It's All Relative

by S. C. Stephens

  Sighing as he shuffled to the bathroom, Kai shook his head. Surely his dad would have told him something as important as that before sending him out to work for the man. Maybe Mason was just trying to not show favoritism to the rest of the team. Maybe he just didn’t want to appear that he was doing Kai any special favors. Kai shook his head as he turned the shower water on, twisting it to super hot. Mason was definitely not treating him with any special favors. Kai hoped today would be smoother.

  He also hoped the hot water didn’t aggravate his tender sting spots. Quickly undressing, he gritted his teeth and stepped into the stream. He flinched slightly at the odd sensation of hot water entering the slight pricks in his skin, and then sighed as the water relaxed him. The steamy water was nearly as soothing as Jessie’s miraculous fingers. Smiling wider, he remembered her hands over his skin. Running a bar of soap over his body, he closed his eyes, imaging the feel of her soft fingers trailing over him. It had felt amazing…wrong, but amazing. And he swore, for a moment there…it had been more than just a massage. He swore that for a second there, a single thought had entered both of their minds. A thought involving bare bodies, tangled limbs, slippery oils…and a spacious bed.

  As his mind took over and his fantasies took flight, Kai started pretending that his hands were hers. The act of cleansing himself nearly forgotten, he started tracing lines and curves in his muscles. His body instantly started reacting; warmth, blood, and a growing ache surging to his groin. He bit his lip, knowing he should stop this, knowing he shouldn’t think about her that way. Putting the soap away, he rested his head against the shower wall. He’d let himself get carried away, and his body was now completely hard, completely ready for a woman who wasn’t even around. A woman he couldn’t ever have again. He sighed again, sadly.

  Ignoring the ache, he washed his hair. He kept his hands nowhere near his waist and forcibly shifted his train of thought. He tried shifting to the marvelously thoughtful objects she’d brought over for his place. The stupid, but charming, camel, the really nice waterfall photo that painfully stoked memories of home, a few nice smelling candles, to help mask the scent of “bachelor,” and that one amazing picture of a red-rocked river.

  The river picture had sort of surprised him. Kai had a special connection to water, and the photo, that so perfectly captured the movement and aliveness of a rushing stream, blew his mind a little. By the warm glow in Jessie’s eyes, he’d known that the picture meant something to her, and she’d given it to him anyway.

  After he’d accepted the overly gracious gifts with as much humility as he could, she’d gone and put them away for him, decorating his home so effortlessly, that it seemed the place had always looked that way. She was so good to him. In two days, she’d seen everything that he’d been missing, and without asking, stepped in and took care of it for him. He was blown away by her.

  His mind shifting to her warm heart did nothing to drain away the need surging through his body. By the time he was rinsing all of the bubbles off, his situation below hadn’t improved any. Sighing again, he looked down at himself. Shaking his head, he muttered, “You’re not helping anything, you know. We can’t have her.”

  Smiling that he was actually having a conversation with his throbbing manhood, he smirked…and considered. He was alone. He could satisfy the ache that was only growing with the mere thought of it. He could close his eyes and let himself believe it was her, let himself believe they were nothing more than strangers, that he could have her, over and over again.

  His hand came out, his fingers barely brushing over the stiff shaft. His body twitched at the contact and his breath increased. He could let himself do this. He could satisfy his own needs, moaning her name over and over until he came. It would be clean, neat, efficient, and no one would have to know that he was pleasuring himself to the image of his cousin.

  The fingers circling around himself stopped and cursing internally, he shut off the shower. No, he couldn’t. While it’s true, no one would know but him…he would still know, and he’d feel slightly even more ill every time he looked at her. Besides, knowing himself, he’d start doing it every morning. Then every evening. Then he’d be doing it all the time…and he wasn’t sixteen anymore.

  Finished getting ready, Kai decided to surprise his grandmother with a decent breakfast since he had the time. A part of him wished he could surprise Jessie with a nice breakfast too, but he couldn’t really show up at her house unannounced yet. Not with her having roommates. Especially roommates that had been checking him out on that night. They may have been a little tipsy, but they had probably watched the two of them making out on the dance floor.

  As Kai hopped on his Honda, a surge of disgust and desire cropped up. Jessie sure had been hot that night. Aggressive, passionate and lustful. As he kick-started the bike, he wondered if that’s what being in a relationship with her would be like? She was definitely drunk while they’d been together, but that intensity had to be there, buried under the surface. Revving his engine, the warmth of the machine warming his thighs, Kai let himself wonder if he could stoke that desire in her, completely sober. His body starting to respond to that thought, and he cursed again. Squealing out of the garage, he let the feeling of flying down the pavement clear his mind.

  He seriously had to stop that.

  As he headed to an open bakery that he’d spotted on the way home yesterday, he shifted his mind back to Jessie’s roommates. He really hadn’t paid too much attention to them at the club - Jessie had absorbed all of his focus - but he recalled there being two of them. One with dark hair, one with red hair…if he was remembering it correctly. He knew they were protective of Jessie, since they’d speedily swept her out of his room almost immediately after…

  But Jessie swore they didn’t know that she’d gone home with him. If they truly didn’t remember him, remember everything he’d done with his cousin, then meeting them should be okay. Jessie seemed reluctant about it. She hadn’t said it, but he got the feeling that she’d prefer it if he never met her roommates. Maybe she was just nervous, worried that they’d piece too much together. Or maybe she was embarrassed to be seen with him.

