by Susan Hayes
She tracked his footfalls as he circled around to the shelter’s entrance. It was barely wide enough for him to crawl inside. He toed off his boots and removed his bulky outer jacket before easing himself past the fire, setting his gear out to dry. While he did that, she shifted over to the newly expanded part of their makeshift bed, giving him more room to move.
“You going to be okay so close to the wall? It might be colder that far from the fire.”
She downed a big drink of the scotch, then took a deep breath and did the bravest thing she’d ever done in her life. She lifted the blanket in invitation. “I’ll be fine. I’ve got you to keep me warm… don’t I?”
His ice-blue eyes blazed as he prowled over to her on his hands and knees, every inch a predator. He didn’t stop until they were face to face, his eyes locked on hers, his breath a warm whisper against her lips. “Yes, my beautiful Tabi, you do.”
She waited for him to kiss her, but he didn’t, not at first. Instead, he drew a roughened finger down her cheek and along her jaw until he reached the point of her chin. Then, he drew her head up kissed her gently, a tender touch of the lips, nothing more.
Something deep inside her cracked at his gentleness, and she burrowed into his arms with a soft sigh that welled up from the depths of her soul.
As if that was the sign he’d been waiting for, his next kiss was hungrier. He ran possessive hands over her skin, the heat of his touch a delicious contrast to the lingering chill in her limbs.
He took the cup from her and then teased her lips with his until she opened her mouth to him, letting his tongue slip inside to dance with hers. Heat blossomed between them, hotter than a blacksmith’s forge. He smelled like the forest and tasted like sin, and she wanted more.
He broke away just long enough to strip off another layer of clothes, snarling in frustration with the lack of room to move. He managed to remove his sweater before he lost patience and tore his undershirt in half and shrugged out of the tattered remains.
She had her hands on his chest before the shirt hit the ground. She needed to touch him, to feel the hard planes of his body under her fingers. She’d fantasized about him for years, and part of her still didn’t believe this was really happening. The rest of her didn’t care if it was real or not, so long as they got to the good part before she regained consciousness. Reality was overrated, anyway.
9
This was not what he’d intended. He’d had a firm word with himself and a carefully laid out plan. Get warm. Have some scotch. Tell Tabi his theory on why she was struggling to control her shifts. Then, snuggle up and maybe, just maybe, steal a few kisses before they fell asleep. That plan had lasted about as long as tissue paper in a hail storm.
He craved her like a junkie craved his next hit, devouring her with a single-mindedness that bordered on obsession. He was grateful she was already naked, because it was hard enough for him to get out of his clothes in the limited space of their shelter. By Bast’s whiskers, he’d manage it somehow.
She had more curves than he’d imagined, her hips and belly cushioning his weight as he leaned over her, mouths locked, hands roaming over each other with fevered need.
She wanted this as much as he did.
He jerked open his pants before his erection tore through the zipper on its own, and she uttered a soft moan of approval as her fingers found his shaft. Firelight played over her face, painting her in shades of flame that matched the blaze burning in her dark eyes.
He shifted his weight, needing to get closer to her, but his head hit the roof of the shelter and he paused to recalculate. After an achingly long second and a half, he broke their kiss and rose up enough to free her from beneath him.
For a moment, doubt filled her beautiful eyes and she withdrew her hand.
“Oh,” was all she said, but it tore through his heart like an eagle’s talon.
“Hey, this is a strategic pause, not a retreat. Adequate room to maneuver is a bit of a challenge, that’s all.”
Her smile came back, as bright as the midday sun. “Oh! I thought…”
He didn’t let her finish. “You thought wrong. There is nowhere else in the world I’d rather be right now, and no one else I’d rather be with.”
She cupped a hand behind his head and pulled him down for another kiss, taking the lead for the first time. He liked it. He’d never had a librarian fantasy before, but he sure as hell had one, now. He wanted to see her all buttoned up prim and proper when they got back just so he could release the wildcat he knew she had hidden inside.
He rocked his hips against her soft curves, every part of him on fire with the need to have her. It almost killed him, but he waited until she ended their kiss before he spoke. “Roll onto your side, facing away from me.”
Her brows creased, but then she smiled delightedly as understanding dawned. She rolled onto her side, sweeping her hair under her head to expose her neck and shoulders. He spooned in behind her, pressing open-mouthed kisses to her bare skin. He slid an arm over her to cup one breast in his hand, drawing the nipple up to a tight nub with a few sweeps of his thumb.
She shivered and arched against him, sending a fresh surge of blood south to his cock. He loved watching a woman in the throes of passion. It was a better high than anything he’d ever experienced, and he’d experienced a hell of a lot in his life.
He continued to toy with her breasts until she was panting softly and her cheeks were flushed with colour. Only then did he let his hand drift lower, skimming over her soft belly and down to her thighs. He slid his fingers down as far as he could reach, coaxed her leg up and back and moved his thigh between hers. He guided her gently, until her limb was draped over his.
He trailed his fingers back up her leg slowly, enjoying the way her breath caught as he neared the apex of her thighs. She was slick with need already, arching herself into his hand as he palmed her sex and slid one long digit between her folds.
