by Ember Davis
The shop is closed today in celebration and I couldn’t be happier because whenever our whole family can get together it’s the best. All of Higgins Security and Suburban Outcasts are at Amelia and Beckett’s house along with the extended family which now includes Ellen, Zeke’s parents and brothers, along with Nate, Sam and the baby they adopted, my nephew Oliver. Yes, it is a nod to my name and I totally cried when they told me. Walsh’s sister, Bailey, is now a permanent fixture in our lives and has been since she came home after her college graduation.
It seemed like it might be easy for Zeke’s parents to integrate back into his life when Brian first came into the shop. I was naïve to think that it would be. It could have been a lot worse, trust me, but the first time Zeke and I went to his hometown was awkward as hell. His mom, Carolyn, is hard to read and isn’t the warmest person. I don’t think she means to be that way. I get the feeling that it is just the kind of person she is.
That first visit I went in support of Zeke and so I followed his lead when it came to his mom. At least at first. However, since I will always put Zeke’s feelings first, I made sure to get a little alone time with her. Amelia would have been so proud of me; I was mentally channeling her the entire conversation.
We were in the kitchen while Zeke was outside with his brothers and Dad shooting a few hoops. I guess that’s something they used to all do together. I was glad to see him reliving good childhood memories.
We were loading up the dishwasher from dinner, “Carolyn, dinner was wonderful. Thank you.”
She looked a little surprised, “It wasn’t much. Brian did the cooking.” She cleared her throat, “I can’t do as much around the house as I used to be able to.”
I turned and faced her so that she had my full attention, “I’m sure that’s a big adjustment. I’m sure it makes raising teenage boys even harder.” I reached out and gave her hand a squeeze, “I’m glad that you’re on the road to recovery.”
She nodded absently, “It gave me a lot of time to think about things.”
I smiled warmly, “I’m sure it did. Facing your own mortality changes you.”
She scoffed, “What would you know about facing your own mortality?”
I arched my eyebrow at her, not wanting to make an enemy but not caring if she wasn’t my biggest supporter. I have Zeke for that. “I know that I’m young so it might be hard to believe, but I do understand what it’s like facing what it means to die and examining your life because of it.” I took a deep breath, “My parents were killed in a car accident when I was 16 by a drunk driver. One day they were there, excited about everything their children were doing and looking forward to retiring in a few years.” I smiled wistfully, “They had so many plans, so many places they wanted to travel.”
Carolyn stiffened slightly and for a split second I saw the icy exterior crack, “I’m sorry for your loss, Olivia.”
“Thank you. Not many people know this, but I was supposed to be in the car with them. I wasn’t feeling well so I stayed home. If I had been in the car, I would have died along with them.” I shrug, “At the time I thought I would never get out of that darkness. I didn’t know how to grieve. I didn’t know how to live. I was in limbo for a long time and felt so lost. Then I figured out that I wasn’t honoring my parents that way. I might as well have been dead the way I was living and that made me take a hard look at who I was and who I wanted to be.” Carolyn studied my face, “So, I pulled myself together and forged my own path. I put the past in the past and figured out a way to make my talent into something they’d be proud of.”
She cleared her throat and looked out at Zeke in the backyard. Her voice was quiet, “I am proud of my son. I have missed him.”
I gave her a small smile, “I’m glad. He thought he needed that for a long time, for you to be proud of him. That’s why he took your guilt and your grief on his own shoulders when he had his own grief to process. It wasn’t right.”
Her shoulders slumped, “I know.”
I nodded, “Good. I realize that you’re trying to do the right thing, but I want you to know what I told Brian when he came in the shop. I will not allow Zeke to be hurt. I will not allow anything else to be piled on top of him, especially when he’s just starting to get out from under it.” She opened her mouth, but I cut her off, “Not even from his own parents. I love him and he has a family that will stand behind him just as much as we’ll hold him up if we need to. That’s what families do and while you may be making up for it now, you did a poor job of it when it mattered the most.”
