by Jackie D.
“His crimes run the gamut: wire fraud, mail fraud, racketeering, money laundering, securities fraud, aiding and abetting, falsification of books and records, false filings with the SEC, and conspiracy.”
Dylan handed Emma the change of clothes. “I thought you might want to be more comfortable.”
Emma absently took the clothes from her. “It also says that he’s probably responsible for over one hundred contract killings.”
Dylan continued to scroll through the information when Emma left to change. Law enforcement agencies throughout the world had been trying to prosecute him for over twenty-five years. But he had, in the words of one journalist, “a knack for never being in the wrong place at the wrong time.”
Dylan leaned back in the chair and sipped her wine. Emma emerged from the bedroom, looking adorable in shorts that were too long on her and Dylan’s favorite shirt. Dylan didn’t realize she was staring until Emma spoke to her.
“This could be really big for you, huh?”
Dylan ran her finger along the rim of the wine glass. For a reason she couldn’t quite put her finger on, she wanted Emma to understand why this was so important to her. She wanted Emma to understand her, to know her. She knew Emma could and probably already had read all about her, but she wanted to tell her story.
Dylan leaned forward, putting her elbows on the table. “I didn’t know my parents. I don’t say that because I want you to feel sorry for me, I don’t. I’m telling you that because it’s just part of the story. By the time I was eighteen, I’d been in fourteen foster homes. Some were unbearable, some were okay, and some I would’ve liked to make my forever home.” Emma reached for her hand, but Dylan pulled away. She didn’t want to be distracted. “I was lucky. I flew under the radar mostly and excelled in sports and school. I got a full ride to the University of Washington and was recruited to the CIA right out of college. The CIA suited me. I didn’t need a place to call home. I didn’t have any family or friends to lie to or to worry about me. I’ve been on the move in one mission or another since I was twenty-four. When I was chosen for this assignment, I was thrilled. It was going to be my career maker. I was going to get my first monumental tag at thirty. I was going to prove all the people in my life wrong, the ones who said I’d never amount to anything. I was going to prove I was worth something.” She sipped her wine, pushing the old memories aside.
“I’ve been inside the Bratva for the last three years. I’ve had to do unspeakable things to gain my position as quickly as I have. Things I’m not proud of, things that keep me from being able to sleep. All to help dismantle one of the most dangerous criminal organizations in the world. Now, it’s been practically dropped into my lap, and it may all be for naught. If we take O’Brien, Nikolai will have me killed. Even if I escape, I won’t get to take him or the organization down. My cover will be blown. If we try to take him first, O’Brien will get away. I help you guys and I lose three years of the hardest work I’ve ever had to do. I don’t, and one of the worst criminals in America gets away. It’s a no win.” Dylan sat back in her chair again.
Emma studied her, and Dylan waited for the barrage of positive reinforcement. Emma would tell her that it was all for the greater good, her sacrifices would matter, and that everything would work out in the end. Dylan was sure Emma had an overabundance of motivational phrases tucked away for something just like this.
Emma took her hand, even when Dylan tried to pull away again. “That must be so frustrating. I can’t even begin to imagine how difficult this will be for you. And thank you for trusting me with your story. I know that probably wasn’t easy for you.”
Dylan couldn’t do anything but stare. “You aren’t going to lecture me about the bigger picture? Being a team player?”
Emma looked confused. “You’ve invested years into this assignment. Then, we show up out of nowhere and highjack it. No, I completely understand why you’re frustrated. I also understand what it’s like, feeling like you have to prove yourself. We have very different stories, but I know what that feels like. I can’t fathom the position you’re in.”
Dylan watched Emma’s eyes. There were different emotions swirling around in the tranquil blue, but what hurt Dylan was the sadness she saw. “Who hurt you?”
