With Brendan momentarily disoriented, Jen raised the pan high in the air and sent it crashing into the back of his head.
A second later, his unconscious body crumpled to the linoleum floor.
Gasping for air, she staggered backward, still clutching the pan.
Jesus. Oh sweet Jesus.
Had she killed him?
No. No, she could see his chest rising and falling. He was breathing, then.
“Jen! What the hell is taking so—oh my God.” Annabelle came to a dead stop in the doorway.
“So much for sticking to me like glue,” Jen said in a wry voice.
Annabelle glanced from Jen’s face to Brendan’s body slumped on the floor, then spoke in a brisk tone. “Did you call the police?”
“Not yet. I was too busy fighting him off.”
“Well, you did a good fucking job. Carson would be proud.”
Jen felt shell-shocked as she watched Annabelle call 911. When the cops showed up fifteen minutes later, she relayed the events that had transpired with a measure of calm she certainly did not feel. Her heart continued to pound. Her hands shook. Lingering adrenaline coursed through her veins, making it impossible to focus on her surroundings or the people around her.
Brendan regained consciousness while one of the uniformed officers handcuffed him, but he remained oddly subdued as he was being carted away. He’d been arrested for assault and violating the restraining order, and Jen supposed she’d have to see him in court at some point, but she couldn’t think that far ahead at the moment.
What if she hadn’t grabbed that pan in time? What if Brendan…had done what? She had no clue what he’d planned on doing. All she knew was she could have been seriously hurt. Or worse.
“You okay?” Annabelle asked after the cops left.
Jen gave a tired nod. “I’m fine.”
“We should put some ice on that eye.”
Eye? Oh, right. It took a second to remember that Brendan had struck her, and once she did, she registered the pain throbbing in her left eye. She reached up to touch it, and discovered that her eye was nearly swollen shut. Probably explained why half her vision was blurry.
Jen sank onto the couch and took an unsteady breath. She needed to call Cash and tell him what happened. Over voicemail, of course, because she knew his phone wouldn’t be on. But she longed to hear his voice. She desperately wished he were here right now, holding her in his arms.
But he wasn’t here. He was…well, she didn’t know where he was.
God, she wanted him to come home. She didn’t want to be alone. Didn’t want to think about what just happened with Brendan, or how differently the situation could’ve turned out if she hadn’t gained the upper hand.
Damn it, Cash. Come home.
* * *
Almost home.
Those two words had been buzzing in Cash’s head for the past seven hours, and he was so anxious for the chopper to land that he couldn’t stop tapping his foot relentlessly and drumming his fingers on his thighs. He’d seen Carson displaying the same jittery eagerness countless times before. Come to think of it, Becker, Ryan and Matt did the whole foot-tap/finger-drum thing too.
Was it a relationship thing? Because their single counterparts, Dylan, Seth and Jackson, looked perfectly at ease as they chatted over the din of the rotors. Cash hid a surprisingly smug smile at the realization that he was officially part of the no-longer-single camp.
Shit, he couldn’t wait to see Jen. He’d missed her something fierce.
He gazed out the window, his pulse racing as the San Diego skyline came into view. The sun hovered over the horizon line, filling the sky with brilliant shades of pink and orange. Made for a damn pretty sight, and he wondered if Jen had ever seen the sunset from a helo. If not, he’d have to take her up sometime. After all, he did have that pilot’s license he hardly ever put to use.
“I’m serious, this girl is a royal pain in the ass,” Dylan was saying. “I don’t know what my brother sees in her.”
Cash shifted his gaze to the seat across from him. Dylan had been griping about his older brother’s new girlfriend for the past ten minutes, and Seth, who was sitting next to the guy, finally rolled his eyes and said, “We get it. She’s a shrew. For the love of God, can we talk about something else?”
“Fine. Let’s talk about the chick you had over last week,” Dylan said. He shot the other men in the chopper a grave look. “I slept with the door locked and a knife under my pillow. No joke—I was seriously worried she might murder me in my sleep.”
