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by Jackie Chanel


  I desperately tried to reassure Kat and Jerry that I had nothing to do with Eddie leaving. Eddie’s a grown ass man. If he doesn’t want to play at Rabbit’s, that’s his business. They can’t blame me for that. I just hope that in due time, Kat tries to understand that. If not, I’m screwed.

  Everyone in the band, except Joey, was hanging around the studio with me as I prepared to record for the first time ever in a real studio. My hands are sweating so bad, I don’t know how I’m even going to hold my damn guitar.

  “Man, this place is nice,” Mike whistled.

  The studio itself is huge! And equipped with the best recording devices imaginable. At first I was reluctant to touch anything until Mike, Paulie, and Eddie got there. Then we couldn’t stop touching stuff and fooling around with the equipment. I’ve never been in a recording studio before. This shit is incredible! I’m never leaving!

  “It’s not the best,” Sunny remarked. “I’ve been in better.”

  “What the hell were you doing in a recording studio?” Paulie questioned.

  “Probably with one of her talentless rapper boyfriends,” I guessed and by the look on her face, I’m right.

  “Who’s paying for this?” Erica asked.

  “Why do you always want to know about money?” I asked. “You’re just here to watch. Why are you worried about who’s paying for this?”

  “Well, I know you’re not paying for it,” she smiled.

  Lately, Erica has been flirting with me, like she never has before. I like it. On stage, it’s really hard to watch her play, but it’s even harder not to. She’s sexy as hell when she has her saxophone in her hands.

  I can’t think about Erica tonight. Tonight is way too important. I begged Sunny and Erica to stay home tonight. But they showed up anyway. Now that Erica is in my band, the two of them are like the Bopsey twins...inseparable and a huge distraction.

  Instead of looking directly at Erica, which always leads to a situation in my sweats, I stared down at the folded piece of paper in my hands...the songs for my demo. I originally had ten songs I wanted to record but Roxy laughed that idea right out of my head.

  “Ten songs? Are you crazy? No one puts out a ten song demo! Four songs,” she ordered. “Nothing over four minutes and no covers. I’m not paying for you to be in that studio forever. ” Then she hung up.

  Joey was right again. Roxy can be annoying as hell, but she’s good. She’s has me booked for gigs all over Georgia and Florida. I don’t think there’s a single date next month that I won’t be on stage.

  I don’t like the idea that she has me booked for gigs without my band but I can’t afford to play with them all the time now. Some of the gigs don’t aren’t paying me that much. I have bills. I can’t afford to split the little bit of money with three other people.

  But soon, I'll be making enough money to have them play at every show I play. Especially now that I’m going to have a decent fucking demo. We’re going to be making a shit-ton of money.

  I glanced at the paper again. Roxy’s good but even with the old demo she hasn’t been able to get me a record deal yet. Everyone is saying that once the new demo is finished, I’ll definitely get a deal. I hope so. I’m tired of being broke.

  “So, what’s the song lineup tonight?” Erica asked.

  “Don’t know yet. We’ll see what Joey says when he gets here.”

  “I really think Empty Kisses should be on the demo again,” Sunny stated. “And No is a Four Letter Word, and Race Against Time and put Life Unexpected on there too.”

  “And Parachute,” Erica inserted her two cents. “Oh...and Don’t You Dare Leave. You gotta put that one on there.”

  “I can’t put all of those songs on there,” I told them. “Some of those are written for the band.”

  “So,” Sunny shrugged. “Everyone is here and Joey’s on his way. Play with them.”

  “It doesn’t work that way,” I told her. “This is a demo, not my CD.”

  “Explain how that works, please,” Sunny said with a little too much irritation in her voice.

  “I’m not explaining that to you again,” I told her. We’ve already discussed this.

  I’m a solo artist. I have a band, sure, but my name is going to be on the CD. It’s going to be my signature on the record deal, no one else’s. Erica, Mike, Eddie, and even Joey when he’s around, work for me. If that’s too hard for Sunny to understand, I’m not going to keep reminding her.

