“That you were looking for a place to pee.”
“Ah.” Adeline nodded, and then laughed, her cheeks flushing for no good reason. “That’s a reasonable assumption. But since public urination can get you arrested in a lot of places, and I wasn’t sure of your local laws on that matter, I came up with the GPS excuse in case someone questioned me or –”
“Or you fell through the floor while attempting to rescue a puppy.”
“Yeah. That was… inconvenient.” She shrugged, feeling her blush heat another degree. “I thought you were the sheriff – I mean, you were wearing the hat. And I didn’t want to go to jail.”
Sutton’s mouth stretched into an appreciative smile. “You’re a little devious.”
“I don’t think that qualifies as devious, exactly.”
“Oh, I think it does. And I like it. It makes me feel much better about doing this.”
He signaled his intention by shifting his gaze to her mouth, giving Adeline a chance to throw up a hand or move away or otherwise object if she weren’t interested.
But she was interested. Very. So much so that when his hand came to rest on the small of her back, his head dipping toward hers, she rose up onto her toes to meet him.
His breath was warm, and tinged with a hint of whiskey. His smell, his taste, or maybe some heady combination of the two, saturated her senses. Intoxicated, Adeline swayed closer, her breasts pressing against hard muscle, and the hand resting on her back clenched into a fist. She felt the hum of pleasure vibrate in her throat before the kiss… exploded. There was really no other word.
His hand slid down to cup her butt, and she stretched higher, instinctively pressing against the hardness behind the button fly of his jeans. She lifted one leg, wrapping it around his, and made a sound that might have been embarrassing if she had even half her wits about her. Desire crashed through her in a thundering wave, the rush of her blood so hot that her skin began to tingle. Unable to catch her breath, Adeline pushed against Sutton’s chest, stumbling backward because their legs were still tangled.
He once again caught her arm, but then immediately let go. Watching her as if she were a skittish mare who might bolt at any second, Sutton lifted his palms in the air. “I’m sorry. I hope I didn’t –”
“No.” Adeline shook her head, and then clutched it between her hands as if she could physically stop it from swimming. “No. I just…” Running out of the ability to form words, or even coherent thoughts, she shifted her fingertips to her lips and waited for her brain to come back online. “Holy shit.”
He looked at her with consternation. “Was that a good holy shit or a –”
“Good,” she interrupted. “Really… good.”
“Whew.” He placed a hand over his chest. “I’m not always the most emotionally perceptive guy, but I didn’t think I was reading things that wrong.”
“No.” Holy, holy shit. “You weren’t.”
Because Adeline was afraid that she might climb back up him like some sort of vine, she turned and picked up the pizza, holding it between them. It seemed best to have a barrier. Possibly a fence.
“I have plates,” she managed to say, studiously averting her gaze from the area between his chest and his knees. “In the kitchen.” As if that were breaking news.
“Plates would be useful.”
“And napkins.”
Sutton nodded as if she weren’t making imbecilic comments. “Napkins are good.”
Trying not to cringe, Adeline headed toward the kitchen, which suddenly seemed very small. Or maybe Sutton seemed large. Jesus. He sure did. Either way, there appeared to be a lot less air in the cabin than she needed to be able to breathe.
She set the pizza on the table and wondered when she’d become a walking hormone. “There are, um, drinks in the fridge. You’re welcome to help yourself.”
“Can I get you anything?”
She was developing a mental list. “Just water,” she said, clearing her throat and hopefully her head. “Thank you.”
But when she went to get the plates from the cabinet, she remembered that she couldn’t lift her left arm above a ninety-degree angle, and she didn’t trust herself not to drop them if she tried it one-handed.
“I’m on it,” Sutton said, easily reaching over her head. The heat of his body behind hers caused her breath to hitch as chill bumps raced across her skin.
Adeline braced her hands on the edge of the counter.
“I don’t want to sound like a broken record. But are you okay?”
