by J. E. Cluney
“Don’t take it personally, trust me, Marcus went through some bad crap, but it’s not my place to tell you. Just know that he’s the way he is for a reason, he may be a jerk, but he’s not actually that bad,” Skip gave me a smile, revealing those two sets of dazzling teeth. How did they stay so white with all the alcohol and crap he ate?
“Fine,” I said as I sipped my drink. I did wonder what Marcus had gone through though. Maybe I should ease off on him. Not that I’d been rude or anything really. He didn’t join us much, and I hadn’t seen him since our Game of Thrones moment. When he’d reacted to my arousal.
Damn.
I focused on my food as Skip rejoined the guys for their game of pool. I sat quietly with Oliver, talking here and there about things I’d read about, supes that I had learned interesting facts about. I couldn’t believe the amount of empty stubbies that were piling up on the bar, and they moved onto cans once they’d drank through the two cartons. They were onto their third game now, and my over listening had informed me that Richo had a girlfriend, whom he’d been with since early high school. Lucky lady.
Skip paid him out for this, baffled at the idea of settling down so soon. It was quite obvious he was a player, and yet I couldn’t deny I was still attracted to the rather bogan roo shifter.
“You know, Jane says your sister is starting uni this year too,” Richo said suddenly when the conversation had died down.
I frowned as Lucas tensed his jaw, tightening his grip on his pool cue as he focused on the table as Skip sunk another ball.
Now I was intrigued. Was there some issue between Lucas and his sister?
“Why would he care bro? What’s the point in telling ‘im?” Issac said, seemingly unhappy with Richo’s announcement.
“Just in case he runs into her, don’t want him caught by surprise, that’s all,” Richo said.
“Thanks, but you needn’t worry,” Lucas growled, his demeanor unsettling. I’d thought he was laid-back like Skip, but he looked mighty displeased with this news.
“Okay, I just thought, y’know,” Richo shrugged as he pursed his lips.
“Well, we stopped talking years ago, I moved here, much to my family’s pleasure, and things have been better than ever,” Lucas said coldly as he watched Issac take his turn.
So, Lucas was estranged from his family? I’d had my suspicions about Ollie, since he was so tight-lipped about his family, but I wouldn’t have guessed with Lucas.
“Okay,” Richo nodded, looking like he’d wished he’d never brought it up.
“How long have you known Lucas, Richo?” I asked, wanting to relieve the tension a bit. He looked thankful as his shoulders relaxed a little.
“Jeez, since mid high school, when I met Jane. She was friends with Lucas’s sister, they hung out a lot, and I happened to run into him when I dropped her off one time. Hit it off, been friends since,” he smiled, but it faltered when he flicked his gaze to Lucas, who was silent as he took his turn. He looked like he was boiling just beneath the surface as he struck the ball with more force than necessary and sinking the white along with a colored. He cursed softly at this, and Richo shot me a look as he bit his lip.
“Well, it’s been nice hanging with you guys, but I think I’m going to have a shower and maybe do some more reading before bed,” I said, wanting to escape the uneasiness in the room. I’d glanced at the clock over behind the bar which informed me it was eight thirty. I really wanted to have a shower before bed tonight.
I stood up, glancing at Ollie who looked like he wanted to slink off with me but decided against it.
He certainly wasn’t going to sneak into the bathroom again, that was for sure. The memory made a smile play at my lips even as I cringed.
I left the boys to their game and drinking as I already imagined the warm water washing over me. It had cooled down considerably with the rain still hammering down on us, and climbing the stairs only made it grow louder as it belted down on the roof.
I slipped into my room and gathered up my grey love heart pajama set from off the bed and a pair of clean underwear before heading out to the bathroom and locking the door behind me.
I stripped down and climbed into the shower and turned the handle on. As much as I would’ve liked to have a soak, I didn’t feel like it was my place to do so. I’d have to check to see if the place was on town water or tank water.
