by Skye Horn
“What have you been doing here?” Haven finally asked as Thea’s breathing settled. She pulled away and wiped her eyes of the tears, trying to regain her strength. There were too many important matters to discuss, and no matter how much she wanted to just cry with her friend about those they had lost, there was work to be done. “And who are you?”
Haven eyed Caden with suspicion just as Adrian moved in front of his prince for protection.
“This is Prince Caden, son of King Rayan,” Thea explained, shooting a pointed look at Adrian that she hoped conveyed her message of calm down well enough. “He is my cousin.”
“Cousin?” Haven lifted an eyebrow, looking between Thea and Caden as if to try and find the family resemblance.
“Pleasure to meet you,” Caden said cheerfully, waving from behind Adrian, who looked as serious as ever.
“And you?” Haven asked, eyeing Adrian with a smirk. “We didn’t have time for proper introductions earlier.”
Adrian’s fingers twitched at his sword and Thea rolled her eyes, stepping between them. “This is Adrian. He likes to call himself my babysitter.”
Haven burst into a loud fit of laughter that filled heart-breaking Thea with thoughts of home. She’d missed Haven more than she could describe, more than she’d even realized.
“And she likes to tell me she doesn’t need one,” Adrian added, but Thea could tell he was trying to hide a smile. She grinned at him in response, even though she knew her eyes were still rimmed red from crying. Something had changed between the two of them in the past couple of days, and although it was a rollercoaster ride that she didn’t understand, she liked it when he was kind like this.
“I would hope so,” Haven said, recovering from her laughter. “Oh, I almost forgot!”
She tugged the bow and quiver off her back and handed them to Thea with a smile. “I knew you didn’t like my gift as much as the others, but I thought maybe you’d want it.”
Thea couldn’t help the smile that spread across her lips as she took the bow from Haven. However, as Haven began to unsheathe the sword at her hip, Adrian moved forward.
“Relax,” Haven said, holding up her hands in surrender. “I just want to give her what belongs to her.”
Thea stared at the sword, inhaling sharply as Haven held it out to her. She recognized the intricate detailing of the handle, as well as the thin line of script across the blade.
In darkness and in light, I will always protect you.
She traced her fingers over the engraving and closed her eyes, remembering her last conversation with Kieran. It hurt. It hurt more than anything she’d ever felt before, but she welcomed the hurt with open arms because if she fought it off anymore, she’d never survive this war.
“I thought you’d want it,” Haven said quietly, looking nervous as Thea reopened her eyes. She took the sword in her hands, feeling its familiar weight against her palm, and nodded.
“Thank you,” she said sincerely.
“I have this too.” Haven pulled out a small leather pouch, which Thea knew held the gemstone Declan had given her.
“How is he?”
“I mean, you basically left him at the altar… so…“ A mischievous grin played across Haven’s face as both Adrian and Caden exclaimed “WHAT?”
Thea shook her head with a small smile. “You’re cruel, you know that?”
“Hey, I wasn’t the runaway bride.” Haven shrugged in response with a wicked grin that filled Thea with warmth once more.
“I thought—”
“You were—”
“I was engaged to be married to Lord Declan of Gimmerwich, but it was all a ruse.” Thea waved her hand to dismiss the confused looks of the boys. No matter how amusing those looks were, she didn’t feel like discussing that day with them. “All you need to know is that I didn’t leave him at the altar.”
She laughed a little as Haven watched her with amusement.
“Do you have any more suitors I should know about before my friend here gets his poor heart broken?” Caden asked with a smirk.
Adrian turned on him with a deadly glare that made Thea giggle, but now it was Haven’s turn to cast a curious glance at Thea.
“I do not appreciate your insinuation, friend,” Adrian growled, but Caden didn’t look apologetic at all. Instead, he hooked his arm around Adrian’s shoulder and laughed.
“Whatever you say. I’m just looking out for you.”
