I lock the deadbolt behind me to keep him out and also in an attempt to lock out my inner thoughts.
With a graceless plop, I make myself comfortable on the couch, flipping on the TV. I dig my phone out of my purse and my heart sputters in my chest before picking up in double speed.
Chase: Congrats on the white coat ceremony. I hope it brings you all the happiness in the world, Red.
It’s the first time I’ve heard from Chase in eight months. Is he being snarky or is he actually wishing me the best? I screenshot the message and fire off a text to Kenzie so she can tell me what to say back, if anything at all.
But like the clueless, fumbling idiot I have a tendency to be, I send the screenshot back to Chase. Dear God, why am I like this? He knows me well enough that I might as well be honest with him.
Hailey: Oh hahaha oops I meant to send that to Kenzie…
I lock my phone and toss it on the other side of the couch like the lunatic I am. I try to get lost watching Sex and the City, but after several minutes curiosity gets the best of me. Of course he already responded, dammit.
Chase: Why do you need to send my texts to her?
Why are you being so defensive? While I want to ask him that, I refrain.
Hailey: Because I’m a girl and that’s what we do.
Why did he reach out to me now after all these months? Did he somehow sense I was living next to a hot guy and wanted to get under my skin again? What about Laila? Shouldn’t he be busy getting under her skin?
Before he can respond, I fire off another message to end the conversation. He’s making me go bat shit crazy while having barely said two sentences to me.
Hailey: Thank you, Chase. I appreciate you thinking of me.
There. I said my piece and we can both move on—son of a bitch he replied again.
Chase: It’s no big deal, Red. I’m always thinking of you.
Dammit. Why, why, why? Why can’t this be easy? Why did he have to run to her? Why did I have to end things in the first place? It’s my biggest mistake. I never should’ve ended things, and I regret it every damn day.
And now it’s too late to go back.
22
Chase
My messages with Hailey didn’t go as planned and left me with a sour taste in my mouth. The minute Hunter gets home from his sister’s med school ceremony I declare a state of emergency on our friendship and demand he come over immediately. When the doorbell rings, I swing open the door and allow my best friend into my house.
He lifts his right arm, which holds a six pack of Miller Lite. Thank fuck. I crack one open and chug half of it down before beginning the inevitable inquisition.
“How is she?” I don’t have to say her name for him to know I’m talking about Hailey. I’ve been jealous I couldn’t go down there with him and support her at this ceremony. I should’ve been there.
“Good. She looks good, happy.” He won’t look me in the eye, which is sketchy. Something else is up.
“What is it, dude? Just tell me.” I down the rest of my beer, knowing I won’t like what he has to say.
“I think she might be dating someone. She didn’t introduce him as her boyfriend or anything but they’re neighbors, and there’s no doubt in my mind he’s into her, anyway.”
Why wouldn’t he be into her? She’s the whole fucking package. Son of a bitch.
I crush the can in my palm. She dumps me because she wants to focus on school only for her to jump into bed with her fucking neighbor the minute she gets a chance? Why couldn’t she be with me then? Was it just her excuse?
“You okay, bro?” He claps a palm on my shoulder.
“How the hell do you think I am?” I open another cold one, but it doesn’t do anything to thwart my anger or disappointment.
“Want me to have Kenzie talk to her?”
Am I that pathetic that I need to outsource my groveling?
“No. She deserves to be happy.” Even if it’s not with me.
“You need to get back out there, dude. I know I gave you shit before, but it’s been what, almost a year now? It’s time to move on. Hailey did and now it’s your turn.” He has a point even if I don’t want to hear it.
“You’re right. It’s about damn time. You know anyone?” It’s a long shot, but it’s better than going to a bar and trolling around like I’m back in college. I’m too old for that shit.
“Actually, I think I do. The new secretary in my office might be perfect for you. Plus, she makes Kenzie a little nervous, so if she starts dating you it’ll get her off my back. Both of them. Her name’s Vanessa and she’s in law school, but from the way she hits on me I’d say she’s ready for a commitment. I’ll set you two up on a date next weekend.”
