by Kate Sander
My child.
I don't think you could ever understand how much I want to be with you. It's always going to be hard to understand why I'm not there, why I don't even know your name. Just know that I love you with everything I have.
Take care of your mother,
Love,
Daddy
34
Carter
"Mmhmm," Carter agreed absent mindedly.
"Well then, that bitch tells me that I never asked for room for cream. Like I wouldn't ask for room for cream?"
His date looked at him expectantly.
"I know you would," Carter agreed casually. Completely uninterested, his thoughts were far away from this terrible blind date that Ram had set him up on. It would be about the time that Senka would be having the baby.
If it had all gone well in the pregnancy. If she'd even survived the war.
No, don't do that, he thought, ignoring the woman prattling on across the table from him. She lived. You know she did.
A beep from his phone had him checking a text on his watch.
Sorry to interrupt, boss. We need you back at headquarters. Ram.
"I have to go," Carter said, interrupting the monologue about coffee creamer. Standing, he looked at the shocked face across from him. "I had a really great time, but I'm not ready to move on from my last relationship." He counted out cash and put it on the table. "That should cover it."
Without a second glance, he strode out of the restaurant.
He hoped that Senka found his time capsule. Then, maybe she'd know that he was thinking of them constantly. Really the only time he wasn't was when he was hanging out with Isaac. Once a week, every week. Mostly watching sports and just chilling in his apartment. It was good for both of them.
Carter's necklace bounced against his chest. A small piece of the black stone that he'd destroyed was hanging inside a small metal casing.
Something to remember them by.
35
Eris
Eris sat at the vanity in the Queen's chambers, slowly taking off her jewelry and staring at herself in the mirror.
"Daughter... Let me go."
Her mother's words echoed through her head, as they always did.
"I'm doing my best," Eris said to the mirror.
Married. And now the Queen of Solias. Today had been a hell of a day. At least now she could finally start being herself.
Her mind flashed back to that pivotal moment in her life, almost a year ago.
The day she'd run from her parents as they'd tortured a prisoner.
"Now," Roald said as he entered the tent, deliberately not looking in Eris' direction. Eris looked down in embarrassment. "I want to get this over quickly. Where is your partner, Senka?"
"You got me," Tomo said. "Probably fucking someone in our world."
Roald hit her on the left side of her face. Eris twitched when she heard the already broken cheek bone shatter to pieces. Her eye was no longer in the proper place and it drooped towards the floor. Eris' stomach roiled. The woman's face was a swollen mess of bruises. Her one eye was a full inch lower than the other, giving her a distorted, gross appearance.
"I don't have time for the attitude or the language," Roald said sharply. "Tell me where she is."
"I don't know," Tomo said, breathing heavily through the pain but holding his gaze with her one working eye. "She was still alive when I died. I don't know."
"Well," Roald said softly, "if that is the case, then we have no choice." He leaned over her and grabbed both sides of her face, forcing her to stare him in his eyes. "What do you fear?"
Tomo started shaking. "No!" she gasped. "NO!" she was trembling and trying to get away, but Roald held her firm, forcing her to look at him. "KELLY, NO!" Tomo screamed.
Eris twitched. The prisoner's greatest fear... had to do with her? She was reeling. She'd never met this woman...
"NOOOOO!" Tomo shrieked.
Roald was showing her a vision of the worst moment in her life. Over and over he'd be playing it, grinding her down, wearing her out. Every time he played it, it would be different but more terrifying, until he came to her greatest fear. That was his Zoya power.
"Fear is a great weapon," Eris mumbled to herself.
"She is ready for you," Roald said to Malin.
Malin bowed and approached the huddled, twitching mess. "You will go and find Senka. You will kill her," she said to her. "You will not stop until this is accomplished or you die. Is that understood?"
Eris backed towards the tent door. This seemed so wrong. Tomo was looking at Malin's eyes, nodding, cheek destroyed, loose tooth hanging from her mouth.
"Kill me," Tomo muttered. The last real thought with her own voice.
"I won't do you that honour," Malin said, mistakenly thinking that Tomo was talking to her.
