When a Man Falls in Love (The Depression Series Book 1)

by Amelia Lee

  I saw a woman, she was seemed same age with me, was talking with one of the nurse. She saw me and came over. She also sat down beside me and smiled at me. "Are you Emmerich Fischer?"

  I nodded, "Yes. Sorry, do I know you?"

  She held my hand, "I'm Iris. Nice to meet you. What a coincidence, one of my friend is the nurse who nursed you, the one who tell the doctor that you have awake." I smiled at her. I did not know what to answer. She asked me, "If I may ask, does your family know that you are here now?"

  I sighed, "I do not know. They should have been here since first I was treated, but none of them or someone come claiming to be my family," I said and showed a sad smile.

  "You do not remember any of them?"

  "I've tried, but I could not remember it until now. Looks like my brain is completely broken,"

  She stroked my shoulder as she calmed me down, "You certainly can remember back someday,"

  "I want to get out of here as quickly as possible. I do not want to stay too long in the hospital, I do not know how to pay for all of this,"

  "Do you remember a friend or acquaintances other than family?"

  "I can not remember anything,"

  "Remembering things will be more difficult when you're diagnosed with amnesia," she said, smiling.

  "Yes. And what are you doing here, if I may ask?"

  "Sometimes I help my father, but often just to see how and what exactly he does a doctor." She continued her words, "It looks like it's already late, I have to go back. Good night,"

  I smiled at her, "Good night."

  I asked to James to go home as soon as possible, although I did not know where to go. James granted my wish, although he was not so sure will let patients with retrograde amnesia wandering outside the hospital without having to remember a single thing about himself. He told me to try to explore my own memory, but not be too often forced or instead will harm the brain itself while he prepared for my weekly therapy. I saw Iris was sitting on a park bench just before I left the hospital and wander off somewhere. She was reading a book alone. I greeted her and smiled at her, "May I sit here?"

  She smiled and nodded, "Of course." She closed the book and asked me, "Are there you want to talk to me?"

  It was the perfect time to throw away the taste of my pride. I need help from someone else now, and I was not going to get anything, at any time if I did not ask for her help. "Yes. I need a job, because I do not know and do not remember at all what I was doing before and what my previous job,"

  "I'm sorry, but I can not give you a job,"

  I gave her a sad smile. I was feeling sorry for myself, "I know. And it seems this may sound ridiculous. I do not even know where to stay or rent an apartment." She paused before saying something, "Maybe I can help you? My friend’s father, he owned a flower shop that is now in need of an employee. You can try to start working on there,"

  "Is it true?" She nodded, "Yes. I'll show you tomorrow,"

  "I'm so grateful to you,"

  "Look and ask for help, people will help you,"

  "You're a good woman, Iris," She smiled at me.

  Three months later

  It was one month since I worked at the florist's. And I know Iris, well, her, has been a month since our meeting at the hospital at that time. She was a good and sweet woman. She was my savior. I probably will not be able to work there or be able to rent a room in a cheap flat if I did not met her. I will definitely be chased by the police for running away from the hospital without having to pay the hospital’s bill. I will definitely be a homeless person.

  The room I rent was not too big, I can not afford to rent a large, besides, I live alone and did not require a room that is too large. It was located not in a very strategic location. Indeed access from the flat towards the city center was not too far away, there was a bus that would take me. But the problem was, the buses are sometimes arrive late and are only available every one hour.

  It was located not in a very strategic location especially for families who chose to stay here and have a child or children. I did not see any schools or educational centers here. At night, the area around my flat was going to be cheesy, lots of prostitutes, drunk peoples everywhere and homeless people in the vicinity. And fortunately, I was never disturbed or bothered by their presence. Sometimes I even have pity on them.

  Many things have happened over the last three months. First, I never thought I'd be like this before. I suffered from retrograde amnesia and I was not able to remember my family. It looks like James’ words becomes a reality, I nearly lost my memory.

