by Eden Beck
“Thank you for having me,” I tell her happily. “Is there anything I can do to help you in here?” I ask, looking around to see what might need to be done.
Alice takes my hands in hers and looks at me seriously in my eyes. “Yes. Keep my boys out of the kitchen. Take them outside or something, but occupy them and get them all out of here so that I can cook this dinner without them getting into everything!”
“Awe, mom, getting into everything is the best part,” Charles coos at her with a hug as he walks by and grabs a handful of black olives.
“See?” she implores me desperately. “Get them out, please. I’ll give you the biggest piece of pie if you do.”
I laugh at her because she’s begging me and bartering with me, and I only just met her. “Okay. I’m on it. Stryker boy duty!”
Wills laughs and I turn to him and his brothers. “Snowmen and then a snowball fight. Who’s in?”
They’re all in, and they practically tumble over each other heading for the door. Alice places her palms together in a sign of prayer and thanks as she grins at me and gets back to work. I spend the next two hours out in the cold with the boys, all of us having the time of our lives.
It’s been a while since I’ve been around any younger kids. Not since the foster home. I didn’t realize it until now, but I missed it.
When they’re finally a little worn out and there’s talk of video games and hot cocoa, I head inside and go upstairs to my room to unpack. It’s a beautiful room with a big bathroom, and a big king-sized bed. It’s not as hotel-esque as the Rashnikov cabin, but it’s not a bad thing. Here, I’m not afraid to mess up the sheets or trip over fancy stairs leading up to the bed. It’s homey.
I could curl up here with a good TV show and not come out for weeks.
I put my clothes away in the dresser and organize the gifts I brought. I’m just finishing that up when Wills sneaks in and closes the door behind him. I turn to him and he takes me in his arms, looking as happy as I feel.
“I needed so badly to be with you. It just wasn’t right without you,” I tell him as he leans in close to kiss me.
“I know exactly what you mean,” he answers, his hands moving over me as his mouth leaves mine and travels down my neck.
“Wills! We can’t do this yet, we have to go downstairs. Your brothers will-” But he stops me.
“My brothers are in the middle of a video game, my mother is cooking, and my father is out in the garage hiding from everyone and doing some mysterious Christmas thing. So there’s nothing that you and I have to go do right now, which means that we can take a little time and do some of this.”
He slowly pulls my sweater off of me, followed by the rest of my clothes as he lays me back in the bed and I lose myself completely in him. This will be one of the best holidays ever.
Chapter 9
We eat a magnificent dinner, and afterward we all open gifts. Once Wills heard I was coming, they all waited for me so I could be included.
It’s so sweet, it makes my heart melt.
Wills got me a beautiful necklace with a diamond heart on it, and I give him a new waterproof watch to wear while swimming. It cost a good chunk of the money Dane gave me, but really, I’ve lived this long without expenses … I can wait a couple weeks doing the same,
The gifts I picked up for his brothers and parents are warmly and happily received. I’m spoiled by them as well, which was very kind of them, especially considering I didn’t know if I was coming. Wills tells me in my ear that he told them I would come for sure; it was never a question.
We sit together, all of us curled up on sofas and chairs, watching a couple of Christmas movies, and then we all head to bed. Wills joins me in my room after everyone is asleep, and he locks the door behind him and spends the night loving me and snuggling with me under the covers.
Blair comes the next night, and both he and Wills take turns spending each night after with me, as I’ve begun to have nightmares about the fire and the explosion. I keep seeing the injuries and deaths of those around me, especially Dana and my father. Lately, it’s my father a lot.
They’re so good to me, my boys, comforting me when I’m upset, and loving me with such passion and tenderness that there is no time when I don’t feel their all-encompassing love.
Blair, Wills, and the brothers and I are all out hiking through the woods behind the house, one day when I pause for a moment in my steps, gazing at them as they banter and talk. These two boys and myself are more a family than any I have ever been a part of.