She trembled and moaned, and it was all he could do not to give in to temptation and take her then and there. Instead, he learned the shape of her, discovering her secrets and memorizing every centimetre of her body as he touched and teased.
Within minutes, he had her on the brink of orgasm, but he forced them both to wait. He wanted this to be memorable for both of them, because he already knew that this wouldn’t be the only time he had her in his arms, naked and needing.
He waited until she was whimpering softly before he slid two fingers inside her and pressed his thumb to her clit, sending her spiralling into a release that made her entire body jerk and shudder. She covered her mouth to smother a cry.
He wanted everyone in camp to know she had given herself to him. She was his, and he’d rain Hell down on the next idiot who gave her a second’s grief.
He was so out of his head he almost forgot about protection, both he and his furry side grumbling as he reached for his pack and rummaged blindly until he pulled out one of the condoms he always carried.
Tabi laughed when she realized what he was doing. Unlubed condoms were a staple in survival kits. In his shows, she’d seen him use them in sorts of interesting ways, including making one into a slingshot for bringing down small prey.
“Don’t laugh. This is the first trip I’ve actually used one of these for their intended purpose.”
The look she gave him was pure female satisfaction. “Good.”
He settled the broad head of his shaft at her entrance. “Say yes to this, Tabi.”
Her eyes glowed and she nodded eagerly. “So much yes.”
He entered her slowly, giving her body time to adjust. Not that he needed to, she felt like she’d been made for him. She arched against him, taking him deeper, and the last threads of his control snapped. He surged into her from behind, holding her in place with his arms as he buried himself in her heat.
She moaned his name, soft and breathy, and his cock jerked at the sound. Her inner walls tightened in response, and they were off, racing each other to the pinnacle
of pleasure. He loved the little sounds she made as he claimed her, the scent of her arousal blending with the evergreen boughs and wood smoke to create a perfume as heady and intoxicating as the finest wines.
Every touch, every taste brought him closer to release, though he was determined to hold back until Tabi had found hers. He could feel her trembling, and when she tried to cover her mouth this time he wrapped his fingers around her wrist so she couldn’t muffle her cries of ecstasy. Not this time. “I want to hear it when you come.”
“But the others…”
His next words spilled out before he knew what he was saying. “They’ll be able to tell by our scent come morning, anyway. You’re mine, Tabi, and I want them all to know it.”
Her body pulsed around him as her orgasm bloomed, and whatever she was going to say was lost as she gave voice to her pleasure. He looked forward to having that argument with her later. Much, much later.
He managed to hold out for a few more strokes before his own release overtook him and he lost himself completely in the moment. He held tight to Tabi, curling his body around hers as he rose to a shuddering climax.
He kissed her shoulder and she stirred, turning her head to smile up at him, her mouth still swollen from his kisses. She was flushed, glowing, and breathtakingly beautiful.
“I can’t believe we just did that.”
“We did. And we’ll do it again, too.” He leaned down to kiss her. “As many times as you say yes.”
“Really?” Her smile turned devilish. “In that case, I have something to say. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Oh, and also, yes.”
“You’re very cute when you get sassy. You should do it more often.”
She pressed her lips together and managed to look prim and haughty despite the fact she was naked and mussed from their recent romp. “Librarians aren’t supposed to sass. We are quite proper, thank you.”
His thing for buttoned-up librarians was rapidly intensifying into a full-blown fetish. “I like you prim and proper, too, but I think you're even sexier when you’re bratty.”
Her smile faded. “I used to be like that more often. But then… well, you’ve seen what happens when I let my emotions get the best of me. I guess I’ve been trying to stay really grounded. No highs or lows. Just meditation and exercise so I can stay level.”
He eased out of her, taking a moment to dispose of the condom and retrieve a travel pack of wet-wipes from his bag.
“That’s not part of the standard kit,” she commented as he handed her one of the towelettes.
“For this trip, I decided to cheat a little.”
He settled in beside her so they were face to face. “I’ve got a theory about what triggers your shifts. I don’t think your emotions are the problem at all.”
“That’s what they told me at the academy. I need to stay calm until I find a way to reintegrate the two parts of my self.”
“The first time you changed to your new form, you were in a cage, right?”
She nodded. “They were prodding me with batons, trying to provoke a response.” She grimaced. “They got more than they expected.”
He stroked her cheek, remembered the scotch, and snagged the cup from its spot near the fire. He handed it to her and waited while she took a sip. “I’m sorry to make you revisit those memories, but this is important. Can you think of any time that you had an uncontrolled shift where you weren’t feeling scared?”
“What? Of course. Usually I’m angry, not scared.”
“Are you sure about that? That time with the card catalogue. What set you off?”
“Someone had drawn a rough sketch of a black unicorn with a sword strapped to her head and put it on my desk while I was reshelving.”
“That couldn’t have been all that happened.” She was too controlled for that to have been the trigger.
“Do we have to talk about it?”
“Do you trust me?”
She closed her eyes and sighed. “Yes.”
“Then tell me what else was going on.”
“I came back to my desk and found the drawing. I balled it up and tossed it into the recycling bin.”
