“You haven’t eaten in a while,” Haruka pressed gently. “And you were injured.”
Said injury was already mostly healed, and barely registered as a boo-boo. Alice swallowed thickly, shame burning through her as she brushed her hands together, more for something to do with her now trembling fingers than anything else.
“Visions in Wonderland are not uncommon.” Romi straightened. “This world works in mysterious ways. We’ll rest here. Night will rise soon. We’ll continue at daybreak.”
“I think you may have scared off any fish,” Haruka said with a faint smile.
“I’ll take care of food, you two see to a fire.” Romi jogged in the direction of the trees, where Chou chewed on the leav— puffs in the branches.
Haruka’s hand dropped into Alice’s line of sight. “Come on.” Her voice was quiet, understanding.
Shame still burning through her, Alice took that hand and the help up. Neither of them spoke as they returned to the basket, where Haruka dug a lighter from a small compartment that held some pots and pans. Still working in silence, the girls gathered some branches and grass, picked a relatively earthy spot, and got to work.
It didn’t take long for the girls to get a fire started. Romi returned with armfuls of tufts. At her direction, the girls roasted them on the ends of sticks like marshmallows. They smelled like oranges and tasted like honey-glazed ham. The weirdest, most delicious thing Alice’d ever eaten. Romi explained that they didn’t hold much nutritional value, but they would help take the edge off of their growing hunger. For a time.
Night fell with Alice stealing glances at the river every so often.
“Still haven’t seen anything,” Haruka murmured from where she sat nearby. “What happened, again?”
Alice shook her head. “I’m not sure. I thought sh—someone grabbed me.” No way she was about to try and explain that she was attacked by her damned self; that would only make things sound wilder. “They pulled me into the river and held me under.” She ran her hands over her bare forearms. “Scratched me. I felt it.” That was the part she couldn’t shake. You don’t imagine pain like that. Or maybe you did, here. That was the point of this place, right?
“But you’re okay?”
“I’m fine.” Alice didn’t understand it any better than Haruka was kindly trying to. “At least physically. I don’t know, maybe … maybe this place is just messing with me. It is Wonderland.”
Haruka smiled at that. “Here.” She offered one of the remaining sticks Romi had set in the ground with cooked, smoky meat leaves. “We’ve got a long day tomorrow, don’t want to stop if we don’t have to.”
“Thanks.”
After dinner, Alice offered to take first watch. She didn’t think she would be able to get to sleep right now, anyway. With orders to wake Haruka when the Breaking began, she settled in near the fire. Romi and Haruka slept in the basket. It didn’t look much more comfortable than the ground, but Romi insisted it was.
Two hours down and nothing happened. Alice spent the time looking over her loaner sword for any signs of damage. Nothing out of the ordinary. The silvery glass of the blade glittered in the blue moonlight. Alice used the hem of her shirt to clean it, slipping just close enough to the river to dip the cloth in before hurrying back to the fire.
Once it was as good as it was going to get, she went through a few practice stances, acclimating herself to the weight, the heft, the reach. She’d already used it in battle once, but you could never get too familiar with a weapon, especially when your life depended on you using it. That was something Hatta used to say a lot, in a lot of different ways.
Damn. Even while practicing in the middle of nowhere, after nearly being drowned by her reflection, she couldn’t keep her mind from wandering his direction. She remembered the screams over the phone, the sounds of destruction. God, she hoped he was okay. She hoped all of them were okay.
Sliding the sword into the sheath, she took a low breath to try and calm her anxious nerves.
“Alice.”
She froze. Every inch of her went stone still. That wasn’t Haruka. Or Romi.
That did not just happen …
Her heart pounding, her eyes wide and darting about in the darkness, she searched the edges of the fire’s light.
Nothing.
Careful, her senses straining, she made her way over to peek into the basket. Romi and Haruka were stretched along the bottom, their chests rising and falling slowly with the lazy breaths of sleep.