Emma let go of Dylan’s hand and took a sip of her wine. “No one hurt me, not like they hurt you. I’ve just always been a bit of an outcast. I grew up with two siblings, my parents are caring and loving. But I never felt like I fit in anywhere. The only person who ever really understood me was my grandma, and when she died, I felt completely alone. I graduated high school at sixteen and college at nineteen. All the kids thought I was weird, awkward, or both. I’ve never had any real friends. Even when I thought I did, they were just using me for school. I was thrilled about taking this assignment. One, because it will be great for my career. But two, because I’ll be able to show everyone that I can be part of a team, an important part.”
“We’re quite the pair,” Dylan said, hoping to lighten the mood. “And, Emma?”
“Hmm?”
“I don’t think you’re weird or awkward. I think you’re insanely smart, beautiful, and possibly the most authentic person I’ve ever met.”
Emma blushed but met her eyes anyway. “Is that one of your lines?”
Dylan’s body warmed. She wasn’t sure how to manage what she was feeling. Women didn’t often question her, only wanting from her what she wanted from them—nothing but a brief reprieve.
Dylan ran her thumb over the top of Emma’s hand. “It wasn’t a line.”
Emma stared where their skin touched. “Dylan, I can’t go down this road with you. I’m not built like that. I can’t do flings. I’ll fall, and you’ll already be long gone.”
Dylan heard the words but couldn’t stop touching her. “How do you know I won’t be there?”
“Because that’s how you’re built.” There was no accusation or venom in Emma’s words. She meant them for what they were, the truth.
Dylan felt a lump form in the back of her throat. Words were stuck there, choking her. She wanted to let them spill out of her mouth. She wanted to tell Emma that maybe she could be different. She wanted to tell Emma that she was lonely too. The realization caught her off guard, and she stood. Emotional entanglements weren’t part of this job. Those could get you killed.
A knock at the door gave her the amnesty she needed from her unintended self-reflection. She wasn’t surprised to see who was on the other side. His arms were the size of tree trunks, he had sunken eyes, and a five o’clock shadow that was more like a forty-eight-hour shadow.
“Nikolai wants you at his house at zero-nine-hundred tomorrow.”
Dylan nodded. “You could have just called, Ivan.”
Ivan shook his head. “I’m supposed to do a face-to-face. No phones until tomorrow.” Ivan looked around her, his gaze landing on Emma. “Is that the same girl from tonight?”
“Yes.”
Ivan looked like he was going to say more but changed his mind and turned to leave. “Don’t be late, Sasha.”
“I’m never late.”
He waved as he disappeared down the steps.
She turned and faced Emma again. The mood in the room had changed. The closeness they’d shared just minutes before was gone. “I hate to do this, but I’m going to have to put you on a bus in the morning. We can’t risk one of the team coming to get you, and I can’t be caught leaving town until I know what’s happening.”
Emma gave her a faint smile, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “I understand.” She started walking to the couch. “I’m pretty tired.”
Dylan wanted the closeness back, even if it was just for a moment. She made it to her and touched her arm. “I’ll sleep on the couch. Please, I’d feel like an asshole if you slept out here. There’re extra toothbrushes in the top drawer of my bathroom. Feel free to use one.”
Emma crossed her arms, not making eye contact. “Okay, thank you. Why don’t you go ahead and get
ready for bed first? I’ll use the bathroom when you’re done.”
“Emma, I—”
Emma shook her head. “Don’t. Let’s not do this. I’m tired, and we have a lot to do tomorrow.”
Thirty minutes later, Dylan hit the pillow under her head for the sixth time. She was frustrated with her feelings, angry she couldn’t articulate them, and disappointed that she hoped her pillow would smell like Emma when she went to bed the following night. She rolled over onto her side, hoping a different position would help her fall asleep. She should be planning her next steps. She should be figuring out how she could take down Nikolai and O’Brien, but all she could think about was the way Emma had felt pressed against her. The way her hair felt against her cheek and how she never wanted to be the cause of sadness in her eyes.
Chapter Eighteen
“I hate all three of you!” Jennifer leaned over and grabbed her knees. She coughed again and pushed Caden away when she placed a hand on her back.