The warm water washed over me and I relaxed as I warmed myself up. This was so much better than my shower at my old rental, with its pathetic water pressure and broken fan, which meant I had to leave the window open instead. Thankfully it was a two-story so no one could peer in, but due to it being a more modernized bathroom, the shower had no door or curtain, and the cold air seeping in over winter had made showers horrible.
Nothing like this one though. The fan was on this time, and I could enjoy this shower much more than last night’s one now that I felt more at home after having met everyone and getting to know them.
I soaped myself up, humming softly to a tune of AC/DC as I wondered about my housemates. Three of them were charming and sweet, and Marcus, well, now I knew that there was more to him being a jerk. I wondered if he’d ever tell me.
I wouldn’t pry, just like I didn’t want them to pry about my family life. I thought I’d avoided the topic of my family fairly well. They knew about my Aunt, but not her boyfriends. I’d like to keep it that way.
I clenched my teeth as a wave of inner pain washed over me.
“Little girls need to learn their place!”
The sharp pain of the belt striking behind my knees made me cry out as I fell against the table, clutching frantically at the edge of it to stay upright as my legs stung from the hit.
“This is not your home, you learn to speak only when spoken to!”
I winced at the incoming strike, gritting my teeth against the pain.
I shook my head at the horrid memory, trying to push it from my mind. It was only one of many similar incidents.
“You’re nothing. Not even your own mother wanted you,” my Aunt spat as I sat huddled in the corner of my room, only twelve years old.
I gasped as the tears sprung forth, sniffling as I wept softly. Why had those memories flared up so suddenly?
I ended my shower early, my body trembling as the horrid words and beatings sliced through my mind as if it was just yesterday.
I grabbed my towel from the rail and dried off, trying to rein in my upset emotions as I tried to think of something else. Anything else.
“Tell me, little one, how does it feel, how does it feel for your flesh to burn?”
I growled as I pulled my underwear on, tugging on my pajamas and hanging my towel back up as I dried my tears and sniffled.
I’d gotten away from all that. I was free. I had to remind myself of that.
I drew in a deep breath before flicking the fan and light off before stepping out into the hall.
I froze as I spied Marcus stepping out of his room, those icy eyes falling on me.
His jaw tightened as he took in my face.
I could only imagine how puffy my eyes were. Great. Just what I needed right now.
“What?” I hissed, annoyed when I had to sniffle.
Marcus’s eyes softened a little, and he stepped forward, like he wanted to say something.
Then those eyes snapped down as he sighed and averted his gaze.
Just like I thought. I wasn’t worth the effort.
I knew my mind was still fraught and I shouldn’t have thought it, but I still did as I stormed into my room and slammed the door behind me.
Marcus wasn’t the only one with things that haunted him. I thought I’d gotten good at hiding it, forcing it away. Guess I’d lowered my guard and gotten too comfortable around the boys today.
I headed straight for my bedside table, groaning when I remembered my iPod had died. I tugged the drawer open and pulled the charger out, popping it on immediately. I needed to drown out everything.
I climbed onto my bed, ignoring the pile of books I’d set down on the floor beside it as I curled under the blanket.
A soft knock on the door made my throat tighten.
“Ally? It’s Ollie. Can I come in?” the muffled voice asked.
I sighed, swallowing as I forced myself to smile.
“Of course.”
Ollie slowly opened the door, giving me a sad smile.
“Marcus said you seemed upset, that you could use someone to talk to,” he said softly.
“Marcus should mind his own business,” I snapped, but then closed my eyes as I sucked in a breath.
“Are you okay?” Ollie asked after a moment as he sat down on the end of the bed.
“Why does Marcus avoid me so much?” I asked, wanting to divert the question.
“Skip said it wasn’t our place to tell, but I can tell you this, he had a problem once with a fae girl, people got hurt. So I think being around you reminds him of that,” Ollie murmured.
I sat up as I cocked my head at this. People had gotten hurt? Did he mean he hurt her? Because of what he is?