Eris knew she wasn't. The Empress of Blood was begging Eris to kill her to avoid being a slave.
Eris slowly backed out of the tent door. This wasn't what she wanted.
"That's it," Malin said. "That's it. You will find Senka and kill her, then kill yourself."
"I will find Senka and kill her, then kill myself," Tomo repeated back in a dead voice.
Eris couldn't take it anymore. She turned and fled the tent.
"FIND HER!" Malin shouted from inside the tent. The shout barely reached Eris she was running so fast. Away. Nothing, no family, no power, was better than what was going on here.
She dodged and ducked the Worthless as their arms stretched out to catch her. Eris had to make the tree line a few hundred yards away. That was her only chance.
"FIND HER AND BRING HER BACK!" she heard Malin scream.
Eris fled from the only mother she'd ever known.
She didn't get far before she was grabbed roughly around the waist and dragged, kicking and screaming, back into the tent.
"You're dismissed," Malin commanded the room. General Camora, the man who'd caught her, snickered slightly as he left the tent. Tomo did as she was commanded and left as well, leaving Roald, Malin and Eris alone in the room.
"Sit," Malin commanded.
"Mother, I-"
"I said sit," Malin said, softly this time. Roald walked over and, with a flick of a wrist, pulled two more chairs over to the center of the room.
Roald and Malin sat down.
They didn't look angry. More… proud? Eris wasn't sure what was going on.
"Please don't take over my mind," she rattled on, "I know I fucked up. I'm sorry. Please don't take my mind. Please don't. I don't want to be a Forsaken. I swear I won't do it again-"
"Sit, please."
Shocked at the manners, Eris sat. Roald and Malin looked at each other. Malin nodded to Roald, who looked at Eris.
Eris prepared for the worst. Her fears projected over and over until she went crazy, or worse.
"Don't worry, daughter," Roald said softly. "We knew this day was coming."
"H-h-how? I've never thought of running away before. I've only wanted to be your daughter and to serve you."
"You are a Princess," Malin said softly. "You don't serve anyone. But we knew you'd try to run, sometime."
"We were prepared," Roald continued. "What we do isn't easy. We don't like to do it either. In fact, your mother has cried after turning people."
"Then why do you do it?"
"A long time ago," Roald said, "we had a son." Malin wiped a tear from her eye. Roald continued, "He was taken from us in a heinous act of violence. We were in a small village where a few Zoya lived. We lived in peace. Then, some Melanthios attacked us. Tried to kill us. Purely because we were different. We couldn't save our son."
Malin gripped Roald's hand. "You could say this is about revenge. You wouldn't be wrong. But it’s about so much more than that. It's about peace."
"Peace?"
"Those that we turn into Forsaken are those who could do significant damage to people," Malin said. "I have to control them, or we have to kill them. It's our hope that, after t
he Ampulex reign for a time, we will no longer need to control them. That they will understand and we can convince them that peace is worthwhile."
"I don't understand. How is this not about revenge and your own power?"
Roald smiled gently. "The Melanthios themselves did not attack us. It was a few individuals, acting alone, that changed our lives forever. Control. Control of those few individuals, and it can lead to the happiness of so many others."
"So, you take away free will..."
"For the betterment of society."
It all made sense to Eris. In fact, she couldn't see why it had been so muddled before. They were saving lives, not taking them.
"Sometimes, we have to be strong for all of society," Malin said. "A few of us take the burden, so the rest of them can thrive. So, we take the burden. We take the guilt. As an Ampulex Princess, this is your duty as well."
"I can't turn people."
Malin smiled. "I know that dear, but our reign is going to end soon."
"How? How could you know that?"
"There are plenty of types of Zoya powers," Roald said. "And we've been told. Only a few weeks now until it comes crashing down around us. But, there is a way to make sure everything we've worked for isn't in vain."
"How?"
"You."
"Me? I can't even beat you in a fight. How am I supposed to save you?"
"Not save us," Roald said. "Kill us. You will join the enemy. Gain their trust. And when the time comes, you will kill us. That way, we aren't tortured. Then, only then, by gaining their trust, can you make the final move."