“You want me to go on a blind date?” What year is this, 1992?
“Why the hell not? What’s the worst that can happen?” It’s a rhetorical question and yet my mind floods with all the worst-case scenarios.
“Whatever, man. Sign me up and let me know the time and place.” I open my third Miller and turn on the TV. “Football’s on. Wanna stay and watch the game?”
“Sorry man, but I have to get going. You good, bro?”
No, but I won’t be a little bitch and tell him that.
“Yup all good. Let me know about next weekend.”
◊◊◊
By the time Friday rolls around, I’m ready for the weekend. It’s my first week back at school since summer ended and the students are hellish. It’s bound to be one exhausting year and we’re only five days in.
Hunter: Reservations made at The City Bistro tomorrow at 7.
Right, my blind date is tomorrow. I almost forgot.
Chase: Cool thanks.
It’ll be nice to get out of the house and stop moping around like a broken-hearted pansy ass for a change. The temptation to text Hailey is strong, but I ignore it. I should delete her number to help myself move on. It’s beyond the point of pathetic now.
When Saturday comes, I shave and shower despite not having any desire to go on this date. I pick out a simple shirt to go with jeans and pray the night goes by swiftly. Because I’m a gentleman, I pick up a bouquet of flowers before heading to the restaurant. I’m going in blind. Hunter wouldn’t even tell me what color her freaking hair is, as if that would give anything away.
I’m waiting in the lobby with flowers, looking pathetic like a guy who just got stood up. It’s embarrassing. Five minutes after seven, when I’m ready to call it quits, a gorgeous brunette walks through the door. Her long chestnut hair is in curls down her back and she has curves for days.
She looks lost as she glances around the space. “Vanessa?” I call out in hopes it’s her. I’m tired of standing here like a freaking idiot.
“Chase?” I nod and peruse her as she walks over. Her smile is pearly white and broad and lights up her entire face.
Her lips are red which remind me of a certain blonde I can’t seem to get out of my head, but I push past the nostalgia. She’s wearing a short shimmery silver dress that, even though she’s on the shorter side, exposes a lot of her toned legs. As I embrace her petite frame, a genuine smile pulls at my lips for the first time in months.
“It’s nice to meet you. I wish I could say I heard a lot about you, but Hunter was pretty quiet.” I hand over the classic red roses and she inhales their scent.
“Thank you for the flowers. They’re beautiful.”
The hostess leads us to a table in an intimate back corner.
First dates are almost always awkward and blind dates are even worse. My first date with Hailey wasn’t this bad. We connected with ease and the conversation flowed out of us. Blind first dates are filled with small talk to get to know one another, nothing substantial.
“What do you do for a living?” It seems Hunter kept his mouth shut about me too, didn’t he?
“I teach calculus at Woodbridge High and I’m also the ice hockey coach.” I unfold my napkin and place it on my lap while I try to be nonchalan
t as I search around for the waitress.
“My little sister is a senior at Woodbridge. She must be in your calculus class. She told me her math teacher was hot.” She raises her eyebrows and laughs, taking a sip of water.
“I’ll keep an eye out for her.” It’s my first week back. I haven’t memorized my students yet.
The conversation flows slow and steady, albeit boring, and I’m grateful when our waitress takes our order.
“You have to give me something here.” I look up into her chocolaty brown eyes with confusion. “I feel like I’m pulling teeth trying to get you to open up and I’m using all my best lawyer tricks on you.” She winks which only throws me off more. “If you don’t want to be on this date, I understand. I wasn’t jumping for joy either when Hunter told me he was setting me up on a blind date. I just got out of a long-term relationship myself, not that Hunter knows that because he never asked. Either we can sit here and drag our way through a quiet, painful dinner or we can at least try to make the best of a shitty situation and have fun. What do you say?”
