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Back From Chaos Page 6

by Yvonne Hertzberger


  As they travelled through the forest that led back home they rode quickly, mostly single file. They had little opportunity for conversation. When not on horseback, Sinnath and the men ate cold meals and spent the short spans until morning rolled up in their blankets. But this gave Sinnath a lot of time to think. Those thoughts trod a dark path.

  Sinnath left Catania a deeply troubled man. He felt caught between two incompatible traditions. The first was loyalty to his rightful lord. Until now, nothing could have induced him to even consider breaking his vows of allegiance. The second held that all members of a conquered ruling family must be eliminated, so that they could not organize resistance. Gaelen had broken the second tradition.

  Sinnath’s reservations about Gaelen’s marriage to Marja ran deep. Her father, Lord Cataniast, had been treacherous and suspicious. Sinnath found it hard to accept that any offspring would be different. As the adage went, an apple does not fall far from the branch.

  He hoped he would find evidence of Marja’s treachery before it undid Gaelen. He believed Gaelen’s youth and inexperience blinded him to the woman’s beauty. She must not find an opportunity to subvert the supremacy of the House of Bargia. For now, Sinnath decided he would be vigilant. Evidence would no doubt present itself, if he just kept his eyes open. Perhaps Gaelen could still be made to see reason.

  So Sinnath kept his counsel and did not voice his misgivings to anyone along the way, not even to Janest. Janest had been a mentor to Gaelen for many years and could see no fault in him. He would not understand.

  But Sinnath did understand the implications of his line of thinking. His loyalty to Gaelen’s father had never wavered. He did not even think himself capable of treason … yet, here it was. If he acted on his doubts that is exactly what it would be.

  ~13~

  A WARY TRUCE

  Marja had wakened to sun streaming directly onto her face. With no drapes to cover the window slit, there was nothing to dim its effect.

  The room faced south, so she reckoned the time to be just before midday. As soon as she realised that she had slept longer than she had intended, she roused herself quickly. Knowing that the crucial interview with Gaelen was almost upon her, she took care to dress and groom herself. With no silvered disc to see into, she had to rely on touch to style her hair, so she kept it in a simple knot. It was really too dirty to do more anyway. After drinking some water she made herself eat the stale bread and cheese that was left. The honey and butter softened the bread a little. Washing it down with more water took the edge off her hunger so she felt more revived and ready to face what was to come.

  While she waited, Marja went over the conversation of the day before. Trust had been rare in Cataniast’s household. She had learned to be wary of promises and appeals for her understanding. Now her situation demanded she make a choice … to accept on trust that Gaelen’s offer was genuine … or to disbelieve him and see treachery in his strategy. Her training and experience told her she would be a fool to believe. Yet Gaelen’s direct manner and detailed reasoning had an air of sincerity that she found hard to ignore. Today she must choose. The choice would affect not only her own life, but those of the peoples of both Catania and Bargia. Making political decisions had not been part of her training. Her education and upbringing had focused on needlework, music and managing a household. As a woman of rank, she had expected to be sent off to an arranged marriage. She would not have been consulted.

  These thoughts turned over in her mind as she paced, wishing it were finished and at the same time wanting to flee from facing it. Part of her, the part that related to her old life, just wanted a bath, clean hair, and her ladies to share romantic dreams with. Much as she tried to banish that ghost from her mind, she could not completely extinguish the childish longing for everything to be back the way it was. She felt like she was two people: the girl she could barely remember and the woman she had not yet become. And now, circumstance required that she make that leap on her own, with no one to guide her and no time to learn. Her heart raced with both terror and excitement.

  After what felt like an eternity but was actually only a short span, the door opened, and the guards admitted a servant carrying a tray with ale, a bowl of hot stew, and fresh bread. The aroma of meat and vegetables tantalized her nostrils. Marja’s stomach growled in anticipation, reminding her how hungry she was. She made herself stop pacing and sat down. In very short order, she had emptied the bowl. Well, at least they did not intend to starve her. It tasted delicious.

  When the servant returned to retrieve the tray she told Marja, “Lord Gaelen sends word that he will meet with you anon.”

  So … he was coming, and she had made no progress with her decision. Panic set her heart pounding. Her hands prickled for a moment with the rush. How can I make such a decision without more information? With a mental shake she chided herself. Do you really believe you have a choice, silly girl? What you need to do is stay calm, listen, watch, and wait. Don’t let him see how confused you feel. A way to salvage something will present itself. He said he would demand an answer, but surely there would be time for some discussion first, something that would give her the clues she needed. She breathed deeply and forced herself to sit in the chair facing the door to wait, hands folded demurely in her lap.