Seth grinned. “Don’t be an ass. Lisa’s a cool girl.”
“She had a face tattoo, man. And out of curiosity, is there any part of her body that isn’t pierced?”
“Nope.”
Cash chuckled. Seth had the most eclectic tastes when it came to women. Sometimes he went for the shy, fragile ones, other times it was the hardcore goths, then he’d switch it up and date a supermodel, followed by a plain Jane. The guy had no problem sampling every dish on the menu.
As Seth and Dylan’s banter continued, Cash glanced at Carson, who’d been quiet for the entire flight. A helo ride without Carson’s sarcastic remarks was weird, but Cash understood the lieutenant’s somber mood. As far as he knew, Holly still hadn’t moved back home, and Carson being gone for the past three days probably hadn’t helped the situation.
After the chopper touched down on the base, Cash said goodbye to the others and practically sprinted to the parking lot, with Ryan hot on his heels. Since he’d left his car with Jen, he had to rely on Ryan to drop him at their building. Luckily, Evans seemed as eager to get going as Cash did. They were on the road in five minutes flat, and while Ryan drove, Cash grabbed his cell phone from the glove compartment and turned it on. Probably made him a total pansy, but when he saw the missed call and message from Jen, his heart did a dumb little flip.
He punched in the pass code for his inbox, desperate to hear Jen’s voice, even if it was via voicemail. Two minutes later, his desperation transformed into a burst of white-hot rage.
“Goddamn it.” He slammed his hand on the dash so hard he was surprised the airbag didn’t deploy in his face.
Ryan looked over sharply. “What’s wrong?”
“Fucking Psycho McGee attacked Jen.”
“What? I thought he left town.”
“Apparently he came back. The asshole showed up at Jen’s apartment, muscled his way inside, and fucking attacked her.”
His hands curled into fists. Jen had assured him in the message that she was okay and that Brendan had been arrested, but that didn’t stop Cash from wanting to murder the son of a bitch.
“Is she all right?” Ryan asked.
“She claims she’s fine.” He clenched his teeth. “But who the fuck knows.”
Ryan sped up without needing to be asked. With the Jeep’s top down, the wind hissed in the front seat and slapped Cash’s face as the scenery whizzed past his peripheral vision. The closer they got to their building, the angrier Cash felt. At Brendan. At himself.
Before he could stop it, a rush of guilt flooded his body and tightened his throat. Fuck. Fuck. He should’ve been here to protect her. Jen hadn’t said much in the message, and she certainly hadn’t sounded accusatory or upset with him, but Cash was upset with himself. What kind of man couldn’t protect the woman he loved?
“Get out here,” Ryan said briskly as he slowed down in front of the building. “I’ll park the car.”
Cash was out of the Jeep before it came to a complete stop. He still wore his dirty fatigues, his boots were caked with dirt and sand from their three-day stint in the desert, but he didn’t give a shit about his appearance. He sprinted up to the second floor, his pulse drumming in tune to his hurried footsteps.
Worry and rage mingled in his blood to form a cocktail of nerves. Jen had said she was okay, but if so much as a hair on her head had been harmed, Cash was going to rip Psycho McGee’s throat out, even if he had to break into the bastard’s ja
il cell to do it.
“Jen!” he called when he dove through the front door. “Sweetheart, you here?”
No answer.
His heart jammed in his throat. Had she left? She’d said she and Annabelle were heading back here, but granted, the message had been left hours ago.
What if she was gone?
What if she’d changed her mind about being with him?
Cold reality splashed him in the face as he realized he wouldn’t blame her at all for that. He hadn’t been there for her when she’d needed him. And wasn’t that the crux of her no-military thing? That she wanted a man who’d fucking be there?
When he entered the living room and found it empty, Cash’s heart sank to the pit of his stomach. A quick peek into his bedroom revealed another empty room.
So that was it. She wasn’t here.
“Cash?”
He spun around to find Jen by the bathroom doorway.
For one long moment, he was frozen in place. He focused on her swollen left eye, already a ghastly shade of purple. Her lush mouth, pursed in a worried frown. Her long blonde hair falling over one shoulder.