Taking a large drink of my beer, I consider the options. She sounds like Hailey, only wanting to have fun. I’ve had enough fun in my life. Now I’m ready for something serious and to settle down. But at the end of the day, I’m still a man and Vanessa is smart and attractive.
“What kind of fun did you have in mind?”
◊◊◊
I wake up to the sound of Galantis on my phone because in the short time Hailey and I were together, she got me into her ridiculous morning ritual habit. I haven’t gotten around to turning it off yet.
Last night turned out better than I thought it would. For a soon-to-be lawyer, Vanessa knows how to have fun. Still, I woke up alone in my own bed so the date wasn’t that good.
Vanessa: I had fun last night. I’d love to go out again.
Vanessa’s text shocks me. It’s impossible to find a woman who knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to text first. Maybe I’ll keep seeing her after all.
23
Hailey
I turn off my alarm, the sound of Solo by Clean Bandit and Demi Lovato blaring despite not having gotten any sleep. Med school is hard. The days blur into weeks which blur into months of nonstop studying and working. This is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do and exams all but kill me, though, I am grateful for Landon helping me study. He’s already gone through his first year and can tell me all the tips and tricks.
Aside from Christmas and a few weekend visits from Kenzie, I’ve barely been home at all or seen my family since school started and that was almost a year ago now. Much to Kenzie’s dismay, I still haven’t slept with or even made a move on my fuck-hot next door neighbor. My willpower is unwavering though his advances haven’t slowed down at all. Our one-year deadline is also coming fast, which means I’ll have to go on a date with him. I could bail, but I’m a Blake and Blake’s aren’t quitters.
A knock sounds on my apartment door and despite the fact it’s not even ten in the morning, I’m sure it’s Landon ready to take on the day.
“Be right there,” I call to the person behind the door.
Brushing my teeth at sonic speed and throwing on a hoodie, I open the door. To my pleasant surprise, it’s not my nosy neighbor after all.
“Hunt, what are you doing here?” I throw my arms around my brother in a big bear hug and welcome him into my place.
“Killing two birds with one stone. I wanted to see my baby sister but I also need your help.” He’s nervous, which is an unusual sight. He runs a hand through his messy blonde hair and lets out a heavy breath. “I want to propose to Kenz and I need your help picking out the ring.”
My screech can be heard on Mars and I’m sure my downstairs neighbors don’t appreciate my emphatic jumping. “I know exactly what she wants. Do you know her ring size? Doesn’t matter, I think I know it, anyway. When are you going to do it? And how? It has to be perfect. Oh my God, she’s going to flip. I’m gonna have a sister! I’m going to be maid of honor! I need to start working on my speech.”
“Calm down. I haven’t even asked her yet. Don’t go getting all ahead of yourself. How do you know you’ll be maid of honor?” I give him a look that says are you dumb? Of course I’ll be standing beside her on her wedding day.
My best friend is getting married. This is the day we’ve been dreaming about since we were little girls.
“I plan to make it simple but special. You know how you can see the city skyline from my backyard? I’m going to hang string lights and set candles to illuminate the space. As the sun goes down, I’ll drop to my knee and ask her.” My eyes flood with unshed tears at the simple but beautiful plan my brother has concocted. My parents raised a good man.
“Give me fifteen minutes to get ready. Then we’re going shopping.”
Another knock sounds on my door before the knob spins and is pushed open.
“Is everything okay in here?” Landon is outside my door with a golf club. I didn’t even know he was a golfer. “I heard you scream and ran over.”
“Everything is perfect. You remember my brother, Hunter, right? We’re spending the day together so whatever rigorous study schedule you have planned today, cancel it. I’ll see you later.” I leave the door open and run to the bathroom to shower.
Mumblings of the guys talking get drowned out once the water is turned on. I’ll worry about my neighbor later.
Thoughts of proposals and weddings consume my shower. I’m daydreaming of the day I get married and who will stand across from me on that day. Last year I would’ve sworn Chase and I were meant to be, but maybe now my future kids will be raven-haired cuties instead. It’s something to consider.