“You did great.” Tyler was trying to make her feel better, but the look Jennifer shot her proved it hadn’t worked. “We ran five miles. You should be proud of yourself.”
Jennifer flopped down onto the ground and put her arm over her eyes. “No, you ran five miles. I ran, walked, and cried.”
Brooke laughed. “It’s nice to see you haven’t lost your dramatic flair.”
“I’m going to take her back and get her cleaned up. We’ll meet you down at control in a bit,” Caden said as she pulled Jennifer to her feet. “You did great, babe.”
“I hate you the most.” Jennifer moaned as she wrapped her arm around Caden’s waist, leaning on her as they walked to the main house.
“It’s only seven. Stop worrying.” Brooke grabbed Tyler’s hand when she rechecked her watch. Brooke kissed her softly, smiling against her. “You worry too much. She’s with Dylan. I’m sure she’s fine.”
“This is Emma’s first assignment and we sent her into the lion’s den. I’m going to worry.” Tyler kissed Brooke again and then backed away to stretch.
Brooke mimicked her movement. “She’s with a lion tamer. She’ll be fine.”
Tyler pulled her arm across her chest, enjoying the sensation of loosening her muscles. “Weren’t you scared on your first mission?”
Brooke shrugged. “Not really. I was nervous, sure. But I had you there. I knew you wouldn’t let anything happen to me.”
Tyler shook her head. “I’m not a miracle worker and neither is Dylan. We can’t stop everything. Some things are out of our control.”
Brooke shrugged. “Exactly. Worrying about them won’t make a difference.”
“I’m going to worry. There’s nothing you can do about that.”
Brooke put her arms around Tyler’s neck. “I know, and I’m going to tell you to relax. There’s nothing you can do about that.”
Tyler kissed Brooke softly. “Did you get around to reading that email from your mom?”
Brooke pulled her mouth away and stared. “That’s the least sexy thing you’ve ever said to me.” She turned and started toward the main house.
Tyler caught up and took her hand, relieved when Brooke didn’t pull away. She knew if Brooke wasn’t slightly pushed, she’d never get the information out of her. Not on this subject. “What did she say?”
Brooke sighed. “That she was open to having dinner with us.”
“Hey! That’s something!”
Brooke stopped walking and turned to face her. She crossed her arms and lifted an eyebrow. “I’m not interested in my mother’s small acts of charity. She either accepts me for who I am, or not. I’m not going to be some check mark on a list of things she needs to do to fit in with her friends.” She turned and kept walking.
Tyler let her go. She knew Brooke well enough to know when she needed a little space. The dynamics between Brooke and her mother were complicated, confusing, and messy. Brooke was as strong willed as they came, and from her brief interactions with Janice, she knew they shared that trait. Tyler wanted Brooke to have a good relationship with her mom, but she knew she couldn’t force it. All she could do was be supportive of Brooke, even if Brooke acted like she didn’t need it.
Tyler decided to head down to the control center. She’d shower a bit later. Right now, she wanted to check in with Tony, who’d handled the computers overnight, and see if there were any updates with O’Brien. She jogged over to Emma when she saw her walking up the path in the same direction.
“Hey,” Tyler said when she got closer.
Emma ran a hand through her hair and smiled, but she didn’t make eye contact. “Morning.”
“How did everything go? Are you okay?” Tyler was a bit unnerved by the way Emma crossed her arms. She seemed on guard for some reason.
Emma’s eyes fell to the hatch that led to their control center. “There’s a lot to discuss. Are the others already here?”
Tyler pointed her thumb to the house behind them. “They’re getting ready for the day. They’ll be here soon.” She gingerly put a hand on Emma’s shoulder. “Are you okay? Is Dylan okay?”
Emma chewed on her thumb. “Dylan’s fine.” She finally met Tyler’s eyes. “I just don’t really feel like myself.” She pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose.
Tyler led her off the path and under the shade of a nearby tree. “Emma, did something happen to you? Did someone do something to you?” Tyler felt the panic crawl from her stomach into her throat.
