by Jenny Frame
Wendy closed her eyes and mentally kicked herself. She thought after being away, living and learning, that she wasn’t such a pushover. Obviously she needed to be on her guard.
Wendy sighed and opened her eyes. “Okay, Ki, I hear you. I am attracted to her, I admit, but I’ve heard what you’ve said and I’ll be careful.”
“It’s just because I love you, Dee. I don’t want you to be taken for a ride again the way Bailey did,” Kira said.
“I promised myself that I wouldn’t let anyone into my heart again, and I won’t.”
Kira frowned. “That’s not what I’m asking for, Dee. I want you to meet someone nice and have the family you’ve always wanted. I know that’s part of your dream. Family, teaching, writing children’s books—just choose wisely. No damaged people for you to put back together.”
Wendy thought about the excitement she felt when Trent spent time with her and the children and how her heart ached when Trent was open and showed her feelings. It was too dangerous, and it had to stop.
“I can’t trust myself, Dee.”
* * *
Trent finished flicking through the year-old car magazine in the doctor’s waiting room and sighed. You would think that with the fortune they charged you here, they could buy some up-to-date magazines.
She put it back on the coffee table in front of her. The décor in this doctor’s waiting room was similar to her lawyer’s office. Old oak furniture with green leather seats, expensive paintings, and the secretary’s desk in the corner looked as if it was taken from an English country house.
Trent made a mental note to ask India to make sure they always had up-to-date magazines in her office from now on. It occurred to Trent that both she and the good doctor here catered to the same clientele.
The doctor’s secretary, an older woman, must have seen her fidgeting, because she came over and asked, “Would you like another coffee, Ms. Trent?”
“No, thank you.”
She looked at her watch. Alice had been in there with Dr. Trevino for forty minutes so far. Trent wasn’t frustrated because she was bored waiting, but she was anxious for Alice being in there alone without her. It was a new and strange sensation to feel so protective over a child.
Just as she was about to stand up and pace, the office door opened and Alice emerged with Dr. Trevino, her cheeks tear-stained.
Trent stood up immediately and held out her arms, and Alice ran to her.
Trent was on alert. What had this woman said to Ali?
“Ms. Trent? May I have a word?” Dr. Trevino said.
“Of course.”
Trent bent down and said, “Stay here. I won’t be a moment.”
* * *
On the walk back to the car park, Trent tried to digest everything the doctor had said. Alice wasn’t making progress. Dr. Trevino explained that Alice felt out of control without the strong parental figure her father was. She felt responsible for Noah and that was too much on her young shoulders. Alice wouldn’t deal emotionally with the post-traumatic stress until she had that strong parental figure behind her as a safety net.
Trent had no choice. She had to do something, or this little girl was going to have far more emotional problems as an adult than she did.
When they got into the car, Alice lifted the contract they had signed. “You said I didn’t have to go back, and I don’t want to.”
What could she do? Leave this to Wendy to sort out? No, she couldn’t do that. Dr. Trevino said that Alice needed a strong parental figure, and despite her trepidation, that was what she had to be.
“I will always honour a contract, and if that’s what you want, I won’t make you come back, but let’s take a drive first, maybe—” Trent racked her brain. “Maybe get an ice cream?”
“Ice cream?”
“Yes, that would be a nice treat before we go home, wouldn’t it?”
Alice nodded. She looked unsure at this turn of events.
“I think there’s an ice cream parlour in Fortnum & Mason—”
“McDonald’s.”
“McDonald’s?” Trent said with surprise. “The hamburger place?”
Alice nodded vigorously. “It’s my favourite. Daddy used to take us there.”
Trent was dubious about a hamburger shop’s ice cream, but if that was what Alice wanted…“Okay, McDonald’s it is.” Trent spoke to her satnav. It pulled up the nearest McDonald’s drive-through, and they made their way there.
It was an experience for Trent. She had never negotiated a drive-through before, and Alice had to instruct her at each stage.