Carolyn studied my face for a long moment while my heart thudded in my chest. I really don’t like confrontation, but for Zeke I’d do what needed to be done. I’d do anything.
Carolyn nodded, “I don’t want to hurt him, not again.” She took a deep breath, “He’s lucky to have you Olivia.”
I reached out and gave her arm a little squeeze with a small smile. Then I looked out at him, playing with his brothers, his face filled with a broad smile. “I’m lucky to have him too.”
After that conversation, she warmed up a little more with every visit, but she’s no June Cleaver, that’s for sure. It isn’t that she doesn’t love her son, she clearly does, but she has a harder time showing it. It made me understand why Brian came to see Zeke by himself.
His brothers are hilarious and have been texting me the last few weeks full of excitement at seeing the guys from SO again. The band was busy when everyone met up in Vegas for Amelia and Beckett’s wedding and didn’t get to spend a lot of time with us which meant that the twins didn’t get their celebrity fill. I’ve already warned SO that the twins might be a little clingy. They laughed it off like it was no big deal, but I hope they remember that when they’re looking around hoping to be rescued by someone.
Beckett did the smart thing and decided to have our gathering catered instead of trying to cook for all of us. He didn’t want any more responsibilities on Amelia and I totally get that. Even though their son is the cutest, he’s also a newborn.
When Zeke and I arrive at their house we’re some of the first to arrive. I head straight for Amelia who’s holding Etheridge against her shoulder. When Amelia sees me her face lights up and I make gimmie hands at Ridge. Seriously, can they bottle baby smell? It’s addicting. I can’t keep my nose away from his little head whenever he’s in my arms.
Amelia hands him over to me and I cradle him in my arms. He’s the spitting image of his father and when he turns his green eyes on me, his little face lights up in a smile. My eyes widen and I look at Amelia, “Did he just smile at me?”
Amelia chuckles, “Yeah, he’s started doing that in the last few days. Doesn’t it just make you melt?”
“Wow,” I murmur as I sit on the couch and hold Ridge in my lap so we can look at each other. I coo at him, “I missed you Ridge. Did you miss your Aunt Liv?”
He gurgles at me as Zeke comes over and leans down and kisses my temple. He whispers, “You look really good with a baby on your lap, little fairy.”
When I smile up at him his eyes darken, and I know that his thoughts are on us making our own baby. We’ve talked about it, but we wanted to wait a little while longer. We’re so young. From the look in Zeke’s eyes, we might not be waiting that much longer. I bite my lip and his eyes zero in on the movement like a laser.
His voice is gruff, “Can I hold my nephew now?”
I hand him over and Zeke cradles him in his arms. Jesus. I think my ovaries just exploded. Ridge reaches up and tangles his little fingers in Zeke’s beard. Zeke just laughs which makes Ridge smile and Zeke’s eyes round.
Beckett walks into the living room and wraps Amelia up in his arms. He rests his chin on her shoulder. “Isn’t that amazing? He changes so much every day. Suddenly like two days ago he started smiling. For real smiling.”
Zeke’s voice is reverent, “It’s beyond amazing.” His eyes look a little wetter than normal when he looks at Amelia, “You grew this little person. It still kind of blows my min
d.”
Amelia smiles, “It blows mine too. He has been such a good baby, but I kind of miss being pregnant and knowing that he was safe all the time.”
I nod, “I bet going back to work has been hard.”
Amelia sighs, “Yeah, it has been. I was considering putting in my notice and just helping you guys at the shop when I could while I’m home with Ridge, but then the owners approached me about a new opportunity.”
Beckett gives Amelia a little squeeze and his brows knit together, “What opportunity?”
I share a surprised look with Zeke; they share everything. Amelia bites her lip and looks up at Beckett sheepishly. “Well, they just talked to me yesterday and I was still letting it process, I guess. It would be a mostly remote position. They’re about to open their third location and have a fourth already scouted so I’d work kind of like a district manager and I’d oversee all the stores with their ordering and making sure the management teams are doing what they’re supposed to be doing. I’d have to travel to the other stores at least once every two weeks.”