I run out of my bathroom wrapped in a towel and hear a whistle from my living room. My head swivels and my brother is still there talking to Landon.
“Landon! Get out!” I’m not used to having a bathroom separate from my bedroom. Even though I’m wrapped in a towel, it’s a bit indecent for my neighbor to see me in, especially since I know he likes me.
In a flash—no pun intended—I dart to my room and get dressed. For once in my life I don’t take ages to get ready, too eager to spend time with my big bro instead of perfecting my winged eyeliner.
“Ready to go?” My brother asks, looking chummy with my neighbor. A bromance has commenced in my living room.
Hunter walks over to me as I fill up a tumbler with coffee. “Do you want him to tag along?” he whispers.
“No. I want to spend the day with you. It’s been too long since we’ve spent quality time together and you drove all this way to see me, not my neighbor.” I roll my eyes at the thought, but my brother smirks.
“He’s still just your neighbor then?” I smack his bicep for being nosy.
“Yes. Now let’s go.” I close the lid on my hot java and escort my friend out the door. “I’ll see you later, Landon.” He waves and I push my brother down the hallway.
“Where are the best shops around here?” I can tell he’s nervous, though I don’t know why. He has nothing to worry about. He could get a ring from a vending machine and Kenzie would say yes.
“You’ve come to the right girl.” I direct him to the closest mall and we hit all the big ring shops, but we’re not finding anything that screams Kenzie.
After several hours, we stop at a diner for lunch and it’s obvious the frustration of the day is eating away at my brother. He keeps running a hand through his hair, making it unruly. A frown rests on his lips and his eyes look past me, unfocused.
“What are you so worried about? Anything you buy will be more than enough for her. She will love it even if it’s a marble sitting on her finger.” That earns me half a laugh, but his brows are still pulled down in concern.
The waitress comes to take our order and as soon as she leaves, Hunter explains.
“I want it to be perfect. I feel like there’s more pressure on me since I was engaged to Alison not all that long ago. I don’t want that to take away fro
m this engagement.” He sighs, and it’s a broken sound and I know Alison brings up a lot of sorrow for him. “Proposing to Kenzie is… different than it was when I asked Ali. The circumstances are different. I wish like hell Ali and I didn’t lose the baby. Sawyer. Did I tell you his name was Sawyer?” He chokes up and tears of my own well in my eyes.
I shake my head. “No, you didn’t.” My nephew’s name was Sawyer. Even though Alison is the devil-incarnate, I hate knowing I lost a nephew and Hunter lost a son. No one should ever have to suffer through that type of loss.
“I feel guilty being so excited to move on with Kenzie. I could have a kid right now, Hails. It still fucking hurts.” I reach across the table to hold his hand just as the waitress brings us our lunch.
Hunter clears his throat and says thank you and she’s hasty in her departure. I don’t blame her. If I was a waitress, I wouldn’t want to get involved in a customer’s drama either.
“You’re moving on, Hunter. No one can blame you for that. You’ll have a minivan-full of babies with Kenzie and even then, you’ll never forget about Sawyer. And that is okay. But you can’t stop yourself from being happy just because something horrible happened. Your baby wouldn’t want that for you.”
My brother takes a long sip of water, forcibly pushing aside his emotions. He nods and the sadness in his gaze breaks my heart. It will always be there, buried under his skin, but I hope he can find peace with Mackenzie.
We’ve gone from the excitement of ring shopping to depressed and I’m eager to lift our spirits. “So, you and Landon were buddy-buddy back there.” I hope my change of subject is distraction enough.
“What’s going on with him, anyway? You know he’s into you.” I roll my eyes.
“Nothing is going on with him and it’s going to stay that way. I’m not looking for a relationship. You of all people should know that.” I slip up, referencing Chase and I regret it instantly.
Chasing Red Page 15