  Secondly, I did not believe my unintended encounter with Iris will take me this far. Because of her I have a job, though only just work at the florist that did not sell many flowers or got crowded visitors, at least I did not have to beg for money.

  Third, when the night’s come and I fall asleep, I always hoped that I could get up and go back in time where before I had the accident. I miss my family, which if they may still remain there, somewhere. I almost had a nightmare every day, I would wake up with my shirt wet with sweat. And it all makes my head getting sick even worse when I think about it. And I did not tell it to anyone, especially my nightmares.

  Fourth, Iris was the first person who get close to me. She was like a friend and helper at the same time. She offered me a job, care for my brain that did not show its progress, and wants to make friends with me. Kindness made her perfect as a woman in my eyes. Anyone who would later become her soul mate, I pray that God will send the right man for her.

  Fifth, the most surprising thing was the fact that Iris was the only daughter of James, the doctor who was taking care of me. I had not realized before that the father he was referring to was James.

  And it seems James did not like seeing my closeness to Iris.

  April 14, 2006. Night.

  Today I was invited Iris to go along. Initially I was invited to go to an Italian restaurant, but she refused. She prefers to go to the cinema to watch. We planned to watch horror movies that day. It was Friday, the queue line looks long enough. We lined up for about ten minutes until finally able to get our desired ticket. We bought popcorn and spent about one hour in the cinema.

  We walked toward an open park to sit and chat there after finished watching the movie. I feel the cool breeze swept my skin and beautiful night decorated with some stars in the sky became the scene of my own eyes. I saw Iris walking beside. Her blue eyes gazed towards the front, but turned to me shortly after she realized that I was watching her. "Something wrong?" She said, smiling.

  "No," I replied.

  We sat on a park bench which painted with white paint under the shade of large trees. I felt the sky seems so clear that day. I pointed to the sky, toward a bluish star that were so bright, "Do you see a slightly bluish colored star over there?"

  "Yes. So beautiful,"

  "People said the blue star is a hot star,"

  "Is it true?"

  "I do not know, I'm not an astronomer," I said, smiled at her.

  She paused before speaking again, "Emmerich, why do you want me to go with you today?"

  "Is it bother you?"

  She smiled, "No, not at all,"

  "I think you are my best friend. You help me, if I do not meet you at that time, I did not know what would it be right now,"

  "It’s my duty to help people who are in distress," she smiled.

  “May I ask something?”

  “Yes, of course. You act like I am a new person to you,” she smiled.

  ”Are you close with another man? I… I mean more than just friendship with another… man?"

  "Nope." My heart was racing faster than usual. I sighed before I said something I never imagined before, "Will you be my lover?"

  I felt the heat through my body just after I said it. The words just came out, and can not be withdrawn. It was my fate. She did not say anything so I decided to go back to speak, "I know I should not talk about this. I'm sorry if I've said it."

  It was e
ight o'clock in the evening when I intercept a taxi to take us home. On the way home, we did not speak much. The situation became cold, icy after I declared my love for Iris. The taxi drivers continue to pay attention to us through the windshield. It turns out because I have not told him my address. I felt just like a fool. Iris cut my words, when I was telling her address to the taxi driver. She told the taxi driver the address of my flat, not her address. "I like to go there, after all, I've never been there, is not it?" she said, smiling.

  After arriving to my flat, the atmosphere was still a bit chilly. I did not think she would come here. It was nearly nine o'clock when she visited my flat for the first time. I offered her a drink, "You want something to drink?"

  She shook her head, "No thanks."

  We were silent for about five minutes with no one's talking. I opened my voice and talked with her. Honestly I was a little nervous at that time and I did not know why, "How about your father? He must be worried now,"

  "No. Moreover, this is Saturday night, he usually thinks I'm going to stay with my friends." She continued her words as she walked toward the glass window of my room. The small window was a silent witness when I have nightmares, I always looked at it and see the moon and stars hanging in the night sky. Hoping that someone out there, whoever it was, will come over and help. I feel lonely.

  "You can see a view like this every night?" she asked.