A huge grin spreads across Beckett’s face as one of relief graces Amelia’s face. He kisses her temple, “That’s great, Baby.”
She kisses the underside of his jaw, “I haven’t accepted it yet, we’ll talk more about it later and decide if that’s what would be best for us.” She looks at Zeke holding Ridge, “All of us.” Her smile turns soft when she realizes that Ridge has fallen asleep in Zeke’s arms. “Do you want the sling, baby whisperer?”
I giggle because the name is fitting. Zeke might not look like the softest soul when you first meet him, but he is; Ridge recognized it instantly. At the last gathering we had, which was at Troy and Walsh’s house, Ridge was crying uncontrollably. Nothing Amelia or Beckett was trying helped at all. They changed his diapers, changed his clothes, tried to distract him, rock him and sing to him. Zeke held his arms out for Ridge and Amelia deposited him in Zeke’s arms, though she looked a little wary.
I could see the exhaustion in her eyes and she said that he’d been crying a lot over the last few days; more than he had been but the pediatrician told them that it was normal. Once Ridge was in Zeke’s arms, he calmed right down and feel asleep nestled against his chest. I can relate, it’s a very comfortable place to fall asleep.
Zeke smiles, “The sling doesn’t get him close enough. We’re good for now.” He rubs Ridge’s back up and down and I see a smile form on his little adorable baby face, even in his sleep.
Amelia stage whispers, “Did your ovaries just explode?”
I throw my head back and laugh. “Maybe,” I respond with a sly smile. Zeke gives me a wink.
Amelia tells Zeke, “When you want to, you can put him down in his crib. You know where everything is.”
Beckett whispers something in her ear and Amelia blushes. She bites her lip and shakes her head in admonishment. “I told you, we can start trying for a second one after you finish my tattoo.”
Beckett kisses her shoulder, “I moved some things around, so I have all day Sunday.”
Amelia furrows her brow, “This Sunday?” Beckett nods, “Did you figure out a babysitter?”
Beckett opens his mouth, closes it and then opens it again, “Um…”
Before Beckett can finish, I let them know, “I’m off Sunday, I’d be happy to hang with Ridge for the day.”
Beckett gives me a grateful smile, “Are you sure?” I grin and nod because I love spending time with Ridge. He’s pretty low maintenance compared to the other boys in our family. Beckett lets out a relieved breath, “Thanks, Liv.”
As everyone else arrives, Zeke disappears down the hallway to put Ridge down so he can get a little nap in before he’s passed from person to person. Ridge never seems to mind and I’m sure everyone is going to be enthralled with his smiles.
I head down the hallway but take a moment and look at the painting I gave them of their wedding proposal. It might not have been the most traditional baby shower gift, but Amelia’s eyes filled with tears and her voice was full of awe when she asked me if I painted it. It makes me proud as hell that they’ve put it up in a place of pride in their home, right next to a print of the painting that they got engaged in front of.
I lean against the doorframe of the nursery and watch Zeke gently pat Ridge’s back. He has a soft smile on his face. I can see the longing there; he wants a little one of his own. I want to give him that. When we first got together, we weren’t ready for the next step, but now I think we are. I have to admit that I’d like to get married first, but if that’s not the order things happen in than I’m okay with that too. I know we’re committed to each other.
Zeke glances over at me and his smile grows, “Hey, little fairy.”
“Hey, Babe.” He moves to grab the monitor off the dresser, and I nod my chin toward Ridge, “You want a little one, don’t you?”
A huge smile spreads across his face, “A little bit of you and a little bit of me in an adorable package? Yeah, I want that.”
Zeke wraps me up in his arms and walks me backwards out of the room and closes the door behind him. I smile up at him and whisper, “I want that too.”
He studies my face, “Do you think you’re ready? That we’re ready for that?”