They parked and Alice handed her one of the ice creams.
“So this is your favourite?” Trent asked.
“Uh-huh.” Alice licked her ice cream. “It’s soft.”
Trent hesitantly took a taste. She was pleasantly surprised. “Not bad.”
There was a silence while Trent thought about how to talk to Alice. Strong, steady, parental figure, Dr. Trevino said, but that was easier said than done.
She remembered some advice Wendy had given her near the beginning of their time together, and that was to share her own story of grief. Could she do that?
“Ali? I know you don’t want to talk—I understand it.”
“How can you understand?” Alice said a little sharply.
Tell her, Trent mentally nudged herself. “I lost a parent as a child too.”
Alice looked surprised. “You did?”
Trent hesitated. She had to do this for Ali.
“Yes, I was eight years old when my mother died. She had cancer, but I didn’t know that at the time. I thought she was in bed for a long time because she was ill and would get better. My father was a gruff, frightening man, and he never told me anything. He was more concerned with his business and—”
She wasn’t going to explain to Alice about her nanny and her father.
Alice had stopped eating her ice cream and was listening intently.
“Then one day she wasn’t in her room any more. She was just gone and I didn’t understand.”
“Were you scared?” Alice asked.
This was so new, admitting to these feelings, but she didn’t have to worry about Alice’s judgement the way she would with an adult. Plus, Alice understood her pain.
“Yes, terrified. I didn’t believe she was dead. I thought all the adults around me were lying. Even at the funeral, I kept demanding to know where she was. I thought it was all one big lie.”
“What happened?”
Trent touched her scar. “I was punished, and I learned not to talk about it. As I grew older, I accepted what had happened to her, but my resentment and bottled-up grief made me shut down my emotions and have difficulty relating to people. I’ve only realized that recently, and I’m nearly forty.”
It felt so good to say this out loud.
Alice looked out the car door silently. “You think that will happen to me?”
“I hope not, but I want you to know that things are different for you. I had no one to lean on. You have me, and I promise you will have me as long as I live, Ali. I’m your godmother. That means I took an oath before God to look after you.”
Trent held out her hand in offer to Alice. Alice took it and said, “I want to talk.”
* * *
Wendy looked at the clock for what felt like the hundredth time. She was in the kitchen having just finished preparing Saturday night dinner, and Noah was drawing at the coffee table in the living area.
It was long after Trent and Alice should have been home, and Wendy was worried. She had already sent two texts and gotten nothing back. She didn’t want to phone and give Trent the impression she didn’t trust her alone, so she waited and waited.
What if Alice ran off? She was so vulnerable when she went to her therapist. Finally her phone beeped and she grabbed it off the counter.
We’re on our way. We stopped for ice cream and had a talk. Ali is exhausted.
Wendy pushed her braids behind her ears nervously. She was wor
ried about how Trent had managed their talk. Was Alice exhausted because she was upset?
She walked over to Noah and said, “Hugs, Noah?”
He didn’t need to be asked twice. She hugged him tightly and tried to calm her worry.
“Will Ali be home soon?” Noah asked.
“Very soon, sweetheart.” She kissed his head.
Wendy always cared for the children in her care—she had a lot of love to give—but Alice and Noah were different. She was truly falling in love with them. It probably wasn’t professional how much she cared, but they had no mother and no father and they needed her. It was going to be so hard leaving them when it came time to go back to university.
Wendy waited and waited for Trent and Alice to return. She sat with Noah as he watched TV. Then the doorbell rang.
She got up quickly and hurried to the door. When Wendy opened it up she found an ashen faced Trent holding a sleeping Alice. She could tell by Alice’s puffy eyes that she had been crying.
“What happened?”
“We went for an ice cream and had a talk.” Trent indicated with her head down to Noah who had appeared at her side. “I’ll tell you later.”
“Is Ali okay?” Noah asked worriedly.