  "Yes. That's why I chose the room with the window facing the sky, not toward precarious or other buildings. Staring at the night sky can make me feel better."

  She stepped and sat next to me. She watched and touched my face and brushed my cheek with her hand, "Are you feeling lonely?" I nodded. She put her lips gently with my lips. I closed my eyes as I felt the touch of her lips, smooth touch surface mine. She kissed me gently. "I may not be able to remove the sense of loneliness that is embedded in your heart, but I will always be there for you when you're feeling lonely until you do not feel alone at all," she said.

  "I think I do not deserve to be at your side, in your arms, you…" she cut me off and kissed me on the lips.

  "Sshh. Let everything flow. You're here now. You will always run forward, not backward," she said. I took her to my bed and lay her down there. I stroked her face, as well as a few strands of hair from her face. Moonlight becomes the only light that illuminate the room's entrance. I kissed her eyes, her nose, her neck until she squeezed my hair.

  "I love you."

  She smiled at me, "Let me be all yours."

  Two weeks later

  Today Iris invited me to eat with her family. Her father, actually. I was nervous, what should I say to her father? A young man who recently had an accident and suffered with retrograde amnesia? I pressed the bell which was located right next to the wooden door. Iris came and open it for me. She showed a cheery smile when she saw me.

  "Have you waited too long?" I asked.

  "No. You even come five minutes early."

  James was there, sitting while pouring tea into porcelain cups. Iris invited me to sit down. She went to the kitchen and get something to eat. James glimpse and asked me, "How are you?"

  I smiled, "Good. Much better now."

  Iris back and bring us a roasted turkey. I eat the dishes that are served in front of me with a clumsy feeling. Not because I was ashamed, but because I felt uncomfortable with James. It really seems he does not like me. He looks apathy, we did not talk much. He was cold as ice in my glass.

  "So what brings you here?" He asked me.

  "Iris invited me here," I said with a smile.

  "I thought you already knew, that she is my daughter. My only daughter,"

  "Yes, I already knew,"

  Iris tried to break the ice, "How’s the chicken? Is it good?"

  I smiled and nodded. James asked me back, "How long have you guys known each other?"

  "Three months,"

  "Oh, quite a long time." James asked me again, "Have you remember your past? I mean your family that may still be there?"

  "Dad, please, do not talk about it here," said Iris.

  James stood up and said again before he left us, "I’m sorry Mr. Fischer, but I can not possibly let my daughter relates to you any further. I'm sure you'll have a better life." He went to his room.

  Iris stood up and joined him, "Wait a minute. Dad." I faintly heard them arguing behind James’ bedroom door. "What if he is not a good man? He does not even recognize himself!"

  "No, dad, it's not what you think! He is a good man, if he wanted to hurt me, he'll do it all the time!"

  "I do not want to know, I still do not agree if you still with him!"

  I went back to my cheesy flat with limp step. It was so sad, very painful. I've never felt rejected by someone like this before. I sincerely love her. I did not blame anyone or situation myself, if I became James maybe I would have done the same.

  The only thing that was able to do is to improve my lives and the degree of myself, explore any memory that may remain in my mind and try to forget about Iris. If I can.

  Although I know I may not be able to. She was my helper. I was really sincere about my feeling.

  Stephanie

  October 1, 2004

  I walked with lazy steps and anger that filled me. Why he did not believe my words? I was really fed up. My school just as suck as my house. I was summoned by my headmaster that morning, with my parents and two of my other friends. I admit it was my fault, I should not do it. I was not supposed to do this to Dorris, my mathematic teacher. He seems does not like me since the first time he saw me and I did not know why, and I always refused everything he taught to us in class.

  I did not say that I ever liked everything about mathematics before, I also recognize this ‘mathematic thing’ was enough to make me giddy like my head going to burst.