Thea turned back to Haven and reached for her hand as she tucked the little leather pouch into her pocket. “Please tell me you brought my armor too.”
“I did one better, actually.” Haven’s grin was almost enough to make Thea squeal. She peaked around Haven, trying to see where her friend was hiding whatever she’d brought. The other girl laughed, shaking her head. “Goddesses fighting over your power, but you’re still the same old Thea about clothes. I will say I’m surprised to see you in a dress, even one without a corset.”
“I’m a woman of many talents,” Thea said.
Adrian stifled a laugh behind her, but she didn’t bother looking at him. Instead she reached out and pulled Haven back into a hug. “I missed you so much.”
“I know you told me go keep them safe, and I promise you I’ve done everything in my power to protect them, but we couldn’t leave you here by yourself after everything you’ve been through.” Haven pulled back and brushed Thea’s hair away from her face with a small, sad smile that Thea understood completely. Haven hadn’t known Ethel as long as Thea had, and Thea hadn’t known Ethel as long as Iris had, but they all felt her loss.
“I’m going to convince Morrigan to let you stay,” Thea said finally, looking toward Adrian. “And you’re going to help me.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Thea—” Adrian started to say but Thea narrowed her eyes at him.
“I don’t really care what you think. If you want that position, you need me to succeed. I can’t do that without Haven.”
It was a stretch of the truth, but now that Haven was here, Thea couldn’t imagine sending her away.
“What exactly do you need to succeed at?” Haven asked, lifting an eyebrow, but Adrian and Thea were locked in a staredown as Caden finally stepped in.
“How about I talk to my father?”
“No!“ Adrian’s annoyance turned to anger more quickly than Thea could register and she nearly stepped back into Haven at the intensity behind his gaze.
“Adrian, I’ll be fine—”
“I said no,” Adrian growled low toward his friend, and Thea saw then the fear behind his eyes. She immediately came to his aid, realizing that whatever reason Adrian had for keeping Caden away from his father was a good one.
“I agree with Adrian,” Thea said quietly. “King Rayan wouldn’t say yes anyway. We need Morrigan to say yes.”
The caw of a crow in the sky above them drew all of their attention toward the sky.
Thea cursed, watching as the raven perched itself on a nearby tree, staring them down with a far-too-intelligent gaze.
“Shit—” Adrian started to say but it was too late. Thea knew that Morrigan knew exactly where they were and who they were with. She felt like an idiot for not realizing that the Goddess would be watching her after their last training session.
The raven let out another loud caw and flew back into the air right past Thea’s head. She nearly swatted at it, feeling its feathers brush against her cheek with a wave of power as it glided right along the wall of the castle and over the top, disappearing from sight.
“I’m going to say she knows I’m here,” Haven said. While they’d been distracted, she’d grabbed a bag, likely from the surrounding forest, and she was now lugging it onto her shoulder. It looked heavy, and Thea ached to open it, knowing what was inside, but there was no doubt the Goddess waited for them now.
Adrian had gone pale as a ghost, but Thea walked to him and took his hand gently in hers. He looked at her with surprise, flinching slightly at her touch, but she
didn’t pull her hand away as she said, “I’ll take the blame. I’ll say that Haven contacted me and I snuck out of the castle. You and Caden came after me.”
Haven eyed her as she spoke, studying her contact with Adrian a little too intently, but Thea tried not to think too much about it. Caden had said this position was important to Adrian because he was trying to protect his family. She wouldn’t let him lose that because of this. It was her turn to do something for him.
The tension in Adrian’s shoulders didn’t appear to loosen as he contemplated his options. Thea had come to the conclusion since arriving in Blackmire that he wasn’t the type of person to accept help often, but now she was going to force him to. He didn’t need to lose his chance to help his family because of her. Enough people had suffered because of her.
“We’d better go,” Haven said, seeming to sense the tension between the two as she stepped up to stand beside Thea. “Lead the way.”
She directed this at Adrian, but Caden took the lead, grabbing Adrian by the arm and pulling him away from the two girls and back into the castle.