  Joey came into the studio with some dude named Curtis that he introduced as the audio engineer. The three of us went into the control room while everyone else stood around the studio doing nothing.

  “The equipment here is better than what you got at home,” Joey said. “We’ll do a few takes and see how you sound. You got your songs together, right?”

  I nodded and handed him the list. Immediately he pulled out a pen and started crossing out songs. He handed me back the paper and I saw that he had crossed out all of my favorite ones.

  “What’s wrong with these?” I asked.

  “Nothing’s actually wrong with them. But they ain’t goin’ on this demo,” was his answer.

  “You ready?” he asked. “Time is money.”

  I gulped and nodded.

  “Get your friends out of the studio and let’s get to work. We don’t have all night.”

  Four hours later, we’d only recorded two songs, but they were perfect. I had no idea I could sound so good on a CD. This is going to get me that deal.

  I know it is.

  Chapter 22

  “Aiden!” Erica yelled from the living room.

  The apartment was empty when I hopped in the shower. What is she doing here?

  “Yo A.T! Where are you?” she yelled again.

  “I’m in my room!”

  A few seconds later, Erica strolled into my room while I was drying off and sat on my bed.

  “Oops,” she giggled. “I didn’t know you were naked.”

  “Now you know,” I replied as I continued to towel myself off. “What’s up, Erica? What are you doing here?”

  She eyed me getting dress. Every time I looked up, she averted her eyes, like I couldn’t feel her staring me.

  “Ummm...ummm, why’d you cancel rehearsal?

  The lust in her voice was unmistakable. I guess working out with Sunny is starting to pay off. I grinned and turned around slowly.

  “You’re sitting on my jeans,” I told her. She jumped off the bed and shielded her eyes in embarrassment.

  “Don’t even try to act shy now,” I teased. “You weren’t so shy when you walked into the bathroom the other day when I was in the shower. You must like what you see.”

  Erica giggled but didn’t deny it, nor did she take her eyes off of me while I slipped on my jeans.

  “You’re not going to put on any underwear?”

  I shrugged and looked around the room for a clean t-shirt. I made a mental note to do my laundry in the next couple of days.

  “Don’t have any clean boxers,” I answered. “And I canceled rehearsal because I have to go to Valdosta and play at some student rally.”

  “You’re playing another show without us?” Erica raised both her eyebrows and her voice.

  “Yeah. What’s the problem?”

  “You have a band,” Erica snapped. “Why do you keep playing these shows by yourself?”

  “Roxy asked Mike to come with me,” I told her. “He said he had something else to do. Besides, I have to do what Roxy says. How else are people going to hear me play?”

  “We should be playing together,” she replied heatedly.

  I knew that when Roxy started getting me solo gigs, this was going to be a problem with Erica and maybe Eddie. Erica has to constantly be reminded that we are not a group. She is a saxophonist who plays in my band. That’s it.

  “We’re not a group,” I reminded her for the hundredth time.

  “So,” she answered sharply. “We’re friends though. I mean, damn, Eddie and Mike
quit steady paying gigs to play with you.”

  “I didn’t tell them to quit. I haven’t even quit playing at Rabbit’s,” I informed her. “I have bills to pay. It was a dumb idea for them to quit playing there.”

  Erica faced me slowly. The sultry sexy look that she usually has was gone. She’s infuriated.

  “That’s a fucked up thing to say.”

  “Yeah, but it’s the truth.”

  “That sounds like some shit that Roxy came up with.”

  “Why are you getting all pissed off? You’re still playing at Sambuca’s. You don’t see me getting all bent out of shape over that.”

  “Because you have a warped sense of friendship,” Erica snapped.

  “I’m the one with the warped sense of friendship?” I tried not to my temper get the best of me, but with Erica, it’s hard.

  “You’re the one pissed off over nothing! I’m the one who spent a fucking year playing at college parties and tiny ass coffee shops! I’m one who writes the songs! I’m the one who’s doing everything. When I make it, you, Mike, and Eddie benefit from it. So, if I have to play a solo fucking show every night, so be it. I’m a solo artist!”

