know.
JUDY (Finds it): Hello? . . . We’re taking the nine o’clock. // Tessa, get your stuff ready.
ELLEN: Is it Larry?
TESSA: But she was // telling—
JUDY: Tessa, please.
(Tessa goes to get her stuff.)
(Back into the phone) Yes, I’m here. No, yes, // we can make it.
ELLEN: What’s happening?
JUDY (Hangs up): Okay, where’s my satchel?
ELLEN: You’re leaving?
JUDY: Now Larry needs to meet the earlier train.
ELLEN: Is everything // okay?
JUDY: Satchel.
ELLEN: I think it’s in the bedroom.
(Judy exits.)
(To Laurie) What’s going on? (Laurie shrugs— nothing) I just wanted to respond to what she said and not patronize her.
(Tessa returns, studying a framed photo.)
KAYLA: Hey, what have you got there?
TESSA (Caught): Oh . . .
KAYLA: That’s our wedding picture.
TESSA: It is?
(Kayla nods. Tessa again studies the picture.)
Y’all got married in a church.
KAYLA: We did.
(Tessa examines the photo. Then, finally:)
TESSA: I like your dress.
KAYLA: Thanks.
JUDY (Reentering, to Tessa): Ready?
TESSA: Wait. (To Ellen and Danny) Where’s y’all’s wedding picture?
JUDY: Tessa—
TESSA: One minute. (To Ellen and Danny) I wanna see y’all’s wedding picture.
ELLEN: We’re not married, Tessa.
TESSA (She looks at Ellen and Danny, then at Kayla and Laurie): Y’all are married and they’re not?
LAURIE: Yep.
TESSA: How come they’re not married?
(Beat.)
LAURIE: You have to ask them.
TESSA: Don’t you want to marry her, Danny?
DANNY: Depends how big her dowry is.
TESSA: Ellen, don’t you love Danny?
ELLEN: I do.
TESSA (Thoroughly confused): Then why aren’t you two married?
ELLEN (Searching for an appropriate, instructive response): It’s . . . It’s a big . . . question . . .
JUDY: Not everybody wants to get married, Tessa. Sometimes there are other ways people choose to be together.
TESSA: Oh . . . Like you and Larry?
DANNY (Falling over): Whoa, Tessa! You’re killing us here!
TESSA: What???
KAYLA: Oh, honey!
JUDY: It’s time to go. // We have to go.
ELLEN: Yes. Run. (Hugging Judy) You’re going to be fine.
(Kayla and Laurie help Tessa with her coat and backpack.)
KAYLA: We’re going to see you again really soon.
LAURIE: You have to come back and see Harry Potter with me.
TESSA: Okay. If I can.
LAURIE: What do you mean, if you can! You better come back, you stinker.
KAYLA: Okay, you gotta go. Scoot.
ELLEN: You’ve
got plenty of time, Judy. You’re going to be fine.
DANNY: Judy, we’ll talk about another tutoring session, okay?
JUDY: Oh. Yeah. Thank you, Danny.
DANNY: Not a problem. You will be getting my bill. And it will be exorbitant.
ALL: Bye. Bye. Safe home.
KAYLA (Seeing the T-shirt bag, handing it to Judy): Oh. Judy, don’t forget this.
JUDY: What? Oh. Yeah.
(Judy and Tessa exit.)
ELLEN (Closing the door after them. Turning back to the group): Okay then.
(Everyone starts to clear the dishes.)
No, leave ’em. Leave ’em. I’ll do ’em later. Coffee and dessert?
LAURIE: Oh. I’m tired. I think I’m probably going to go down.
ELLEN: Oh. Really?
LAURIE: Yeah.
KAYLA: Yeah. I’m tired, too.
ELLEN: Oh.
KAYLA: Yeah.
LAURIE: You can stay if you want.
KAYLA: No, no, I’ll come down with you.
ELLEN: Oh. Okay. Well . . . Hey, when are we seeing each other again?
KAYLA: Aren’t we having dinner tomorrow?
ELLEN: Oh. Oh. Shit! I . . . I can’t.
KAYLA: Oh.