“You’re here,” he breathed in relief.
She cast him a strange look. “Of course I am.”
Cash yanked her into his arms and held her so tight he heard her gasp for air. But he couldn’t help himself. She felt so small and fragile in his arms. He breathed in the sweet feminine scent that was uniquely Jen, and his heart lurched.
He pulled back and gently stroked her cheek, right beneath her swollen eye. “Fuck,” he mumbled. “Oh, fuck, Jen. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” Her voice trembled. “It looks worse than it feels.”
The sight of her black eye sent a bolt of anger up his spine. “I’m going to drown the bastard,” he hissed.
A faint smile played over her lips. “First of all, drowning is Carson’s thing. Second, Brendan was arrested, so I suggest we let the cops deal with him. And third—what are you doing home? I figured you’d be gone for longer.”
“I told you it was a minor op,” he reminded her. Self-recrimination poured into him, and he swallowed hard. “I’m sorry.”
Surprise flickered in her eyes. “Why are you sorry?”
The lump in his throat was so massive he could barely get a word out. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here,” he croaked. “I should’ve been here, but I wasn’t and look what happened—that son of a bitch hurt you.”
“Cash—”
His entire body burned with shame. “Go ahead and do it.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Break up with me. I wouldn’t blame you if you changed your mind about being with me.” Misery hung on his every word. “You were right—you need a full-time partner. A man who’s going to be there for you and protect you and—”
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
* * *
Jen gaped at Cash, wondering if he’d hit his head during his mission. Because he was talking like a crazy person. Kind of looked like a crazy person too, with that wild look in his blue eyes and the dark scruff covering his face. She’d been so happy to see him when she’d walked out of the bathroom and spotted him in the hall, but the more he babbled on about breaking up, the unhappier she became.
“No, I’m not kidding,” he mumbled. “I wasn’t here for you, and isn’t that what you were afraid of? That you’d be forced to handle everything alone? And you had to fucking handle being assaulted! Holy hell, I should have—”
“Jeez, cowboy, would you shut up already? Nobody’s breaking up with anybody.”
He faltered, a flicker of confusion replacing the feral look in his eyes. “No?”
“No.” She reached up to cup his chin, the stubble there abrading her palms. “It’s not your fault that Brendan showed up. If anyone’s to blame for this, it’s me, for not being more cautious when I went back to my apartment.”
Cash still looked dubious. “You’re not angry that I wasn’t there to protect you?”
“I protected myself just fine. And you know what? As messed up as this sounds, I’m happy Brendan showed up this morning. Now the cops are involved and they can deal with him. Besides, the whole encounter was proof that I can take care of myself. The self-defense training my family shoved down my throat paid off, and I got out of the situation with nothing but a black eye when it could’ve been a lot worse.” She smiled. “So no, I’m not angry with you. And hell no, I’m not dumping you. I was strong enough to deal with my psycho ex, and I’m definitely strong enough to be in this relationship with you.”
Before she could blink, Cash tugged her into his arms again and kissed her. His lips were firm, his tongue insistent, his beard growth prickly as it scraped her chin. The kiss robbed her of breath and made her heart pound, and when they broke apart, the relief in his eyes was unmistakable.
“You mean it, right? You’re okay that I wasn’t here when you needed me? Because it could happen again, sweetheart. The military is my life. I will be gone at times.”
She traced his mouth with her fingers. “I know. And I can handle that. We can make this work.” She paused. “And anyway, you won’t be the only traveling partner in this relationship.”
He cocked a brow. “Oh really?”
“Uh-huh. In fact, I’m flying to Lake Tahoe Wednesday morning. It’s just a day trip, but it still counts as travel, right?”
“Is this your way of telling me you got the job?” he teased.
“Yep.”
She yelped when he lifted her off her feet and hugged her. His happiness was contagious, making her forget about this morning’s terrifying showdown with Brendan and reminding her of all the incredible things she had going in her life.
“I knew you’d get it,” he said gruffly.
