by Cole, Fiona
“You—” My voice cut off and I had to clear the tightness in my throat to get the question out. “You, didn’t mind me being with Jackson? It didn’t bother you?”
“God, no.” She fanned herself for emphasis and it loosened a fraction of an inch of pressure off my chest. “Jake…I would never judge you for what turned you on. As long as I get to be a part of it. We agreed on everything about last night, and I would’ve spoken up if something had bothered me. We’re always honest with each other, which is what makes us work so well.”
She was right, and I knew all of that, but adding a third person, especially someone I had a history with, especially a man, was new and unchartered territory.
“Did it bother you that Jackson fucked me?” she asked.
My face heated just remembering watching his cock move in and out of her, my cum coating his shaft. “Not at all.”
“Then why is it different for you?”
I glanced her way, her eyebrows raised, waiting for my answer like it was so easy to give. “Because I’m a guy and I’m not gay.”
She scoffed at my answer. “Sex is sex, Jake. It’s not like you’re repulsed by vaginas and boobs, only wanting to be with men. Being with Jackson was in the moment. It was sexy. No holds barred.”
“I’ll give you that. I’m definitely not repulsed by your vagina.”
“Good.” She dug her fingers into the hair on the back of my head, sending chills down my spine when she scratched with her nails. “You can show me how much you love it later.”
“Damn right I will,” I growled.
When we pulled into the driveway, I felt like our conversation was coming to an end, but I had one more question to ask.
“Do you want to repeat last night?”
“I wouldn’t turn it down. What about you?”
I put the car in park and turned to face her. Her blue eyes were dark, and her cheeks flushed, like the idea of a repeat had her excited. “I wouldn’t turn it down either.” Swallowing, I took a moment to let the choice to continue our threesome roll around in my head, trying to find any issues. “If this continued for more than one repeat, when would we stop? How do we work this out between all of us? Is there a limit?”
She linked her fingers with mine. “We stop when it doesn’t feel right anymore. For all of us. As long as we remain honest with each other, then we should be fine. Soon we’ll be an old married couple, remembering that year before our wedding when we did everything we wanted.”
Something held me back from picturing that future too clearly, and I didn’t want to delve too deep as to why. Instead, I gave a soft laugh and said, “Okay.”
I gave her a lingering kiss before we got out of the car and headed to the house.
“Carina. Jake,” my mother greeted us in the entryway, pulling us each in for a hug. “I’m so glad you could make it tonight. I’m sure you have better things to do on a Saturday night than have dinner with your mother.”
I kissed her cheek. “I always have time for you, Mom.”
She looked around me and her brows furrowed. “We’re missing someone.”
“He should be here soon.”
As if us talking about him summoned him, there was a knock at the door. Carina opened it to Jackson.
I had to swallow the extra saliva pooling in my mouth just looking at him. His dark brown hair was tousled perfectly, like he’d just run his fingers through it on the porch. The black button down stretched across his broad shoulders, tight across his biceps. I hadn’t taken enough time to appreciate the man that Jackson had grown into. He’d always been muscular, but over the past five years, he’d really grown into his body.
He stepped in and smiled at my mom, carrying a bouquet of peonies the color of the sunset. She kissed his cheek just as she did mine and I became envious of her lips pressing to the dark stubble that was thicker than this morning.
“Look at you, all grown up.”
“It’s good to see you, Mrs. Wellington.”
“Oh, call me Joanne. No need for formalities.”
“These are for you,” he said, handing over the flowers, giving her his best smile.
“Oh, Jackson,” she gushed, a hint of color staining her cheeks. I rolled my eyes looking to Carina who was hiding a smile behind her hands. “I’ll put these in some water. You all go sit down. Dinner will be out in a bit.”
When she disappeared around the corner, Carina moved to hug Jackson and kissed his cheek. Before she pulled away, she muttered, “Kiss ass.”
He shrugged shamelessly and gave me a nod in welcoming.
Mom came in carrying a basket of rolls. Behind her was our housekeeper, Martha, holding two dishes in each hand.
“Let me help,” I said, moving to stand from my seat.
“I’ve got this, you sit down and just wait patiently.” Martha was always doing it all on her own. She’d been with our family for years and became more of a companion for Mom than anything else after Dad died.
“This smells delicious,” Carina said.
“Martha was nice enough to stay and help me get it all ready. She did most of it.”
We dug in, Jackson and I filling our plates to the edge.
“How have you been Jackson?” my mom asked.
“Good. Busy, but good.”
“That’s good to hear. I was devastated to hear about your parents.” He only nodded, indicating he heard her. “How is your brother doing?”
“He’s good. I actually just saw him a few hours ago. Talked about taking him out tomorrow to do something fun. He gets bored cooped up all the time.”
“Oh, you should have brought him. Next time, okay?”
“Of course. He’d love it.”
Next time. My mind rolled the words around, enjoying them. Liking the way Jackson was situating himself back into my life. ‘Next time’ held so much potential for a future worth of adventures. A future of time with my friend filled with laughter and a comfort I hadn’t realized was missing until he showed up and gave it back to me.
“So, how did you two meet up again?”
