by K E Osborn
I stayed outside sitting on a bench until the morning. People would come and go, and some would ask if I was all right. I’d simply nod, and they would walk off.
As the sun rose, I walked back inside and used the restroom. I looked at myself in the mirror, and I looked as crappy as I felt. I washed my face and went back out to the waiting room. I sat, feeling as if I were in a trance. I stared at a magazine for a few hours, but I wasn’t reading it. In fact, it was on the coffee table in front of me. I didn’t even pick it up. It was taunting me with the headline saying, ‘Ten Ways to be a Great Father This Easter.’ I sat and thought about how I’d never hear Aiden call me Dad. How every time I’d hear him call Niall Dad or Daddy, it would break my heart just that little bit more.
I had given Callie a present, a crib that I carved myself, and that knowledge helped in some small way in that I knew Aiden would have some part of me with him while he slept. I continued to stare at the magazine, and I heard laughter and footsteps behind me. I looked up casually to see Niall with a big, stupid grin on his face. He came over to me, and I stood to greet him. Even though all I wanted to do was punch the living shit out of him, I had to keep up the pretense of excitement.
“It’s a boy, Mike,” he exclaimed, slapping me on the back. “I wanted to call him Niall Jr., but Callie was resolute on naming him Aiden. God only knows why. Anyway, I have a son,” he confirmed.
So, I nodded and faked a smile. No fucking way was my son going to be called Niall fucking Jr.!
“Geez, Mike, you look like shit. Didn’t you sleep at all?”
“No, why, did you?” I asked.
He laughed. “Like a baby. Woke up in time to cut the cord,” he said, and those words infuriated me.
Oh, for God’s sake, he wasn’t even there to help Callie with her birthing.
What the fuck!
I couldn’t hate him more than I did at that moment.
“How are they?” I asked, wanting to know every damn detail.
“Who?” Niall said, and I rolled my eyes.
“Callie and Aiden,” I said, sounding more annoyed than I meant to.
“Oh, right, yeah… good, I suppose. Aiden’s a healthy seven pounds two ounces. He’s going to be a big lad like his father,” he explained.
“And Callie?” I asked, and he shrugged.
“She wouldn’t stop moaning and complaining. Mike, you did the right thing staying single. Women are no more than a convenience. Good for sex and making kids that’ll take over the family business,” he said.
I had to look away or else I was seriously going to pound his face into the middle of next week.
“Can I see them?” I asked through gritted teeth.
Niall shrugged and pulled out a cigar putting it in his mouth and lighting. The smell instantly making me want to vomit. “Do what you want. She’s sleeping. But the kid’s in the crib so you can see him if you like. He’s pretty cute. Must be good genes, I suppose.”
I was so angry with Niall. I couldn’t believe his attitude. Why Callie married him, I’d never understand. I opened the doors and walked to the reception desk.
“Hi, I’m here to see Callie O’Connell,” I explained to the nurse who smiled and nodded, walking me toward her room. My heart was pounding in my chest, and my palms were sweaty. I was nervous because I had no idea what to expect.
“She had a rough labor, so she might be a little groggy,” the nurse said and pointed toward room seven.
I nodded, walked over, and looked inside. Callie was asleep and looked terrible—beautiful but terrible. She was pale, and her hair was a mess. My heart broke that she went through the entire labor alone. I walked in further and movement caught my eye. Next to her bed was the crib. I smiled and walked over to see my Aiden.
My heart pounded in my chest as I approached him. I was about to see my son for the first time, and it both electrified and scared the crap out of me at the same time. But as I stared down at his tiny round face, my entire body ignited with love. I’d never felt anything like it before as I stared down at him all wrapped up in a blue wrap, his tiny eyelids slowly waking up. He had one arm out of his tight wrap. Edging my hand to his, ever so slowly, as soon as he touched my finger, he instantly grabbed on, his tiny little digits wrapping around it with a surprising squeeze. Emotion overwhelmed me as I let out a quiet sob and soaked him in.
My son. My Aiden.
