by Donna Grant
Helena looked down to find Jarin’s hand on hers. She hadn’t even realized he’d moved to sit beside her, but she was glad he was there. She tightened her hold, freely taking the comfort and strength he offered.
“Finish it,” Jarin demanded of Armir.
The commander said, “In the pages of the book, it mentions that the bones of the First Witch were scattered across countries, and there is even speculation that some are in the sea, but Malene recalls one section that said ‘the Living Heart can find all the bones.’”
“I see,” Helena murmured.
Jarin eyes flashed with anger. “The Coven is not getting near her.”
“I agree,” Armir said. “I believe we should take Helena back to Blackglade to hide her.”
Helena shook her head before he finished. “I won’t run anymore. It does not matter where I go or how far I travel. Sybbyl and the Coven will find me. I left the abbey for that reason, and it’s why I refuse to go to Blackglade.”
“She’s right,” Jarin added grudgingly. “Sybbyl will find her. We have worked too hard to keep Blackglade hidden from the Coven and anyone else. It needs to remain that way.”
Armir’s brow puckered in a frown. “You intend to fight them?”
Helena nodded, her chin lifting as her courage returned. “I won’t submit to Sybbyl or any of them. It doesn’t matter what they do to me, I will give them nothing.”
The commander lowered his eyes to the fire, the expression on his face sad. “While I approve of your bravery, they would only need to take one look at the two of you to know that by getting their hands on Jarin, you would do whatever they wanted just so they would not harm him.”
Helena turned her head to Jarin, the truth slamming into her. “I would.”
Jarin made a sound in the back of his throat. “As if the Coven could capture me.”
“You’re used to fighting them before the Staff of the Eternal came into play. Things are different now, my friend,” Armir cautioned.
“Then what do we do?” Helena asked as she looked at the commander. “I do not want to run.”
Armir shrugged before leaning to the side on his hand. “There is only one thing you can do. Face them. Alone.”
“Absolutely not,” Jarin stated in a cold tone.
She contemplated the commander’s words while feeling Jarin’s heated gaze on her, silently begging her to agree with him. Finally, she looked at Armir. “What if you’re wrong? What if I’m not a descendant?”
“What did you plan to do before you had this information?” he asked.
Helena swallowed and said, “I was going to face them with Jarin. Live or die, I want it to end. I won’t run anymore.”
“How does you being the Living Heart change anything?”
Jarin pulled his hand from hers and rose to his feet, his face mottled with anger. “It changes everything.”
She reached up and retook his hand. When his light blue eyes met hers, she said, “It changes nothing. I have to do this.”
“With me by your side,” he said as he lowered himself to one knee to face her.
Helena smiled, her heart aching. “There is no one I’d rather have by my side, but I have to do it alone.”
Though he didn’t argue more, she saw all the words he wanted to say, but didn’t, in his eyes. She was terrified of facing the Coven alone, but she also knew she would do anything they wanted, give them anything just to make sure Jarin was safe. That’s how much she cared.
That’s how much she loved him.
It gave her another incentive to best the Coven. Even if she couldn’t beat them, she would make damn sure they knew not to mess with her again.
18
“Nay.” Rage simmered just beneath the surface, and Jarin was tired of holding it back.
Armir paused as the two of them glared at each other over the flames. Helena had risen and gone to stretch her legs with Valdr by her side.
“I know what you are about to ask,” Jarin continued, letting the anger drip from every syllable. “And I will not do it.”
“To remain with her is to hinder her,” Armir argued.
Jarin fought to reclaim the usual calm that surrounded him. “I am the one who convinced her to fight. I promised her that I would stand beside her when she did.”
Armir leaned forward and turned the spit over the fire. “Things have changed since then. Helena is too important for her to fall into the Coven’s hands.”
“You say that as if I’m not aware,” he bit out, not bothering to hide his growing ire.
“You care for her.”
That drew Jarin up short. “What does that matter?”
“It means everything. It means that you will fight to the death for her. It means that you will move Heaven and Earth for her. It means, old friend, that you would die for her.”
Jarin held Armir’s gaze for a long moment, letting it all sink in—and accepting it all for the truth that it was. Jarin hadn’t intended to develop feelings for Helena. They’d progressed before he even realized what was happening, but he wouldn’t change any of it.
What he had with her was...beautiful and perfect. It was something he never believed to be within his reach, and yet he now stood in the glow of it—and he never wanted it to fade.
“I can see by the look on your face that you will never part from her,” Armir said.
Jarin shook his head. “It wouldn’t matter who she was. The Living Heart or not, I would stand beside her, protecting her and fighting with her.”
Armir was silent for a moment. “What if Malene had not changed the laws. Would you still be with her?”
Jarin looked away, his mind drifting to the past and his desire to be a warrior. “From the time I was very little, I knew I wanted to be a warrior for the Varroki. It mattered little what was asked of me because I cared about nothing more than protecting Blackglade and my people. It was no sacrifice to give up ever having a family, not when I was doing such work. You know the extremes I have gone to in order to track down the Coven.”