“Jackson is going to be the manager of the bar we are working on setting up.”
“Oh, that’s so exciting. You and Carina are working on that together, right?”
“Yes,” Carina answered. “It’s nice getting to spend some extra time with Jake, even if us seeing each other at the office is hit or miss.”
“Well, Jackson, you have the two top employees of the company. Your business is guaranteed to succeed with them.”
“We do make a good team,” Carina said.
Her hand slid over mine and squeezed, making me smile. My eyes rose to find Jackson’s brow furrowed as he stared at our hands. His jaw clenched, and he looked up meeting my eyes, stealing the air from my chest. His expression was so unguarded, the hurt and longing punched me in the stomach. But then he looked away, taking another bite of his food.
I kept staring, trying to catch his eyes, trying to decipher his feelings, but he refused to look my way. He smiled through dinner. He met Carina’s eyes and was active in the conversation, but I struggled to move past the look.
Why would he have that look at Carina holding my hand? It hadn’t been sexual and wasn’t that all Jackson wanted from me? I knew he was attracted to me and knew he liked me as a friend, but I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe there was more. Jackson was a player, always had been. He worked at a club where he had sex with multiple people a night. He didn’t want a relationship.
Right?
But what if he did?
“Carina.” My mom’s voice pulled me out of my thoughts. “Have you set any plans for the wedding? I’m getting antsy to start planning.”
“Not yet, but I’d like to start once we’re done with the job with Voy.”
My mother gave an exaggerated sigh. “Okay. But don’t wait too long. You two need to get married and give me some grandbabies to spoil.”
Mom and Carina rambled on about dates, and I stole
another look over at Jackson. He was staring at his empty plate like it had personally done him wrong. His jaw was clenched, his fists curled tight on each side. I needed him to look up, so I could get a read on him. I needed to see the light cockiness in his eyes. Have him make some taunting comment about my wedding. Anything to remind me we were just friends. That it was just sex. That this was all for fun.
He looked up, but he didn’t give me what I needed. The pain was still there, his mouth turned down. I held his gaze, wondering if he could feel my confusion, wondering if he saw something in me that I didn’t even know was there. I needed to look away. Our staring felt loud, like it was trying to shout over my fiancée talking wedding plans with my mom. Like it was taking over every part of me that shouldn’t belong to him.
“What about you, Jackson?” My mom’s question had him looking away, and the noise of the room came rushing back, sounding too loud. “Are you seeing anyone?”
He cleared his throat. “No. Life is pretty busy right now.”
“Well, I’m sure there is someone out there waiting for you to make them happy.”
“I appreciate your confidence, Mrs. Wellington.”
“Joanne,” she reminded sternly.
“Joanne.” He gave her a smile and flicked his eyes to mine again. “I should get going. I’ve got some work to get done tomorrow. I really appreciate this dinner, Joanne. It was delicious, and I loved catching up with you.”
“Of course. Anytime. Don’t forget to bring Andrew over next time.”
He smiled and nodded, standing up to leave.
“I’ll walk you out,” I said, standing from my own chair.
I followed him out to the foyer. He stopped and wouldn’t meet my eyes but muttered a quick, “I’ll see you later, man.”
“Jackson.”
He froze before slowly turning to face me. I stepped closer, scanning his face.
“What’s going on?”
His answer was quick. “Nothing. Just tired from a crazy experience I had last night.” He tried to joke, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes.
“If last night isn’t what you want, we don’t have to do anything like it again.”
He was shaking his head before I’d even finished.
“No, last night was amazing. More than amazing.”
“Okay.” But he still didn’t look like the cool and carefree Jackson I knew. “Call me, okay?”
“Yeah, man. Night.”
He turned to leave, and I don’t know what came over me, what possessed me. Maybe it was a need to comfort my friend in any way I knew how. Maybe it was a part of me I wasn’t ready to acknowledge yet. But I snatched his hand and jerked him back to me, stepping into his space and pressed my lips to his.
Jackson whimpered—actually whimpered—at the contact. The kiss didn’t go further. It didn’t become heated or a tussle of hands and mouths fighting for dominance. It was a hard pressing of lips. A more intimate hug, wanting both of us to know everything was okay.
One last peck and we pulled back.
“Night, man,” I whispered.
He rushed back in for a kiss to my cheek. “Goodnight, Jake.”
I took a deep breath and waited for the door to close before heading back to my fiancée.
The rest of the night passed with two more bottles of wine and stories about our fathers. I always liked the way my mom laughed when we talked about Dad, so I never shied away from staying over dinner to reminisce.
“Okay, you two. I’m going to head to bed, but feel free to stay and finish the bottle.” She stood and kissed Carina on the head before coming to do the same with me.
“Goodnight, Mom. I love you.”
“Love you, too. Drive safe and send me a message when you get home.”
I was pretty sure my mom would be having me send her messages once I was home until I was fifty. If it set her at ease, I didn’t mind.
Once she left, Carina and I finished our glasses, but decided to put the rest of the bottle in the fridge.
“I have to run upstairs real quick to grab a book.” At her cocked head, I explained, “It was one from college. I figured I could use it to refresh my memory for an algorithm I’m using.”