“Well, I guess that’s somewhat understandable then,” I mumbled, feeling a bit guilty for being so annoyed with him now. Never assume. That was something I tried not to do, but it wasn’t easy, especially with how cold Marcus had been.
He’d looked genuinely concerned though when I’d come out of the bathroom, and for a moment, I thought he might let his guard down. Seemed he was better than me at keeping himself protected.
“So, why were you upset?” Ollie asked gently as he pulled his legs up to sit cross-legged.
I pulled the blanket up to my chin as I sat with my knees up in front of me, resting my arms on them.
“Just some crap that happened in the past, remembered it a bit,” I said, my throat tightening as I frowned.
“Do you want to talk about it?” he asked with a soft smile.
“Not really, we all have things we’d rather not share,” I said, and he nodded understandingly.
“Yeah, but sometimes, eventually, it helps to tell someone. When you’re ready,” he said as he played with the frayed ends of his denim shorts.
“Did it help you?” I asked.
He chuckled as he cocked his head at me. “Lucas was there for me, he knows everything that happened. I find it hard to tell others about the issues with my family, we all have secrets here, all of us. I know you do too, I saw those burns on you the other day, figured I wouldn’t mention it,” he murmured. “But if you ever want to get it off your chest, you can talk to me.”
“You barely know me,” I shot back with a small smile.
“I feel like I do,” he shrugged. “I know it’s only your second day here, but I feel like we already know each other.”
I understood that. I wasn’t sure why, but I felt the same with most of them. Like I belonged already. Maybe it was because I’d never felt so welcome before, even at the house I grew up in.
“Why are your eyes that color? Were they always like that?” I asked, wanting to move to an easier topic. Ollie seemed to understand this, and didn’t try to pry.
“Well, since I got cursed, they got stuck like this. When I’m about to shift, they turn into slits. I can sometimes change them to slits too if I want to try to see things better. Cats have good eyesight,” he explained.
“Huh, cool. What color are they normally then? Before this happened?” I asked, intrigued by this tidbit of information.
“To be honest, I’m not sure anymore, green I think, although the boys say they were more hazel. They’ve been this way for so long, I’ve actually forgotten a bit,” he said with a soft laugh, but his brow was furrowed at the struggle to remember.
“That must be weird," I murmured.
“I got used to it. Hey, would you like to have some ice-cream? Ice-cream makes everything better,” he gave me his boyish grin, and I softened. “We can maybe watch a movie in the living room, I’m guessing the others will be out in the games room for most of the night.”
“Sure, sounds good,” I said. God, he was so kind and understanding. And I was forever grateful that he didn’t demand answers from me. He understood that sometimes we needed to hide things, to protect ourselves. I might tell him, one day, if I felt like I needed to.
“Do the others know I was upset?” I asked as I pulled myself out of bed.
“No, Marcus found me in the kitchen when I was raiding the fridge… I might have stolen one of your Freddo’s,” he said sheepishly with a light smile.
“Well, since you’re getting me ice-cream, I’ll forgive you,” I chuckled. So even with my name on it, it might still get raided. I didn’t mind though. Ollie was too adorable to be mad at, and it was just food.
“We can find something on Netflix, maybe a comedy. I think that’ll be a good choice,” he suggested as he led the way out of my room.
I followed after the shifter, my heart squeezing at his kindness. I’d really won the lottery getting this room it seemed. Not only were my housemates all attractive, but the majority of them were charming and sweet. No bad intentions anywhere.
Well, Skip was debatable, I’d seen him checking me out a few times, but I enjoyed it, taking it as a compliment. I’d just make sure not to fall too much for him. Although, after my last boyfriend, I had become a bit of a one-night stand kind of girl.
No. You don’t need that, Ally. Not with your housemate. You’d have to live with him, for as long as my course took, which was several years.
Yeah, no. If things turned sour, that would make it hard, and finding another rental would take time, making it awkward.