“Come on,” Haven said gently to Thea and tugged her toward the stone doorway. She happily followed, but nerves filled her as they entered the castle once more.
When they reached the library Morrigan was already waiting for them, and she looked more angry than Adrian had ever seen her before. One by one, they slunk into the room like children about to be scolded, but Adrian kept his face stoic and chin held high beneath her darkening stare. As Thea and Haven finally walked through the heavy tapestry, it fell back into place, concealing the passageway once more.
“I give you a day to rest and this is how I find you?” she asked, glaring at Thea, who, to Adrian’s surprise, did not even back down from the intensity of the stare. Instead, she gripped the sword at her hip. He hadn’t gotten a close look at everything Thea had been given, but she definitely looked different now with her weapons strapped around her—more like a queen.
“My queen—” Caden started to say, but she raised her hand to silence him, then turned her venomous look onto Adrian.
“And you! You allowed this? When you have so much on the line?”
The words sank in slowly, bringing a deep dread to Adrian as his head finally dropped. If Thea didn’t get him out of this, he’d likely never get the position he’d been promised by the king.
“It was my decision,” Thea said, stepping forward. “Adrian and Caden came after me after I snuck out.”
“He is your guard,” Morrigan said, tone dropping an octave. Thea was walking a dangerous line.
“And I am a queen. You expect one guard to keep me locked up?” The tone in Thea’s voice was challenging enough to surprise even Adrian. Haven looked ready to jump in front of Thea if it became necessary, but before anyone else could say a word or move, Thea stepped toward Morrigan, squaring her shoulders right in front of the Goddess of Death.
Adrian found himself holding his breath. He wanted to stop her. He needed to stop her. And yet, he remained frozen in place with the image of his little sister at the back of his mind.
“I should be insulted that you think one guard could keep me locked up,” Thea continued. “How am I supposed to defeat your sister if I can’t even get past one Fae?”
At this, she tilted her head at the Goddess, but Adrian saw her fingers were trembling. She was just as nervous standing up to the Goddess as he felt.
“I should have done better—” Adrian finally got out, but this time it was he who the Goddess silenced.
“You’re growing braver, or perhaps more reckless,” Morrigan said finally, looking thoughtful.
“I have more reasons to be brave now,” Thea responded, but didn’t back down.
For a long moment, the two just stood and stared at each other. Despite seeing Thea’s power in glimpses, Adrian now saw the queen she could be if given the chance. She held her ground for what she believed in. Even though he didn’t know everything she’d been through, he saw the potential in her. It also brought back the guilt he’d been running from… a guilt that would slowly suffocate him if he didn’t figure out a way to tell Thea the truth, and soon. He couldn’t let Morrigan do this to her, but he also couldn’t let his sister suffer because of him.
“I assume you wish for her to stay.” Morrigan looked toward Haven, who had remained silent. “If she stays, she is not to interfere with your training. I want her hidden from the king. He’s already frustrating enough without giving him something else to complain about.”
Physical relief spread across Thea’s face as the Goddess stepped away, and Adrian let out the breath he’d been holding. They’d avoided at least one catastrophe for the day.
“Brief me on what has happened in Grimwalde,” Morrigan said to Haven, who immediately stepped forward. She looked at Thea for confirmation first, showing whom she trusted and whom she didn’t, but as soon as Thea nodded she launched into a tale of what had happened up until this point.
“Kieran commands the army, but remains by her side,” Haven explained. “Many of the villagers stayed, but many also fled. They are loyal to their queen.”
Her eyes drifted to Thea, who had paled at Kieran’s name, and Adrian quickly averted his eyes, not wishing to intrude on that moment of grief. Whatever Kieran had meant to her, she had no idea how big a part he played in things now. How could he tell her that she carried—he presumed—his child? How could he convince her that Morrigan couldn’t know she knew…because it would mean the end of his sister’s chance of survival?