A cool, runny feeling of relief swept through her.
I’m hearing shit now?
“Alice.”
The voice was sharper that time, clearer. It drew her name out, beckoning.
She spun, her hands gripping her sword, ready to draw it.
That was when the firelight flickered and a flash of flame against black caught her attention. The Vorpal Blade lay in the grass near where she had been sitting. Its surface seemed to ripple in the night, the light of the fire reaching out but never touching the surface, snuffed out just a few inches shy. Except, just barely, a hint of light shot along the length of the sword.
Alice bent to retrieve the dark weapon. The pommel rested cool against her palm. The sword itself was lighter than anything this size had any business being. Like she had with the Figment Blade, she swung. The black blade arched through the night, the shuttering of light as it passed through air giving the impression it had sliced the very air for the briefest of moments.
“Alice!”
She spun to face the river, fear swimming through her. She’d definitely heard someone call her name this time, and swallowed the want to call out, demand to know who was messing with her. That was how people died in these situations, hollering in the forest at some strange sound or noise.
You better act like your Black ass done seen enough of these movies to know better. Strangest pep talk ever, but with a measured breath she drew on another memory of Hatta, during her first trip in Wonderland.
You are the most dangerous thing out here right now.
Her fingers tightened on the Vorpal Blade as her gaze swept her surroundings, slower this time. Her eyes passed over the river.
“Alice, quickly!” The water splashed along with the words. Had that happened last time? She hadn’t been paying attention.
Sword out, she inched her way toward the water’s edge. As she approached, the image of the sky reflected on the water’s surface stretched out before her. Shining brighter than the moon, Reflection-Alice waited beneath the waters. She wasn’t the rotting vision Alice had seen earlier, and that alone was the only reason Alice dared to draw closer.
Their eyes locked, and the familiar warm brown of her father’s eyes, her eyes, gazed back at her. They even crinkled slightly at the edges when Reflection-Alice smiled.
“At last,” Reflection-Alice breathed.
Alice glanced around, over both shoulders, back at the basket, then to the river. “The hell is going on?”
“I’ve been trying to reach out to you, but my voice is silenced so far away from the source.”
“The what now?”
“The source. It is how I am able to manifest in such ways as this.” Reflection-Alice lifted her hands, indicating herself.
“Right.” Alice looked her reflection up and down. “This … Who’re you? I mean, you look like me, but you ain’t me. Not for real. ’Cause I’m me.” Okay, now she was starting to sound like the locals …
“I am, but I am not. Much like you are both yourself and not at all who you think you are.”
Alice shook her head, lifting a hand. “No, just … This vague, mystic stuff, I don’t … I ain’t got time for that. Just once I’d like a straight answer.”
“I’m sorry. I’m not myself, you see. And I’m barely you at all, but just enough for us to meet like this.”
“But you’ve been here before.” Alice finally lowered the sword. “In a dream. I thought you were a dream. Then … you were at the pub. You g
ave me the Eye.”
Reflection-Alice nodded.
“You’re … You were there when … when I fought the Black Knight.” Alice had been turning what she remembered from the fight in the football field over and over in her mind, trying to see if there was any way she could’ve known, any way she could’ve saved Chess. In the end, she wasn’t exactly sure how she’d saved herself.
Xelon had explained that everything was covered in that black pitch, the place full of it to bursting. She thought everyone was done for, until an explosion of light and warmth cleared the area. When the light faded, Xelon said Alice was left lying in the grass, Hatta not far off. The two of them found Chess’s body, then a half-conscious Alice, got them both into the car and back to the pub.
Later, Alice tried to remember. She recalled the light. A voice. Her voice.
Reflection-Alice nodded again. “I have been here from the beginning.”
“When I became a Dreamwalker?”
“Much longer.”
Alice blinked and nodded this time, mostly to herself. “I’ve lost it.” She gave another nod. “I’m in the woods, in the middle of the night, holding a devil sword, and literally talking to myself.”
