by Kadin, Karri
The bubbling stopped; Catherine’s eyes were fixed forward, unblinking in a dead stare. Allison collapsed to the ground near Trevor as she stared at the deep red blood staining Catherine’s golden hair. Allison’s limbs warmed as the heat spread through her body; her eyes rolled back into her head as she fell to the ground thrashing. The flashback hit her hard. A girl with blonde hair trying to talk to her, calling her name. The girl was telling her everything will be okay, asking her to just please calm down. The girl was blurred out of vision so Allison took a few steps forward hoping for things to clear. Her mind was jumbled, everything was confusing. She needed something, the only thing that mattered. Food, food was nearby and Allison needed it. Allison knew this girl. The girl was Gabby. Gabby reached out, trying to calm her. Allison lunged toward her, she lunged for Gabby. She heard Gabby scream as the flashback started to break apart. The familiar warm, irony blood filled Allison’s mouth as she slowly pulled herself from the flashback. Through the fog Trevor was screaming her name, holding her in his arms, trying to keep her from hurting herself as her body thrashed. Her eyes opened to Trevor’s tear-streamed face above hers. He smiled, grasping her head between his hands as he pressed his forehead to hers.
“I thought you were dying! Oh my god. Are you okay?” His voice trembled as he spoke. He didn’t let go of her. Allison sat up using Trevor for support. Her mouth was full of liquid so she spat it onto the sidewalk leaving a small pool of blood. “Open,” Trevor said as he examined her mouth. “You bit your tongue with all the thrashing you were doing. It’s not too bad, though.” He pulled her into a tight embrace and Allison buried her head into his neck, sobbing. Gabby. Poor Gabby. I didn’t do that. I couldn’t.
Chapter Twenty
Allison
The friends loaded their battered bodies and newly found supplies back into their truck. They needed to recuperate but they couldn’t risk staying. If Catherine knew where they were, chances were Dr. Neff did too, and he would come looking for them when Catherine didn’t return. They didn’t want to be here when Dr. Neff’s reinforcements arrived.
Matt awoke after a few splashes of water to his face. He was nauseated, fatigued—classic signs of a concussion, which worried them all. They had no idea where the next populated town was or if it even had a doctor. Morgan kept him talking in the truck as they drove to keep him awake. Matt insisted he was fine, that he had concussions before and this one was minor, but everyone worried anyway. Morgan clung to her brother’s side, jumping with every movement he made.
I killed again. I said I wouldn’t, but I did. Bile filled Allison’s mouth and she forced it back down in one large gulp. This wasn’t the same. It’s not the same. Her knuckles turned white as she held the wheel, her mind racing.
“Are you okay?” Trevor asked.
“No. I never wanted to hurt anyone again and I just did.”
“You hurt people to save us. You did the right thing. And those weren’t good people.” Trevor rested his hand on her thigh. Allison nodded, but a knot of guilt tightened in her chest.
“I think that Kevin guy was a former Infected. He was almost as strong as me even though I was all raged out.”
“I can’t imagine Dr. Neff having a former Infected work for him. But I have heard that some people in Zone 5 are experimenting with the virus. Trying to create super soldiers.”
“That is fucking insane.”
“Yeah it is. If the rumors are true the Operational Chief Manager of Zone 5 is Dr. Neff’s wife, Dr. Natasha Scott. It would make sense for her to supply him with some of her creepy experimental offspring. Like a field test or some shit.” Trevor squeezed her thigh and Allison nodded.
As they followed the curve of the road Allison saw an indention in the foliage, on the right of the road. A signpost sat in front of it with the sign on the ground. She slowed to a stop in front of the break, looking off into it.
“What is it?” Trevor raised his eyebrows questioningly while he leaned forward to get a better look at what Allison was staring at.
“I’m not sure but this feels . . . familiar,” Allison said as she opened the truck door and stepped out. She briskly walked over to the downed sign and picked it up. It read “Great Falls Recreational Area.”
“I think we are near the cabin, near where I was first infected.” She dropped the sign. The old entrance to the recreation center was overgrown now, easy to miss, but it had been a road at some point. Allison hopped back into the truck and began inching it into the forest. The old truck did well until about a mile in when they hit a patch of deep mud and the tires sunk in halfway.
“There is no getting it out without another vehicle’s help.” Trevor leaned back against the tailgate next to Allison.
“We could get some branches to put under the tires. Give them something to grab onto,” Morgan said from the driver’s seat as she turned the engine off.
“Or you fuckers could let me help push the thing out,” Matt said from his seat beneath a tree.
“You look like you were hit by a truck. You don’t need to be pushing one.” Morgan shook her finger at her brother. “I think the wood is worth a try.”
“It’s just too deep,” Trevor pointed at his pants covered in mud up to his knees. “We couldn’t get the branches far enough under them for it to work.” Morgan shrugged and began pulling their things from the cab.
“Allison could get all ragey and push it out herself.” Matt smirked.
“Not gonna happen. Besides it doesn’t really work like that.” Allison said and tossed a handful of mud at Matt’s legs. He flipped her off, a smile spread across his bruised face.
