Shelby scanned the water. “Look, Daddy! I spy with my little eye a dolphin.”
“Way to go, Shelby. Let’s see if you can spy a turtle.”
The fish were biting, which was a good thing because Kate wanted to serve the fresh catch to their party guests that evening. “What if we come back empty-handed?” he’d asked, coming up behind her to nuzzle her neck.
She laughed. “Then I’ll send you back out again.”
Steve pulled in a giant snapper, and Shelby squealed as it flopped around on the floor of the boat until Chad put it on ice.
“Kate will be happy to see that one,” Ian said.
“I’ll be happy to eat it as long as you’re the one who’s going to clean it,” Steve said good-naturedly.
“That’s me: boat driver and fish cleaner.”
After the accident, it had been hard for Ian to be in the same room as Steve because he hadn’t been angry the way he’d been after Ian had faked his death. Ian would have welcomed the anger because the silence was worse. Steve hadn’t spoken to him at all for a while, which had bothered Kate and Diane immensely, but he understood. Steve needed time to process what had happened, and nothing he could have said or done would even begin to touch the anguish and remorse Ian carried around in his head and his heart for a good long time. Eventually, both of them learned to let go of the negative emotions associated with the crash, and their relationship knitted itself back together in the way it often did with men.
Ian never returned to the task force after the blackout.
“What do you think Mommy’s doing?” Ian asked when they got home two hours later, hungry, hot, and ready for lunch.
“Probably feeding the baby. She’s always feeding him.”
He tugged gently on one of Shelby’s long brown braids. “Maybe we should feed you.”
“I’m starving for ice cream.”
Diane came outside. “Oh, you’re back. Are you hungry, Shelby?”
“She’s starving,” Ian said.
“For ice cream,” Shelby added.
“Your mommy and I made lunch while you were gone. You wanna come eat with Aunt Kristin and Cousin Molly?” Chad and Kristin had a three-year-old daughter and a son on the way.
Shelby took her hand. “Okay, Grandma.”
“You can have ice cream for dessert. Maybe we’ll eat that first.”
He walked down the hallway to the master bedroom. Shelby was right. Kate was attempting to nurse their son, which she’d said was like trying to hit a bull’s-eye on a constantly moving target, especially since he’d started walking a month ago. He watched them for a moment, thinking he must have done something awfully right to end up here.
When Spyder spotted him in the doorway, he lurched off Kate’s lap and ran toward Ian. Kate laughed. “I give up.”
Ian crouched down. “How’s my birthday boy? You ready to party?” Dressed in nothing but a diaper, his spiky bedhead stuck up in all directions as he grinned and drooled.
When Chad and Kristin had come to visit Kate in the hospital, her brother said, “Hey, Spyder,” when Ian placed their son in his arms.
“Chad!” Kate admonished from her hospital bed.
“What? Isn’t that what you guys do? Name your kids after your cars?”
“His name is William, after Ian’s dad. We’re going to call him Will.”
But at his three-month checkup, he was seventy-five percent for weight but completely off the chart for height.
“He’s all limbs,” the nurse said. She smiled at Ian. “Probably going to be tall like his father.”
Ian scrutinized his son. “You know his body does have a certain—”
“Don’t say it.”
“Spiderlike quality.”
Kate laughed. “And you said it. I was actually thinking the exact same thing a few weeks ago when I was changing his diaper.”
Maybe Kate wouldn’t want to be reminded of the Spyder. When Ian asked her if the nickname would bother her, she assured him it didn’t. “I will always remember how excited you were when you gave me that car. That’s what I think of when I hear the word Spyder. I’ll be sure to let Chad know it was our son’s arms and legs that inspired the nickname and not my car. I don’t want him to think he was right.”
There had been no more cars, and a golf cart was the fastest vehicle either of them drove these days.
“What time does the plane land?” Kate asked.
“Rob’s picking everyone up at five. You excited?”
“I can’t wait,” she said as she kissed Ian and scooped up twenty pounds of squirming, laughing towheaded baby and headed for the door. “I’ll be right back. I promised Susan she could give Spyder his bath.”
She was dressed for the tropical weather in a thin-strapped tank top and knee-length skirt, and her long legs looked tan and strong. Because she’d opted to delay surgery, her ankle had not healed well, and when Shelby arrived six days after her due date—healthy and perfect—Kate had been terrified that her leg would give out and she would drop her. Diane had stayed with them for the first month, and either she or Ian would bring Shelby to Kate when it was time to feed her. At night, when Shelby would stir, Ian would carefully lift his daughter from her bassinet in their bedroom and would whisper to her in the darkness as he placed her in Kate’s arms. Afterward, he would change her diaper and put her back in the bassinet. When Shelby was three months old, the doctor rebroke Kate’s ankle so he could set it properly. It had taken almost a year for the limp to disappear completely, and sometimes when she was really tired, he could still see an almost imperceptible difference in her gait.
And it would always be a painful reminder of how close he’d come to losing her.