“As I told you, I have always been with you. Our connection is stronger here, my voice louder.”
Alice eyed her reflection. “Was … that you earlier? Trying to drown me?”
Reflection-Alice shook her head.
“So I did imagine it.”
“Yes and no—ah!” Reflection-Alice gasped and clutched at her chest.
“What! What is it?” The sight of herself in some sort of pain was … trippy AF.
“I’ve wasted too much time.” Reflection-Alice met her gaze. “I came to warn you. You cannot do this. The path you’re on will lead to nothing but darkness and despair. Turn away.”
“Turn away? W-what turn away, I can’t—you mean going to the castle?”
“You must let love in, or the cycle continues.” Reflection-Alice started to fade. “Trust your heart when your eyes deceive you. Believe in the truth of yourself, or swords will shatter. Hearts will break. Heads … will roll…”
“Wait!” Alice stepped forward, her feet sloshing at the bank.
The waters were clear, her reflection gone.
“Alice?” Haruka stood in the basket, clutching her Figment katana. She blinked, glancing around, her hair a bit disheveled but her gaze alert.
“Nothing.” Alice murmured, stepping back. “Sorry. Thought I saw some … some fish. Didn’t mean to wake you.”
Haruka made a noise at the back of her throat, though she didn’t sound irritated or anything, despite having been woken up at least a whole hour early. The golden lines that would split the sky had just started to crawl across the vastness of the heavens.
“You can go back to sleep. Not your watch yet,” Alice said, embarrassed.
“Once I’m up, I’m up.” Haruka climbed out of the basket, munching on one of the leftover meat puffs. “It’s fine. You should get some sleep, though.”
“Not sure I’ll be able to.” She peeled her wet shoes and socks off and set them near the low-burning fire.
“You should try.” Haruka eyed her up and down, a considering look on her face.
Alice’s face heated in turn.
“If not, let me look at your wound.” Haruka pointed.
For a second, Alice wasn’t sure what was being asked, then she jolted with realization. “Oh! Um, okay.” The fire in her face intensified as she shifted around and lifted her stained shirt. It was covered in Nightmare gunk, a bit of blood, mostly the Black Knight’s. She tossed it aside, thankful for the cami beneath, and wondered why she hadn’t taken it off already.
It says something when you’re so used to being covered in crap that you don’t actually remove it when you can.
She shifted around to place herself in front of Haruka, angling her body over to expose her side to the light. It stung a little, the shifting, but was otherwise fine.
“Oh!” She jumped slightly when Haruka’s touch brushed her skin.
Haruka yanked her hand back. “What?”
Alice shook her head. “Nothing. Just surprised. Tickles … a little…” Well, that wasn’t awkward as hell.
Haruka chuckled faintly and Alice felt like her cheeks were going to spontaneously combust.
“How! Um … how did you become a Dreamwalker?” Alice blurted, eager to change the subject. “I asked before, and you started to tell me, but we were interrupted.” She hoped she wasn’t being rude, just … weird, and … Haruka was hot, okay? And it was getting hot out here, and they should just talk about something else maybe?
For the stretch of a minute or so, Haruka didn’t say anything, and Alice desperately wanted to find a rock to crawl under. The hell was wrong with her? Getting in other folks’ business. The look on Haruka’s face the first time said this probably wasn’t something she wanted to talk about, but Alice just had to press. She wasn’t trying to be hurtful, just … Haruka seemed … nice? No, that wasn’t it. It was more than that. The other girl was like Alice, out here, fighting all of this.
Yeah, the twins were, too, but this was different. Dee and Dem had each other, and they were dudes. Guys were expected to be the hero, the warrior. Girls were the damsel or the prize. Well, Alice wasn’t anyone’s damsel, and she wasn’t anyone’s prize. Haruka definitely wasn’t. And she seemed like … like a kindred spirit. One Alice kinda wanted to connect with a bit more, if she was being honest with herself.
