by Elias Taylor
Mel didn’t regret sleeping with him. That was one silver lining. Tripp had been amazing when it came to their physical pleasures. She shouldn’t have even tried to make him feel bad about that, because whatever else he had done, he had also shown her what true sexual satisfaction was supposed to feel like.
It was everything else that was off. He hadn’t been as ready to commit as she was, that was obvious. And s had been too innocent and optimistic to think everything between them could work out just because they had a nice time for a whole three weeks.
She knew better now.
Mel blinked at the tears that sprang to her eyes. This was pathetic. She was never going to make it an entire two hours.
Mel turned towards her desk. Even sketching out new designs had no allure. In the past, thinking about fashion was the one thing that could always comfort her. She hated Tripp for denying her that. This is what came of love and romance, Mel realized. There were no happy endings, no glorious walking off into the sunset. Just pathetic tragedies and loss of inspiration.
With no friends to talk to and no designs to sketch, she felt trapped.
Her phone rang. Mel didn’t even need to look at it. Tripp had called about a million times since she had stormed out.
She hadn’t picked up or even responded to his texts insisting they needed to talk. It wasn’t that she was being petty or too emotional. It was just that she knew she didn’t want to hear whatever he was going to say.
He was going to say the usual stuff guys said. He was sorry. He didn’t realize she thought it was that serious. He had other things to do. He had his business, that was the number one priority. IT wasn’t like they were married. She had been moving a little fast.
Mel just couldn’t deal with that kind of patronizing treatment, not from Tripp, not right then.
His constant calls were making it difficult for her to recover. Just his name flashing across the screen caused physical pain in Mel’s stomach.
Mel wanted to heal. She wanted to move on from this mess as fast as she could. She would never be able to do that if he kept badgering her.
As the phone rang for the final time, Mel sighed and picked it up. She had to end this here and now, for her own good.
“Hey, please stop calling,” Mel said.
She heard Tripp gasp in surprise at the sound of her voice.
“Mel, I was about to come by to see you,” he said.
“No, don’t do that either,” Mel said.
She had to make him see it was over, and she didn’t need his apology or sympathy. She couldn’t let him worm his way back into her heart. She kept her voice calm and level. No screaming, no shouting, no insults. Just the facts, dreary as they were.
“You need to let it go,” Mel said. “Go to New York, be happy. I want you to go.”
“Mel, I –”
“You have been working on your bikes for so long, you have to take this opportunity,” Mel said. “Chances like this don’t come around every day, we both know that.”
“Mel, I miss you,” Tripp said. “These past few days have been awful.”
Those words hurt more than all his calls. How dare he miss her? She had been missing him, but she hadn’t been the one to decide to move across the country. He had no right to miss her.
“Tripp, your bike designs are too good for you to pass this up just because you miss me,” she said.
“I really care about you,” Tripp said.
Mel blinked and two tears streaked down her face. She poured all her efforts into making sure her voice didn’t crack as she spoke. Maybe she was crying like a baby, but Tripp didn’t have to know that.
“I’m your sister’s best friend, of course you care about me,” Mel said. “But not as much as your bikes.”
Tripp stammered on the other end of the line. Mel knew he cared about her. He hadn’t been totally indifferent. But she was just a girl it was fun to date. Someone he could pursue and feel a bit risky about it. Nothing more.
“Let it go,” Mel said. “Go to New York and be happy.”
There was silence on the other end. She had to accept that as a goodbye.
“Go to New York,” Mel repeated. “Be happy.”
Then she hung up.
As soon as she was off the line, Mel heaved a sob. She clutched her stomach with her hands.
It hurt. It hurt so bad.
When she was sixteen, Mel had submitted some of her designs to a competition. She had poured her heart and soul into her work, and she thought for sure she had a shot at winning.
She didn’t even get an honorable mention. Just a rejection. Sorry, not good enough.
Mel had been devastated. She had been positive that this meant she was completely without talent. She should give up on her dream of breaking into the fashion world.
Christina had found Mel crying in the bathroom at school after the email rejection arrived. When Christina had finally managed to coax the issue out of Mel, Christina had scoffed.
“Is that it?” Christina asked. “You didn’t win a dumb competition?”
“You don’t understand,” Mel had sobbed. “I’m not good enough.”
“So you’re just gonna give up just because a few people didn’t love your designs?” Christina said.
Mel had blinked at her friend.
“Well, that’s absurd,” Christina said. “I love your designs, and loads of other people think you’re great, and you just need to toughen up and keep going.”
It had been the best advice. Mel had wiped her tears away and picked herself up. She had kept working on her skills. She had gotten better. And then she had gotten herself into the Fashion Institute in LA. All thanks to Christina’s pep talk at a pivotal moment.
Now Mel was at another pivotal moment. She was weak and vulnerable and devastated all over again. And Christina wasn’t there.
Mel smiled through her tears though. Because she knew what Christina would say. It would be the same thing she had said all those years ago in the high school bathroom.
“Is that it? You don’t get to date my dumb brother?”