He’d brought Kate and Shelby to Costa Rica when Shelby was six months old and it had become apparent to everyone that something was wrong with Kate. She’d lost weight, and she was having trouble sleeping. Though she tried her best to hide it, she seemed listless and sad, as if the light had gone out of her. Whether it was a lingering postpartum effect, too many traumatic memories, or the problems she’d had with her leg, he wasn’t sure. But he needed to find a way to help her, and Costa Rica had been a shot in the dark when nothing else seemed to be working. They’d flown down for a week’s visit, and the change in Kate had been almost instantaneous as the weight of what she’d been carrying lifted and she came alive again before his eyes.
“Can we stay?” she’d asked him one morning after sleeping through the night for the first time in a long while.
He was spooning her the way he always had and the way he always would. “Would you like that?”
“Yes,” she’d whispered.
And so they’d stayed, because he would have given her anything she asked for. Kate never set foot in the Middleburg house again, and Ian sent the movers to box up the contents and send everything to them.
Costa Rica had been good for him too, and he’d done his own share of healing here.
He imagined they would stay forever.
They bought property in Malpais, a remote cattle-farming and fishing village with white-sand beaches, lush jungles teeming with wildlife and birds, and breathtaking views that had become one of Costa Rica’s hidden jewels and drew adventure travelers from around the world.
They’d purchased land on the coast with a long stretch of private shoreline. They built a large, one-level home, and when that was complete they added several small guesthouses accessible by well-lit stone paths to ensure there would always be room for visitors. Renee had agreed to come with them now that her own children had moved to opposite sides of the country, and she had her own private bungalow.
Ian was reasonably certain the hacktivists believed he was dead, and with Zach Nielsen no longer proving a threat to his family, he could breathe easy for the first time in years. But he wasn’t taking any chances, and he’d convinced Rob to come with them too. He did all the driving, ferrying Kate and the kids down the pothole-filled dirt roads to the airport
or into town.
Ian finally bought a plane of his own and kept a pilot on standby, and Indiana was by far the most frequent destination.
They would always be cautious about who they shared their personal information with, but there were a few people Ian felt it was safe for Kate to get in contact with, and he encouraged her to make the calls. The first were Paige and Audrey, and to say the revelation stunned her friends was an understatement.
“I’m almost positive they thought they were being punked,” Kate told him. It wasn’t until Ian flew them and their families down to see Kate that they’d finally believed her.
Next, Kate told Helena. “I married a man and we live in Costa Rica. I would love for you and Bert to come for a visit. We’ll fly you down. We have plenty of room.”
“I would love to see you if you’re sure it’s not too much trouble,” Helena said.
“It’s no trouble at all.”
Kate worried the news might be too much for Helena. Before they went inside the house, she turned to her and Bert. “I have something I need to tell you.”
“I hope it’s nothing bad,” Helena said, looking worried.
Kate’s eyes filled with tears and she reached for Helena’s hands, squeezing them tight. “It’s something wonderful. I feel horrible that I’ve been keeping this from you for so long, but Ian is waiting for us inside.”
Helena’s eyes grew wide as saucers, and the news rendered her and Bert speechless. They looked more than a little apprehensive, and Bert finally said, “What do you mean by that, Kate?”
“I mean that he didn’t die when his car went into the river. He wasn’t even in it.” Kate explained about Ian’s work with the task force and the doxing, and by the time she’d finished, Helena couldn’t wait to get inside the house. When she threw her arms around Ian, she burst into tears and so did Kate. Shelby was a year old then, and when Kate fetched her from her crib where she’d been napping, Helena lost it. No matter how hard she tried to compose herself, she cried spontaneous and intermittent tears of joy for the next twenty-four hours.
They showed Helena the picture Ian took of Ted Lawson, the man they’d found on their property, and asked if she’d ever seen him.
“That’s Ronnie. Why do you have a picture of him? Is he okay?”
“We think he might have been looking for us.”
Helena’s face fell. “I never told anybody where you’d gone. I remembered what you said before you left, Kate, so I was extra careful.”
Kate reached for Helena’s hands. “I know you didn’t. You did exactly what I asked.”
The only thing the police had been able to charge Ted Lawson with was trespassing, and after they released him, he likely hadn’t stuck around. They would never know whether he had any knowledge of Zach Nielsen’s larger plan or if he’d been paid handsomely not to ask questions. Zach Nielsen was actually a man named Mike Nelson, and his body had been claimed by his next of kin after the hospital unraveled his identity based on information they found in his wallet. Ian had many regrets about everything that had happened that day, but what he’d done to Zach’s seat belt and air bag would never be one of them.
He was sitting on the deck watching Shelby and Molly play when their guests arrived and started making their way outside after stopping in the house to greet Kate. His mother was first.
Ian went to her and she hugged him tight. “How was the flight?”
“It was so smooth. Your plane is lovely, and there was room for all of us.”
Shelby spotted her grandmother. “Grandma Ellen! Grandma Ellen!” His mom’s face lit up when Shelby threw herself into her grandmother’s arms. “I have a new song to sing for you!”
She hugged Shelby and kissed her cheek. “I can’t wait to hear it.”
His daughter knew nothing of the rocky past between her father and grandmother, and she never would. All that mattered was that she knew there were many people who loved her.