  Erica nodded her head. “Okay, alright,” she muttered. “Keep that attitude and you’ll be solo alright.”

  She gave me the finger and stormed out of my room. I heard the apartment door slam shut. I can’t stress over Erica right now. I have a show to do.

  By myself.

  ****

  “Where the fuck is Aiden? He ditchin’ us again?” I heard Mike swear when I walked into Rabbit’s twenty minutes late for rehearsal the next day.

  “I’m right here,” I said. “Chill out, dude. What’s the matter?”

  “How was Valdosta?”

  “Fine,” I answered. “You should have come. I hooked up with this chick named Tracy. She was fucking hot! And bi! I’m bringing her up here next weekend to meet Julie,” I smirked. “Gonna see how that goes.”

  “You are so gross,” Erica frowned. “You’re goin’ to catch something before you ever get famous.”

  “I’m twenty-one and a musician. What the hell am I supposed to be doing besides getting laid?”

  “Somebody’s on her period,” Eddie commented. Erica swung her neck strap at him but he moved out of the way.

  “Why are we rehearsing anyway?” Erica snapped. “It’s not like you and Roxy actually want us to play with you.”

  “What the hell did I walk in on?” Joey’s southern drawl called out. “What’s the matter with baby-girl?”

  When Joey walked into the main lounge, all the tongue wagging, bickering, and complaining stopped. Hell, we even stopped moving. Whenever he walks in the room with us, it’s like “Daddy’s home” even though he’s only a few years older than Mike.

  “She’s mad because I had a gig last night by myself,” I told him.

  “Or she’s mad that you hooked up with a lesbian before breakin’ her off with the goods,” Mike laughed.

  I shook my head at him. He‘s going to catch hell for that comment as soon as Joey is out of earshot. Erica is going to let him have it.

  Joey put his case down and sat on the stage next to Erica.

  “What’s wrong, baby-girl? Why you mad?”

  “I’m sick of them,” she complained. “Plus, all we do is rehearse. We don’t do shit together. Why are we rehearsing?”

  “We’re rehearsing because you don’t know all of Aiden’s songs and you gotta learn them or else we’re all gonna sound like shit at Essence and I’m not going to let any of you make me look bad.”

  All eyes turned to me. I looked at Joey. What is he talking about?

  “Have you talked to Roxy today?”

  “She called. I was busy.”

  Joey gave me his infamous “stop your shit” look that I’ve grown used to. I certainly saw it enough while we were on tour.

  “If you had answered your phone, then you’d know that you’ve been invited to play at the Essence Music festival next month.”

  I dropped my guitar back in the case. “What?”

  “You heard me. Roxy got the call last night.”

  He’s not serious. He can’t be. The Essence Music Festival is one of the biggest African American music festivals in the country. It’s the best gathering of musicians I’ve ever seen in one place. They’re all black though. There hasn’t been one white guy playing at the festival in forever.

  “They asked for me?”

  “Yeah, some guys from Coca-Cola heard you play in Chicago. They talked to some people who talked to Roxy and it’s a done deal.”

  I gulped in a mouthful of air. “What the hell am I supposed to play?”

  Joey laughed. “It’s not like you’re going to be on the main stage,” he answered. “We’re playing whatever the hell you want.”

  “So we get to go with him?” Erica asked rudely. “For what?”

  “Erica, chill the fuck out!” Eddie yelled. “Did you not hear what the man just said? We’re playin’ the Essence Music Festival.”

  “Yeah, but they didn’t ask for us,” she continued to bitch. “They asked for Aiden.”

  “So what,” Mike said. “We play Essence, we all get paid, and it’s the fucking Essence Music Festival. Will you please take some Midol and get over the bullshit. You should be happy, girl.”

  “All of you can kiss my ass,” Erica snapped.

  “Baby-girl,” Joey interrupted. “This is Aiden’s thing. We’re not a group. We play with him when he needs us,” he told her.

  “That’s what we been trying to tell her,” Mike said. “She doesn’t listen.”