Not only them, but their families as well.
Blair’s parents and Wills’ have taken me in as if I was one of their own; warm and welcoming, loving and accepting. Wills’ parents haven’t said anything about the fact that I’m dating both of them, and Blair’s father only mentioned it briefly in passing.
All of them are accepting of it, and of me, and it’s just what I have always hoped for. This feeling of love and inclusion, of being a part of something bigger than myself; a family where I belong, and where I am wanted. I have that with Wills and Blair. I’m so lucky to have that with them, and I know it.
Blair is with me later that night, and he showers with me, taking his time washing my hair and my body, kissing me and making love with me in the steamy water. I’m so breathless and filled with rapture. He makes the whole world disappear when I am in his arms. His silvery-white hair is wet and slicked back, and his mischievous green eyes are on fire with passion. It steals my heart away.
“Do you remember the first time …” I ask him after I’ve melted into his arms and he into mine, both of us having trembled with release.
“I will never forget the first time. It was our first time. It was your first time. It was so incredible. You were like a dream … so beautiful, so innocent, so unbelievable, sitting in that steamy water, covered in bubbles. It was one of the best days of my life,” he murmurs to me as he rinses me off tenderly.
“It was one of the best days of my life, too,” I say as we step out and he wraps me in a towel, drying me off. I reach for my pajamas, but he closes his hand over mine and shakes his head.
“You can wear me tonight,” he tells me sensually, and walks with me to the bed, where he pulls me up against him, and we talk and kiss and do just about everything except get any sleep until the wee hours.
The days at the Stryker house are filled with laughter and fun, with easiness and relaxation.
It’s just as good as Thanksgiving was at Blair’s, or perhaps a little better, since Victoria and Astor were there with us, and that made it awkward. Victoria had a miserable time and she refused to look at us, and Astor was so jealous that I was with Blair and Wills that he came to my room and kissed me, trying to get me to make love with him.
That memory brings me a pang of sadness and more than a little guilt, but I decide not to think about it. Astor may have hurt me, but this Christmas there is only love, no bitterness, and I am cherishing every single second of it. I want it to stay that way.
Our days here at the house are numbered. Soon, it’s the last full day I’ll spend with the Strykers, and I’m trying not to think about it.
Blair and I watch as Wills, his brothers, and his father all take each other on in a rousing game of football in the huge back yard. Blair isn’t into sports, but Wills breathes it like it’s oxygen. Blair keeps watching me as we sit there together and finally I turn to him and give him a curious look.
“What is it?” I ask interestedly.
He shakes his head. “I’m just thinking. I mean … it’s New Year’s Eve tomorrow, and that means that we only have five more months together at school before we graduate. After that, it’s off to college. When I woke up beside you this morning, all I could think was how much I love doing that, and how much I miss it when you’re not next to me. What are we going to do when we have to go our separate ways? How are we even going to do that? I can’t lose you!”
I take his face in my hands and look into his dazz
ling green eyes. “Don’t you worry about that right now. That’s ages away.”
I lean close and give him a long, slow kiss, and then I smile at him and take his hand in mine. He sighs and nods, and I know that he’s doing what I’m asking him to, but it’s a struggle for him. I know he’s going to keep worrying about the future, and there’s nothing I can do to stop that.
It’s later in the evening when Wills comes to me and I’m waiting for him. He undresses me slowly, taking his time and covering my skin with his mouth and his lips in every place where he pulls the material from me. It’s like a slow-moving fire, burning deeply into me and making me want more of it.
His big, strong hands move over my neck and my back, massaging me and working his fingers into my shoulders, all the way down to my hips, and over my legs.
Something about him seems a little off, however, and I stop him and sit up.
“What’s on your mind?” I ask, looking down at him lying in my lap.
