by Natalie Ann
She frowned. “It doesn’t mean much when someone does it because they want something in return.”
He didn’t really want to address that, just wanted to keep it all light. She brought her past up at the worst times when he always wanted to know more. “Maybe I want something in return too.”
“It’s different with you. Everything you do comes from the heart. I can’t say that about a lot of people I’ve crossed paths with in my life.”
More hints and snippets that he wanted to address, but couldn’t right now. He just wanted to show her what he felt. Maybe make her feel a little bit of it too.
Quietly in his humble living room that didn’t hold a candle to her parents’ home, or the apartments she’d probably lived in her whole life, he started to give her a part of himself that he’d been afraid to show anyone before. That he didn’t even know he had in him to give.
His fingers dug into the arch of her foot; he heard the moan and felt the blood rush to every part of his body in full force. But this wasn’t about him, this was about her.
This was letting her know he appreciated her.
That he cared for her.
That he was falling in love with her.
The words were trapped in his throat, but he could try to show her the best way he could. The only way for now.
Trailing his fingers from her arch to her ankle and back, he never thought such a little touch could be so erotic, but Noelle was proving him wrong. Her head was laid on the back of the couch, her eyes shut, her lips parted. It was like looking at Marilyn Monroe and seeing seduction in her beauty rather than sex in a magazine.
It was natural, not forced.
It was feelings emitted as a result. Cause and effect. No cameras. No big paycheck.
Just her reacting to him. To what he was doing to her.
If there was a bigger aphrodisiac on the face of this earth, he’d never know, because in his mind, it couldn’t get any better than supermodel Noelle Bennett lying on his couch looking like she was in ecstasy over his simple touch.
A touch that came not from a physical need, but an emotional desire.
He moved her legs off his lap, stood up, then bent down to cradle her in his arms.
“Whoa, what do you think you’re doing?” she asked, squirming to get out of his arms, the look he’d managed to put there gone by apprehension.
“Carrying you to bed.” He started moving toward the stairs. “Please don’t insult me and tell me not to drop you.”
She bit her lip and he saw in her eyes that was exactly what she was going to say. He shook his head at her, then leaned down and kissed her on the lips quickly, making the trek to his room in record time.
“No one has ever carried me before like that,” she said so softly he almost didn’t hear.
“Good. It’s nice I can give you a first in your life.”
Her hand came up to the side of his face. “You’ve given me more firsts than you realize.”
All that blood that rushed through his body downstairs was warming right now. Filling him with a heat that had nothing to do with lust and everything to do with emotions so deep in his heart he was afraid he was going to split in two as they made their way out.
He laid her on the bed, then stood back to undress. When she started to remove her own clothes, he said, “No, let me.” So she stayed there and just watched him undress, making him feel like she only had eyes for him and those self-doubts were vanishing like the fog in the sunlight.
He knelt on the bed and started to undress her until she was as naked as him. And when her body was bared in all its glory, it was time to worship her the way it should be done. The way she was born to be treasured.
He was going to be the one to do it. He was going to be the one she’d remember years from now.
Kissing her cheek, then her neck, her ear, her collarbone, down her chest. His lips and his tongue needed to taste it all. This was about letting her know it was more than sex.
This was making love.
“Chase?” she asked. Her voice was low, a tone he’d never heard before. Like a whisper and a plea mixed together. “Is that all you’re going to do?”
“I could kiss your body all night. I could show you how beautiful you are.”
“There is more to me than my body. Than my face,” she said.
He looked up into her eyes and for the first time he started to realize she really did have insecurities in her life. That maybe this famous supermodel didn’t have it all together. That she wasn’t as confident as she always wanted everyone to believe.
“You’re right. There is.”
He stopped what he was doing and started to reach for a condom, but she halted him. “Don’t. We don’t need it. I’m on birth control. I’ve always been protected, always made a man wear a condom, but I don’t want you to. I just want a connection with you like I’ve never felt before.”
Moving back over, he covered her, threaded their fingers together and entered her heat and wetness smoothly. Slid in and it felt like he was coming home. For as hot as he was, her body was hotter. Her body was taking him in, and controlling the show.
Thoughts of treasuring her body were gone and replaced by a desperation to connect on a level higher than heaven itself.
He kissed her softly, but she turned it deeper. She turned it carnal and it wasn’t for speed, but for need. He let her have her way and the two of them gave each other something he was positive could never be experienced with another person again.
Slowly Fading Away
Another week had gone by and life seemed to be going better than Noelle had ever thought possible. She never imagined she’d find a man that fulfilled her brain and her body like Chase.
That night last week, the one where he touched a part of her body—no, her soul—she always dreamed she’d find and never thought she would, was branded into her head like a memory to last a lifetime.
Years ago, if she thought she’d ever fall in love with someone, she never expected it to be someone like Chase.
Someone not a part of the world that she grew up in.