  “Aiden’s the one who does all the work,” Eddie added. “All you gotta do is play your damn sax and get paid. Stop trippin.”

  “All I’m sayin’ is-”

  “Let the boy do his thing,” Joey said. “We all benefit from it. You’ll see.”

  Even with the thought of playing at the Essence Music Festival taking up most of my brain, I like the idea of my friends being along for the ride. I like the confidence that Joey has in me.

  I’m playing at the Essence Music Festival. This is big time. If this doesn’t get my parents’ attention, nothing will.

  Chapter 23

  I thought playing the Tybee Island Blues Festival changed the course of my life. That was nothing compared to the Essence Music Festival.

  Essence Music Festival. Even when I read the reviews of my show and I know that they’re talking about me, I still can’t believe that I played the fucking Essence Music Festival.

  Three whole days of music, food, sex, more music, and more food.

  I have no complaints. Not a single one.

  My show was perfect. I couldn’t have asked for a better performance. Joey, Mike, and Eddie played their asses off. Erica was phenomenal. She had the men in the crowd eating out of her hand.

  I didn’t even have to play blues songs the entire show either. With Joey’s help, we modified, Don’t You Dare Leave, No is a Four Letter Word, and Parachute to give them a more soulful sound. I loved it. When I get my record deal, that’s how I’m going to record them.

  I’m happy to be back in Atlanta because I’m still getting positive reviews from the show. I impressed the people that matter and then some! My YouTube videos have the most views than any other videos that Sunny and I have posted. People want to see me play. They’re waiting for my album. I need a record deal and quick.

  ****

  “Sunny,” I bent over the couch and whispered in her ear. I hate waking her up but she’s on the sofa and I have company.

  Sunny’s eyes fluttered but she didn’t open them. “You smell like a brewery,” she groaned.

  “Go get in your bed.”

  She shifted on the couch and went back to sleep. Behind me, Tracy poked me in the small of my back.

  “You said we were going to have the place to ourselves.”

  Sunny opened her eyes at the sound of Tracy’s voice. She glared at me.


  “Another one, Aiden? Where’d you find this one?”

  Sunny’s reactions to the girls I bring back to the apartment are nothing but nasty. I can’t help the fact that she’s initiated the “Great Penis Embargo” and doesn’t want to date since her precious Gavin went back to rehab.

  I’m a guy. I can’t help the fact that I get a lot of girls. Where else am I supposed to bring the ones who don’t have their own place?

  “I’m Tracy,” Tracy announced and stuck out her hand. Sunny stared at it like it was covered in boogers.

  “Whatever,” was Sunny’s response as she rose from the couch. I followed her to her room and sat on the edge of her bed while she curled up under the covers.

  “What’s wrong with you?” I asked.

  “You’re disgusting,” Sunny stated. “You’re not even a celebrity yet. Your dick is going to fall off before you even get a record deal.”

  I laughed. “Why are you pissed?”

  “Because it’s gross, that’s why,” Sunny insisted. “Have you talked to Erica or Roxy today?”

  “No. What’s up?”

  Sunny sat up. The moonlight through her window blinds made everything look blue. Expect her eyes. Sunny’s eyes are full of worry and something else that’s equally disturbing…

  Fear.

  “I’m going to take over for Roxy for awhile,” she whispered slowly. “She’s really sick.”

  “What?” I don’t know what surprised me more, that Roxy ‘s sick and no one had bothered to tell me or that Sunny is going to be handling my career. Neither one of these things sound good.

  “She has ovarian cancer, Aiden.” Sunny’s eyes glistened with tears. I pulled her trembling body into my arms.

  “Sunny, she’s going to be okay,” I whispered. I don’t know how true that statement is or if Sunny believes me. I don’t know if I believe myself.

  Roxy has cancer.

  She’s the last person I’d ever envision as sick. She’s so feisty, so tough. Why would this happen to her?

  “She’s had it for years,” Sunny answered without me having to ask the question. “It’s been in remission for eighteen months. But it’s back and she’s going to start treatment again. Erica’s scared as shit. You need to call them, Aiden.”

 

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