Allison stepped away from the truck, almost losing her boot in the mud. There were a few picnic tables with covered awnings and cast-iron grills in concrete bases that were still in good shape and not too overgrown. They were completely hidden from the road, surrounded by tall grass and large trees.
“I think we should camp here for the night. We all need rest, especially Matt,” Trevor said as he surveyed the area. “I’ll go make sure you can’t tell anyone is here from the road.” He waited for everyone to nod in agreement before jogging off back down the way they came.
Allison and Morgan unloaded the things they needed to set up camp. Matt tried to help but they both refused to let him, forcing him to sit down and rest. Trevor returned and helped the girls set up camp. Morgan’s concern for her brother never wavered as she continued to fret over him. She brought him water and crackers, insisting he eat. Every time he looked like he might fall asleep she yelled his name, resulting in a cold stare. She was never more than a few feet from him, always close enough to be by his side at a moment’s notice. He didn’t quite hide his annoyance at being babied.
“While I was walking I saw some wild blackberries. I can take a bag back and gather some. It would be nice to have some fresh fruit.” Trevor looked at Allison, seemingly hoping she would offer to join him.
“Morgan, you should go with him,” Matt said abruptly, waving his hand toward Trevor.
“But I want to stay with you. I . . .” Morgan began to protest.
“I’m fine. You need to get away for a bit. A walk would be good for you. Allison will stay with me. Now go on and get us some blackberries.” Matt spoke firmly as he leaned back against the awning’s support beam and took a sip of water. Morgan huffed but grabbed a bag before following Trevor down the path back toward the road.
“I’m sorry. I know you would rather be with Trevor but I just had to get her away from me for a bit. She’s smothering me. I’ve had a damn concussion before and I’m fucking fine. I just needed a breather.” Matt’s weary eyes locked with Allison’s. “And I wanted to thank you. You really saved my ass back there.”
“You saved mine first! I heard how they threatened you to give me up but you didn’t. You were a total badass,” Allison said. Matt laughed.
“Badass, huh?” Does this look like the face of a badass? But I’ll take the compliment.” He pulled a fla
sk from his bag and took a swig before offering it to Allison. She happily accepted and sat next to him, then tipped the flask to her lips. “Look,” he said, “I originally came with you for Morgan. I couldn’t let her go alone. She hasn’t been a clear thinker since we lost our family and it’s my job to protect her. But now that you rescued my ass you are definitely stuck with me. Friends for life!” He grinned as he took the flask and tipped it back.
“I can handle that.” Allison playfully snagged the flask from Matt before finishing it off in one gulp.
The next morning Allison awoke before her friends and opened her journal, scanning the words by the slight light of early morning. She had been dreading this moment but knew she needed to get the information down before she forgot the details. She had to get the memory onto the page and out of her mind so she could focus on the task ahead. The flashback played again and again, driving her insane. She went to the last page, writing frantically, filling it with everything she could remember from her flashback about Gabby.
* * *
The Cabin
My whole body tight, convulsing like a seizure. My head slamming into the floor over and over.
The scent of blood . . . food. I’m so hungry, so fucking hungry.
Blonde hair. A woman talking gently. The more she talks the more upset I am. I hate her. I don’t know why but I hate her.
Gabby. Gabby is the woman.
I lunge for her and she screams, she begs. I want to stop but I can’t. I’m so hungry and so angry.
Blood. Lots of blood. Screams.
She reread her entry over and over again hoping the story would change but it didn’t. Each time she read it, it was like a dagger to her heart.
The friends continued on their trek through the woods. They moved slowly to allow Matt to keep up. The terrain was relatively easy to navigate with the exception of the occasional large log or thick brush to traverse through. They did not speak much as they walked, allowing their minds to process the trauma they endured the night before. Morgan would sporadically cry softly and either Matt or Allison would put their arm around her shoulders providing silent comfort. Trevor kept his attention focused on their surroundings as he led the group, periodically checking with Allison to confirm they were headed in the right direction. Each time they stopped to rest Allison would review her journal and add detail to a map she was drawing on the last page. This helped her feel like she knew where she was leading all of her friends, but in reality she was going off of a deep internal instinct that told her she was heading in the right direction. It was like her body was intimately familiar with her surroundings although her head was not.
Once the sun was right above their heads they decided to stop for an extended break. They found a gently flowing stream, perfect for restocking their water supply and cleaning some of their dirty clothes.
“Hey guys, this water is freezing!” Morgan held her canteen in the water, bubbles rising to the surface as it filled the canteen. She grinned at her friends as she took a long drink. Matt walked over to the water and stuck his hand in.
“Wow, this is like ice. It must be coming from an underground spring.” He set his bag down and dug through it until he pulled out a thin towel.
“I think getting into this water would really help my muscles. It’s like the ice baths NFL stars take after practice. It reduces inflammation or some shit like that.” Matt began stripping down his clothes as he spoke. Allison quickly turned her body so she wasn’t facing Matt as her face burned from embarrassment.
“Matt! No one here wants to see that!” Morgan shouted.