Mel had survived that early rejection. She would just have to toughen up and survive this rejection as well.
But first, she was going to cry just a little bit more.
Chapter Twenty: Happy Again
Tripp inhaled the scent of the New York City street. It was in a bustling section of downtown Manhattan. People streamed by the storefront.
Tripp had been exhausted ever since landing that morning, but Wayne seemed to feed off the energy of the massive city.
They had shared lunch at Wayne’s favorite diner and then caught a cab to the storefront Wayne wanted to buy.
Tripp had to admit, it was an ideal option. The auto shop’s long-time owner was looking to retire, so it was decked out with all the equipment he would need. Plus, the previous owner had run a successful business for over 20 years, proving that the location was prime.
“Between street traffic and word of mouth, you’d be set,” Wayne said. “And this is New York, people would travel here to commission bikes, no question.”
Tripp looked up at the storefront. Wayne was right. It just felt all wrong.
As Wayne led him around the inside, Tripp couldn’t pay attention. He knew he should be laser-focused on this critical part of his design business, but Tripp couldn’t stop thinking about Mel.
She had sounded so off on the phone. So empty of any feeling. He was driving himself crazy trying to guess if that was because she didn’t care for him as much as he had thought or if it was all an act to protect her heart.
Tripp should have been the one protecting her heart. It was all he ever wanted. He had found that once-in-a-lifetime type of connection with someone, and he had thrown it all away by not being straight-forward. He could tell himself that Mel had overreacted and not let him explain, and that was all true, but he should have known Mel was bound to be sensitive. This was her first big relationship, Tripp should have been
more mindful of that.
Wayne interrupted Tripp’s guilty thoughts.
“It’s got this huge space for displaying, it’s really a miracle,” Wayne said. “In New York, to get this much space is a total steal.”
Tripp nodded along. He wanted to be enthusiastic for Wayne’s sake at least. Wayne was truly excited. He wasn’t exactly what Tripp had pictured. Instead of finely-tailored suits, Wayne wore jeans and sneakers with a button-down shirt. He was middle-aged and quite average-looking. Not tall, not short. Not thin, not fat. Beneath his middle-of-the-line appearance, there was an active mind. He wore his business acumen lightly, and Tripp was drawn to him. He really was the ideal business partner.
Yet when Wayne was speaking, Tripp kept spacing out. He had tried to call Mel back after their conversation. He had waited a day, then called. There was so much more to say. She couldn’t say it was over, Tripp hadn’t explained anything.
He had called right before he got on the flight to New York. The entire six hours in the air, he had wondered if his phone was missing a call or text from Mel. He was sure she was going to call him, and he wouldn’t pick up because he was in the air.
As soon as they landed, he had turned his phone off airplane mode and stared at the screen in agony as no new alerts came through from Mel.
So he called her again.
He knew he could send a text explaining everything. How she meant so much to him and how he was all in on their relationship. But it felt wrong to say such things for the first time over text. He wanted to see her face when he put his entire heart on the line.
“And I mean, once people start talking about your designs, that’s when it will take off,” Wayne said. “It’s true what they say, all roads lead to New York.”
Tripp didn’t want all his roads to lead to New York. He wanted his roads to lead to wherever Mel was.
Tripp couldn’t believe this. After all the time he had spent longing to start his own custom bike shop and dreaming of this day, he wasn’t happy at all. He only wanted Melissa. He wanted to walk right out of that auto shop, hop in a car, and go straight to La Guardia Airport so he could get back on a plane back to California.
He managed to nod along as Wayne explained the price points and the process of getting everything set up. Wayne had an intense plan that would get the shop up and started by the first quarter of the next year.
“It’s an accelerated timeline, but since you’ve got all the designs, it’s possible,” Wayne said. “You’ve done the hard part, the rest is just admin.”
“It all sounds a little intimidating,” Tripp said.
“Don’t worry,” Wayne said. “Admin is my specialty.”
Wayne flashed Tripp a smile and continued to talk about his projections and the bikes and possible marketing plans.
He really did believe in Tripp’s abilities. That was perhaps the best part about Wayne. Beneath his savvy business-sense, Wayne was really passionate about custom bikes. He admired Tripp’s skills, and he had raved about some of the designs Tripp had sent him.
Tripp should have been over the moon to have an investor like Wayne. Instead, Mel’s final words to him played like a funeral march in his head.
Go to New York. Be happy. Go to New York. Be happy.
He was in New York, but he was definitely not happy. How could she think he could be happy without her?
He needed to explain. It couldn’t be over text, and it couldn’t be over the phone. They needed to sit down together and have a real conversation. He had to win Mel back.
As the day wore on, and Tripp and Wayne continued their conversation, Tripp did his best to pay attention. In the back of his mind, he kept telling himself that this would all be easier with Mel. Once he got Mel back, this wouldn’t be so terrifying.
He wouldn’t make it without Mel. Tripp realized that now. Having a dream was one thing, but none of his successes would be worth it if he lost Mel in the process.