“Yes.” No. “Maybe.”
He set the plates down on the counter, and then leaned back against it himself. “Would it be better if I left?”
“No.” Jesus, she was really messing this up. “Please.” Drawing a breath, she forced herself to meet his concerned gaze. “There are… extenuating circumstances for why I’m… well quite frankly, acting so weird. Weird,” she repeated, when he looked like he was going to protest. “You don’t have to be polite.”
“Is there something I can do – or not do – to make it better?”
The fact that he would offer was… really damn attractive.
“I don’t know,” she said honestly. “It’s never really happened quite this way before. And I can’t really be sure that it is… it, because it’s tangled with...” an overwhelming sexual attraction “other stuff.”
Rather than questioning her nonsensical statement, Sutton picked up the plates. “Okay. How about we get some food in you, and then you can tell me. If you feel like telling me, that is.”
The relief that washed through her was almost as potent as the desire. “That would be great.”
While Sutton moved away to set out the plates, Adeline filled two glasses with ice.
And then realized that she was suddenly freezing.
Glancing up, Sutton saw her shiver. “Let me get the stove going.”
“Oh. You don’t have to do that. The pizza will get cold.”
“I’m pretty sure it’s already cold, which is my fault. I, uh, saw you sleeping through the window when I came onto the porch the first time, so I went ahead and chopped some kindling. I didn’t want to wake you up.”
Which was considerate, and also alarming. Because not only hadn’t she heard him outside, but apparently the door had been open.
Anyone could have walked in.
“I’ll go grab some wood.”
Sutton walked out, and Adeline watched him go before turning on the oven. Focusing on the very basic task of heating the pizza gave the fog clouding her mind some time to dissipate. Maybe it was the caffeine she’d accidentally ingested today, or the unexpectedly long nap, but she felt as if she were underwater, everything magnified and yet distorted.
Or maybe it was just Sutton.
She’d had lovers before, and experienced physical arousal any number of times. But it had never been quite that immediate, or that potent. And potent physical reactions scared her, especially when they weren’t easily identified.
Feeling like a freak, Adeline glanced through the kitchen window, into the darkness she hadn’t witnessed falling. Beyond the trees, she could just make out a hint of moonlight glinting off the lake. The sight, so otherwise foreign, calmed her in a way that spoke to the familiar. Maybe because she’d been here years before, or maybe it was something less definable. An echo of her mother’s blood.
The thought made her unexpectedly emotional.
“You must have been tired,” Sutton said, startling her again. She hadn’t heard him come back inside, but here he was with a load of wood in his arms. “You were out cold,” he added, before starting to build the fire.
Adeline tapped her left ear. “I don’t hear much if I’m sleeping on my right side. But yes. I was tired. They, um, must have given me caffeinated coffee this morning at Clancy’s, and I have a sensitivity. I get a really frenetic high, and then comes the headache and the inevitable crash. I… used to have seizures, and although I haven’t had one for quite a while
, I’m still cautious about certain triggers. Caffeine can be one.”
Sutton sat frozen, hand on the open stove door. “You ordered decaffeinated. I heard you.”
“Right.” She lifted a shoulder in a half shrug. “It happens sometimes, especially when places are busy. I should have double checked when he brought it over, but I was… flustered.”
His eyes scanned her face. “Because of me.”
“Well, and the unexpected arrival of your high school girlfriend on the scene. But… yes.”
He stacked wood inside the stove. “I’m sorry you were uncomfortable. About Shannon, anyway. Although truth be told, I don’t think any one of the three of us would sign up to do that again. It was awkward all the way around.”
Lighting the crumpled paper, he waited for it to catch before closing the door, wiping his hands on his jeans.
And then he stood up to face her. “I can’t be sorry that I fluster you, though. You do the same to me.”
Adeline laughed, a sound caught between nerves and disbelief. “Right.”