“Ali’s fine,” Trent said, “just tired, that’s all.”
Wendy ushered them in. “Let’s put her to bed.”
Trent carried Alice through to her bedroom and laid her down. “I’ll let you get her undressed,” Trent said to Wendy.
Then she was off like a shot. Wendy’s heart broke looking at Alice’s tear-stained face. She must have made a breakthrough with Dr. Trevino.
Once she had Alice settled, she said to Noah, “Why don’t you watch TV in your room for a while, Noah. I’ll give you a shout when dinner’s ready.”
“Okay,” Noah said and ran to his bedroom.
Wendy wouldn’t normally encourage him to watch so much TV, especially on his own, but she wanted to talk to Trent alone.
She walked from the bedroom to the family room and saw Trent standing on the balcony with a glass of whiskey, just staring out in space. The doors to the balcony had never been open since she and the children arrived. There was a key, but she knew that the social workers had demanded locks be fitted and the key kept in a safe place.
Wendy walked over to the doors of the balcony and gulped. She couldn’t go any further—she was afraid of heights. “Trent? Can you tell me what happened?”
Trent looked around and Wendy saw tears in her eyes. It took her by complete surprise. Her heart made her take a step out onto the balcony and take Trent’s hands.
“Could you stand by the door and tell me? I’m afraid of heights,” Wendy said.
Trent nodded, finished her drink quickly, and moved inside the doors. Wendy didn’t let go of Trent’s hands and had to stop herself from hugging her.
“Tell me what happened,” Wendy said softly. She didn’t want to spook Trent.
“The doctor asked to talk to me. She said that she was getting nowhere with Ali, and that Ali needed to feel safe. Needed to have the strong parental figure, like her dad, standing with her, before she would ever open up.”
“You,” Wendy said.
“Yes. I had to think on my feet as to how I could get through to her—then I remembered your advice to tell her about losing my mother. So I took her to McDonald’s for an ice cream, and I told her.”
Trent started to tell Wendy the same story. She felt safe with Wendy and now that she had shared it with Alice, the words came a lot easier.
“There were things I didn’t tell Alice, like how I got this.” Trent pointed to her scar.
Wendy took a step closer. “Do you want to tell me?”
Trent looked into Wendy’s eyes and didn’t hesitate. “Yes. Part of the memory I didn’t know until recently. I had been sitting with my mother and she started to struggle with her breathing. I ran downstairs and burst into my father’s office, which was a big no-no, and found him in a compromising position with my nanny.”
Wendy gasped. “While your mother—”
“Lay dying upstairs, yes. I froze, confused and terrified. My father was a frightening man. He grabbed me and wanted to punish me for bursting into his office.”
Trent was no longer present. She was a bystander as her mind rolled back the years to that memory.
She watched tears roll down her own face as a child as her father demanded she hold out her hands. Then he took the birch that hung by a leather strap on a hook on his office wall. Her younger self shook with fear while Nanny Wilson watched coldly behind her father.
“You must never tell anyone about this, and never barge into my office again, do you understand?”
Trent’s stomach churned as he struck the birch down onto her younger self’s hands. It was harder, she remembered, than any of his other punishments, presumably because of what she had interrupted. It became so hard and violent that Trent pushed her father and ran as fast as her legs could carry her.
Trent was back with Wendy. “I ran right into the sill of his office door, knocked myself out, and woke up with this head injury. All these years I only just remembered being punished but not what for. Having Alice and Noah here brought all these memories flooding back.”
Wendy reached out and touched her fingers lightly on her scar. Trent jumped at first, then felt heat spread all over body. She liked this comfort.
“You poor thing. I’m so sorry you had to go through that,” Wendy said.
Trent covered Wendy’s hand with hers. “It’s nothing to what Alice has gone through.”
“What did she tell you?” Wendy asked.
Trent recounted Alice’s story in graphic detail, and as she did Wendy got closer and rested her head on Trent’s chest.
