by Kay Leitch
Maggie felt as drained as Helen, the house felt dark and quiet, too quiet, the boys were both out and probably would be until daybreak and it was at times like these that Maggie felt at her most vulnerable…loneliness would engulf her… she would start thinking about Greg, something that she tried never to do, and the pain which she could usually keep well hidden in the corners of her mind would flood in racking her body with uncontrollable sobs. She felt like howling like an animal…she wrapped her arms around herself and waited for it to subside, which it did leaving her shaking and shattered…she knew better than most about being the weaker sex, she thought, Greg's loss could still bring her to her knees…well at least no one knew, she put on such a good show…shagging them and leaving them, everybody thought she was as hard as nails, and that was how she liked it. She went to the kitchen and got herself a sleeping tablet, she had cut down a lot on them since dating Charles…but tonight she just needed oblivion.
CHAPTER 46 - 2013
He didn't know how long he had been here, at first he had tried to keep count seeing the light and dark through the cracks in the wooden walls, but he had lost count…the shed was becoming more and more airless, the only time the air was changed was when the door had been opened and his huge silent prison guard would leave him food and fresh water. He tried asking him questions, he shouted at him, pleaded with him but all to no avail, the man just deposited the food and left… no one had spoken to him, he still did not know why he had been imprisoned here…he knew he was being left to die…and he knew that he wouldn't have the strength to live much longer.
Man's will to survive though, was amazingly strong, he continued to grasp every piece of food that was thrown at him, he rationed his water just in case there was no more delivered…why not just give up, he often thought about it…he was so weak now that he could barely struggle to the bucket to relieve himself, the air was fetid and the stench was at times overpowering…he just lay in his own filth on the thin mean mattress, his mind wandered whether he wanted it to or not.
He had been having hallucinations, he kept seeing her…that fucking little bitch, mocking him pointing at him…she was happy to see him in misery lying in his own shit…other times, the worst times Wendy would come, standing over him watching him with sadness in her eyes…accusing him, pointing a finger at him…it wasn't my fault…you know what she was like…you always said she was too pretty for her own good, flirting with all the boys…it wasn't my fault…you should have seen the way she looked at me flaunting herself in front of me…she was no innocent child, she had been born a whore, she had a whore’s body…don't stare at me, she was asking for it…
At night would come terror…terror of the unknown, terror of death and what comes after death…no wonder he clung to life…no God would judge him leniently he knew…the harshest punishment of hell awaited him…sometimes he pleaded in the dark for forgiveness…no one heard his pleas…no one was listening.
CHAPTER 47 - CARLA
Carla went home after her row with Maggie and had a good cry, she told James what had happened and he had been quite indignant about the things that Maggie had said.
'What is up with her? All you were trying to do was protect Helen, she had no right to lay into you like that sweetheart, it seems to me that everything you said made complete sense, she just a drama queen. She would love to see Helen walk out on Wills because she thinks that all men deserve that sort of treatment,' but Carla wouldn't have Maggie criticised.
'Oh come on now James, I can quite clearly see why I upset her, she is so sensitive about anything to do with Greg and I had to throw that in her face…oh I am such a stupid cow, of course she's going to go off on one…' she could see James had more to say, but she interrupted him before he could start.
'No I appreciate your standing up for me darling …thank you…but I was a patronising bitch tonight…I think I'm getting to used to bossing people around and thinking I know best…which by the way I do when it comes to you…but I will have to ring and apologise tomorrow,' she sighed.
'I would have done tonight but Tracy thought it would be best if I wait, and she's right…oh God James I am so lucky I have you, sometimes I feel quite smug like I've won a prize or something…promise me you'll never change, I couldn't bear to lose you…' she burst into fresh tears and James pulled her into his arms with a laugh. 'Bloody hell Carla you lot have been working up an emotional storm at your meeting tonight haven't you, I love you, you dopey cow and I'm not going anywhere.'
James could see that tonight's argument had left Carla needing a little reassurance, he turned her so that she was looking in his eyes. 'I'm yours Detective Inspector, and I WILL NOT let you down I'm not such a fool, even if you can be now and again, a patronising cow and you seem to love bossing us all around. You have turned me into weak man without a mind of my own so I just can't live without you…come on love let's get you to bed you look like you're about drop.' Carla gave him a grateful watery smile and they made their way upstairs.
Ted had already arrived at the Happy Valley care home by the time Carla got there the next morning, he was waiting in the car park reading through the case notes, he seemed so engrossed that he didn't notice Carla until she tapped on his window and made him jump.
'What the…oh hi Carla, I got here early so I thought I would just go through the notes before we speak to this fellow.'
Carla nodded and waited for him to get out of the car before she said, 'Anything new spring out to you? I've been over and over it, unfortunately everything seems to point to Vanessa as far as I'm concerned, the picture of the earring just confirmed everything…we just need some solid proof, something to prove that Vanessa actually met up with Louise…no news on her mobile I suppose…' at Ted's negative shake of the head she let out a frustrated sigh, 'it just still doesn't sit right with me though Ted, I mean ok it might be a bit of a shock your daughter who you abandoned years before turning up and wanting some answers, but would that push her to kill the girl, and in such a frenzied way…Vanessa seems shell shocked and when I asked her if she'd arranged to meet with Louise she looked genuinely bewildered, she said how could she, she had no idea where she was…it sort of rang true…anyway let's see what darling daddy has to say for himself, I'm quite looking forward to this.'