He had Kate to thank for the reconciliation. She’d insisted on mailing a birth announcement, and no one had been more surprised than him when his mother called. He’d often wondered if she still had his number.
She wanted to know if he could come home. “Just for a short visit. I’m sure you’re very busy.”
At Kate’s urging, he’d agreed. “You won’t truly find peace unless you can forgive her. But tell her how you feel. Don’t keep anything in.”
He’d flown to Amarillo, rented a nondescript, midsize car, and met his mother at an IHOP off I-40. She fidgeted in the booth, spinning a gold wedding ring on her finger.
He gestured to her left hand. “What’s he like?” He knew so little about her current life and nothing about the man she’d married after he left home.
“His name was Walter. He was a wonderful man, but he died last year. Heart attack.”
“I’m sorry. Do you have someone in your life now?” He needed to know if the real reason she’d reached out to him was because there was no one left.
“Yes. I can’t bury another husband, and boyfriend sounds silly at my age. But he’s a good companion, and I’m grateful for his company.”
“Then I’m happy for you.”
“Did you bring some pictures of the baby?” she asked, and there was such yearning in her voice.
He reached into an envelope and withdrew several photos in a variety of sizes. “We had these taken about a week after Shelby was born.”
She looked as if he’d presented her with a precious gift. When she’d had her fill, she slid them back to him.
“They’re for you to keep, Mom.” He handed her his phone. “There’s a whole bunch more if you want to page through them.”
“She’s beautiful. So is your wife. She looks very kind,” his mom said when she handed the phone back to him.
“Kate is many things. Kind and beautiful are just two of them.”
As they sat in the corner of the restaurant sharing a meal for the first time since he’d left home, his mother began to reminisce about how happy his own birth had made her. “We were quite young, but we were so eager to become parents. I remember how proud I was the day we brought you home from the hospital. Your dad told anyone who would listen that his son was going to do amazing things someday.”
Ian smiled because his dad had said those words to him many times.
“There was a small theater company in downtown Amarillo. It’s long gone now, but from the time I was fifteen years old, there was never a production I wasn’t a part of. Sometimes I had the lead, sometimes I was the understudy. A few times I had small parts, and once I volunteered to help with the sets so I could still be involved. I loved it all, but musicals were where I really shined. All my life people had been telling me how special my voice was and that someday I’d go far with it.”
Ian remembered coming across an old scrapbook in the basement once. In it were playbills and pictures of his mother wearing different costumes. He hadn’t paid much attention to it back then because no one ever talked about it with him.
“Six months after you were born, your dad encouraged me to return to the theater so I could get out of the house in the evening, and I got the role of Velma in Chicago. News spread quickly that a Hollywood scout would be in the audience on opening night, and after the show the theater director pulled me aside and introduced us. He filled my head with all kinds of things and wanted me to move to California for a few months so I could go on auditions and have a screen test, but I told him I had a baby. He said I should leave it at home. Your dad was already working long hours to support us, and I didn’t have anyone I trusted enough to take good care of you while I was gone. It didn’t matter, because I couldn’t bear the thought of being separated from you. My understudy flew out instead, and she never came back. I still see her face in magazines sometimes.”
He knew in his heart she’d tried to stop it. But once the seeds of resentment had been sown, they’d likely grown stronger and flourished with each passing year away from the sp
otlight.
“I never stopped loving you, Ian.”
“I reached out to you so many times. And every time you turned me away.”
“I didn’t think I deserved to be in your life after the way I treated you.”
Ian remembered Kate’s words. “That’s not how we measure love.”
“I’m sorry. Missing out on all this time with you is my life’s biggest regret.”
Before they got into their respective cars in the parking lot, Ian said, “I’d like for you to visit us. Get to know Kate. Spend time with Shelby.”
His mother had started crying then, and she’d been coming to visit ever since.
Shelby led his mother away so she could listen to her song. Phillip and Susan appeared next. They’d no doubt spent some time inside with Steve and Diane, whom they’d gotten to know quite well in the past few years. Phillip had retired at fifty-seven—mandatory for the FBI—and he and Susan enjoyed frequent visits to Costa Rica. Shelby called them Nana and Papa and liked to tell people she had extra grandparents.
Charlie appeared on the deck last. He shook Ian’s hand, plopped down in the empty chair next to him, and handed him a beer. “You sure have a lot of women in your house. They gave me these beers and told me I was in their way. Better keep ’em coming all weekend, Smith. You still owe me.”
“It’s Bradshaw and you know it.”
“I always forget which one I’m supposed to use.”
“That’s the only one you need now.” Ian took a drink of his beer. “Where’s your better half? I’m surprised she hasn’t made it out here to say hello to me yet.”
“Are you kidding? I’m sure there’s a bottle of wine being passed around the kitchen table as we speak. They’re probably on their second by now.”
It turned out that Kate was right: Charlie wasn’t such a player after all, and he’d married Jade two years ago in a sunset ceremony on Kate and Ian’s very own white-sand beach. Charlie did have some reservations about settling down, but they had nothing to do with how he felt about Jade.
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