  One of the guards knocked and quickly opened the door to admit Gaelen. It closed immediately again behind him. Marja rose, ready to face him, as she heard the bar slide back.

  Neither said a word for a long moment. She found herself appraising him. How different he looked today from the weary soldier who had presented his plan to her. He made an imposing figure, standing half a head taller than most. He had bathed and shaved. His hair, which had been tied out of the way yesterday, now gleamed in soft, wheaten waves almost to his shoulders. He had donned civilian dress: woollen breaches of dark brown, a linen shirt covering his broad shoulders and over that a belted tunic of soft, tawny suede that matched the colour of his hair and brought out his amber eyes. His boots and belt shone. Around his throat lay his torque of office, his only adornment. The simplicity of it suited him perfectly. For a moment, Marja felt again the shiver of excitement she had experienced when she had first seen him over the balcony so long ago. Then she caught herself. That dream belonged to another life. This was the man who had helped to destroy everything she had loved. She must not act like a romantic young girl.

  “My lady, I am pleased to see you looking much recovered from the privations of the last days. I hope you have rested and eaten well.”

  Marja took an aloof tone. “I have, my lord, though a bath would have been most welcome.”

  “I will have that remedied as soon as I leave. May I sit?” Gaelen asked.

  “It is not for a prisoner to deny a lord a chair. You will do as you wish.” She put more coolness into her voice than she felt and hoped it hid her nervousness.

  Gaelen sighed. “Think of yourself more as an honoured guest, lady.”

  Marja resumed her seat and Gaelen followed suit. She continued to regard him coolly as he continued.

  “I have with me a document detailing my proposal. I hope you will agree to it.” Gaelen indicated the sheaf of scraped leather he held in his hand. “Shall I read it to you? My scribe and two of my men wait outside to act as witnesses, should you agree to the terms.”

  “I am quite capable of reading it myself. All the women in my father’s house were taught to read and cipher. We were not kept ignorant.” Effrontery added to the ice in her voice. She hesitated before putting deliberate emphasis on, “My lord.”

  “Forgive me, lady. It seems I underestimated Lord Cataniast,” he apologized smoothly, handing her the document.

  “Indeed.” Her hands remained steady as she took it, the last traces of tremor stilled by anger. She began to read silently. Gaelen made no attempt to interrupt, neither moving to explain, nor soliciting questions. She could feel his eyes on her, but this was her turn. She knew he could afford to be patient. He
did have the upper hand after all. Soon she forgot him as she burned the conditions of his proposal into her mind.

  “This seems just as you presented it to me. I am required to swear allegiance to you, to recognize you as rightful lord of both Bargia and Catania, and to swear to uphold that right. In your turn, you offer me the position of wife and consort, and all the privileges that implies. Our children will become the heirs of both demesnes. As well, all citizens of Catania willing to swear allegiance to you may return to their lands and livelihoods with no penalties. Young men will be required to take training in your army and to serve in any campaigns you undertake. You swear to treat them no differently from the conscripts from Bargia … This appears a generous offer, my lord, but I have some questions.” Marja looked Gaelen in the eye.

  “Speak. I will do my best to answer them.”

  “It strikes me that any agreement signed by a woman, who cannot, by law, hold power except as regent for an heir, may be deemed to have no legal value. Why are we playing this game when you may have what you want merely by commanding it? It strikes me that the choice you offer is really no choice at all, but merely a formality to gain my compliance.”

  Gaelen raised his eyebrows at this, then nodded, understanding dawning on his face. She could almost see him reassessing his opinion of her. Good. She wanted him to realize that she was no fool. She hoped he was learning not to underestimate her.

  “Secondly, I need to know more about your intentions regarding the people of Catania,” Marja went on. “You are our conqueror. That puts us at your mercy.”

  “My third question concerns my own position. At this time I am locked in a solitary room. I have no contact with anyone, no access to information about how my people fare and no one to keep me company or tend to my needs. If I agree to your plan, how soon, and in what ways, may I expect that to change? What is meant in your agreement by ‘the privileges of wife and consort’ and how soon may I see those?” She waited with rigid poise as he considered his response.

  “It is true, lady, that there are some, possibly many, who will say our pact carries no formal weight. But I swear to uphold it. As lord, no one may gainsay me. Time will bear out my wisdom in this. The naysayers will be won over. I am confident of this. Yet I cannot offer you more than my word to convince you.” He paused to let her take this in before continuing.

  “I intend to offer the people of Catania all the same privileges and responsibilities that I afford those of Bargia, and rule them by the same laws, provided they swear allegiance to me. I will place some of my trusted men here, along with a contingent of soldiers, to see those commands carried out. Argost will head that group. I trust him completely to carry out his duties with wisdom and loyalty.”