He reaches out and plays with a strand of my hair. “I was thinking about what happened today when we were all playing football. I saw you and Blair talking, and it looked kind of serious. I was wondering what it was about, but I didn’t want to be nosy and ask. I mean, we kind of have this arrangement, and whatever is between you two is between the two of you. I was just hoping everything was okay.”
I smile at him gently. “Yeah, everything is okay. Blair was worried about what’s going to happen when we all graduate in May. He’s afraid that we’re going to go separate directions and that we won’t have this bond anymore … this arrangement, that we have. He doesn’t want to lose it.”
Wills frowns for a moment and looks at me. “I don’t want to lose it either,” he says quietly. “But it’s because I won’t lose you that I’m not worried about that. I’m going to do whatever it takes to keep you close to me. We’ll work that out when the time comes to handle it.”
I smile at him widely. “That’s what I told Blair. He’s still worried about it. We’ll sort it out when the time comes.”
Wills leans forward and kisses me. “Get some sleep. Sweet dreams.”
I nestle in against his neck and his chest and close my eyes.
If only that was up to me.
My thoughts drift from my boys to Astor, and then Victoria, and somewhere in my dreams I find myself back in the cellar, and it’s the night of the party. I feel panic in my chest, and I start looking for Dana. I can see other people around me, but their faces are masked. All except Victoria’s.
She’s around me, everywhere I look, in every direction. It’s like I can’t get away from her, and I can’t get past her to find Dana. I hear Dana screaming for me, but Victoria blocks me, and she keeps me there before her as she laughs at me, over and over, telling me that I’m the one who’s killing Dana.
I scream at her and try to lunge for her, but she keeps disappearing in the smoke. Then she reappears behind me, taunting me, challenging me, and I keep vowing to stop her, but I can’t. the whole time there are flames burning all around us as I hear people screaming in terror and pain.
I try to fight her, but I just can’t reach her, and everything in me feels like it’s straining under tremendous pressure. Something grabs me and pulls at me. I turn, but I can’t see anyone. It pulls me harder, and I can hear my name being called over and over. It’s another voice. A deeper voice. It’s Wills’ voice.
“Wills?” I call out to him, but I can’t see him. “Wills!” I cry out again, and I hear him again, so close to me.
“Wake up, baby. Wake up. It’s just a dream … I’m right here. Wake up!” he says, and I gasp and open my eyes. He’s there beside me, looking down at me as he leans on his elbow. He touches my cheek and leans toward me to kiss my forehead.
“Wake up. It’s only a dream,” he tells me again, and I draw in a deep breath and reach for him, holding him tightly.
“It was awful. It was the party … the explosion,” I say quietly. “Victoria was there, killing everyone, and I couldn’t stop her. I tried to, but I couldn’t. Oh Wills … it’s so awful!” I feel the tears come as they do every time I have another nightmare about that horrible evening, and he holds me close against him and strokes his fingers through my hair.
“It’s over. It’s all over. You’re safe, and Dana is safe. It’s going to be okay. Let the nightmares go. I’m here and nothing is going to happen to you.”
He kisses my forehead, and then my cheek, and then my mouth, and I reach for him and part his lips with mine, needing so much to feel him love me, and to make all of the pain and anger in me go away for a while. He moves above me, and I bring him into me and lose myself in him completely, letting go of everything but the overwhelming passion and love we create and share.
Chapter 10
New Year’s Eve comes, and I ring it in with my boys, kissing each of them at midnight, and we vow to each other that it’s going to be an amazing year. I vow to myself silently that I will get my revenge on Victoria, in any way I can.
Every time I think the trauma is slipping away, something brings the memory of it fresh to my mind. If it isn’t Victoria or Dana, it’s the dreams.
If I didn’t have the boys to comfort me, I don’t know what I’d do.
Even though they could stay with their families for a few more days before classes start, both Wills and Blair head up to the school with me the next day.
They continue to take turns staying the night in my room with me, to help stem the nightmares that come. That and, well, the other thing.