I nod slowly, “I do. We have so much family around us that would help us and support us. I still have like two months left on this shot, so we don’t have to make any decisions right this moment.”
He wags his eyebrows at me, “Two months and then I’m knocking you up.”
I laugh, “You aren’t going to start referring to your little swimmers as super sperm if I get pregnant immediately like Banks does, are you?”
He chuckles, ‘Oh yeah, little fairy, I totally am.” He gives me a wicked smile, “Two months and then my super sperm is coming for ya.”
I shake my head and he kisses me hard. His tongue plunges into my mouth and I cling to his shoulders as he pulls our bodies flush together. He murmurs against my lips, “I love you, Livy.”
I melt in his arms, “I love you too, Zeke.” He takes a deep breath and I pull back to look at him. His face is serious, and I can see the worry in his eyes. “What’s wrong, Babe?”
He shakes his head and takes my hand. He pulls me along behind him as he heads outside to the back porch. Walsh, Troy and Bailey, who are talking in the kitchen, follow us out. Zeke nods toward Beckett who gets a sly grin on his face. I roll my eyes and look out at everyone in the yard. The guys from SO are throwing a football for Zeke’s brothers. Nate is chatting with Brian and Carolyn. The guys from HS are drinking beers around the patio table with Dex and Sam.
Beckett raises his voice, “Hey everyone!” Everyone starts to move toward the porch and gather around. “I just wanted to say thank you for coming to celebrate the day my beautiful wife came into my life.” He pulls Amelia to him and wraps his arm around her shoulders, she leans against him and smiles up at him with her eyes full of love. “This last year has had more ups than downs and I wouldn’t trade Amelia or any of our new family members for anything. The day I met Amelia was the best day of my life,” he chuckles, “even if I did mess it all up at first.”
Amelia kisses the underside of his jaw, “Water under the bridge.”
Beckett kisses Amelia’s temple. “Still, it’s important for people to right their wrongs and I’m not the only one who has done that this last year.” Beckett smiles at Zeke and then at his parents. “Family is so important, it keeps us going and it picks us up when we need it, it celebrates our best days and comforts us on our worst days. Thank you all for being my family and thank you for being here to celebrate this day with us.”
Zeke clears his throat and Beckett gives him a nod and a knowing smile. I whisper, “Why is he smiling at you like that?”
Zeke grins down at me and turns me so that I’m facing him. “My little fairy, I love you so much. I may have missed the day Amelia walked into the shop, but the next day I remember sitting in my car and thinking about everyth
ing I was missing out on in my life. I didn’t know then how to put my past behind me so that I could move forward and be the man you deserved in your life.”
I give him a warm smile, “You were always the man I deserved in my life.”
Zeke kisses my forehead, “I know you think that and that’s part of why I love you so much. I wasn’t worthy of you because I was in so much pain and I had so much guilt and shame. My heart kept trying to tell me that I needed you, that you were my missing piece, but my head couldn’t put my past to rest.”
Zeke pulls something out of his pocket and slowly sinks down to one knee, “I love you so much, Olivia. I am forever grateful that you waited for me to be ready and didn’t give up on me. I valued your friendship for so long and I was selfish because I knew I couldn’t let you go. I value your trust and your belief in me and that gave me the courage to let you into my past and that helped me heal more than I thought that I could. Then you stood by me and gave me strength as I started to heal my relationship with my parents and my past. Now, I know that I’m the man you need me to be.” He holds up a ring in his fingers and I feel tears start to trail down my cheeks. “Olivia, will you marry me and be my wife?”
I start nodding my head slowly and it takes me a moment to realize that I’m not saying anything. I shout, “Yes!” Zeke exhales a breath I didn’t realize he was holding.
Zeke smiles up at me and slips the ring on my finger before he stands up and wraps me up in his arms and kisses me hard. He deepens the kiss and splays his hand open on the small of my back, pressing me against his body. Cheering erupts around us and I can’t help the laugh that bubbles up. This man.