My eyes filled with unshed tears. I’d never known this kind of intensity before as I stared at him with his tiny hand holding mine. There was something so powerful in that.
“You can hold him if you want to,” Callie stated, and it startled me.
With my free hand, I caressed her cheek. Callie smiled and raised her hand to hold mine.
“He’s perfect,” I whispered, and she nodded.
“Just like his father,” she said.
A single tear finally rolled down my cheek. Callie held onto my hand tightly, and I looked back at our son. The love I felt for both of them at that moment was all-consuming.
I was a dad.
I was his dad.
But the sad part was he would never know me as his father.
I moved my hand from his and rested it on his tummy to feel him breathing. I couldn’t believe I had made something so beautiful.
“How are you?” Callie asked, and I shook my head not knowing what to say. “I know how you feel, but trust me, it makes everything worth it when you hold him for the first time.”
I was nervous because I didn’t know how to hold a baby. But I put both hands into his crib and lifted him out, making sure to support his head. Aiden wriggled a little but then went straight back to sleep as soon as I cradled him in my arms.
My damn heart exploded, and my smile was so wide it hurt my cheeks, but I didn’t care. I was holding my son, and it felt so right. I looked over to Callie, and she was crying. I sat on the edge of her bed. She reached out and rested her hand on my knee and watched as I made stupid faces at our son.
It was the best moment of my life until I looked at his name tag on his crib—Aiden Niall Patrick O’Connell.
Yes, I had given him his first name, but his other three were all named after people I hated.
My teeth ground together, my muscles involuntarily tensed as my pulse sped up while a heat so insatiably hot ravaged my body. I flinched my knee away from Callie’s hand. I knew it was harsh, but I was hurt—yet again.
“What’s with his middle names?” I whispered.
“Mike, I’m sorry, but it was the only way I could get Niall to agree to name him Aiden and not Niall, Jr. I know that must be hard for you, but I swear, if it were up to me, his name would be Aiden Harrison O’Leary, but we can’t always get what we want, Mike. Neither you nor I can while Niall is in our lives,” she said, trying to sit up on the bed.
“Hey, don’t move... you need to rest. It’s okay. I knew how this was going to go. It was just a shock to see it, that’s all.” I exhale. “I’m sorry. I’m so happy and yet so devastatingly upset all at the same time. I don’t know how to deal with these emotions, Callie.” I bounced Aiden gently and then leaned down, kissing his tiny forehead.
“I know, Mike, I’m exactly the same. I truly wish things were different, but they can never be. I guess we made our bed this way, and now we have to live with the consequences of that decision,” she said as she wiped a tear away from her face.
“I will always be here, Callie. It’s you and me for eternity. Remember?”
“I remember,” she replied.
That’s when Niall walked back in.
That’s when my moment with my family was over.
“Isn’t he amazing, Mike?” Niall asked, walking over and taking Aiden, my son, away from me.
My stomach catapulted through the floor as I immediately mourned the loss.
“He’s more than amazing, sir,” I stated and looked over at Callie.
She smiled at me, and I stood and moved to exit. “I’ll leave the happy fami
ly in peace. Let me know when you need me to pick you up,” I said, and turned and walked out of the door.
When I got to the car, I sat in the seat and sobbed into the steering wheel, letting all the emotion out. I was always such a mess when it came to Callie—but I never, ever let anyone else see it. Now, I would have to be doubly careful with the addition of Aiden. I would have to work harder to keep my emotions in check. And I had no idea how I was going to manage that.
As time slowly passed, I’d drive Niall to work and then return to their mansion to spend the day with Aiden and Callie. Niall never figured it out even though I was always around for every birthday and special occasion. I made sure I was a key person in Aiden’s life, even if he didn’t know why. The first time he called Niall Daddy was the hardest thing I’d ever had to endure.
Niall didn’t even care, he just said, “No, I’m Father, not Daddy,” and that statement killed me inside. I knew Niall was going to be hard on Aiden, but not even letting your one-year-old son call you Daddy? Well, I thought was despicable.