“So, you said your second boyfriend was human. Guess that didn’t last for obvious reasons?” Oliver asked as we entered the kitchen and he went for the fridge. It was one of those two door fridges, with a freezer on one side with an automatic water and ice dispenser set into the door.
“We were together for a year, and it was quite good, but I felt like I was lying, hiding a main part of me for so long. We had our occasional fights like anyone, but eventually I realized I couldn’t live like that, hiding who I was. And it’s forbidden to tell humans about us,” I sighed as I sat down at the table. I didn’t mind talking about Keith, he’d been good. A tradie who spent most of his afternoons in front of the TV with a beer, but he’d never hit me. Sure, we’d fought, we’d yelled, I’d broken down. Even he had never known the extent of my childhood issues. It would be too difficult to explain while keeping quiet about the magic.
Sometimes I wondered if it was the wedge that divided us too much. He’d been a few years older than me, but the lead up to our break-up had been sad. I knew he was beginning to question us too, he knew I’d been hiding things from him. But he wasn’t like me, he was a strong man, hiding his emotions all the time, using anger instead of sadness. It was something I’d disliked about him, sometimes I’d wished he’d just cry when he got upset rather than yell.
But he’d never hit me, and he’d apologized.
We still drifted apart though, and I knew it was my fault. I couldn’t ever open up to him properly. We were different.
After that, I avoided relationships. I didn’t want to form such a personal connection to someone to tie me down. I was young, and I wanted to explore my sexual side.
If only my memories would stop haunting me.
“That sucks. There are some supes who’ve made it work, but it’s so much easier to be with another supe, you don’t have to hide anything,” Oliver said as he struggled to shovel out the ice-cream.
I watched in amusement as the spoon bent and he scowled.
“That’s why you use the ice-cream scoop like you’re supposed to,” I pointed out.
Oliver just shot me a deadpan look before sighing in defeat and rummaging for the scoop in the middle drawer. I’d opened that when looking for cutlery, it seemed to hold all the other odd utensils.
He served up the vanilla ice-cream with a hefty amount of milo sprinkled over the to
p, and then we were heading out into the living room.
I smiled softly at Marcus who was perched on the lounge, and he gave me a brief glance as I sat on the other red lounge with Oliver.
“Sorry I snapped at you,” I said as I tried to give Marcus an apologetic smile.
“It’s fine,” he said gruffly as he focused back on his screen with his headphone still on.
I turned to Oliver with a raised eyebrow, and he just shrugged.
Guess it was a step in a good direction. Maybe.
I pulled my legs up and nestled back as I began eating my ice-cream while Oliver got Netflix up.
“Have you seen the Good Place?” Ollie asked as he sat down on the lounge beside me with the PlayStation control in hand.
“No, I haven’t,” I admitted.
“It’s pretty good I think, I’ve seen a few episodes but no one else would watch it with me. It’s funny. ” He shrugged, but I could see the hope in his eyes as he waited for my response. God, those amber eyes were so unique.
“Sure, we can watch it, from the start though,” I added. I liked to see things right from the beginning, that way I knew what was going on.
“Awesome!” he grinned as he sat back, sifting through the shows on the screen until he found it.
I glanced over at Marcus, his feet resting on the coffee table as he focused on the laptop in front of him, the faint glow lighting up his face.
It made him look deathly white, not the attractive white that he normally had, this was duller, more lifeless. I felt a little sorry for him. What secrets did he have? Why was he so withdrawn from people?
I knew the feeling a little bit. I’d withdrawn from people after Derek, but then I’d met Keith, who’d helped me find myself again and open up just by being good to me. Sometimes I wished he could’ve been a supe, so we could’ve made things work.
But that was the past, a relationship I’d had while I was seventeen and eighteen. That had ended over nine months ago. And despite having spent a year of my life with him in it, it had been a clean break-up. We’d both known it wasn’t working anymore, and we’d agreed to be friends.
Not that I’d stuck to that. I wanted friends who I could relate to on a deeper level.