"I-I-I'm not killing you!" She stood, distraught. "How can you even ask this of me? I love you!"
Malin stood and wrapped her in a hug. "We love you too, daughter. But we are going to die. Whether by your hand or someone else’s, we cannot get around it. But, if by your hand, the enemy will trust you."
"Then, you can marry the Prince of Solias and become Queen," Roald said. "Teach your children the ways of the Ampulex. The ways of sacrifice for the greater good, of the smartest making the decisions for the weak, of the Zoya being the Gods of the earth. They will teach their children. And the Ampulex will live forever."
Eris drew herself out of the memory. It had been a tough road. Killing Ampulex, killing her mother... All that for this moment.
"I promise you, the Ampulex will live on, forever."
Epilogue
Senka walked through the woods, alone.
Five years since the birth of Nyx and Langundo was thriving. Kai was the best type of babysitter, and she'd left him and Akira in charge of the kid while she took a much needed solo hunting trip.
Her kid was awesome, but was too smart for her own good and was completely exhausting.
Senka walked with her bow strung across her back. She'd been walking for a few days in one direction.
A direction she knew, but something bigger than her was guiding her there.
Crossing a river, Senka knew the end was coming.
Just a few hundred yards, and she'd be at the place it all started. The clearing in the forest, where she'd woken the first time.
Sitting down when she hit the middle of the clearing, she crossed her legs and waited.
For the inevitable, maybe.
Tears fell silently down her face. As much as this was fate, Senka wasn't ready.
"You're sure about this?"
Tory emerged from the forest. They hadn't talked about meeting there. Tory had never been there before.
It appeared that fate had brought them both together.
"No," Senka said.
Tory sighed, face grave. “So, why now? Nyx needs you."
"I know," Senka said, "but I'm not going to be around much longer. Not unless I go back."
Tory made her way to her friend and sat down. Leaning over her, she took an arrow from Senka's quiver. The same bow and arrows the Queen had given her at the start of all this mess.
"You could be different. Different from all the other Zoya."
"Nah," Senka said, sighing and looking at the sky. It was blue. The bluest thing she'd ever seen. "We're not supposed to be here. It fucks with our brains. I can already feel it starting. The power-hungry anger. The rationalization of the fucked up..."
"Maybe you just need a rest."
"Nyx can't see me turn into them," Senka said. "Armend and Malin and Roald. There's a reason that Zoya are bad guys, Tory. It's our brains. They change."
Tory nodded, joining Senka with her tears. She pulled off her necklace, the one containing the small piece of Remiel. Grasping it in her hand, she grabbed Senka's hand and gripped it tightly. Senka still wore the ring that Jules gave her around her neck. A reminder of what was lost for this new-found peace.
"Been one hell of a ride," she said.
A single thrust upward underneath the ribcage. Tory's aim was true, and she hit Senka's heart.
Senka coughed and collapsed. Tory caught her and lowered her into her lap.
"Nyx," Senka mouthed, staring at Tory's eyes.
"I love her like my own. I'll take care of her." Tory gripped Senka's hands tightly and rubbed the hair from her face lovingly.
Senka looked past her.
The sky was so blue today.
With one last thought of her daughter, everything went black.
Want More?
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OTHER BOOKS BY KATE SANDER
THE ZOYA CHRONICLES
BOOK ONE: Pulse
BOOK TWO: Force
BOOK THREE: Devour
BOOK FOUR: Void
THE HAPPILY EVER AFTER SERIES
The Old Woman Who Lived In a Shoe
The Boy Who Cried Wolf
About the Author
Kate Sander is a Primary Care Paramedic and lives in her hometown of Prince Albert, Saskatchewan, Canada. A massive Saskatchewan Roughriders fan, she prides herself on being a geek and loving football. She lives with her husband Aaron, their six-year old Labradoodle named Sammi and three-year old Goldendoodle named Pippin. Coffee is the elixir of life, and she could eat pizza and tacos for every meal of every day. If you want to talk books, movies, beer or anything and everything geeky, email Kate at [email protected].
Check out www.zoyabooks.com for all your Zoya Chronicles updates and merchandise needs.