Someone so different than her in every way.
Someone so pure that she felt she was tainted.
Someone that she thought might be just too nice and too natural to be with her.
But those doubts were slowly fading away. She’d been labeled a lot of things in her life—most of them false. She’d developed skin thicker than an elephant’s, and brushed off comments for years.
All those times she’d said things were temporary was now making her realize that permanent could be a good thing. That she wanted it in a way that she never wanted anything in modeling. That she’d spent years building a nest egg in the hopes of finally reaching her true dream.
Being real was stronger than anything she’d ever come across.
The article that Kelly had written for the shelter had been a huge hit. All those puppies were gone on the first day the shelter opened. Then the calls had been nonstop since.
She hadn’t wanted her name to be released in the article at all, but it was. Just a brief mention of all the work that she was doing there and her own puppy, Calvin. Well, he wasn’t looking too much like a puppy at this point, but he still acted like it.
She was at home right now decorating her house for the holidays. Her first actual house, not an apartment or flat, and she was going all out with Christmas herself. So much so that every time she thought she was done, she’d find something else she just had to have. Her house didn’t have the clean professional look her parents’ had, but more of a hodge-podge of pieces scattered around like a department store in every room in her house.
She loved it!
It was just two weeks away and she couldn’t wait. When she looked out the window, she’d noticed the snow starting to fall and grabbed her coat and camera, then went into the backyard with Calvin.
While Calvin ran around the yard chasing the snowflakes, she started to shoot picture
s of the surroundings. The puppy at play. The trees looking like they were from a fairytale world. A beautiful untouched one and she wanted to capture that. It was time to do a winter collection in her mind and what better way than in her own backyard.
With the puppy leaving paw prints in the fresh snow, she crouched down and captured them as well, like a mother would their first child’s handprint in clay that would be displayed for all to see on a fireplace mantel.
She’d lost track of time until she realized her fingertips were numb and she could barely feel the camera under her palm. But there was an excitement in what she discovered. She knew in her heart some of these shots were going to be golden.
“Calvin! Time to go in.”
The dog followed her to the back door. Inside, she took her jacket off, threw it over the kitchen chair, slid off her boots. Then she brought her camera to her office and uploaded her pictures.
For hours she went through them, looking over every detail, zooming in, zooming out. Hundreds of pictures and she was determined to find the best to submit to her agent.
In the distance, she heard her phone ringing and stood up to go find it. It was in the kitchen on the table. She’d missed four calls from Emma. That was odd.
First off, Emma never called that much. And if she did, she left a message and waited until Noelle could call her back. It had to be something urgent, even without a voicemail.
“Hey, Emma,” she said when the call was picked up on the first ring. “What’s wrong?”
“What? I was calling to see if you were okay.”
“I’m fine. Why? You just talked to me a few weeks ago. We’ve been texting on and off. There’s nothing wrong here.”
“You didn’t see it?” Emma asked, her voice urgent.
“See what?” She felt a combination of ice and creepy crawly bugs up her spine. She knew that feeling well. She’d lain surrounded in bugs for a shoot once on a cold winter day in a bathing suit early in her career. Some things never left your mind and looking back made her realize they weren’t worth it either.
“The article in Fashion Word.”
Fashion Word was a gossip magazine that was circulated in the fashion world. Only up-and-coming models and those in the industry really read it. It wasn’t distributed as much as The Enquirer in print form but had a huge online following more than anything.
“No.” She walked back to her computer and did a quick search. “Shit.”
“I’m sorry. I’ll let you go read it and then you can call me and curse and swear all you want. I’m here for you.”
“Thanks, Emma.” She hung up before Emma could say another word and stared at her picture from an old runway shoot on the front cover with another picture of Chase in the background, with a headline that read, “How far the mighty have fallen.”
***
Chase was finishing up before lunch when he got an alert on his phone. He looked down to see it was just an article posted on Noelle. He’d set it up so that anytime something came up on her, he’d get notified so he wouldn’t miss out on new or exciting news about her photography.
The last thing he wanted to do was be an unsupportive boyfriend, or have her feel like he had no interest in her career, especially since she spent so much time helping out with his work.
He went back to his office and pulled up the alert in his email with the link attached, and found he wasn’t prepared for what he saw. His throat dropped into his stomach as if he were flying down the world’s highest rollercoaster.
There he was on the cover of some gossip magazine, Noelle looking stunning as if she’d just walked off the runway. He figured it was an old picture. He was there, in the background, looking like a nobody that she was just wasting her time with according to the title of the article.
Or slumming was more like it.
He wanted to be offended, rightly so. Instead he held it in and read the article, waiting to see how much of it was false.
Kelly Sanders had indeed betrayed Noelle just like she thought was going to happen. Kelly had written her article on his shelter. Given him a lot of praise for his work. Then a week later wrote what she was probably hoping was her biggest piece yet. A gossip article knocking Noelle down and making him look like the piker she was wasting her time with.