  He laughed in his helmet, shaking his head as he pulled into the parking lot of the bright and cheery shop. No, he may affect her in strange ways, but he was pretty sure he didn’t embarrass Jessie. He frowned. Well, what they’d done probably embarrassed her. He’d give her that. It embarrassed him too. No one ever mentions that maybe you should be careful who you sleep with, not just for pregnancy and STD reasons. No one ever mentions that the world is microscopic, and that fate is one cruel bitch. No one ever mentions that the hot girl shoving her hand down your pants and her tongue down your throat, might be a family member.

  Twenty minutes later Kai was walking into the hospital. He’d called yesterday at work and Gran was getting out sometime today. Her fractured hip would need lots of rest but she looked good, all tests showing that she was healing well, and they were letting her go back to her life. Knowing his gran, she’d be knee-deep in potting soil by the afternoon. Tough old broad.

  The nurses smiled widely at him as he entered. Ever thankful of the wonderful care his gran was receiving, he’d bought a box of donuts for them, and they gave him swift hugs and told him she was awake if he wanted to surprise her. After a kiss on the cheek by a sprightly older woman named Susan, who eyed him oddly, almost like she was planning his future in her head, he ducked into his grandmother’s room.

  She was propped up in her bed, reading glasses nearly falling off her nose as her gnarled hands clicked and clacked the knitting needles Kai had brought for her. Her aged hands flew over patterns they had obviously repeated so many times that she could probably maintain them in her sleep. The result of all of the miraculous, repetitious movement was a blanket, flowing down the side of her bed in a myriad of bright colors. Kai smiled as he watched the progression, a little amazed at how a seemingly chaotic series of events, could result in something so beautiful.


  The older woman smiled when she noticed his entrance. “Kai, dear,” she said warmly. “I’m so glad you came by.”

  He shook his head at his grandmother. She could be in a body cast, head to foot, pain in every limb and joint, and she’d still smile warmly and say she was glad to see him. Tough…yet sweet, old broad. “Good morning, Grandma.”

  She patted the bed beside her as she set down her needlework and glasses. “You seem tired, sweetheart. How are you holding up?”

  Kai frowned, thinking he actually looked better today after a decent amount of sleep last night; even the slight sickness that Jessie had thought was related to the different altitudes had lifted. Immediately switching his face to a smile, he leaned down and kissed the woman’s head before sitting beside her. “I’m great, Gran, don’t worry about me.” He set a muffin down on her side table. It was blueberry, with some sort of incredible-smelling crumble on the top of it. Grabbing her hand, he stroked her fingers with his thumb. “You just worry about you.”

  She dismissed his comment with her free hand, at the same time smiling at what, he hoped, was a thoughtful meal choice. “Nonsense, nothing to worry about with me. But you…?” Her eyes gave him a penetrating, calculating examination, almost like she was looking for something specific in his expression. He tried to keep a pleasant smile on his face, not wanting her to see any of the turmoil in his heart lately. She slightly raised a gray eyebrow. “How are you doing…with everything?”

  Kai smiled wider. “Like I said, great.” He leaned in for emphasis. “Jessie is taking great care of me,” he added. A flush heated his cheeks after he said it and he swallowed nervously, hoping his skin tone covered it. He shouldn’t react that way to only her name, but, there it was.

  Gran tilted her head at that, but didn’t seem to catch his odd reaction. Instead she asked, “How was your first day at work? Do you…like it there?” She narrowed her eyes, seemingly intensely anxious about his answer.

  He cocked an eyebrow and then shook his head, figuring that, just like his mom, she was merely hoping he adjusted well to everything, and was curious about how he was fitting in. Frowning as he remembered his boss’s odd reactions to him, Kai shrugged and said, “I think it went okay?” He again stopped his frown and threw on a smile. “I think I’ll like it there.”

  His grandmother studied his face for a moment more and then sighed, a slight smile coming to her lips. Kai smiled wider as she seemed to finally believe that he was doing okay. Patting his thigh, she said, “Well, that’s good, dear. I wouldn’t want your new job to be…unpleasant for you.”

  Kai absentmindedly scratched where a bee had stung his shoulder. “It’s not…”

  As Kai started thinking back over his day, his grandmother brightened even more, sitting up a little. Kai caught the flinch in her face as a twinge of pain must have gone through her, but couldn’t comment on it, as her next question froze his tongue. “Did you meet my nurse, Susan? Lovely girl. I tried to set you up with one of her daughters.”

  Kai’s eyes widened. The “girl” he’d met in the other room was named Susan. She’d made sure he’d known it, as she’d excitedly taken a maple bar from him. The woman had to be his mother’s age, at least, but to Gran, he supposed that was still young. Huh, he hadn’t even been here a week yet, and his grandmother was already trying to fix him up. This could be a problem, if he didn’t put a stop to it right away.