Before he could respond, the buzzer on the ancient oven began to go off. Adeline grabbed an oven mitt and then opened the door to check the pizza. “This thing heats up quickly, I’ll give it that.”
“My parents have an extra refrigerator in their garage that’s from the early seventies, and the thing runs better than their brand new one half the time. They built stuff to last back then,”
“So my grandpa always used to say.”
“Is this the grandpa that owned the inn?”
“And this place, yes. And as you can see, there weren’t a lot of changes made from the time that his dad built it. As a whole, the men on that side of my family tend to be pretty set in their ways. Umm, should I serve you or…”
“That would be great.”
After she filled both their plates, they sat at the table. To his credit, Sutton kept the conversational ball rolling, describing his earlier meeting with the group of women he was leading on a hike over the weekend.
“So, you’re telling me you’re an outdoor guide, too?”
“No.” Chuckling, he shook his head. “Absolutely not. What I am is familiar with that particular trail, as it was a family tradition to hike it most summers when we were kids. My grandfather – my mom’s dad – was a park ranger for Chattahoochee and Oconee National Forests, so we spent a lot of time outdoors. As a consequence, I’m well-acquainted with the local flora and fauna, and know what to watch out for. I’m also a certified EMT in case something goes awry.” He knocked on the wood table. “But most importantly, I got sucked into this because I’m a pushover for my baby sister.”
Adeline managed a smile, and even asked a follow-up question about his sister’s business, which she’d passed by when she was in town. But she only half heard the answer. Pushover for my baby sister. It was an innocuous enough phrase, but it caused her mind to wander again, rewinding like a well-worn tape. She ate the pizza without tasting it, trying to pretend that everything was normal.
“I was struck by lightning,” she blurted.
Sutton lowered the slice of pizza that had been halfway to his mouth. “Metaphorically or…”
Adeline yanked down the neck of her sweater, exposing her left shoulder.
Sutton’s gaze drifted toward the bare skin, and Adeline angled so that the back of her shoulder was toward him. Her hands clenched into fists, and she focused on the rough wooden wall while she waited for him to speak.
“You’re pretty bruised up.”
“That’s not what –”
“I know it’s not what you wanted to show me. But I think you’ve been downplaying your injury, nonetheless. I can only assume it’s because you didn’t want me – or anyone, I guess – to ask about your Lichtenberg scar.”
Her head whipped around in surprise. “You’ve heard of them?”
“I lived in Florida for over a decade,” he said. “Lightning strike capital of the world. Yeah, I’ve heard of them. But I’ve never met anyone who’s been hit.”
“Well,” she said, her tone shorter than she’d intended. “Now you have.”
Sutton rubbed the stubble on his cheek, and then picked up his pizza. “Okay.”
Okay? Adeline turned back around in her chair. “You don’t have questions?”
“Of course I have questions. I’m a trained scientific researcher, for God’s sake. But I’m also a man who recognizes when a woman is itching for a fight.”
Adeline gasped, affronted. Sutton chewed, ignoring her, which irritated her even more.
“I’m not itching for a fight.”
“Okay.”
“Stop saying that.”
Sutton watched her over the top of his glass as he took a drink of water. “Are you waiting for me to make you feel like some sort of microscope slide to be analyzed and examined? Because I’m not going to do that.”
His words acted as a release valve on the head of steam she’d been building. Left with nothing to vent, Adeline pulled her sleeve back up. “People have.”
“I can imagine. I’m not sure why you assumed I would be one of them.”
Because her dad had, she realized. And Sutton, in a couple of ways, reminded her of her father. It was a sobering thing to admit.
Her dad hadn’t made her feel that way intentionally, of course. He’d loved her, and done his best to understand and support her. But he’d tried so hard at first to make sense of the changes she’d undergone, both physically and mentally, that sometimes she’d felt more like a lab rat than his daughter.
The thought felt so disloyal that Adeline wanted to cry.
