“Perfect.” She clapped her hands together and ushered us into another room where equipment hung along the walls and rectangular tables sat in the middle of the room. Three other people were already inside.
“We have five of you going up this morning,” Parker said. “But you're the only tandems. I'll be your instructor, Callie.”
An older man with a long beard and weathered skin walked toward us. “Jamie, this is Hank. He's with you.”
We spent the next two hours watching a video and learning how to position our bodies while hurtling through the air.
“Do I get to pull the chute?” I asked.
“Not this time,” Hank answered.
The last thing we did was learn how to land, and then we were suiting up in warm clothes and jumpsuits.
“Trust me,” Parker said. “It may be Florida, but 14,000 feet is still freaking cold.”
I stepped into my harness, letting Parker tighten it, and pulled on a pair of goggles.
“Load five,” a voice said over the loudspeaker. “This is your get it on call.”
Everyone jumped to action, and they led us across the landing zone to a small plane that looked like it had seen better days. A lump of fear formed in my throat as I thought about what I was going to do.
Callie stopped walking in front of me, her feet frozen in place. She gasped in a breath as the people in front of us got farther and farther away on their way to the plane.
Without thinking, I stepped up beside her, slipping my hand into hers. Our fingers laced together, and I squeezed. There was no one else I'd rather be doing this with, and that sudden realization slammed into me. I bent down, positioning my lips by her ear. “You can do this.” And it was true. This girl could do anything.
She shivered, and I squeezed her hand tighter. Closing her eyes, she inhaled.
“I'll do this, Jamie.” She turned her head, her face inches from mine. “But I need you there with me. One-hundred percent. When we step into that plane, there are no dead moms, no uncertain futures or douchey dads or abandoning mothers.” She paused. “You leave your stuff here, and so will I. We do this together. Parker once told me that up there you can forget, just for a moment. I need to forget, and so do you.”
I dropped her hand as her words sank in, and I realized what she'd said. “Abandoning mothers.” She knew. Everything. How? My chest rose, and I blew out a breath between my teeth. F-ing Jay. A calm settled over me as I looked at her, her eyes wide with fear of what I was thinking. After a long moment of charged silence, I reached out, brushing back a strand that'd fallen loose from her braid. My fingertips trailed along her cheek, and I nodded, taking her hand again.
“Come on,” I said.
We walked up to the plane and climbed in. Two metal benches lined the walls on the inside of the plane. I looked across from me and kept my eyes trained on Callie. We can do this. I gave her a sheepish look as the plane rumbled to life. It seemed to cough and groan as it left the ground behind, making her grip the bench until her knuckles turned white.
The three solo skydivers bailed out at 10,000 feet, and we finished the climb to 14,500. Parker hooked Callie's harness to hers, and the door slid open causing light and wind to rush into the dinghy craft.
“We're up first!” Parker yelled to be heard. “We aren't quite at altitude so when we walk over, stand with your toes on the edge, but don't jump until I say.”
Callie pulled her goggles down and stood before waddling over to the open door.
“Good luck, Cal,” I yelled. She was able to pry one hand free of the door frame long enough to flip me the bird. I grinned as she disappeared from sight.
Hank and I were next. One instant we were sitting on the bench, and the next we were at the open door. Everything in me screamed that this was wrong. My body wanted to revolt. You're not supposed to jump from a plane. What the hell were we doing?
I couldn't see much with the blinding light and adrenaline causing my system to work on overdrive. This was stupid. Gosh, was it stupid. I didn't want to do it anymore. My body wanted to be sitting back on that perfectly good bench.
Just when I didn't think I could take it any longer, Hank spoke. “Ready?”
“No.”
His laugh vibrated through me. “Breathe. Breathe and jump.”
Now or never. I dangled one foot out of the door for just a second before making the plunge. There was no stomach drop, no feeling of falling. Instead, our bodies lifted as I arched my back. The wind rushed in my ears, causing all thought to leave my mind as the ground came into view. The ocean sparkled in the distance, a diamond, uncut and wild.
A peace settled in my chest, and I only wished it would last. This feeling, like nothing bad could happen to me, it was the closest I'd ever get to perfection. I screamed then, as loud as I could, knowing that not even Hank would hear me and not stopping until my throat felt raw.
I closed my eyes for just a second, imagining I was rising instead of plummeting to the earth. I could fly.
It was over too soon. My eyes popped open as I was jerked backwards and up as the parachute snapped open above us.
The deafening noise that had been present since I stepped out of that plane was gone now, replaced by a calming silence as we floated through space.
“Still scared, tough guy?” Hank's rough voice cut the string between reality and fantasy, jerking me out of my peace. “Wasn't that incredible? Gets me every time.”
“Incredible is one word for it.” The adrenaline I hadn't felt on the rapid descent hit me now like a rogue wave, washing over me, trying to pull me under. Excitement warred with fear, until my head finally broke the surface, my body buzzing. I was hanging suspended as we descended the last 6000 feet, but any sense of fear was pushed away.
“Dude, this is sweet,” I said.
“You'll never see the ocean the same way,” Hank agreed.