At least, until one night when the monitor bangs on my door and I’m forced to open it, and Blair is discovered. He’s taken from my room and sent back to his. As he’s going down the hallway reluctantly, I see Victoria standing not far away, with her arms crossed and a smug look on her face.
Anger and bitterness consume me, but this time, I don’t turn the other cheek. I’ve done enough of that.
As soon as the monitor leaves, I stalk down the hall in my negligee and shove a finger in her chest. “What in the hell are you doing?”
She shrugs and laughs lightly. “Oh nothing. I just thought I’d tip the monitor off that you’ve been basically running a whorehouse out of your dorm room. It’s against the rules, you know. Might get you kicked out of here.” She smirks at me menacingly.
“What I do in that room, and who I do it with is absolutely none of your business. Well … most of it isn’t your business. I suppose it might be your business that Astor was there.” I hadn’t decided whether or not to tell her, but seeing as she has just had my boy evicted from my room in the middle of the night, I decide that turnabout is fair play.
Victoria’s face turns ashen and her eyes grow wide. “He was not. You little liar!”
It’s my turn to smile smugly at her. “Am I a liar? Do you know where he was and what he was doing the night of the funerals here? Because I do. Sweet dreams, Vic.”
I turn on my heel and march back to my room feeling some glimmer of justice as I hear her freaking out behind me. She shrieks at the top of her lungs and stomps out of the hallway, going back to her own room.
I know I shouldn’t have said anything, but it serves her right for picking a fight with me tonight.
She had it coming, and I don’t mind doling it out to her. She’s got a hell of a lot more coming from me, but this is just a little taste of that. Revenge is going to be so sweet, and I can barely wait for it.
One week back into school, Dana returns and I could not be happier. She’s still recovering, and she’s still bandaged up in places and trying to take it easy, but she’s back, and I am thrilled. I hug her gently but tightly when she comes into the room, and her parents come in behind her, carrying all of her bags and extra things.
I’d gotten so used to sleeping with the boys that once they were gone, the dorm room felt emptier than ever. At least now, thought I might not have Wills or Blair, I will have someone to wake me from the nightmares.
As soon as her pare
nts leave, Dana looks at me in such relief and excitement. She gushes happily.
“Oh my god, I’m back! Finally! I can’t believe I’m back. I didn’t think I was ever going to get out of that damn hospital. I love my mom and dad so much, but I was so ready to be out of there.”
She shakes her head. “I never thought I could miss this place so much.”
“I’m really glad to have you back here too,” I tell her, just as happy to see her as she is to see me. “Were you really on your own the whole time?” I ask, looking at her sympathetically.
She blushes a little and smiles at me. “Well, actually no. You’ll never believe this, but Laura Brighton came to see me in the hospital, and we had a great talk and discovered that we actually have a lot in common. In fact, she came to see me a few times, and then she came to see me at the house, and I guess that we are sort of starting to see each other.”
“See each other?”
“Yeah,” Dana says, blushing even more. “Like … romantically.”
I could not be more surprised. “What? You’re kidding.” I take a second to take it in. “That’s fantastic, really. I hope she’s good to you.”
Another chink in Victoria’s armor. Laura won’t be going anywhere near her, not now.
And, of course, I’m happy for Dana.
She nods. “I think she will be. After Victoria … Laura is just something I never could have imagined. She’s so kind, so thoughtful and sweet, so romantic and gentle. We can talk about anything, and we do.”
Before I forget, I tell Dana I have a surprise for her.
“What is it?” she asks, eyeing me with interest.
“The boys and I, along with the drama club, are throwing a return party for you in the theatre this Friday evening! I haven’t seen Laura since we all came back to school, but she’s definitely invited too, of course.” I grin at her, and Dana squeals with excitement.
“A party? No one has ever thrown a party for me before! This will be so much fun! Thank you!” She gushes and then stops short suddenly. “Oh wow … what am I going to wear?”