“I’m just going to walk this way a bit, to give you some privacy,” Allison said. Before anyone could object, she was pushing her way through a wall of thick bushes, just trying to get away from a naked Matt as quickly as she could. She hadn’t seen a man naked in so long, and she did not want the next one to be Matt. She could hear her friends talking as she pushed through the bushes, which suddenly opened up to a small clearing full of sunshine. Allison pulled a blanket from her pack and laid on it, allowing her mind to wander. A rustling of leaves sounded behind her. She jumped up, facing the potential threat. Her pulse raced as a small bead of sweat formed on her brow dampening her hairline. Through the thicket came Trevor.
“Whoa! It’s just me,” Trevor said as he held his hands in the air. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”
“Dammit, you scared me!” Allison sat on her blanket criss-cross applesauce and motioned for Trevor to sit next to her.
“Well it seems a few people have been trying to kidnap you lately, so I think you being on edge is more than justified.” He sat next to her and handed her a small blue water bottle. “Since the water here is so cold I figured this was a good time to make you a treat.”
“What is it?” She smiled, hoping her cheeks weren’t giving away how truly happy she was that Trevor thought to give her anything.
“Drink it and find out.” He sat with his legs bent and his feet flat on the ground. His arms casually rested on his knees. His perfectly defined jawline was covered with stubble which, combined with the combat-fatigue pants, plain brown shirt, and mud-covered boots gave him a rugged appearance. It looked great on him. Allison’s pulse quickened and her cheeks grew warm. She quickly turned her head away as she took a swig from the blue water bottle.
“Oh my, it’s chocolate milk! How did you get this?” Allison spun her head back to face Trevor with a smile spread from ear to ear.
“I had a little chocolate protein powder from when we left New Harbor. When we were back in that other town I found some powdered milk before that woman and her two thugs found us. I knew you would like it.” He grinned as Allison took a long gulp.
“Thank you. You should have saved this for yourself, though.” Allison tried to hand Trevor the rest of the milk but he shook his head.
“No. I made it for you. I want you to have it.” He put his hand on hers as he pushed the bottle back toward her and Allison felt a thousand butterflies in her stomach.
“Why are you so good to me?” Allison asked.
“You are strong, smart, and can kick my ass. What’s not to love?” Trevor grinned.
“Love?” Allison placed her hand on his cheek, feeling it warm with a blush that spread from cheek to cheek. A lump formed in her throat, and her heart pounded in her chest. Trevor rested his forehead against hers and they locked eyes. The chocolate milk fell to the ground as Allison grasped Trevor’s head between both her hands and pressed her lips to his. His arms wrapped around her torso, pulling her into him as he kissed her back.
Allison felt lighter with a smile pasted across her face as the four of them stayed on the path, maintaining a slow but steady pace while remaining mute, their eyes constantly checking their surroundings. As the sun faded behind the thick trees, a clearing appeared and a weight dropped into Allison’s stomach. The hair on the back of Allison’s neck stood on end as nausea washed over her. I know this place. She quickened her stride until she came to the center of the clearing. She turned slowly in a circle, scanning everything. Her friends hurried to keep up with her.
“What’s wrong, Allison?” Morgan placed her hand on Allison’s shoulder.
“I know this place,” Allison said, a tremble in her voice as she spotted what she had been looking for. Near the edge of the clearing, high in a tree, was a wooden deer stand. “This is where I was turned. It happened right over there.” She pointed in the direction of the platform.
“Are you sure?” Trevor asked.
“Yes, I’m positive.” Before she knew it she was running toward the stand.
Trevor was right on her heels. Morgan and Matt were behind them, moving as quickly as Matt was able. She slowed as she got closer to the base of the tree, abruptly stopping when her feet kicked something hidden in layers of Mother Nature’s shedding of the seasons. She looked down; seeing something white was peeking out from all that brown earth. She kicked it again until the thing became fully vis
ible. It was a bone. She stumbled back quickly, tripping over her own feet and falling backward. Trevor caught her from behind by her arms before she hit the ground.
“Jesus, Allison! Be careful!” Trevor helped steady her. “What’s going on?”
Matt and Morgan reached them now. Matt looked down at the bone, his forehead furrowed as he crossed his arms in front of his chest.
“My anatomy isn’t the fucking best, but that’s not an animal bone.” Matt reached for the bone but Allison swiftly kicked it out of his reach.
“You’re right it’s not a fucking animal bone, it’s the fucking bone of the Infected that turned me.” Tears wet Allison’s face as she spoke. “I need a minute.” She moved away from her friends, putting her back against a tree, hiding herself from view as she cried.
She was crying for the Infected woman whose bones have been laying in the forest for years. She cried for every person she hurt and killed. She cried because this beautiful spot would forever be marred by the events that took place that September night three years ago.
Morgan stood next to Allison. She opened her mouth to speak but closed it without uttering a word.
Allison wiped tears from her eyes while looking at her friend.
“That was intense back there,” Morgan said. “I can’t even pretend I know what you are going through.” Allison nodded.
Morgan said, “You are handling it better than I would.”
“This is where my life changed. It’s not only where I was turned. This is where I killed someone for the first time.” Allison sniffled as tears burned her eyes again.