A year later when Aiden was two, Callie told me she was pregnant. I had no idea how to take that little piece of news. I knew this baby wasn’t mine because we hadn’t even kissed let alone slept together, so it made me painfully aware that she was sleeping with Niall. I don’t know why I was surprised. She was, after all, married to the cretin.
Aiden would have a sibling, and it wouldn’t be mine.
I didn’t handle it well.
I avoided Callie for most of her pregnancy.
I know that was really unforgivable of me, but again, I was hurting. I thought she’d only ever want children with me, but I guess that was impossible seeing as she is so fucking stubborn and wouldn’t divorce the ignorant asshole.
Killian was born, and he was a sweet kid. Much to my amazement, I learned to love him but never with the same emotions as I felt for my own son. Aiden got along with his half-brother really well. They were the best of friends, and in a way, it made me happy he would have a sibling to play with.
Two years later, Brielle was born, and it brought up all those emotions all over again. I didn’t resent Killian and Brielle, I was simply sad that they could’ve been mine and Callie’s, not Niall’s. I felt like I was cheated out of a life where it would have been perfect.
It wasn’t until Aiden was getting close to school age that I offered to be the one to drive Aiden to school and wherever else needed. Niall hired a new chauffeur, and I was assigned Aiden. Callie would look after Killian and Brielle, and I’d pretty much be responsible for Aiden. Which was incredible news.
I knew Niall didn’t like how Aiden would always run to me first, but secretly it made me ecstatic.
The years passed, and Aiden grew into an amazing and wonderfully strong man.
He really was my pride and joy, and I loved him more every second of every day.
I know that’s soppy, but it’s true.
I love my son and his mother, and I guess that brings me back to where I am…
NOW
… standing in old-man Harris’ barn waiting for Callie and the kids to arrive. Aiden knows my plan, but Jeni, Killian, Brielle, Logan, and Daniel have no idea. I’ve decorated the barn with tiny electric-lit lanterns which are hanging from the rafters. The Harris’ barn hasn’t been in use for years, but I brought everything to make it look exactly the same as it did when Callie and I used to come here all those years ago. There’s a haystack, and I even bought some baby chicks to run around on the floor and got the okay from Aiden to keep them at the guesthouse after tonight. I made a coop for them this afternoon while Callie was out with Jeni and Brielle.
I’m so nervous. I can’t believe after all these years, and after everything we’ve been through, that I’m finally asking Callie to marry me.
I straighten my tie and make sure everything is in place and ready to go. I’ve even set up the backyard like the dinner-dance we went to, so after I propose, we can all have dinner and do some dancing.
Just me and my family.
I hear the car pull up, and my heart’s thudding ferociously in my chest. I’m sweating, and I hold my hand out in front of me to see that I’m shaking.
Hold it together, man!
Everyone is talking and laughing outside, but I can’t hear what they’re saying over this persistent ringing in my ears.
The barn door creeps open.
Holy crap!
I freeze to the spot.
“Seriously, Aiden, what are we doing here? And how do you know about this place?” Callie asks. Her voice, as always, is angelic to my ears. I never get tired of hearing her speak.
“Mom, c’mon, just go inside. There’s a surprise for you,” Aiden tells her as the door creeps open a little more.
I pick up the bunch of flowers from the hay bale and wait for Callie to enter. I seriously don’t know if I want to scream with joy or just throw up, my nerves are shot to pieces.
The door opens fully and Callie walks in. She looks up and notices the lanterns first, and she smiles. The baby chickens run under her feet, and she laughs as she looks down at them and picks one up. She walks in a little further, and all the kids step in behind her. Callie’s really a sight to behold. Even though it’s been years since we first met, she’s still as beautiful today as she was then. She laughs at the little chick in her hand and walks in noticing me.
She smiles and bites her lip.
I love it when she does that.
“Mike?” she questions as she walks, dodging the baby chicks.
“Hi, sweetheart,” I chime and step over handing her the flowers.