Everything about the situation he was in ripped him apart inside, and suddenly, he hated himself for caring about Thea again. He wanted to shake the care away like vermin, but it was too late. He’d crossed a line and again he would suffer for it.
Caden was watching him closely, but when their eyes met, Adrian saw the concern. He couldn’t tell anyone, not even Caden, because if he did, that would be the end of his journey in this castle. Who would protect Caden with him gone? And who would pay for his sister’s treatments?
“Adrian?” Thea whispered, coming to stand next to him. Haven and Morrigan were speaking across the room now. He didn’t know when they’d moved away, but somehow he was now somewhat alone with Thea, and all he wanted to do was run in the other direction.
“Sorry, what?” he said, realizing he’d missed something she’d said. The concern only grew deeper on Caden’s face.
“I said, can I talk to you?”
Seeming to get the hint, Caden took a step away.
“I have a meeting to attend,” Caden lied. Adrian knew his schedule and that there was no meeting, but his friend didn’t see the panic he felt at being alone with Thea. Instead, he thought he was doing him a favor. Adrian groaned internally as Caden disappeared, but Thea was still waiting for his response.
“What’s up?” he asked, trying to sound casual, but his voice cracked.
“I wanted to say thank you.”
Please don’t, he thought miserably.
“I know being here hasn’t been easy. I couldn’t keep this from you.”
Even though I’m keeping other things from you.
“Well, I know you are risking a lot for me…”
The way Thea said “risking” made Adrian’s breath catch. She had a knowing look on her face, but what exactly did she know? Before he could ask she continued quickly, “I just mean that I want us to both get what we want. So thank you.”
Even though Adrian thought she’d meant something else, he let it go. He couldn’t handle this time with her, not right now and especially not with the guilt she was making him feel.
“I know things have been kind of rough between us, but I’m glad to have a friend in the castle.”
The waves of guilt crashed down around Adrian in icy shards. He wished he could run after Caden and never see Thea again, but still, she stared at him with those large gray eyes… gray eyes that maybe her baby shared.
His world was tearing apart and
his words came out rushed. “We aren’t friends, Thea. I just need you at your best, and your friend seemed like the way to get that out of you.”
Hurt flashed across her features before they hardened. He would have sworn her lip quivered, but whatever hurt he’d caused, she forced it away and it only made him feel worse. He wanted to take the words back immediately, but her face said she wouldn’t hear another word he said.
Still he tried, opening his mouth to speak, but she shook her head, silencing him.
“Understood, Adrian,” she said coldly. “You smell like ale. I think Morrigan can escort us back to my room just fine. You should go.”
Without waiting for a response, Thea turned and walked toward Haven and Morrigan, but not before Adrian saw the anger flash behind her eyes.
Part of him wished to go after her, but another said this was yet again for the best.
He didn’t know how he’d gotten himself into such a mess, but caring about Thea was only going to make things worse, so the only solution was to stop caring.
Or at least to pretend to stop caring.
He left the room feeling more miserable than he’d ever felt in his entire life.
Chapter 14
The days passed in a blur, and Thea rarely saw Adrian outside of their morning training. After their stunt with Haven, Morrigan had insisted that Thea’s training resume immediately because apparently she didn’t need more rest if she could sneak out of the castle and open stone doors. Thea didn’t argue. She wanted to get back to training as soon as possible anyway. However, Haven wasn’t allowed at the training sessions with Thea, because Adrian said he didn’t want her to be distracted. But other than the order for Haven to remain behind, Adrian rarely spoke to Thea during training except to correct her.
It was growing infuriating.
She’d thought they’d crossed a threshold together, and yet, it seemed they were back to square one in whatever relationship they’d built. Once in a while, albeit rarely, she found herself missing their occasional banter, but having Haven in the castle helped with that strange feeling. Perhaps she’d just been lonely before Haven’s arrival. She was grieving, after all, and Adrian, annoying as he was, had been there to take the edge off.