It shone, large and dark. I'd spent most of my life in those waters, chasing waves, but this was a new perspective.
Gulf City came into view, but it wasn't much to see from above. Pretty ugly actually. It took only ten short minutes to reach the ground with Hank steering our parachute toward the landing zone. I wasn't ready to go down yet. Things were so much simpler up there. They just didn't last.
I pulled my legs up as we got close, just as I'd been taught. The harness tugged and strained on my upper thighs, making it harder. Hank was shorter than me, and I didn't get them up high enough, causing my feet to hit first and sending us tumbling to the grass. He crashed into me, stealing my breath.
“That's one way to land.” Hank laughed as he climbed off me and unhooked our harnesses.
My heart hammered in my chest as I sat there, stunned to be back on the ground. Hank pushed his visor up and offered me a hand with a smile, knowing exactly what I was feeling, what I'd just experienced. Knowing that if this day wasn't the best day of my life, it was at least top five.
I removed my goggles and gripped his hand to climb to my feet.
Turning around, I searched the landing zone.
“Jamie.” Callie came barreling toward me, still high on adrenaline.
I grinned and met her halfway, picking her up around the waist. She threw her arms around my neck, laughing.
“That was the best thing ever,” I yelled, spinning her around.
“It was crazy,” she responded.
“If by crazy you mean just what we needed.” I stopped moving and pulled back to look at her.
“Exactly.” Sliding down my body, her feet hit the ground, jolting her back to herself. She pulled away just as Parker ran over, taking a few pictures and then throwing an arm around each of us.
I glanced toward Callie one more time to see the corners of her lips turn up as she watched me before letting Parker drag us inside to get out of our gear.
15
Callie
“Where have you been all morning?” Colby asked, his mouth full of leftover pizza.
I walked fa
rther into the living room and collapsed onto the couch beside him. “Oh, just jumping out of planes.”
He snorted. “Good one.”
“I guess you're right. It was only one plane.”
He turned toward me, narrowing his eyes. “You're serious?”
I shrugged with a nonchalance I didn't feel.
In true annoying Colby fashion, he didn't press for details. He turned back toward the TV. “Kat was wondering why you weren't around to go to church this morning.” The hint of a smirk showed up on his face. He knew what he was doing to me.
“That's all I get?” I ask. “I fall 14,000 freaking feet and my brother wonders why I didn't go to church?”
His smirk was a full-blown grin now. “Church is important.”
I slugged him, causing him to drop his piece of pizza back onto the plate. “Dude, it was like being in church. I've never felt so close to anything, yet so far away from everything at the same time.”
“That…” He took a bite. “Makes zero sense.”
“You wouldn't understand unless you did it yourself.”
“Did what?” Aunt Kat asked from the doorway.
“Callie decided eighteen years was long enough to live,” Colby answered.
I knocked my shoulder into his. “Do you know you're more likely to die riding in a plane than jumping out of one?”
“You went skydiving?” Kat asked.
“Yeah.” I grinned.
“Would this have anything to do with why Jamie was gone when I woke up?” Colby asked.
“He's the only one I knew would do it with me.” That was only a half truth. I could have just gone with Parker. In reality, Jamie was the one who needed it as much as me.
“I'm glad there's someone around who's as crazy as you.” Kat smiled, but then I caught Colby's scowl, and my smile faded. He'd always had a problem with me being around any of his friends. He seemed to think that was a recipe for them to fall madly in love with me - or for me to fall madly in love with them. Probably more of the latter because I didn't exactly have his friends hanging on my every word. I wasn't younger than him, five minutes older in fact, but he treated me as fragile.
Like I'd ever be into any of his friends.
Jamie came to mind, but no, I was just starting to not hate him. It couldn't go beyond that. Plus, he had a girlfriend. A perfect, beautiful, popular girlfriend.
“Oh, Kat, almost forgot to ask. How'd your date go this weekend?”
Her cheeks reddened.
“I so don't want to hear this.” Colby grimaced.
“Noah was… well, he was great.” She smiled. “We're going out again tomorrow.”
“On a Monday?” Colby scoffed.
“You're such an old man.” I poked his side. “He wanted to see her again soon. That's cute.”
“Don't you guys have homework?” she asked.
“On it.” I jumped from the couch.
On the way to my room, I heard Colby say, “Since when does she do all her homework, let alone get excited about it?”
“Oh, hush, you,” Kat responded.
I shut my door and grabbed my laptop on my way to the bed. It wasn't due for another week, but suddenly, I couldn't wait to work on the creative writing project. I had so much to say, images flooding my mind, and I didn't want to lose any of it.
My phone dinged with a text.
Jamie: I heard the waves are good. You going?
I thought for a moment, glancing between my phone and my computer then to the surfboard in the corner of the room.
Me: Not this time. Working on our writing project.
His response was immediate.
Jamie: Me too. The waves will always be back.
Jumping out of a plane together seemed to thaw whatever ice had existed between me and Jamie. When we saw each other in the halls at school, we grinned as if we had a secret no one else knew. Maybe we did. We knew how to fly.