He would be back in California tomorrow. He would talk to Mel. Then he would be happy again.
Chapter Twenty-One: Honesty
Mel winced as a pitchy rendition of “Hey Jude” assaulted her ears. She and Christina were spending their Friday night at a karaoke bar. Christina’s choice. Mel figured she owed her friend at least that.
After some deep contemplation and some self-berating and a lot of crying, Mel had decided to come clean to Christina. First of all, she was selfish and wanted Christina’s help in dealing with her heartbreak. Second, Mel knew that if Christina ever found out down the road about Mel and Tripp, Christina would lose it. She hated being left out, and if the secret got out a year or two later, it would be way worse.
Mel supposed both her reasons were pretty selfish, in the end, but she was still determined to confess and pay penance.
At her apartment, Mel had dedicated hours to trying to draft a speech to explain. All her preparation was useless because sitting across from Christina in the sparkling and peppy karaoke bar, Mel had no clue how to start.
She ran through a few options in her head.
I have something to tell you.
I did something bad.
I made a mistake, and I’m scared to tell you, but I have to.
Mel couldn’t figure out how to get the words out of her mouth.
“You ok?” Christina asked. “You look a little squeamish, like you’re about to puke or something.”
Mel had the insane urge to pretend to be ill. She could go right home and hide under her covers and tell Christina tomorrow.
“I’m ok,” Mel said.
Christina just raised her eyebrows at Mel’s pathetic lie.
“Alright, I’m not ok,” Mel admitted.
Now was the time to just say it. Just tell her what happened.
I fucked your brother.
No, she could not say that.
“I’m trying to figure out how to say this,” Mel said.
To her embarrassment, she was tearing up. The only thing worse than crying for two days straight in her bedroom was crying at a bar.
“Sweetie, hey, calm down,” Christina said. “Just start at the beginning.”
Mel met Christina’s eyes and saw that they were filled with love and concern.
So Mel did exactly what Christina suggested. She started at the beginning.
“I’ve always had a crush on your brother,” Mel blurted out. “Since we were kids.”
“Ok,” Christina said.
She was totally confused.
“About a month ago, he told me that he was attracted to me,” Mel said. “And then we slept together.”
Christina’s jaw hit the floor. An array of emotions crossed over Christina’s face: shock, anger, pain.
“Mel, what the actual fuck?” Christina asked.
The world shrunk to just the two of them. Mel couldn’t lose Christina, not so soon after losing Tripp. She had to make her friend understand, even if it was shocking. Even if Christina was mad, Mel could take that, as long as she could hope for forgiveness at some point.
The entire story spilled out. Mel told Christina about the night before the anniversary party, and then the beach. She skipped over the details, something Christina seemed incredibly relieved about. Then she got to the secret dating, which caused extensive eye-rolling from Christina.
At last, Mel got to the painful part. Discovering the note about New York, realizing they weren’t on the same page. The awful fight.
“I just feel awful,” Mel said. “And so stupid.”
“Well, I mean,” Christina said. “Mistakes were made.”
“But this is what I get for messing around with Tripp,” Mel said. “It never should have happened, and now I know better.”
“Hey, I’m not saying I’m totally ok with what you did, and honestly, I’m really confused,” Christina said. “But I’m also here for you, especially if you’re hurting.”
“Really?” Mel asked.
She could hardly believe her luck in having
a friend like Christina.
“Sure,” Christina said. “I’m even down to beat up my brother if I have to.”
Mel laughed.
“No,” Mel said. “Honestly, it just feels good to say it out loud, I’ve felt terrible carrying around this secret.”
Christina reached out and gripped Mel’s hand.
“I’m sorry it’s been rough,” Christina said.
“And I’m sorry about going after your brother and then not telling you until now,” Mel said.
Christina studied Mel. She chewed her lower lip, a sure sign that she was thinking.
“You still care about him, don’t you?” Christina asked.
Mel glanced down at the scuffed-up wooden table.
“Yeah,” Mel said.
“I could honestly kill him,” Christina said. “Seriously, I knew he slept around, but I thought he knew better than this.”
“No, he’s not a bad person,” Mel said. “And I’m pretty sure he actually does care about me in some ways, just not enough to really commit.”
Christina gave Mel a sympathetic look. Mel wondered if Christina even believed that Tripp cared.
“I guess I just fell in love too fast,” Mel said. “And I think it’s going to be hard until he officially moves and I go to LA.
“Wow, you’re using the word ‘love’?” Christina said.
Mel shrugged. It was what it was. She had fallen in love without taking proper precautions, and now she was paying the consequences.
“You know, everything happens for a reason,” Mel said. “Maybe I was meant to go through this right before heading to LA as a reminder that I need to focus on my designs and career, nothing else.”
Christina snorted and took a swig of her beer.
“That sounds a little too boring to be destiny,” Christina said.
Mel shrugged. She was fine with a boring destiny, as long as she didn’t have to hurt like this ever again.
“Hey, but can we rewind a bit to the part about you losing your virginity?” Christina asked. “That’s kinda a big deal.”