by Naomi Martin
“They were out of their minds with worry. They wouldn’t let my dad come out here without them,” she says gently. “You’re a lucky girl. A very lucky girl.”
I feel a smile—the first I’ve had in a while—cross my lips as we stand there, watching the scene before us, watching the boys. My boys. I turn and look at her, nodding.
“Yeah, I am. I’m really lucky,” I say. “Aren’t I?”
Chapter Twenty-Five
It’s been two weeks since the events out at the cabin, and the boys have barely left my side since. It’s like they’re afraid to let me out of their sight for fear of somebody else coming in to snatch me up and steal me away.
The four of us are sitting beneath the giant pine tree in the quad, having lunch. The sun is out but it’s a cool day. Fat, white, fluffy clouds drift across the piercing blue of the sky. It’s rained the previous two days, so it’s nice to be outdoors in the fresh air again.
“So, has your dad told you anything about him?” I ask.
There isn’t any need for me to specify who I’m talking about—we all know.
“Not a lot, unfortunately,” he replies. “He’s apparently some small-time talent scout. That much is true. But the girls he ‘discovers,’ as he puts it, usually wind up doing porn.”
It’s a thought that makes me queasy. The idea that I came that close to being turned out and made to do porn is as terrifying as it is nauseating. But then, he wasn’t talking about putting me in movies. He was talking about us building a life together. Like he wanted to keep me and make me his own, not some porn star.
I look up at him. “H-has he done this before? Kidnapped somebody?”
Xavier shrugs. “They don’t know. He’s never been arrested or charged for it. So far as my dad knows, he was shady as hell but wasn’t actually doing anything illegal. None of the girls he turned into porn stars were underage, and his business was clean.”
“That doesn’t mean he wasn’t doing it,” Lucas chimes in. “Just that he was never caught.”
Ryan chuckles. “Something about you threw the guy off the rails, apparently. Drove him crazy.”
“Great. I guess I’m special.”
Ryan takes my hand and looks me in the eye, his gaze intense. “Yes, you are. Very special. Don’t let this guy make you think there’s something wrong with you or that you did anything wrong. You didn’t.”
“He’s right,” Lucas adds. “This is on him. Not you.”
I sigh and give them all a small, grateful smile. Over the last couple of weeks, I feel like I’ve grown closer to all of them, forming a bond with them that’s unshakable. Indestructible. I don’t know that I could have gotten through all of this without them.
“What’s going to happen to him?” I ask.
Xavier sighs. “He’s going to prison for a while. I mean, he kidnapped you—there’s no getting around that.”
What he’s not saying, though, is that Markham’s going to get out. I don’t know what the mandatory sentence is for kidnapping, but there will come a day when James Markham will be walking the streets again—and my fear is that he’s going to come looking for me.
“My dad said the guy really thinks he’s in love with you,” Xavier says. “Keeps going on and on about the life you guys are going to have together—real nutball stuff.”
I chuckle. “Yeah, that’s not creepy or anything.”
Ryan shrugs. “Well, at least he has good taste. I mean, you are kind of easy to fall in love with.”
There’s a profound moment of silence between us all as the boys exchange looks and shrugs—Lucas and Xavier seeming to be in agreement with Ryan about that. It churns my insides and makes my face flush with warmth. I smile and look away, feeling self-conscious.
“Oh, well, there she is. The damsel in distress and her saviors.”
I roll my eyes as I turn to find Renee walking up to us, her minions in tow just behind her. I turn away and can feel the boys bristling around me.
“It was convenient that your little boy toys here arrived just in the nick of time to save you, huh?” Renee chirps.
“Renee, fuck off,” Ryan snaps.
“Do you always have to be such a bitch?” Xavier jumps in.
“Yeah, this isn’t the time or place.” Lucas adds, his touch delicate as always.
She rolls her eyes. “I see they’re still defending you.”
“That’s because we care about her,” Ryan says. “I know that must not be something you’re familiar with—having somebody actually care about you and all—but it happens.”
“To other people,” Xavier cracks.
“You know, I think she made the whole thing up,” Renee says. “Just to get attention. I bet she got somebody to fake kidnap her just so you guys would have to come rescue her. Make herself look like a victim and get all this sympathy.”