  Finding his voice, he muttered, “I appreciate the thought, Gran, but I can find my own dates.” True, his last may have ended up being related to him, but at least he’d found her himself.

  She gave him a look that clearly indicated that she did not believe he was capable of such a thing. “Well, no need to worry, she only had boys.” She laughed in short, bubbled bursts. “I tried to throw them Jessica Marie’s way, but she gave me the exact same look you just did.”

  Kai forced a smile, but looked away. He really did not like the idea of Jessie going out with some random guy Gran set her up with. Then again, he didn’t particularly like the thought of her going out with anyone. He frowned slightly. She’d have to one day…and he’d have to come to terms with it.

  Skin that felt paper thin reached up to touch his face. Turning his head, he caught his grandmother’s worried eyes. “You alright, honey?”

  Sighing, he shook his head again. “Of course.” Biting his lip for what he was about to say, he told her, “I was just wishing that I could be home with you today, to take care of you once you leave here.” He hated lying, and while he actually did feel that way, his thoughts were nowhere near there when she’d asked. Whether or not the sentiment was true, it still felt like a lie, and he hated that. He frowned a little more.

  Gran took his face as concern, and tried to forcefully turn his frown into a smile with her finger. “You just go on to work and have a good day.” Kai smirked at her gesture and she added, “If it makes you feel any better, Jessica Marie is going to be with me for most of the day. She works the later shift on Tuesdays.”

  Kai’s frown deepened, as he realized that he wouldn’t be seeing his cousin tonight. Interesting that he’d already gotten used to seeing her on a daily basis. If he were honest with himself, he’d already been looking forward to an unexpected knock on his door this evening from her. His heart sunk a little that that wouldn’t happen. Idly, he considered her offer of showing up at her work…

  Gran patted his thigh again. “Now, you don’t fret over me. Jessica Marie is a fabulous caregiver. I swear, sometimes that girl frets more over my happiness than her own.” She sighed. “At least she got smart and dumped that…boy she was seeing.”

  Kai looked up from where he’d been studying the aged woman’s hand in his own. Her skin seemed so frail and fragile in contrast to his. It was almost startling how different their hands looked, one on top of the other.

  His eyes going to her small frown, he bunched his brows together. “Jeremy?” Kai couldn’t quite keep the contempt out of his voice when he said that name. He wasn’t sure what all had happened between him and Jessie, but he knew that the man hadn’t been faithful to her. That made him a lowlife in Kai’s book. A very stupid lowlife. Jessie was amazing.

  Gran nodded, seemingly happy that Kai knew a bit about Jessie’s past. Kai didn’t plan on ever mentioning just exactly how he’d found out about him either. “Yeah, that one was a piece of work. I never did trust the hoodlum.”

  Kai smiled and nodded at his grandmother. Something about her not liking him made happy butterflies lift Kai’s belly. He looked down briefly as his brow bunched together. That’s sort of an odd feeling to have.

  Confused, Kai shook his head and made a show of checking out the time on the wall. “Sorry, Gran, I should go.” He gave her apologetic eyes, but really, he sort of needed to leave, to get back on the road and clear his head. Today, he was really looking forward to the long, peaceful drive to work.

  His grandmother nodded, pulling his body towards her so she could kiss his cheek. “Of course, dear.” She pulled back after their long hug, once again giving him an odd, appraising look. “Have a good day at work.”

  Kai stood up, running his hands over his jacket, and gave her a breezy smile. “I will.” Pointing at her sternly, he added, “You take it easy when you get home. No tree climbing or anything.”

  She laughed at him and he leaned in for another quick hug. “I’ll wait at least a week for that.”

  Kai laughed and shook his head. “You better.” Pointing at the oversized muffin he’d brought for her, he said, “Make sure and eat that before the nurses steal it. I brought them donuts, but you never know.” He gave her a teasing wink and she promised that she would.

  Kai walked into the hall, looking back at the door to see her smiling and shaking her head at him. Kai silently wished her well for the day, and twisting to leave the hospital, silently wished himself well. Hopefully he could get through the day without being stung…again.

  **************

  As Mi
llie was finally snuggling on her couch back at home, she thought about her visit with Kai this morning. It was sure sweet of the boy to bring her a decent breakfast. Her stomach had been too queasy to eat it, but the thought was all that mattered. Even if he’d had the unfortunate fate of being that woman’s son, her own had raised him right. Kai was a thoughtful gentleman.

  Millie sighed, hoping his real father didn’t do anything stupid and foolish to break the boy’s heart. By his reaction when she’d asked Kai about his first day, Millie knew that he still wasn’t aware of his paternity. She hoped it stayed that way; that path would do nothing but hurt her grandchild. And he was hers, regardless of bloodlines.

  Millie was eager to protect that generous heart as much as she could. And as much as she knew the love of family would help him get through it, if he ever did learn the truth, she knew that the intimate nature of a romantic love would help him get though it even more. While she and Jessica could give him familial love and support, a woman could give him physical love and support, in a way that they couldn’t. If need be, he could take out his parental frustrations by lovemaking all day long.