Ten minutes later they were walking back to their cars, Derek Styles had not yet returned from his daughters they were told. 'No,' the rather irritated sister in charge had said, 'He hadn't bothered to tell them that he was staying away any longer and no they hadn't so far been successful in getting in touch with either him or his daughter to find out when he would be back, but this was such typical inconsiderate behaviour by Styles that it didn't surprise her at all, and yes she would let Carla know as soon as he got in touch.'
Carla had asked for the address that the nursing home had for Faye Pinner and was mystified when she was given the address in Sevenoaks that they had visited the day before. The sister in charge seemed surprised that Faye was living in Australia. 'Doesn't anybody check up on these addresses, and did anybody actually see Miss Styles arrive to collect her father?' Carla asked in frustration upsetting the already irritable sister even more.
'We are a nursing home not a prison,' she said angrily to Carla, 'Derek Styles is free to come and go as he likes. As I understand it his daughter had arranged for a taxi to pick him up, we made sure he had his medication etc. and all we can do is hope that we are given the right information by their relatives. Derek was one of our more able residents, he had problems with mobility because of a stroke and extensive arthritis in his joints, but he was able to walk short distances using his frame, and had none of the mental problems that some of our residents have, in fact he was irritatingly bright sometimes,' she heaved a sigh and lowered her voice. 'Sometimes he can be extremely rude, it has actually been quite a nice break not having him around…anyway I will keep you informed Inspector, as soon as he gets in touch, at the moment we are not seriously worried, he'll turn up like
the bad penny he is,' she added resignedly.
Carla and Ted drove back to the station in silence, Carla deep in her own thoughts about Maggie and their row the night before, she had tried ringing her mobile first thing this morning but was put straight through to voice mail, she'd left a message asking her to phone but looking at her phone they'd been no missed calls so far. Carla sighed it would just have to wait until she could speak to her properly, but when that would be was anybody's guess, she certainly wouldn't be home before midnight tonight the way this day was going.
Carla got the team together as soon as they got back and set about reviewing everything that they had discovered so far. They knew why Louise was in Kenley, it seemed logical that it would have been Vanessa that had arranged to meet her, despite her insistence that she had no idea how to get in touch with her they now had evidence that the emails that Louise had received were definitely from the computer found at Vanessa's flat. Also they were pretty certain that Vanessa was the owner of the emerald earring that was found at the murder scene, but that in itself wasn't enough to place her there at the time that Louise was killed. Carla simply had to get a breakthrough soon, Chief Inspector Drew was breathing down her neck.
'Let's face it folks after over a month we've got bugger all…we know who she is, we know that she was an orphan that was abandoned outside a hospital as a baby…we know someone possibly her mother contacted her and arranged to meet her, she certainly thought it was her mum she was meeting…who was it that contacted her, if not Vanessa, and why? We need to find that bloody mobile, it must be out there somewhere…I want as many people as you can muster to do another thorough search of the area in the woods…we are only searching for her mobile, concentrate on that and nothing else…' Ted seemed to be working himself up to say something; Carla waited and let him speak.
'I agree that's important…but if you want my opinion we have to bring Vanessa in for questioning, now, quite frankly I don't know what you're waiting for Carla. There is just too much that points in her direction, even if it is all circumstantial, even if your gut feeling is that she wouldn't have killed her daughter, we can now link her directly to Louise, we know that the emails came from her computer, we know she has at some time owned a pair of earrings identical to the one found at the scene of a murder. We would be really neglecting our duty if we overlook her,' he finished looking firmly at Carla, the rest of the team shuffled their feet uncomfortably, but a couple of them were nodding in agreement.
Carla sat for a minute weighing up what Ted had said, 'Ok Ted, you're right I know you are…I'll go over there and bring her in myself…we'll interview her together later. The rest of you…the mobile phone is a priority, and I'll need a couple of you …um Mandy and Frank to come with me, we'll need to search Vanessa's flat.' With a satisfied nod Ted left the room and Carla tried to get her head together…she was convinced that there was so much more to Vanessa's story than she was willing to reveal, she was going to have to dig deep…and she was also sure that that was the key to solving this whole mystery, something to do with Louise herself maybe…what if she had threatened to tell Giles about Vanessa's past, that could be a motive…but Carla just couldn't imagine the gentle Giles coming down heavy on Vanessa about…well anything really, he was so obviously crazy about her…aaaagh she was just going round in circles…again.
With a sigh of determination Carla, Mandy and Frank set off on the short drive from the station to the pub. Giles wasn't around but one of the temporary staff called up to Vanessa and told her Carla was there and then told her to go on up.