Her minions laugh and pretend to wipe tears from their faces. Renee laughs with them and looks back at us.
“You weren’t there,” Lucas says. “You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“As usual,” Ryan puts in.
“Well, if it was real, it’s just too bad you guys found her,” Renee spits. “It’s a shame her kidnapper didn’t get away with her.”
“Why are you such a bitch, Renee?” Usually mild-mannered and soft spoken, Lucas’ voice is filled with venom. “You’re such a beautiful girl. It’s too bad your personality makes you the ugliest person on the planet.”
“The fact that she kept her head about her and managed to escape shows just how strong she is,” Xavier says. “She has a strength that you’ll never have. Ever. All you’re ever going to be is a pathetic, weak, bully. You only wish you had a fraction of her strength.”
“Fuck off, weasel,” she shrieks.
I get to my feet, anger coursing through every vein in my body. I stand a few inches from Renee, my eyes narrowed, my jaw clenched. As we stare each other down, I realize the quad has fallen strangely quiet. I cut a quick glance and see that everybody has stopped and is watching us. I feel a wave of self-consciousness, but it’s quickly overwhelmed by the thick, abiding anger that’s gripping me.
“What? What are you gonna do?” Renee sneers at me. “You think you’re some big badass now or something? Just because you got kidnapped and had to be rescued? Allegedly, anyway.”
I can feel the boys behind me tensing, bristling with anger. But they don’t step in. They remain quiet, to let me handle this how I see fit. And I love them for it. I love that they don’t see me as a damsel in distress—that they don’t feel the need to step in and protect me all the time. To me, that shows a genuine respect and I’m grateful for it.
“Seriously, Tatum, what are you going to do here?” Renee grins. “Gonna stare me to death?”
Her minions titter like it’s the funniest thing they’ve heard today and I see Renee gaining confidence as she stares back at me. I feel the weight of all the eyes in the quad pressing down on us. It’s nearly suffocating. But I try to shut them all out; this is between me and her.
Renee puts her hand on me like she’s about to push me away and I snatch it off my shoulder, bending her wrist back hard. She cries out in pain as I twist her arm around behind her back and give her a shove forward. As she stumbles, I lash out with my foot, landing a solid kick to her ass. Any hope she had of staying on her feet is lost and she pitches forward, stumbles and then goes down.
Renee lands face down in a soft, muddy patch with a loud splattering sound. She quickly pulls her face up but it’s already completely covered with mud, her wide, outraged eyes looking impossibly white in that dark mess stuck to her face.
“You bitch!”
She roars furiously as she tries to get to her hands and knees to push herself up. I step forward and drive the sole of my foot into her ass again, sending her sprawling back down into the mud. Then I step back and allow her to get to her feet. The front of her is nothing but mud from head to toe. She turns to me, huffing and puffing,
her eyes red and welling with tears. Her minions step back, like they don’t want her to get any of it on them.
It’s then that the laughter starts around the quad. It cascades down over us as everybody points and laughs at Renee. I can’t see her face but if I could, I’m sure it would be bright red with her embarrassment and rage. I don’t know that she’s ever been laughed at before. I kind of doubt it.
She looks at me like she wants to say or do something, but then thinks better of it and turns away as loud sobs burst from her throat. She rushes away from us, heading toward one of the gates, her minions close on her heels. The laughter chases her all the way through the quad, quickening her pace.
When she’s gone, I walk back to where the boys are sitting and plop down, feeling strangely satisfied. I see people all around us looking at me differently, with more respect than I’ve ever gotten before. Some of them flash me a thumbs up and others applaud.
The boys are looking at me, doing their best to hold back their laughter. They can’t keep it in, though, and they laugh until there are tears in their eyes. As I sit there, it feels like something has changed. It feels like some evil curse has been broken, now that the Wicked Witch has been defeated. I somehow feel lighter. Freer. Even happier than I already was. A crushing weight has been lifted off my shoulders and I’m free from the shackles that had been wrapped around my chest, never allowing me to fully breathe thanks to Renee.