After school, his soccer season continued as did my work schedule. When we weren't busy, we all hung out - Colby, Morgan, Jamie, Amelia, and the fifth wheel that was me. Sometimes Parker would join us or just convince me to leave the happy couples to their own devices and go out with her.
I sat in the stands with Jamie and Colby when Morgan and Amelia had soccer games. I hadn't spent so much time with my brother in years.
Sometimes I'd catch Jamie watching me. He'd smile when my gaze connected with his and heat flooded my face. Every. Single. Time. I didn't know what was wrong with me.
We turned our writing projects in on a Monday, and it felt as if I was handing over a piece of myself. Mr. Chase's kind eyes met mine when I released my story into his care. His smile was supposed to put me at ease, but it did the opposite. While writing the story, I hadn't thought of anyone else reading it. It felt deeply personal.
I headed back to my desk, breathing deeply to keep myself from running and snatching back my words.
“I still can't believe you went skydiving for a project.” Morgan scooted her desk closer to mine. “Jamie must be very convincing.”
“It was my idea,” I said quietly, my eyes still focused on the stack of papers on Mr. Chase's desk.
Her eyes widened. “I bow to the queen.” She mock bowed, finally making me laugh.
“It wasn't a big deal.”
“Really?”
“Okay, it totally was.” I laughed. “What d'you and Matthew do, anyway?”
Her face scrunched up in disgust. “Ugh, we just went to the beach for like a second.”
“And you got a story out of that?”
“With some… embellishments.”
She wiggled her eyebrows, but I only looked away. I loved being friends with Morgan, but some days were hard. If Colby wasn’t my brother, I'd probably have been one of those kids they tormented throughout high school. I used to be friends with a few of them before shutting myself off. I knew what they went through. I wasn't strong enough to fight it.
If I was a better person, I'd tell Morgan that how she and her friends treated Matthew was crappy. Heck, the way they treated anyone outside their group sucked. Most of them still didn't talk to me. Only Morgan and occasionally Amelia. If Morgan wasn't dating Colby, would I just be another invisible girl to her?
The sad thing was - I knew the answer to that was a resounding yes.
“You okay today, Cal?” Morgan asked.
“Fine.” The bell saved me. “I have to go to the office before calc.” It was a lie, but one that Morgan believed without question as I ditched her in the hall and hurried toward the stairwell.
At the bottom, I almost collided with the large body of Rick Yellen. He didn't see me as he bulled his way into the stairwell, but I was yanked back as someone wrapped an arm around my waist from behind. My back slammed into a hard chest.
“Watch where you're going, Callie girl.” Jamie chuckled, sending vibrations through my body.
I pushed away from him, needing to get out of the school.
“Wait up,” he called, but I was already booking it toward the front door. I didn't have a car anymore since Old Red died on me, but the beach wasn't far.
Glancing back at the school, I legged it down the sidewalk, needing as much distance as my legs could give. I barely knew most of the kids I went to school with. Some I'd been friends with at one point since I grew up in town, but were no longer part of my life. Others I'd avoided. Or maybe they'd avoided me.
Skydiving had given me a sense of contentment that lasted for a little while, but was wearing out as I lived the same old life with the same old people. I needed another shot.
The beach would give me that feeling as long as I was there, and that was what I needed now. It was an addiction. Could you be addicted to escaping? I didn't even know. Adrenaline? Sure. Forgetting? Definitely.
My jaw dropped when I got to the beach. If there was ever such a thing as perfection, those waves were it. Bigger than we usually got, I couldn't remember surfing in such conditions, but I suddenly co
uldn't think of anything else.
There were a few surfers out there, probably older, with more experience. I didn't care. This was why I'd felt such an urge to leave school. Something was pulling me here.
Only a few problems. I was carless, suitless, and boardless.
But I did have a phone.
Me: Beach. Now.
His response was quick.
Jamie: In class.
I snapped a picture of the waves and sent it.
Jamie: Well, okay then.
I grinned, putting my phone away and parking myself on the rocks.
It didn't take long for the crunch of gravel to signify an oncoming car. Jamie slammed the door and sauntered toward me, an excited look in his eyes.
“I thought you were in class,” I said.
“I may have just walked out.” He whistled through his teeth. “I have to get out there.”
Dusting my pants off as I got to my feet, I turned toward him. “I need my board.”
“Mine is in your garage,” he said.
Once at my house, I sprinted inside while he strapped the boards to the roof of his car. I came back out as he was rifling through a bag in his back seat. Looking through his tinted windows, I saw clothes, pillows, and food wrappers scattered around and shock choked off my words.
He saw me and shame clouded his eyes. “I couldn't very well stay in my father's house right now.”
“So, you're sleeping in your car?” I gasped. “Jamie.”
He looked down, our mission forgotten for just a moment. Before I knew what I was doing, I'd stepped forward and wrapped my arms around him. He stiffened before lowering his head to rest his chin on my shoulder. I squeezed him tighter.
“I'll talk to Kat.” I leaned back to run a hand over his head as if he was a young child. “You should have told me. Colby too. You could've stayed with us.”
“I didn't want you to know.” He pressed the side of his face into my hand.
“Hate to break it to you, but we know your dad is an ass.”
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