“Nightmare killed my mother,” Haruka said, so suddenly it made Alice jump. “Not a Nightmare, but a man under the influence of one. It had gotten through. I didn’t know that was what happened, only that he broke into our house and stabbed her while I was at school.”
Alice’s insides twisted. She knew what it was like to lose a parent, though … Her dad died of natural causes, messed up as they were. She couldn’t imagine him being murdered. “I’m sorry.”
“I was at the police station when Romi found me. She felt it was her fault, what happened. They had missed one, and this was the result.”
“They?” Alice pressed gently.
“Her and Touma. He was called before me.” Haruka tapped her fingers against her thigh. “They fought together for years, prevented so much. But … not that. As a result, Touma felt it was time to step down. He had a husband, children. His time wasn’t his own like before, and he had responsibilities. So I took his place. To prevent this from happening to anyone else for as long as I could.”
Something inside Alice bubbled faintly, but not unpleasantly. The way Haruka talked, the conviction in her voice, made Alice’s spine straighten just a little bit more.
“I’m sorry for your loss,” Alice said, her mind drifting toward her own mother. She wondered what she was doing now, how she was handling Alice being gone now that she knew where she was and what she was doing. Would knowing all of that alleviate any of the fear that she might get that call? That someone, not even the police, would show up at her doorstep to tell her her baby was gone? She hoped so. If only a little. And she hoped not too much time passed in the human world before she saw her again.
“Thank you.”
Alice wondered briefly if Haruka’s father was still in the picture, if he was somewhere, worried about his daughter the same way Alice’s mom was worried about hers. It sent a slight twinge of guilt through Alice, but Haruka had chosen this, just like she had. She hadn’t heard Haruka mention needing to go home or check in, so it was anyone’s guess, really.
“What do you do when you’re not doing this?” Alice asked, hoping to change the topic to something lighter.
Haruka grinned then. “Do you know Sailor Moon?”
Alice’s eyes widened.
By the time she noticed the broadening lines in the sky that signaled the start of the Breaking, she and Haruka were deep in discussion of the finer details of what turned out to be their favorite show—subbed, not dubbed. H
aruka’s ever careful fingers had kept up their dance around the healing wound on Alice’s side. She’d cleaned it up and now pressed a damp mixture to it.
“Bit of chewed Jack.” Haruka pointed. “Those little needle things in patches near the water. Will act as a bandage and pull some of the venom out a bit faster.”
The stuff was cold and tingled slightly. “So, all good?”
“All good, for being just shy of maybe taking out one of your kidneys.”
Alice snorted. “The Black Knight took the worst of it.”
Haruka pulled Alice’s cami down and lightly patted her side. “That’s strange. Him taking the blow for you.”
“Then killing the Nightmare.”
“He must’ve been badly injured to leave that behind.” Haruka jerked her chin at the Vorpal Blade where it lay in the nearby grass.
“Blood loss makes you do wild shit.” Alice set a hand over her side, barely resisting the urge to scratch. It was itchy now, for some reason. “Guess I’ll try and sleep.”
“Good idea,” Haruka murmured.
Alice climbed to her feet and took up the Vorpal Blade. She glanced at the basket. “Do you think this being near Romi will cause any trouble?”
Haruka rolled her shoulders. “The way I understand it, it’s useless if you don’t know how to use it.”
“I guess that would be the literal definition.” Alice waved and headed for the basket. Chou slept curled behind it, rumbling faintly. Climbing in, she settled into the spot across from Romi, who slept without a sound.
Her body was exhausted, but her mind was running every which way with any random thought that popped into it. Mostly she wondered what her reflection was talking about when she said all that stuff about love and trusting your heart.
Maybe it meant something about the actual Heart. Or maybe she was hallucinating.
Setting the Vorpal Blade between herself and the side of the basket, she folded her arms into a pillow and shut her eyes. Darkness. All was darkness. Would there ever be light again?
A Dream So Dark Page 21