“Okay. I’ll come help.”
She followed me to my room and looked around, touching pictures and trophies atop my shelves. Flipped through some of my old crossword puzzles. The one she currently held was Jackson and my first competition book. He had a matching one, and we used to race each other in finishing a puzzle. I probably had about twenty more just like it.
My stomach pinched and then dropped at remembering our kiss. In that moment, my body had urged me to do it—to form a connection. But looking at Carina’s smiling face, I felt regret. We were in this together, but I took a moment for myself that had nothing to do with her.
“How many lucky ladies got to spend time with you up in this room, Mr. Wellington?” She dragged her finger down my chest, stepping in close before pressing a kiss to my jaw. “Five?” Kiss. “Ten?” Kiss. “Twenty?”
I snagged her lips on the next kiss, losing myself in my fiancée.
“It was probably more,” she said, evading my lips.
“There may have been some deflowering that occurred.”
“Oh, yeah.”
“Just the one. Mine. Otherwise, it was just a handy or a BJ that we snuck away for.”
“Is there anything you didn’t do in this room?” she asked, eyebrows up.
I gripped her hips and turned until the back of her knees hit the bed. I toppled her over and slowly fell to my knees.
“There was one thing I never did in this room.”
She bit her lip, her breasts heaving as I worked my hands up her skirt. “Oh yeah? What was that?”
Holding her stare, I kissed her knee, then her thigh. My hand reached her warmth and pushed her panties aside.
“Let me show you.”
With my head buried between my fiancée’s thighs, I remembered who I was. I was a man who’d probably be married in a year. A man who loved to eat a woman out. A man who didn’t desire other men.
When that last thought had doubt crowding my thoughts, I just licked Carina harder and forgot how to think as I listened to her moans.
15
Jackson
I’d managed to avoid Jake and Carina for all of three days. Seeing them at dinner together, holding hands, talking about their marriage had pulled back the rose-colored glasses I’d been wearing since our goodbye kisses the morning after. I didn’t know what to expect. Did I think I’d show up at Jake’s mom’s house with warm kisses from them both with his mom standing right there? The explanation for that would probably have her kicking me out.
Then Jake had kissed me, and it was like all the pressure in my chest during dinner released. I’d driven home smiling the whole way. I’d laid in bed replaying every moment over the twenty-four-hour period yo-yoing between elation and doubt. I’d woken up a confused mess and decided avoidance was the best answer.
At least until Carina’s messages started this morning.
Carina: What’s going on?
Me: Nothing. How are you doing?
Carina: I’m worried.
Me: Why? Are you okay?
Carina: You’ve been avoiding me this week. Every time I’ve seen you at Voy the last two days, you’ve given me some lame-ass wave and then bolted.
I’d winced, rubbing at my chest, the confusion blooming all over again. This time it mixed with a pinch of pain that I was worrying her. This woman was amazing and had let me into her body, and there I was dodging around corners like a coward. Worse, I was avoiding her because I was jealous of her relationship with Jake.
This whole threesome began when I saw Jake and craved a connection with him. Somewhere along the way, Carina had moved up the totem pole of importance and as I got closer to her, the shittier I felt about having such strong feelings for Jake. I shook my head of the swirl of thoughts and continued with being a
coward.
Me: I’m not avoiding you. You just happen to catch me right as I’m out the door.
Carina: Bullshit.
Me: It’s okay. No need to worry.
Carina: I’ll say it again…Bullshit.
Carina: Jackson?
Carina: Jackson Fields!
Carina: Grrr. I’m going to call you on my lunch. And you will pick up.
Carina: Otherwise I will not let you get near my pussy or my mouth ever again.
The girl didn’t play fair. So, when she called, I picked up. She’d told me to stop my bullshit and come over for dinner. I’d pushed my doubts aside and given a simple, yes ma’am. Carina was a force to be reckoned with.
Which was how I ended up in front of her apartment door with wine in one hand and flowers in the other. After knocking, I waited with my heart in my throat, unsure of the welcome I’d be greeted with.
Carina opened the door with her chin held high and her feet bare. I could see she wore a black dress under an overly floral apron and her hair piled on top of her head. She looked beautiful as she regally looked down her nose at me and scanned my offerings before locking her eyes on mine. I somehow managed to stand there and not look away and breathed a sigh of relief when her lips twitched.
“You’ll do,” she said, her smile stretching wide as she pulled me in for a hug. Her slim arms held me close and slipped a comfort into my bones. When she pulled back, she grabbed the wine and turned to walk away. “I’m in the middle of making dinner. Jake is in the kitchen keeping me company and you can join him.”
“Yes, ma’am.” I closed the door and hung up my jacket before following with the flowers. “Is this something we’re doing tonight? Because I need to prepare my body if it’s going to be bossed around.”
“Maybe,” she shrugged just as she rounded the corner, “but I like it when you and Jake boss me around more.”
Jake stood tall, his long legs extended out from where he leaned against the counter. His thick arms stretched the dark blue button up shirt as they crossed his chest and brought a glass filled with white wine to his lips. However, that glass paused halfway at Carina’s words.