I think also that you are not so terrible at this thing you have decided to do with your life, Hanaan. Perhaps the next time we meet, I will tell you a few more stories. The “bride in the tree” tale is one that everyone knows, but it is not the most interesting, by far.
Do you know that Hameed never married? He was too scared to have his mother arrange another marriage after my little stunt, and too timid to look for his own wife. I found him on Facebook. He still has all his hair and he lives alone in Mumbai. I might pay him a visit on my way back home. I hope he doesn’t have a heart attack when he recognizes me.
Khuda hafiz, my love,
Kawkab Khala
The room still smelled like her—a mixture of Yardley English Rose powder and the musky Chanel perfume that would have overpowered a lesser personality. I folded the letter and put it in the pocket of my jeans. Then I carefully closed the door to keep her scent inside the room a little longer, and went downstairs to sleep on the couch.
CHAPTER FIFTY-TWO
Aydin knocked on the door of Three Sisters two days later, while I was cleaning in preparation for the renovations slated to begin in a few days. I nearly dropped the rag in my hand when I spotted him.
His hair wasn’t neatly combed and his face seemed harder somehow. But when he caught my eye through the glass, his shoulders dropped and he leaned against the door. Please? he mouthed, motioning. As if there had been any doubt.
When I let him inside, he handed me a bouquet of bright yellow daisies. Our eyes tangled, his gaze hot on my face.
Taking a deep breath, I said, “I should be giving you flowers. I’m so sorry. I should have told you about your mother right away, as soon as I figured it out. I didn’t know what to do, I didn’t think it was my place, and your father . . .” I trailed off. I wasn’t sure if he knew that Junaid Uncle had tried to buy my silence, or if it even mattered anymore. “I’m sorry for the way things ended between us at the festival.”
Aydin removed the bouquet from my hands. “Things haven’t ended between us,” he said. “They’ve barely begun. Why do you think I’m here?” He smiled, and I recognized forgiveness and a delicate tenderness in his eyes. It made me want to put my arms around him and cry. Or laugh. Maybe both.
“I did put your mom out of business,” he added.
He hadn’t heard. “Mom has sold the restaurant to Rashid. He’s shutting down to do some renovations and upgrades. A coat of paint, maybe some tablecloths, and bigger, brighter lights to perk up the place,” I said, echoing his suggestions from long ago. “Three Sisters should be open again in a month.”
A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. “Machiavelli will be my competition?”
“I should warn you, Rashid plays dirty. He’s hired Zulfa to manage his publicity campaign.”
Aydin threw back his head and laughed out loud. My heart lifted. I wanted to hold on to that joyful laughter. I wanted to bottle the sound and play it back on demand. I wanted to listen to him laugh for the rest of my life.
Now he leaned in close. “I knew I wanted you from the very beginning. From the moment we first met, I was intrigued, and then I was fascinated, and then I was in love. I just needed to figure out some things first. Hana, Anony-Ana, are you ready for this?”
He was teasing and he was serious. I knew him well enough to understand what he was really asking. Was I ready to stop playing games and let this beautiful untested thing between us unspool?
His eyes darkened as he looked at me, and I flushed. Yes. Yes, I was ready.
“Nice to meet you, Aydin,” I said. “My name is Hanaan Khan. I’m the daughter of Ghufran and Ijaz Khan, sister to a soccer star, niece to a warrior queen, cousin to Machiavelli. I am a wielder of microphones and slinger of stories. It’s been a rough few months but I’m ready to face whatever comes next, together. What about you?”
“Yes,” he said simply. “For as long as we both shall live, my answer to that question will always be . . . yes.”
[Transcript]
Here are the rules:
This is no longer a single-person podcast. That means there might be interviews, a cohost, and possibly, if I’m feeling up to it, some comedy.
Also, this whole anonymous thing isn’t working for me anymore. So, listeners, here we go.