ELLEN: I’m on that panel at the New School.
KAYLA: Oh right. Right. I should come to that.
ELLEN: Oh you don’t have to. I mean, I’d love to have you there, but you’ve heard it all before.
KAYLA: I might like to hear the other people.
ELLEN: Oh, of course. Duh. Yes. Come. You should come.
(Beat.)
Listen, I’m sorry tonight wasn’t . . . you know . . . that it was . . . you know. Laurie—
LAURIE: What?
ELLEN: I don’t know.
(Laurie gives a shrug which says she’s fine. Nothing to talk about. She turns to leave.)
I’m sorry.
LAURIE: For what?
ELLEN: I don’t know, but you’re mad at me.
LAURIE: I’m not. I’m fine.
ELLEN: Okay.
LAURIE: I’m not mad.
ELLEN: Okay.
LAURIE: I’m just . . . you know.
(She shrugs, turns to go, then:)
By the way . . . what is, um . . . what is regular fear?
ELLEN (Not immediately registering the reference): What? Oh. I don’t know. Nothing. It was a bad word choice.
LAURIE (Working against her rage to stay cool and light): Yeah. ’Cause . . . “regular”— Nothing felt regular if you were down there that day.
ELLEN: No, of course not.
LAURIE: And . . . just so you know, I actually do feel afraid and angry, a lot of the time . . . so . . .
ELLEN: Of course. Laurie. Of course. I totally understand. I mean, come on, I’m angry all the time.
LAURIE (Doing her best to shrug it off and keep it light): Okay. Never mind.
ELLEN (Sincerely wanting to know): Laurie, what? Tell me.
(No response.)
Laurie, I really do understand.
LAURIE: Well, you don’t, actually, because you weren’t here; you were off with your girlfriend // you know—okay, doesn’t matter. You weren’t here.
LAURIE: Okay, okay, it’s not a big deal, I was just pointing out that it’s—it was different if you were here. It was different for people who were down there. That’s . . . that’s all I was saying.
ELLEN: I do know that, Laurie. I do know that’s true.
LAURIE: Yeah. I mean . . . and, anyway, you know, I’m just not sure you’re the ethical standard // bearer.
LAURIE: What, okay, I know we’re all supposed to be fine with . . . all of it . . . and that’s how it is, and it pisses me off and okay, okay, okay. I get it. I’m fine. // I’m fine. I’m fine.
KAYLA: Laurie . . . // Laurie . . . !
ELLEN: No, no, no. It’s okay. It’s a complicated situation . . . that I’m in. And she gets to have her feelings about it. Laurie, I’m sorry I used that term, it was dismissive, and it was . . . stupid. And, truly, Laurie, I’m sorry.
(Laurie grabs Ellen’s shoulders and slow-motion shakes her—then accepts a hug from Ellen, then fiercely hugs her back.)
DANNY: A dinner plan?
ELLEN: Oh, right.
KAYLA: Right. Right.
KAYLA: Can you do Thursday?
ELLEN: Totally.
KAYLA (To Laurie): Honey?
LAURIE: Yeah.
DANNY: Thursday, Thursday—Ooh. I’m going to have to have my people call your people on that.
DANNY: I’m just not sure. I think I’m back from Switzerland by then and I know Michelle Pfeiffer wanted to have lunch with me, but she always wants to have lunch with me, so I think I can probably get out of it.
KAYLA: Oh my God, he’s unbearable.
ELLEN: He’s absolutely incapable of not making a joke. It wouldn’t matter what the circumstance was.
KAYLA: Been like that his whole life, I’m here to tell you.
LAURIE: Danny! Shut up! Shut up!
KAYLA: Okay. We’re going to see you Thursday.
DANNY: Oh! Laurie! I have a request. You know what I want you to make for us Thursday?
LAURIE: What?
DANNY: Congee.
LAURIE: You know what? I’m going to make you fucking congee.
DANNY: That’ll be so great. Because I. Love. Congee.
LAURIE: ’Night, you guys.
(All say good night. Kayla and Laurie exit.)
ELLEN: ’Night, you guys.
(Danny closes the door after them. A beat.)