Slowly, the laughter fades and the four of us are left there staring at each other. Although we’re all smiling, there’s a tension in the air. A sense of anticipation hovers over us and it’s growing thicker by the minute. I know what they want, but I don’t know that I can give them the answer they’re looking for.
I look away and clear my throat, plucking a few blades of grass as I try to come up with an excuse to get out of here. All three of them give me smiles that tell me I’m not getting out of here until they get what they want.
“So?” Ryan begins. “I believe it’s time for you to make a decision.”
“Past time,” Xavier says.
“I’m ready for it,” Lucas adds.
I sigh and blot my suddenly damp palms on my jeans, my stomach churning wildly. I look up to find them looking back at me expectantly. Steeling my nerves, I sit up and finally meet their gaze.
“The truth is, I can’t make a decision, guys,” I admit. “I care about each of you. I care very deeply for each of you.”
“It seems pretty obvious that we all care about you, too, Tatum.” Lucas gives me a smile.
With Katie’s words echoing through my mind, I look at the boys, taking them all in. I think about what each of them mean to me. I think about the time I’ve spent with them and the different ways they’ve impacted me. It wouldn’t be a lie to say they’ve each had a profound impact on me and have carved out a place in my heart.
Not seeing any one of them again would be a crushing blow, and I don’t know I could bear it. But I don’t know how they’ll react to my suggestion. I may very well end up losing one—or all—of them, anyway. I feel like it’s a case of damned if I do, damned if I don’t.
I need to at least try, though. Giving up on them would be the hardest blow of all. I draw in a deep, steadying breath and let it out slowly—and then begin.
“All three of you have brought something special and unique to my life. Each of you has touched and moved me in ways I never thought possible,” I say. “I could no more choose between the three of you than I could choose which senses I can live without.”
“So, what are you saying?” Xavier asks. “That you want to be with all three of us? That you want us to share you.”
Lucas flashes me a small smile. “That’s exactly what she’s saying.”
I return his smile and look him in the eye, expecting to see something like revulsion at the suggestion. I’m not fully prepared for what I do see, though—nothing but love for me. I look at both Xavier and Ryan in turn and neither one of them seems put off by it, either. It’s something that shocks the hell out of me, to be frank.
“I-I don’t know if it’s possible. I don’t know if the four of us can co-exist in this way,” I say. “But… I love all three of you. I want to be with all three of you.”
There’s a long moment of silence as all four of us exchange looks. I can see their brains spinning, trying to decide if they can do it—if they can share me. Xavier clears this throat and gives me a smile that seems uncertain. He looks over at Ryan and then Lucas, his expression amused and yet serious at the same time.
“You boys are my brothers and I love you,” he says. “This is crazy, but if I were going to do something like this, there’s nobody else I’d be willing to do it with.”
Lucas chuckles. “It’s unconventional, to say the least. But—I’m with Xavier. There’s nobody else on this planet I’d rather do this with.”
They both turn to Ryan. He returns their stare for a minute and then looks at me. His face is unreadable, and yet his eyes are shining with a myriad of emotions. He gives me a slow, warm smile.
“We all love you, Tatum,” he says. “I mean, we all really love you.”
Lucas and Xavier both nod in agreement and I give them a smile, my heart swelling as I take them all in.
“And we all want to be with you,” Ryan continues. “It might be a little bit strange, but there isn’t anybody I could share you with except for those two clowns. I’m in.”
I clap my hands over my mouth, trying to contain my excitement. “So… we’re really doing this?”
They all exchange a look then nod, smiles on all of their faces. I sit back and look at them for a long moment. My boys. I never considered the idea of being with three men at the same time. For all of my feminist leanings, it’s just something that never occurred to me. I figured I would have a hard enough time finding one man who could love me the way I feel I deserve to be loved. I never thought that finding three—all at the same time, no less—was even a possibility.
And yet, here we are. I love all three of them and they love me back. I never knew I could feel this way. Never knew I could feel so complete, or be this happy. But as I survey my boys, I feel my heart swell to the point of bursting.
I’m a stranger here in this town, still learning my way around. But I’m enveloped in warmth and emotion. I’m wrapped up in the love of three good men. And for the first time since I arrived, I feel like I’m home.
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