My name isn’t Ana; it’s Hana Khan. I’m twenty-four years old and I live in Scarborough, an east-end suburb of Toronto, Canada. My parents immigrated from India before I was born, and until recently we ran a small halal restaurant called Three Sisters Biryani Poutine. My mom let me name the place when I was nine years old, because she didn’t care about things like market research or worry about confusing her customers. My cousin Rashid runs the restaurant now, and you should check it out. The food is great, and it’s definitely not a front for the New Delhi Mafia.
The other halal restaurant on our street is Wholistic Burgers and Grill. It’s owned and run by my husband, Aydin Shah. We first met because of this podcast. Later he tried to shut down Three Sisters, and then I tried to shut down his restaurant. After a few months we decided it would be better if we got married instead, since it was obvious he was madly in love with me. We plan to live mostly happily ever after, which is the best anyone can hope for in this life, according to my cousin.
When I started this podcast a year ago, I promised nothing of substance and nothing but the truth. This is my truth:
The first law of thermodynamics states that energy is neither created nor destroyed, but it can be transformed from one form to another. That law will get you every time, so make sure the energy you put out into the world is positive. Otherwise it will turn the other way and then turn on you.
Newton’s third law of motion states that every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Everything that happened to me this year has been proof, whether I wanted it to be or not. Luckily, the hatred aimed at me and mine was met with an equal and transformative amount of love.
Rashid’s Second Law of Enthusiastic Fresh Starts is to build a dam—and then a hydroelectric power station right beside it to make money while your world is changing.
Kawkab Khala’s Eternal Law of “Stop Being Ridiculous, Hana Jaan,” is to dress with intention, keep tabs on your enemies, and always take care of your friends. Also, intelligent women play the long game.
Aydin’s Law of Final Words is to accept that crazy coincidences really do happen in real life, and that love keeps to its own schedule.
And finally, Hana’s First Law of Living states that everything is better told as a story, and mine is still unfolding. I hope you tune in again soon for all the adventures that await.
Acknowledgments
Bismillah. I feel nervous and a little shocked to be writing the acknowledgments for my second novel already. While Hana Khan Carries On didn’t take as long to write as my first book, Ayesha at Last, it was just as difficult. Writing is a lonely occupation for the most part, but it would have been impossible without my community:
Many thanks to my wonderful agent, Ann Collette. Your advice is spot-on and your support unflagging. The way we met is a meet-cute of its own. Huge thanks also for steering me away from that particular plotline we’ll never talk about again!
Thanks also to my amazing editor, Jennifer Lambert at HarperCollins Canada. Your wisdom and insights always blow me away. Thank you for believing in Hana Khan and for encouraging me to dig deeper, to the heart of this story. I wouldn’t have arrived here without you!
So much thanks to the stellar team at HarperCollins Canada for hyping my writing on the socials and for supporting my funny Muslim rom-com in every way. I am thrilled to be part of the family.
To my #SisterhoodOfThePen, the talented writers Sajidah (S. K. Ali) and Ausma Zehanat Khan, thank you for reading my earlier drafts, offering honest feedback, and cheering me on. I couldn’t do this without the support of our “staff ro
om.” #BlahBlahPlot forever!
Thank you to my first readers, Aminah and Nina. Your suggestions are always excellent, and I live for your unfiltered reactions.
Many thanks to Radiyah Chowdhury, Shireen Ahmed, and Aaron Reynolds for answering my many questions about the world of radio and podcasting. Thanks also to Fasiha Khan for talking to me about family law. Any mistakes are mine entirely.
Heart emojis to my #Robarts friends: I’ve known most of you since I was a kid obsessed with books. Thanks for being my people.
Many thanks to my parents, Mohammed and Azmat Jalaluddin, and the rest of my family in Toronto and around the world. Your absolute delight at having a writer in the family has meant the world.
For my sons, Mustafa and Ibrahim: Your continued indifference to my writing career is a great reminder of what is truly important in life. I am so proud of the compassionate and kind people you are growing into. Sorry for being such a distracted mom.