DANNY: Just . . . Don’t worry about it.
ELLEN: Am I an asshole? Am I just a total asshole?
(Danny makes a gesture meaning “let it go.”)
What was that, I don’t understand being angry? Come on, I’m angry all the time!
DANNY: Well . . .
ELLEN: What?
DANNY: There’s a difference between intellectual anger and wanting to kill somebody.
(Ellen thinks about this and takes in the fact that he’s right—and, in this one way, she probably was an asshole.)
ELLEN: Okay. Okay, yes. I can see that. I can see that. But you know what? Okay, it was a stupid word choice. Granted. Granted. But there is a difference between the trauma that Laurie feels—and I know she feels it, it kills me, it kills me how shaken she still is—but there is a difference between that and the manipulative fear-mongering Bush and company are promoting!
DANNY: I know.
ELLEN: I know you know. I’m sorry, I don’t know why I’m yelling at you. Because they’re so judgmental, that’s why, and it pisses me off!
DANNY: I know.
ELLEN: I know, you just let it slide off your back and // I should . . .
DANNY: It pisses me off.
ELLEN: It does?
DANNY: Yeah. Of course. They’ve decided I’m a victim. But . . . there’s nothing I can do about it.
ELLEN: We can . . . be really angry.
DANNY (Laughing): Yeah, okay.
ELLEN: I don’t like the way they judge us.
DANNY: Oh well. They don’t want our life. But we don’t want theirs either.
ELLEN: They’ve decided you’re the victim and I’m the . . . bad one. They have no idea you had an affair. What would happen to their neat little analysis if they knew that? Their brains would explode.
DANNY: I presume you’re talking about Claire?
ELLEN: Yes.
DANNY: It didn’t really get that far, you know.
ELLEN: I know, but—
DANNY: I mean . . . she was totally into me.
ELLEN: I know.
DANNY: By the way.
ELLEN: I know she was. (Small beat) It was a real thing that happened, though.
DANNY: Yeah . . . Yeah, I mean, for a while I did think it might be good for me to be with someone more regular // and I could have—
ELLEN: Regular?
DANNY: Uh . . . yes, Ellen, regular—and it see
med like I could have had that with Claire.
(Beat.)
But . . . then she wasn’t you.
(Ellen throws her arms around him.)
I don’t know why you’re the one that I want, but it seems like there’s nothin’ I can do about it.
(They sit. Her arms wrapped around him. A beat.)
ELLEN (Sitting up to look at him): How are we doing, Danny?
DANNY (Getting up, suddenly cranky): Okay—enough! Do not let them // bother you!
ELLEN: No, this isn’t about them. It’s not. It’s about us. I’m checking in.
DANNY: About what?
ELLEN: About us. You need to tell me . . . how you are. You know that, right?
DANNY: I do.
ELLEN: Okay.
(He holds out his hand to shake hers—deal. She keeps hold of his hand, holding his gaze steady.)
DANNY: I don’t like it.
You know that, right?
(She nods slightly.)
But if I told you to stop— You have to play this out. I get that. You have to go through it . . . so you know . . . you want to be with me.
(Ellen nods.)
Hey. You’re freakin’ lucky.
ELLEN: I know.
(Beat.)
Thank you Danny, for being // so—
DANNY: You think I’m doing this for you? Listen, I’m just doing this so you’ll realize what is obvious to the most casual passerby—that I am a staggeringly handsome man who is also your perfect and eternal soul mate, that I—
(She throws her arms around him again and hugs him hard.)
—that I’m the one you want.
(Ellen rises from the couch and crosses back into the present.)
ELLEN: Where do you look for a blind spot?
(Beat.)
Do you know what just recently occurred to me? You’ve probably realized this before, but it just occurred to me that when people say they want change—what they really mean is—I want you to change.
(Beat.)
Because it’s easy to see someone else’s blind spot, isn’t it?
But it’s . . . wow.
It’s so much harder to see your own.
Act Two
Scene 1
Projections: Coverage of Congress’s vote to authorize Bush to go to war, and Hillary Clinton speaking about the difficulty of her vote in favor of authorization.
Early October 2002. Eight months later.