Emma searched her face, and her eyes grew large. “Oh no, nothing bad happened to me. No one did anything to me.” She smiled sheepishly at Tyler. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make it seem like that.”
Tyler was relieved, but there was more to the story. “Do you want to talk about it?” Emma glanced up at the house. “Would you rather speak to Brooke or Jennifer?”
Emma stared down at the ground again. “No. It’s just that…I think I may have feelings for Dylan.”
“Oh,” Tyler said and regretted she didn’t have something more encouraging to add.
Emma continued before Tyler could think of something else. “I know that it’s inappropriate and we’re completely wrong for each other. She enjoys a surplus of women, she’s on a long-term assignment, and I’m not one for anything temporary. Or anything at all, really. And yet, I’m just finding it rather distracting, a little confusing, and it has me off-kilter. I’m never off-kilter with work issues, and I’ve worked so hard to get where I am. The last thing I need is to make mistakes because my focus is misplaced.”
Tyler laughed and patted Emma on the shoulder. “You know Brooke was in my class at the Farm when we met. Talk about inappropriate.” She sighed. “I fought my feelings the best I could, but you see how far that got me.”
Emma looked at her questioningly. “So, is it just because we’re working together? Will this go away once we’re apart?”
Tyler wasn’t sure how she’d surmised that from what she said. “I don’t know if it will go away or not, or why you’re having these feelings. I guess that could be why, or maybe your feelings are genuine.”
Emma rolled her eyes. “I need definitive answers. I don’t function well in the gray.”
Tyler smiled. “I understand. I didn’t either. Unfortunately, that’s not how this works. But I wouldn’t worry about your focus or professionalism. I trust you to do what you need to do when things start to happen.”
Emma’s eyes focused behind her again. “Could we just keep this between us? I don’t want it to become a thing.”
Tyler nodded and turned toward the sound of the others joining them. “Of course.”
“Thanks,” Emma said and headed toward the control center.
Caden was beside her a moment later. “What was that about? Everything okay?”
“Yeah,” Tyler said and moved toward the door that would lead them below. “Let’s get to work.”
Tyler didn’t know enough about Emma to know what would come of her and Dylan. But she knew people. From what sh
e could discern from Emma’s body language, and the way she blushed, she was already in much deeper than she wanted to admit. Tyler had meant what she said to Emma. She trusted her judgment, but it wouldn’t prevent Tyler from concerning herself with the outcome. Any kind of disruption in unit cohesiveness could spell trouble for all of them. She hoped Dylan knew what she was doing.
* * *
The server handed Dylan a cappuccino and placed a plate of blini on the table. She wasn’t hungry, but she wanted to seem as relaxed as possible. She put a few pieces of fruit on top of the thin cake, folded it, and took a bite.
Nikolai was watching her closely. “Work up an appetite last night, Sasha?”
Dylan winked at him, unwilling to give him an answer. “What happened, Nikolai?” She slid her phone across the table to him. “It’s my understanding we no longer need these.”
He handed the phone to Ivan. “Our last pakhan made foolish decisions. It didn’t turn out well for him. So, now it’s my turn. Hopefully, my decisions are less foolish.” He handed her a different phone. “You’ll take my old position.”
Dylan took another bite of her breakfast. “What about my old jobs? Who will do them now?” She made sure not to hold her breath, waiting for an answer.
“Bogdan will take your old position.” Nikolai picked up a blini, dipped it in whipped cream, and shoved it in his mouth.
“What about my security job? Who will watch her?” Dylan sipped her coffee, keeping eye contact with Nikolai.
Nikolai waved his hand. “Roman cared for her. I do not. We have several countries interested in acquiring her. I’m selling her to the highest bidder at the gala. They’ll pick her up from there.”
Dylan willed her hand not to shake as she brought the cup up to her mouth. “Why not just sell her to the Americans? I’m sure they’d pay a hefty sum to have her back,” she said and smiled.
“I don’t want the Americans anywhere near my business. That’s why we’re getting rid of the problem as soon as possible.” He took another bite of his breakfast.