“I don’t care if this isn’t appropriate,” Wendy said.
Trent wrapped her arms around Wendy and held her close. “Me either.”
They held each other like that while Trent finished Alice’s story. “She was trapped, and she had David’s blood all over her. It sounds like something from a nightmare.”
Wendy pulled back from her with tears in her eyes. “We have to look after them.”
Trent nodded and wiped Wendy’s tears away with her thumb. “You and me. I don’t know what I’d do without you, Wendy.”
She couldn’t help but lean into Wendy and kiss her lips. After a second Wendy responded to her kiss and opened her mouth enough for Trent to trace the tip of her tongue along Wendy’s lips and dip inside her mouth.
Trent was lost in the kiss, as if all her hurt and pain from today was eased by Wendy’s tender lips. She lowered her hands to Wendy’s buttocks and pulled her to her pelvis. Her sex was wet and her clit pounding harder than she could remember in a long time.
Wendy moaned into her mouth and then pushed her back saying, “No, Trent.”
Trent stopped immediately as the spell was broken. “Wendy?”
“We can’t do this. We’re both very emotional, it’s understandable, but it’s not right.”
It wasn’t right? It felt right and that was all Trent cared about. “Wendy, it doesn’t matter what’s right—”
“It does,” Wendy said sharply. “You’re my boss and the children could see us. Let’s forget this happened, okay?”
Trent knew she couldn’t forget about it. But she didn’t want to scare Wendy off. She wasn’t going to be the boss who made unwanted advances.
“Okay. If that’s what you want,” Trent said.
“It is. I’m proud of you for getting through to Alice. I’ll just go and check on dinner,” Wendy said.
Dinner? The way Trent’s body was feeling she would need alcohol and lots of it to numb her aching want.
Chapter Fourteen
All through dinner, there was a tension between Trent and Wendy. Wendy could have slapped herself for kissing Trent only hours after having her heart to heart with Kira and promising she wouldn’t fall for Trent’s vulnerability.
That’s what Trent was showing when Wendy listened to her story. Seeing such a commanding woman showing hurt and vulnerability was exactly what made Wendy reciprocate Trent’s kiss. She couldn’t fight it, and yet she must.
Wendy looked up from her plate of food and found Trent gazing at her. She flicked her eyes away quickly and concentrated on what Noah was talking about. Maybe she had come back to Britain too soon? Maybe she hadn’t healed as much as she thought she had?
One thing was for certain, one kiss from Trent was so much more thrilling than any of the lovers she had while out of the country. Trent was ridiculously sexy, and Wendy could have controlled herself if she had stayed her moody, gruff self, but she was changing and growing beautifully, which made her irresistible to Wendy.
They had to talk. Annoyingly Trent made herself even more attractive after dinner. Alice was glued to her now that they had shared something so emotional. Trent was becoming her strong parental figure, just as the doctor had suggested.
At bedtime Alice insisted Trent escort her to bed, and the pair held hands until the girl fell asleep. As Wendy passed the bedroom she thought that it was so much easier to resist the distant Trent.
After settling Noah, Wendy went to her room to wait until she could talk to Trent. About nine o’clock, Wendy knocked on Trent’s office door. When she walked in, Trent jumped up from her seat and looked upset. “Let me talk—let me talk before you hand in your notice.”
“Hand in my notice? I—” Wendy said with confusion.
Trent walked around the desk and pulled out a chair for Wendy. “Please sit and let me talk for a moment.”
Wendy was confused. Trent looked genuinely panicked and ran her hand through her short salt and pepper hair.
“I want to apologize for kissing you earlier,” Trent said. “I realize how it must look to you. I’m your employer, I’m fourteen years older than you, in a position of power, and I made advances towards you. Before you consider leaving, please know that I was in an emotional state earlier and that I felt there was something growing between us recently.”
“I kissed you back,” Wendy said.