  He was teaching us at that time when I found an easier way to solve the question he wrote on the board. I told my friend about that that I solved his question with shorter and way easier way, not as complicated as he taught us. He did not heed me, he even biting my head off because it spends little time to argue about unimportant things. I know he was the teacher but he should also apply the principle of realistic in him. Teacher does not always right, is not it? I did not like him from the beginning he was signed to replace the previous retired teacher. I did not like the way he taught me, I did not like his face, I just did not like all about him the way he did not like me at all.

  That was not the only reason why I did not like him. It was on Tuesday morning, I came earliest and school was deserted. It was a foggy day, the rain just fall. I saw him in the toilet with one of my classmate. They were making out, sigh out of their mouths.

  The next day I told my other friends and we planned to give him ‘a little surprise’ that day. I threw a rotten egg and put dead rat carcasses which found in trash cans into his bag and books. He looked very angry. He reported us to the headmaster and firmly believed that I did it. I did not want to lose from him, I said that I had seen her with a female student in the restroom Tuesday. All people did not believe me, I did not even believe what I just said. But I promise I will prove that my words are correct sooner or later. The headmaster gave me a letter, warning me not to do that again.

  Next day

  Time showed at six in the evening when I noticed Sebastian was sitting in my living room. He must have been waiting for since earlier. He asked me to go somewhere that day. He smiled when he saw me, "Are you ready?" I replied his smile and nodded, "Yes."

  He did not ask me to go to a place full of expensive items. He did not ask me to go to a place where I can buy anything I want. He did not ask me to go watching movies. He did not ask me to go to a restaurant. He just asked me to go to see the stars at night, just like I always wanted. He bought me a pair of binoculars so I could see it anytime I want. And it was more than enough for me.

  We went to a small hill with the tall slender trees lined beside. He told me that if I want to see the stars clearly, t
hen I have to go to a place away from pollution because pollution ‘closes’ the beautiful scenery I should be able to enjoy without having to go all the way to a free of pollution place. That is why the city residents with high pollution and smog levels will not be able to see the beauty of the stars at night. Stars that I mean here is a collection of stars and galaxies in which we live. The Milky Way Galaxy.

  I walked while occasionally looking into the night sky. It was very beautiful. And with Sebastian presence here adds to its beauty. He was like the stars that shone only for me in the dark. He offered me a bottle of water to drink, "Do you want to drink?" I took it and drank it.

  I asked him, "How do you know such a beautiful place like this?"

  "Do you like it?" he asked. I nodded. He continued his words, "I know it from my father. He said to me, this place is so beautiful at night." I responded with a smile. He then cupped my cheek with his hand and kissed me on the lips while occasionally suck it. He whispered into my ear, "You are so beautiful tonight."

  I smiled and asked him, "Do you believe what I just said about Dorris? I saw, indeed, Tuesday. I'm not making it up really,"

  "Of course. I heard it from your friend. This story has spread and everyone assumes that you're just making it up,"

  "Is it true?"

  "Yes, after all, what did he do? I mean, what are they doing?"

  "They making out in the toilet, in that morning. It was disgusting but I wanted to laugh when I saw it." He got up and carried me to a land planted with green grass not far from here. He laid me down and kissed my face. He said while tickle my stomach, "Like this? Did they do like this?"

  I giggled, "No. Not like this. Stop, someone will see us,"

  He smiled at me and kissed me on the lips few times.

  6 days later

  I walked with lightning-quick step toward the headmaster's office. I was planning to fulfill the promise I made to myself. The promise to show everyone that Dorris did have a special relationship with one of the students in my school. Yesterday, precisely on Wednesday, I went back to see Dorris and that girl running simultaneously penetrating chill of the afternoon breeze. They did not see me, I was on the bus on the way home. They held hands and embraced each other waist. I was not able to see the face of his mysterious lover. Her face was covered with a jacket he was wearing. I took a picture of this good moment with my cell phone camera. I know I should not disturb other people's lives, but I was not sorry that I did it and it just seem not fair. At least for me. What if she uses him to ‘raise’ her grades at school? I mean make her grade all A+? That's what I call injustice.