Vanessa was on the couch in the living room, she looked dreadful with eyes puffy from crying and her hair lank and greasy, Carla couldn't ever remember her looking so bad, and she looked even more agitated when she saw that Carla had not come alone.
'Vanessa I think we need to ask you a few more questions, and I would prefer to do so at the station so if you could get your coat and let the staff know, I'll drive you there.'
'What, now…I don't understand why at the station, couldn't you ask me your questions here, I'm not very well at the moment Carla, couldn't this wait?'
'No I'm sorry but it can't, we need to interview you at the station because we have all the equipment there to tape our conversation…so if you could just get a coat or whatever…is Giles about, do you want to let him know?'
'He's away all day today…some brewery thing I think, I wasn't listening if I'm honest, I'll be back before he gets home…won't I?'
'Well let's just see how it goes shall we? I can always call him later for you anyway…we will also be conducting a search of the flat Vanessa, while you are at the station…we have a warrant…and I will need the keys to your car.' Carla waited while Vanessa wordlessly handed them over…it was like all the fight had gone out of her. 'Ready?' said Carla gently.
Vanessa seemed to be in a trance as she walked downstairs and got into Carla's car and neither of them spoke as Carla drove to the station.
Carla led Vanessa upstairs to an interview room. 'Can I get you anything…tea, coffee?' asked Carla. Vanessa just shook her head.
'Ok Vanessa I will try not to keep you too long, I'm just going to get my sergeant to sit in with us …won't be long.'
Carla shut the door behind her and let out a sigh, she needed to get this right…she went back downstairs to find Ted.
CHAPTER 48 - May 22nd 1996
The house looks the same…it's funny I expected it to have changed somehow, but then again it has only been seven months or so…just seven months…it has felt like a lifetime.
I go round to the kitchen door…Faye is in there peeling potatoes, or trying to, she's making a right mess of it from what I can see…she looks totally shocked to see me.
'What are you doing here?' she says in an unfriendly voice.
'Hi little squirt…I'm home aren't you pleased to see me?'
Faye throws down the knife she is using and runs out of the room shouting…'Dad, Dad Vanessa's home.'
I brace myself to see him again, at least he will be relieved to see me back, without a baby.
He walks slowly behind Faye into the room; he is looking thinner and older somehow.
'So you've decided to come crawling back have you,' he says with menace in his voice, I find myself trembling, backing away from him. 'You selfish little cow, do you know how your mother has suffered because you went away, she's been out of her mind with worry it's made her ill, she's been bedridden for weeks now…all down to you, you miserable excuse for a daughter…you could have at least written to let her know you were ok, or were you away having such a good time that didn't occur to you?'
I am speechless…I've done what he'd wanted…I've taken care of it on my own.
'I did write,' I am ashamed to hear myself stammering, 'as soon as I had got to where I was going I wrote to Mum, I told her I would be back as soon as I had sorted out something,' I give him a hard stare…surely he would remember why I had had to go, but he just seems to get even more angry.
'Don't lie…we never got any letters from you, we had no idea where you were, if you were alive or dead…your poor mother.'
'Where is Mum I ask, I must let her know I'm home,' I push past him and run up the stairs to her room…she's lying in her bed, trying to raise her head up, she has obviously heard raised voices downstairs…when she sees me standing in the door way she holds out her hands to me, tears streaming down her face.
'Vanessa darling you've come home…oh sweetheart we've been so worried about you, why did you go darling, whatever it was we would have taken care of it …oh come here.'
I run to my Mum sobbing with relief at least she seems pleased to see me, she hugs me for a few minutes and then disengages slowly…painfully and I look at her properly. She looks like a shadow of her former self, like when a balloon has deflated, it's like all the life has been sucked out of her she falls back against the pillows exhausted by the effort of hugging me, there are dark shadows under her eyes and her s
kin looked almost transparent…she is obviously very ill.
'Mum…what is wrong, why are you in bed have you got flu or something?'
'It's a bit more than that, not that you would care…your mum's dying girl…that's what you did to her…take a good look…' Dad has followed me into the room.
Mum tries to stop him speaking, 'No no Derek you mustn't say that…don't listen to him darling, yes I am ill, and I'm sorry that I won't be able to be here with you all for much longer… the lord is calling me to him but,' she takes my hands and looks me in the eye, 'you are not to blame Vanessa…yes we were all sick with worry about you of course, but… I have cancer sweetheart and that's what's killing me…'
'Stop mamby pambying her Wendy,' says Dad pushing past me to the bedside, 'the doctor said you weren't to be stressed…so when missy here decides to run off with some fella and you are stressed out of your mind don't tell me she had nothing to do with it…'
'WHAT! Dad you know I didn't run away with some fella, you know why I went away,' I turn to Mum desperate for her to believe me, '…and I did write to you Mum to let you know I was ok…I don't know why you didn't get my letter, but I promise you I did write.'
'Well that does my heart good sweetheart to know that you thought about us, the letter must have been lost in the post…never mind that now, you're home and that's all that matters,' she holds my hand again like she never wants to let go of it again. 'If it wasn't a boy that you went with…why Vanessa…what made you do it?'