“Aye,” Armir murmured.
Jarin slid his gaze back to the commander. “Being with a woman then meant nothing because abstaining was just part of my mission. I say all of that so you will understand when I tell you that the undeniable pull I feel toward Helena is inescapable. Even if I were a thousand miles away, I would still be drawn to her. I believe everything I have done, every step I have taken has led me straight to her. So, aye, I would have broken my vows for her.”
“I suspected as much. I think no less of you for such an admission. You’re very lucky.”
Jarin was so wrapped up in his own thoughts that he nearly missed the flash of regret and pain in Armir’s eyes. He studied the commander for a long time.
“What of you?” Jarin asked. “Your position also allows you to take a wife now. Is there someone you want?”
Armir’s green gaze locked on the flames. “Would it surprise you to know that I, too, would have broken my vows?”
“Before Helena, I would’ve said aye. Now that I know what it feels like to be in her arms and know her body, nay. Now you can have this woman you want.”
“Can I?” Armir asked. He snorted softly and shook his head. “I don’t believe I can.”
“There is not a woman in Blackglade who would not want to be yours. Your position alone commands the utmost respect. You are only second in line after Malene.”
Armir shrugged one shoulder. “Position in our world means nothing if the other person does not feel the same.”
“Have you spoken to this woman?”
The commander’s eyes lifted to Jarin. “Nay. And it is better this way. I am used to looking at her from afar.”
Armir had chosen his words carefully, but the fact that he had been so cautious allowed Jarin to figure out who Armir longed for—the Lady of Varroki herself, Malene.
Jarin kept the information to himself. If Armir didn’t wish to say her name, then he wouldn’t either. J
arin had spent little time with Malene, but he had liked her immediately when they met. Everyone did. She had an elegance about her that commanded respect. Added to her intelligence, she was the perfect leader for their people.
Armir cleared his throat. “What is it you feel for Helena?”
“I have not put a name to it.”
“Is it love?”
Jarin shrugged. “Does it matter what it is? My feelings run deep, and that is enough for me.”
“I believe Helena is the Living Heart. That means she has as much—if not more—magic than the Staff of the Eternal. She can face the Coven on her own.”
They were back to that. Jarin wasn’t in the mood for this conversation. “Do you really believe it will just be a few Coven members facing off against Helena? It will be Sybbyl, and she won’t be alone.”
“One way or another, no matter what, it will come down to Sybbyl and Helena,” Armir stated. “From what we learned from Ravyn and Carac, Sybbyl is very confident. Now that she has the staff, she will believe she can get whatever she wants.”
“If Sybbyl is coming for Helena, it’s because she knows Helena is the Living Heart, which also means Sybbyl understands how powerful Helena is.”
Armir’s lips flattened. “Helena can handle it.”
“Have you seen her in battle? Do you know something about her magic I do not?” Jarin demanded angrily.
“Do you believe she isn’t capable of facing the Coven on her own?”
Jarin shook his head. “That is not what I said.”
“You implied it,” Armir replied. “You do not think she can survive without you beside her.”
He started to answer, then closed his mouth. Did he think that? Nay. The truth was that he was so terrified of losing her that he couldn’t bear to think of her fighting the witches on her own.
“Ah,” Armir murmured. “Now I see what you mean. I would suggest being very careful with how you speak because Helena might not think you believe in her.”
Jarin lifted his eyes to the black sky above them. “My options are to stand with her and take the chance that the Coven will use me against her. Or, I can let her go on her own and hope that she wins, but also come to terms with the fact that she might die. And I would never be there to hold her or say my final farewell.”
“Aye,” Armir answered. “Neither is a good choice, but this is about more than just you and Helena. This is about the Varroki and even all those living without magic. We have fought the Coven for thousands of years to ensure this moment never happened.”
“Yet, here we are.”
“Aye, yet, here we are. It is the choices we make at this time that will either put us in the position to win or allow the Coven the foothold they are trying to grasp.”
Jarin drew in a deep breath and looked at Armir. “No matter what, I’ve lost Helena.”
“She knows what is at stake. She will not allow herself to fall into the Coven’s hands. For you, for our people, and for the rest of the world, she will do what is right.”
Because he couldn’t. Jarin’s heart hurt at the thought. He had found something so amazing, so wonderful...and he was about to lose it all. If he didn’t already hate the Coven, he would now. The little time he’d had with Helena wasn’t enough. It was just a taste of what could be his, and he ached for more.
“Am I being punished because I did not care about what laws were in place? Is it because I desired her so much that I only thought of myself and what it felt like to be in her arms?”
Armir blew out a long breath. “If you are being punished, then so am I. We cannot help where our hearts lead us, or the feelings that develop. I wish there were another way for you and Helena.”
No one wanted that more than Jarin. He ran a hand down his face, suddenly weary to his core. He looked around, only just realizing that Helena had been gone for some time.
Jarin jumped up and anxiously looked around the stones for some sign of her, hoping that she had returned and paused to listen to their conversation. Because the alternative was too much to contemplate.