“I had a lot of doctors… and researchers… studying me afterwards.”
“How old were you?”
“Seven.”
He set down his glass and gave her his full attention.
“I was at the beach,” she continued. “With my mom and my little sister. My dad was at work. My mom told me it was time to go, because she could see the clouds building, but I was in the middle of making a sandcastle and kept pretending like I didn’t hear her. There was nothing wrong with my hearing then. I don’t remember how it happened, because my short-term memory surrounding the incident was…” she made a gesture with her hand “pretty much wiped out. In fact, it can still be spotty. But there were witnesses, other beachgoers. I guess she picked up my little sister – Jacey. She was two. Anyway, mom picked her up and started toward me, and then… they never knew what hit them. None of us did. But somehow, I survived and they didn’t.”
Sutton’s eyes scanned her face. “I hate that the only thing I can think of to say right now is I’m sorry. That had to have been devastating.”
Devastation? Yes, that was an adequate word to describe the rubble to which her life had been reduced. “It was hard.”
She didn’t need to spell out that that was an understatement.
“I don’t want to make assumptions, but you said something about seizures. Were those a result of being hit?”
“Seizures, my hearing loss, the balance problems that I mentioned. My body builds up a high static charge much more easily now, so I have to be careful plugging things in – or touching kind strangers who give up their morning to help my trespassing self out of a hole in the floor.”
Understanding lit his eyes. “I thought that was my fault.”
“And I allowed you to think it. It happens often enough that some of the kids I went to school with took to calling me Sparky.”
“Kids are assholes.”
“You’re telling me. Sometimes my proximity will even make electronics go wonky. That, I actually used to use to my advantage. If my classmates got too annoying, I’d threaten to come to their house and fry their TVs.”
“Good for you. Standing up to bullies is pretty much the only way to get them to stop.”
She smiled, but it faded quickly. “I had an arrythmia for a while, but it eventually normalized. Cardiac arrest is common in strike victims, and the
respiratory center of the brain stem can be paralyzed, meaning people literally forget to breathe. Those are the two main causes of fatalities. But oddly, and maybe you’re aware of this fact, most people who are struck by lightning survive.”
He studied her a moment. “At what cost?”
Adeline released the breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. He gets it. So many people over the years had asked if she felt like the luckiest person alive, or cracked jokes about her being superhuman. In high school some kids even tried to get her to go outside during a storm, like some kind of human lightning rod. And while Adeline realized that she was fortunate, the… minimization of what she’d been through still rankled. She hated feeling like a freak, which was why she kept her scar covered most of the time, and got touchy when discussing it. However, her entire life, including her own body, had been irreparably altered. She was entitled to be touchy.
“I had to relearn how to speak,” she said. “When I tried at first, the words came out jumbled, so for a while I stopped trying at all. Then that became a battle with both my dad and my therapist, while they argued as to whether my mutism was selective or involuntary. Was I just being difficult, or had I physically lost the ability to talk.”
“Sounds like it was a little of both?”
A half-smile lifted one corner of her mouth. “A fair assessment. I was… angry. Almost as angry as I was grief-stricken and scared. I was seven years old, and my entire world had just been turned upside down. That bolt of electricity essentially rewired my brain, and a lot of things went haywire. I suffered from insomnia, anxiety, depression. Nightmares and PTSD. When I did start talking again, it was with a faulty social filter, which caused a lot of embarrassment for both my father and myself. I’m not a natural introvert, but it took ages for me to feel comfortable around other people. Those mental after-effects are mostly a thing of the past, with a few notable exceptions, although my dad’s death six months ago caused some of them to return.”
“Well Jesus,” Sutton said. “I guess so.”
Adeline hesitated. She’d told him more than she told most people, and it would be perfectly reasonable to leave it at that. The mental health issues she’d been dealing with lately were enough of an excuse for why she’d acted oddly earlier.
Slow Burn (Rabun County Book 1) Page 13