Callie smiles and places the chick down, giving it a little pat on its head before it runs off over to Jeni. She stands and looks at me lovingly, then takes the flowers from me and smells them. “Did you do all of this for me?”
“I would do all this and more for you, Callie Anne King,” I claim, taking her hand in mine and kissing it tenderly.
“Oh, Mike, you didn’t need to go to all this trouble…” She pauses. “Wait, why are you doing this?”
I take a deep breath and reach out for the flowers and place them on the haystack. She looks at me with her eyebrows creased, but she has a huge grin.
I look over at Aiden, he’s smiling brightly, then he nods, giving me the go-ahead.
I kiss her hand again and then bend down on one knee. There is an audible gasp from everyone except Aiden, who’s smiling brightly.
Callie’s hand shoots to her mouth, and tears form in her eyes. “Callie, from the moment I met you, you have always been the unattainable woman in my life. Circumstances have shaped us and made us into the people we are today, and with our history, I knew we were going to one day end up together. We had to. Because if I lived a full life without you, I never would’ve truly lived. Callie, you complete me, and I love you more and more every day.” Her bottom lip trembles as I continue, “I’ve only ever wanted one thing since I met you, and that was for you to become my wife,” I say as her hands shake in mine.
“Callie Anne King… will you finally make me the happiest man in the history of the world and marry me?”
She’s looking at me so lovingly as I kneel and wait for her answer. She’s shaking so much, and I raise my eyebrow at her as I continue to wait. My heart is about to go off like a rocket out of my chest if she doesn’t say something soon.
“Callie?” I ask.
“Oh my God… yes. Mike… yes. Of course,” she bursts out with a giant smile.
I explode with pure happiness and get up with Callie’s help.
Damn this old age.
She lunges into my arms, and I hold on to her so tightly while the kids all cheer behind us. Callie is laughing and crying while I nuzzle into her hair, and she pulls back, looking at me through tear-soaked eyes.
“It was always you. Mike. We’ve wasted so many years, I never want to be apart from you again. I should’ve married you all those years ago,” she admits, then kisses me passio
nately, not caring who’s watching. I kiss her back with just as much enthusiasm. I love her and want to take her up to the top of that haystack right now, but I don’t think the kids will approve. Well, they would probably approve, they just wouldn’t want to know about it.
I can’t help the emotion running through me.
I’m finally getting my girl.
“Are you crying, Mike? You never cry,” Brielle asks.
“Oh, Brielle, if only you knew how untrue that statement is,” I say, and she laughs.
Aiden walks over and shakes my hand, and then the other kids take turns hugging their mother.
“Good job, Mike, almost as good as my proposal,” Aiden jests with a smirk.
“Oh, your proposal was pretty good, but I think Callie really liked this one. This place has a lot of meaning for us. Maybe one day I can tell you all about it,” I tell him, and he smiles.
“I’d like that, Mike.” Aiden smiles. “Congratulations, Mom.”
“You knew, didn’t you?” Callie asks, accusing Aiden.
He shrugs. “Sorry, Mom, but aren’t you glad I brought you out here now?”
Callie giggles, and that sound makes me melt as she looks at me with tears in her eyes. “I’m happier than I’ve ever been in my life,” she admits and walks back over to me.
I wrap my arm around her shoulders and lean in, kissing her head.
“Okay, okay, that’s enough with the mush. Let’s get to dinner and dancing,” Aiden announces, smiling at his mother.
“Dinner and dancing?” Callie asks.
“You’ll see.” I grin and walk with her toward the back of the Harris’ farm where the dinner-dance is about to get underway.
“Oh Mike, it’s exactly how I remember it. How’d you do all this?” she asks, looking at me in astonishment.
“You and me for eternity, right? I’d find a way to give you the moon if you desired it. That’s how powerful my love is for you,” I tell her, and she bites her bottom lip and leans in for a kiss.
We get through dinner, and the dancing is in full swing when I take Callie by the hand and lead her away from the kids and back to the barn. I feel like a sinful schoolboy sneaking off behind the building to make out.