Her heart constricted as he bent down to capture her lips in another deep kiss that left her tingling in all the right places.
“I’m so damn proud of you,” he went on, sweeping his thumb over her lower lip. “I believed in you from the start, and I’m glad you’re finally believing in yourself.”
“I am,” she agreed. Emotion clogged her throat. “And even more than that, I believe in you, Cash. I believe in us.”
20
Carson paced Jen’s living room carpet, distress creasing his forehead. “What if she doesn’t come?” he said for the tenth time in the last five minutes.
“She just texted saying she’s on her way,” Jen reminded him.
He kept pacing. “What if she sees my car and realizes it’s an ambush?”
“You parked at the grocery store around the corner,” Cash spoke up. “She won’t see your car.”
“But what if she stops to buy groceries?” He sounded anguished. “Fuck. She’s not going to come.”
With a sigh, Jen rose from the couch and marched over to her brother. Cash stayed seated, watching her with an amused expression on his gorgeous face. For a second, she was tempted to go right back to the couch and kiss that sexy mouth of his, but she reined in the impulse. She and Cash had done plenty of kissing over the past two days—surely they could afford to take a short break to help her brother.
Clapping both hands on Carson’s shoulders, she fixed him with a stern look. “Chill the fuck out. Holly is on her way here. Any second now, she’ll knock on the door and—”
The knock came as if on cue.
Jen gave his broad shoulders a reassuring squeeze. “See?”
His Adam’s apple bobbed. “How do I look?”
She swept her gaze over his perfectly starched dress whites, the blond hair he’d slicked back with care, the clean-shaven jaw, and his familiar blue eyes, the same shade as her own.
“You look as handsome as ever,” she said softly.
Saying a silent prayer that Holly wouldn’t bolt the second she saw Carson, Jen walked to the front hall and opened the door. “Hey. Thanks for coming,” she told her sister-in-law.
Holly’s low ponytail fell over one dainty shoul
der as she followed Jen inside. “It’s no problem. You sounded so upset over the phone. I still can’t believe you broke up with Cash! I thought you said the two of you were—Carson?”
The brunette stopped in her tracks when she spotted her husband. She immediately turned to Jen with a wary look. “What’s going on?” She noticed Cash sitting on the sofa, and the wariness deepened. “You two didn’t break up, did you?”
Jen smiled sheepishly. “No.”
Carson took a step toward his wife, his nervousness clearly etched into his face. “Hey, Hol.”
Holly frowned. “Why are you in uniform?”
“I figured it was appropriate.” He shot her a faint smile. “I was wearing this uniform the night of Garrett and Shelby’s wedding, remember? When we ran into each other again after you abandoned me in a supply closet.”
After a beat, Holly smiled back. “I never thought I’d see you again after the club.” Her face glimmered with humor before going dull again. “But what does that night have to do with right now?”
As the pair eyed each other, Jen edged away, wanting to give them privacy. Cash did the same—he’d already risen from the sofa and was creeping toward the bedroom.
But her brother stopped them before they could make their escape. “Stay,” he said hoarsely. “I might as well grovel in front of an audience.”
“Grovel?” Holly let out a breath. “Carson, I don’t want to talk about—”
“I don’t want you to talk,” he said quietly. “I just want you to listen, okay?”
Holly hesitated, then nodded. She slid the strap of her leather purse off her shoulder and set it on the couch, but she didn’t make a move to sit.
Carson shifted his feet, looking more nervous than Jen had ever seen him. Finally, he cleared his throat. “I fucked up, Hol. I know I fucked up and I’ve been trying to find a way to fix this for months now. I was seeing a therapist—”
“You were?” Holly gaped.
He nodded. “I thought she’d help me figure out how to make things right between us, but arrogant ass that I am, I kept ignoring her advice. She went on and on about communication, and I was all, less talk more action. Like my whole let’s-have-a-baby idea.” He gave a self-deprecating smile. “Because having a kid is really the way to solve a problem, huh?”
Out of Uniform Box Set: Books 1-3 Page 71