For my husband, Imtiaz: None of this would have been possible without your help, love, advice, and cheerleading. You read every draft I write and tell me what you truly think. You listen to my complaints, put up with my distracted musings, and support every dream. I’m not sure how I got so lucky. Thank you.
And finally, a big shout-out to you, reader. This book wouldn’t exist without you! I hope you enjoyed Hana Khan Carries On, and if you did, please spread the word and consider reviewing on the platform of your choice—it really helps.
READERS GUIDE
Hana Khan
CARRIES ON
UZMA JALALUDDIN
Discussion Questions
Hana hosts her podcast anonymously and chats with her number one fan under their online pseudonyms. What is it about hidden identities online that seems to free people to reveal themselves? Discuss how this can manifest in both positive and negative ways.
Hana believes that the survival of her family business hinges on removing the competition of Wholistic Burgers and Grill in the Golden Crescent. She then makes a choice to discredit Wholistic Grill by creating a fake social media account and posting false complaints and safety concerns. Do you think the end justify the means in this case? At what point do individual needs for survival and economic livelihood justify morally poor choices? Do they ever?
The downtown Toronto attack sets off a series of outcomes after video of the incident is uploaded online. Rashid justifies his actions as necessary justice, while Hana fears the repercussions of posting this incident to the world. Discuss the role of video footage in the novel. Does broadcasting hate incidents help or polarize?
Hana deals with various microaggressions from her boss, Marisa, at the radio station, and from a long-ago interaction with her teacher Mr. Nielson. Even Rashid faces a subtle othering when the well-intentioned Yusuf assumes he can’t speak English. Contrast the impact of these more low-key incidents with the overt racist attacks. Is one more traumatic than the other?
Co-intern Thomas Matthews is a fellow South Asian coworker content to participate in damaging tropes about different communities to achieve his own career goals. How important is it for allies to speak up when they witness harmful behavior? Did Hana forgive Thomas too easily? In your own life, where do you catch yourself making assumptions and generalizations about communities other than your own?
What does Hana take away from Kawkab Khala’s story, and how does her “alleged aunt” inspire her own life choices? Have you been similarly inspired by a family story?
Hana creates a podcast about the experience of growing up as the daughter of Indian immigrants—there is a sense of freedom to it, and yet also a sense of having shallow roots. Discuss the podcast and how both things can be true. How does this relate to the book’s themes about family stories?
Hana and Aydin have a complicated relationship throughout the novel. Contrast their relationship online with their real-world interactions. The story ends on a positive note—what qualities kept them returning to each other, despite everything? What challenges and triumphs do you see in their future together?
Hana makes a decision regarding her internship toward the end of the novel. Have you ever been put into a similar situation? Should Hana have chosen a different outcome? How can real change and increased diversity be implemented in the workplace?
Junaid’s secret leads to a traumatic fallout for his family. How is he motivated by a flawed understanding and fear of mental health challenges? Discuss how cultural attitudes toward mental health issues can sometimes prevent people from seeking help.
There are various paths to romantic love in Hana Khan Carries On: Kawkab Khala bravely forges her own path; Rashid is a hopeless romantic; Hana’s parents had a traditional arranged marriage; Fazeela and Fahim met in school; Lily and Yusuf were childhood friends; Hana and Aydin’s romantic relationship began online. How does the novel explore the diversity of love, even within diverse communities?
At the end of the novel, the street festival nearly ends in a frightening riot, but Aydin and the Desi Beat performers manage to diffuse a tense situation. How did this final moment in the novel resonate with your own experiences dealing with charged situations? Is humor an effective strategy to fight back against hatred?
Andrea Stenson
Uzma Jalaluddin is the author of Ayesha at Last and Hana Khan Carries On. A high school teacher, she is also a Toronto Star columnist and a contributor to the Atlantic. Her first novel was optioned for film by Pascal Pictures. She lives in Toronto with her family.
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