“And?”
And while my back was turned, one of the cadets walked up and dropped a stack of books on the counter. I don’t know if it was deliberate or not, but it startled me and…” She opened her eyes and stared up at him. “I was more than startled, actually. It frightened me. I didn’t know anyone was there, and then, bang!”
“And the student with books, where were they after you changed?”
He already guessed the answer, but he wanted her to see the pattern for herself. “Behind the… oh! He saw what was happening and tried to hide behind the card catalogue.”
“And tonight, you were minding your own business when you were hit with a mini-avalanche of snow that destroyed your home and buried your things. You were attacked, Tabi. I don’t think it’s anger that triggers your shifts at all. Your new form was born as part of a traumatic event. So now, when you feel threatened, you shift to protect yourself.”
She stared at him, then huffed. “It’s not fair.”
His brain short-circuited, going from smug to confused so fast he could almost smell the synapses frying. “What’s that?”
“You.” She laid a hand on his bare chest and his confusion intensified as most of the blood he needed for thinking rushed south faster than a Canada goose at the first sign of frost.
“I’m not fair?”
“Sort of. I just think it’s entirely unfair that you’re hot, sexy, charming, and smart.”
“You forgot a few. Modest. Talented…” He waggled his brows. “Good in bed.”
“You’re amazing in bed, but I’m pretty sure you knew that already. As for modest? Nope. Your alpha-sized ego is the only thing keeping you from claiming perfection.”
He briefly considered being insulted by that, but… she wasn’t wrong. “Fair enough. But I think you like my alpha-sized… everything.”
She laughed again, then leaned in to kiss him. “I think I do, too.”
It was silent for a few minutes, then she asked softly, “If I’m just protecting myself, what do I do to make it stop?”
“Don’t try to stop it. I think that’s the real problem. If you feel threatened, you should shift and fight back. Before, your default was to run from danger. Now, you’re conflicted because part of you wants to stand and fight.”
She settled her head on his chest and sighed. “You make it sound so obvious. Why didn’t I see it before?”
“Because you thought it was about getting angry, which is understandable. Everyone else saw the problem through the same filter you did because it was the obvious answer. I’m not sure you’ve noticed, but I don’t have many filters.”
She uttered a soft little laugh that fanned across his skin. “I noticed.”
“Go to sleep, my little gothicus. Tomorrow’s going to be a busy day.”
He stayed awake long after Tabi drifted off, enjoying the peace of the night and the unfamiliar comfort of sharing his shelter. As he cradled his sleeping lover against his side, a quiet thought drifted through his mind. This might be what was missing from his life - someone to share the adventure.
10
She woke to the sound of birdsong and hushed voices. It took her a few seconds to remember where she was, followed by a full-body blush as she remembered who she’d spent the night with. Not that he was with her now. She was alone in their little lovenest, though judging by the freshly built up fire, Sergei hadn’t been gone long.
Her spare clothes were set out on top of her backpack. He might not have the best communication skills in the world, but sometimes actions really did speak louder than words. Her stuff was dry enough to wear, so she donned her inner layers, then crawled out of the shelter and finished dressing where she had room to stand. If the rest of the camp was awake, she needed to get ready. No way she’d be the reason they fell behind schedule.
It wasn’t long pas
t dawn, and the forest still held that sense of newness that came with the rising of the sun. Colours deepened, shadows faded, and everything smelled fresh and bright. All that was missing was the smell of coffee and this morning would be perfect. She sighed and wondered if there was a Tim Horton’s on the route back to the academy. She’d bribe the bus driver with everything in her bank account if he’d stop long enough for her to get a double-double coffee. A large one. Did they sell coffee in buckets?
It took her uncaffeinated brain longer than it should have to register the rising voices coming from the far side of the camp.
“When did it start?” Sergei was demanding in a voice that was pure alpha male.
“After midnight,” Guy replied weakly.
“It was those fucking MRE’s. They were disgusting, and now we’re sick!” Joshua whined.
Tabi trudged over to find out what was going on. She didn’t get far before her nose wrinkled and her stomach tried to curl in on itself. They were sick alright, and the proof of it was stinking up half the campsite. Gross.
Everyone was up and standing in a loose circle around Joshua and Guy’s shelters without getting too close. Not even Janice was braving the stench. She stood near Annie, her expression a mix of worry and annoyance.
Sergei stood between the two miserable cadets as they sat hunched outside their shelter. “You both ate your MRE’s last night?”
They nodded.
“And nothing else?”
Tabi saw the two of them exchange a look, and they both shook their heads. “Nothing.”
“Then we’re going to have to chuck the other meals. We can’t take the risk of anyone else getting sick.” He looked at the others. “Did anyone else eat theirs?”
Janice raised her hand. “Me. I had half of mine.”
“And how are you feeling?”
The coyote shifter shrugged. “I’m fine. That stuff was barely edible, but I don’t think it’s what’s making them sick.”
Joshua hissed. “Janice, don’t.”
The pretty blonde glowered back at him. “You think the rest of the group should lose their rations because you two idiots ate crap from a gas station vending machine? I told you it was a bad idea.”