Armir joined him in the search, and soon, they were outside the boundaries of Stonehenge with no sign of Helena.
Jarin strode inside the circle again to where Andi was perched nearby. Valdr had gone with Helena, which meant that he couldn’t ask the wolf to track her. But Andi could find them.
“Find Helena and Valdr,” Jarin requested.
The bird stared at him silently, her intelligent eyes unblinking as she remained.
“Please,” he begged.
Armir came up behind him and put a hand on his shoulder. “Even the falcon knows what needs to be done. Take comfort in knowing that Valdr is with her. The wolf will protect Helena.”
That was his job. Jarin turned away, feeling helpless and furious. He spied his staff and grabbed it as he once more went outside the stones.
“Jarin,” Armir called as he followed. “What are you doing?”
“Whatever I need to do.”
Just as he was lowering the tip of his staff to the ground to use a spell to determine which direction Helena had gone, Armir shoved it aside.
“She left because she knew you would not leave her,” Armir stated. “And if you think for a moment that it was easy for her, then you know nothing.”
Jarin frowned as the realization hit. “You knew,” he said through clenched teeth. “You knew what she planned while we talked.”
“I suspected,” Armir corrected.
“And you didn’t tell me.”
“Had you watched her face, you would have seen it yourself. There is nothing more she wanted than to remain with you.”
Jarin took a step away from Armir. “I’ll find her.”
“Then you will destroy any chance she has of succeeding. Have faith that she will return to you.”
“When was the last time you fought the Coven?” Jarin demanded. “Three years ago? Or was it longer?”
Armir’s face tightened. “You know I left to avenge one of the warriors killed by a Coven member.”
“You face one witch every few years. I battle them daily. I faced off against the elders and other witches like Sybbyl who got hold of powerful artifacts. Do not presume to tell me Helena’s chances against them. I know much better than you.”
“Then think of Helena. If the situations were reversed, would you not want her to accept your decision? Would you not do anything to keep her safe? Even if it meant confronting the Coven on your own?”
Jarin turned away, hating that Armir was right. “I should be with her.”
“We both should. Every witch and warlock should. But we cannot. This is Helena’s battle. She wants and needs to decide her own fate. She might not have chosen to be descended from the First Witch, but destiny has forced her to shoulder the responsibility of choosing a side.”
“What am I supposed to do in the meantime?”
“Continue doing what you always do.”
Jarin faced Armir once again. “If you were in my place, would you be able to let Helena go?”
“I’m honestly not sure.”
“I hope you never have to find out.”
Armir’s shoulders sagged. “I envy that you got to experience what it is like to hold the woman you long for. I dream of it every night but, honestly, I do not know if I would be strong enough to let her go.”
“I will never stop fighting for Helena,” Jarin declared. “I will never stop hoping she’ll return to me. And I will never stop hunting the Coven.”
19
Sybbyl stared ahead into the inky blackness of night. Somewhere out there, Helena hid. The witch somehow knew she was after her, but Helena would only get so far. Sybbyl was quickly gaining ground. It was just a matter of time.
It took a great deal of magic for her to move herself, not to mention the three witches with her, across miles in a blink of an eye. But it was worth the pain it caused to catch up to Helena so quickly.
She wanted the witch on her s
ide, but Sybbyl was well aware that after everything that had occurred between Helena and the Coven, the witch might refuse.
Sybbyl anticipated that along with the thought that Helena would go down fighting. That would simply never do. Sybbyl would have to come up with some way to hold Helena captive and get her with child. Once the babe was born, there would be another descendant of the First Witch, and Sybbyl would have no need of Helena.
She could kill the witch and raise the baby as her own, which meant that the Living Heart would then belong to her and the Coven just as the Staff of the Eternal did.
Sybbyl knew it wouldn’t be easy to hold Helena and get her with child. But with magic, all things were possible. She just had to find the right spells. Once she had something to focus on, Sybbyl was as tenacious as they came.
She was so focused on her chase that she was surprised by Avis’s sudden arrival. The other witches were just as shocked to see the witch.
“What are you doing here?” Sybbyl demanded. “I sent you out to find the warlock.”
Avis gave a shake of her head. “He is not an easy one to locate, but I was able to track him.”
“Here?” she asked.
The witch nodded.
Sybbyl narrowed her gaze as she resumed looking into the distance. What were the odds that the warlock and Helena were together? Things couldn’t be that easy for her.
Could they?
Sybbyl smiled and glanced at the staff in her hand. It was all thanks to one object that everything she wanted was falling into place so easily.
Then she paused, her head jerking to Avis. “How did you find the warlock?”
“It was a spell my mother showed me long ago. I cast it, searching for magic different than my own. It is similar to a locator spell, but since I do not know the person, I look for magic instead.”
Sybbyl walked to the witch and smiled at her. “What did you find?”
“Strong magic, unlike anything I have ever seen or felt before. We can feel when a witch does magic, but I sensed nothing in the locations I visited.”
“How do you know you are heading in the right direction?”