He wasn’t even mad he was made out to be the poor man Noelle was lowering herself to be with, now that he really thought about it.
Nope. That wasn’t true. He knew that Noelle truly cared for him.
What he was pissed at was the information on her last relationship that he hadn’t been able to find anything about. That he had to keep finding out things about her life online or from other sources.
That she didn’t trust him enough to tell him much of anything.
He knew she’d dated an up-and-coming model, but what he didn’t know was that the guy dumped her for someone else. That he accused her of needing a younger man to give her a second rise and when his name started to get out there, he told her to get lost. That this breakup caused her to leave modeling for good. That she was nothing but an old washed-up model. Anyone would know that part was false.
Part of him wanted to laugh over it. Noelle was the big name, not this guy. But when he did a search, he found out that Ricardo was “the male supermodel” right now. Was there truth to it? What was false? And why couldn’t he just know these things before he had to read them?
Only one way to find out.
He picked up his phone and called her. It was probably a better conversation in person. Chances are she didn’t even know about the article. He had a feeling she never looked herself up online since she always said she tried not to pay attention to what was written about her anymore.
“Hey, Chase,” she said, her voice different. Lowered. Not whispered, but more hurt. Like she was upset.
“What are you doing?” he asked, trying to feel her out.
“Just working. I’m really busy. I just got off the phone with my agent. He suggested I start traveling again when I told him my latest idea. I’m thinking it’s time I get out there.”
His heart was racing now. “Traveling where? When? For how long?”
“I’m not sure. I’m making the arrangements now. I’m going to bring Calvin with me. I’ll probably leave the first of the year.”
He wasn’t sure what to say. Maybe he shouldn’t have called her. “Would you have told me this tonight?”
“Of course. But you called and it seemed like the time.”
“What’s wrong with your voice?” he asked. “You sound nasally.”
“Thanks,” she said, laughing, but it wasn’t a happy sound. “Just feeling under the weather. We need to talk tonight.”
“About what?” he asked. He was waiting to see if she brought it up.
“Just us. I’m going to be traveling and well...”
“You want space,” he said, finishing for her, making him realize that he never knew her at all. That everything he hoped for had been wrong. That it was all in his head from day one.
“We’ll talk tonight,” she said again.
“Don’t bother. I get it. Enjoy yourself.” He hung up. The urge to put his fist through the wall was great, but he held back.
He never should have let himself fall for her. He should have known better. He wasn’t good enough and it seemed good old Kelly just pointed it out to her.
Completely False
“That is the stupidest thing you’ve ever done, Noelle.”
“Thanks, Mom. Just what I needed to hear. As if I don’t feel bad enough as it is.”
“You’ve never let tabloids bother you before. Why now? I don’t get it,” her mother said, placing a cup of tea in front of her.
It’d been three days since she’d talked to Chase. She’d wanted to go see him with a desperation that a starving actor felt when they were down to their last two dollars.
But she didn’t. What would she say to him? What could she say to him? He made it clear he didn’t
want to talk. That he didn’t want her. He was probably pissed off on the poor reflection this could have on his shelter. The thing that was the most important in his life.
“He didn’t need to be dragged into this mess.”
“What mess? So some reporter used his shelter to get a story on you. Not surprising the lengths that people will go to to make a buck. You learned that with Ricardo.”
“And that’s another thing,” Noelle said. “That was years ago and completely false. I dropped his ass when I found out he was cheating on me. When he was looking for anyone to help him get his name out there. I could have gone to the press back then, and chose not to. That would give him attention that he was craving.”
“He never spoke of your breakup either,” her mother pointed out. “Do you know why?”
“No clue,” Noelle said, not really caring at this point. All she cared about was that something from her past ruined the one good thing she’d had in years. The start of what she’d been planning on her whole life. This was what she’d feared would happen even though she’d thought she’d done everything to avoid it.
“I’m going to tell you why,” her mother said. “Because I threatened to bring him down. I threatened him with a lawsuit that would not only cripple him but ruin his name in the modeling world forever if he ever spoke one word of your relationship to the press. And since he knew he was in the wrong and had the most to lose, he chose the high road.”
“Why didn’t you tell me you did that?” Her mother always talked about actions speaking louder and finding the right time to act. She was guessing that was the right time.
“There was no need. You modeled longer than you said you would. I knew you were burning out. Your father and I were trying to figure out a way to talk you into taking a break. When you found out what you did about Ricardo, we knew it was the last straw. That you found your way out.”
“I didn’t stop right then. I didn’t want anyone to think I was quitting and he was the reason,” she argued.
She had been heartbroken like she’d never thought she’d be. But the truth was, she knew long before she found out Ricardo was cheating that he wasn’t the one for her. That he didn’t see his future the same as she saw hers.