  Marja kept her cool silence and let him finish.

  “As to your personal situation, I must be candid. To give you full freedom at this time would put your life at grave risk, something I am not willing to do. I assume you understand the wisdom in this. Eventually, you will have all the freedoms and privileges a lord’s wife may expect. I hope we may reach a level of trust that will enable me to discuss matters of state with you as a partner and advisor. I have already come to admire your astute grasp of politics. But that is for the future. For now you must remain under heavy, protective guard. We leave in a matter of days for Bargia. Before we do so, I hope to find two ladies to attend you. I have already made inquiries to that end.”

  When he was through he sat back and regarded her silently, appearing relaxed and confident. Marja wondered if that took as much effort as it did for her.

  She considered her reply carefully. “I do understand the need for caution. For the rest I must rely on your word. So I have no choice but to agree to your plan. However, my continued allegiance will, in some measure, depend upon how you make good on your promises. I am not a fool, and I will not be your game piece, now or ever. Betray me at your peril.” Her heart raced at her own audacity. To challenge a lord, especially one who could take your life with a mere word, was not prudent.

  A look of profound relief came over Gaelen’s face. He rose, saying, “I am pleased that you agree. With your leave then, lady, I will have my men enter to witness the signing.”

  Marja nodded, suddenly very tired.

  Gaelen admitted the three others, who took their places behind him. The scribe, Erland, set ink and quill on the table, stood behind her and made to show her how to make her mark.

  She waved him off, bristling with indignation. “I have no need of your assistance. I am quite capable of finding where I must place my signature.”

  Gaelen actually gave a low chuckle at this. “I think you will find the Lady Marja well educated, Erland.”

  Erland remained standing to one side as she took up the quill, dipped it in the ink and affixed her signature. Then she rose, and Gaelen sat to add his own.

  A clever move, she thought. It adds legitimacy to the document.

  Marja watched, as Erland handed Gaelen his seal and held a candle flame to the yellow wax. They all witnessed him place his official stamp on it. It was done. No ceremony had taken place. No official had spoken words over them. Yet they were joined, at least formally.

  “Thank you, gentlemen.” Gaelen rose. “Proclaim this to the people. See to it that all hear. They have a new lady.” Gaelen smiled, exuding confidence and power, as he handed the scroll to one of the guards. “Take this immediately to Argost for safe-keeping.”

  When the door closed, he turned to face Marja. He reached over to touch her face, and ran his thumb lightly down her cheek until it met the pulse at her throat.

  His touch sent a shock through her. Would he take her here and now? Is this what he intended? She forced herself not to react and stood stock still.

  When her racing pulse could not hide her fear, he withdrew abruptly, with a look of dismay and some irritation. “What is this? What do you fear so? Is my touch so abhorrent?” Then, his expression softening, he took both her hands in his.

  Marja jerked back, filled with a mix of fear and sudden fury.

  He took a step back and looked at her questioningly.

  Marja stammered, and she felt herself tremble slightly. “I had hoped for a little more time to prepare … my lord.” The words came out with effort. It was all she could do not to retreat behind the bed.

  His face grew dark. “What do you think me? That I am so filled with lust? Have I not told you I find rape distasteful? I have sworn not to harm you. Have you not believed a word?”

  “I have agreed to be your wife. That makes it rape no longer … my lord.” Unable to hold her rigid self-control any longer she began to shudder violently, staring at him with wide-eyed wretchedness, her knees threatening to buckle.

  Marja saw a look of surprise and sudden understanding cross Gaelen’s face, as if he knew what this was, had seen it before. His anger evaporated. “My lady,” he murmured, gently taking her shaking hands again, “I am no monster, to treat you thus. I could never do so. Nor am I your enemy. My intention was merely to show you a new beginning. I swore I would never harm you. Surely to force you to lie with me would do so. Wife you may be, but I swear to you that I will never force myself upon you … however much I desire you … and I do desire you.” The last was almost a caress, a soft, throaty whisper.

  Marja shuddered so violently that she felt about to fall. As her fear ebbed with the understanding that he had never intended to rape her, so did her strength. Suddenly she needed to sit down. He let her go, and she sank into the empty chair.

  After several moments her shaking subsided. When she once more had herself under control, Gaelen spoke again. “Lady, it distresses me to see you so. If you will permit, perhaps I may see you in private tonight, and we may make a better beginning.”

  Marja sensed something had profoundly changed between them. Somehow she understood, though she could not have explained why, that he was not her enemy. The cold core that had kept her strong melted, replaced by
a softer feeling that she was not sure she understood, except that it was much lighter than before. Perhaps it was hope … confusion? … desire? She could not make sense of it.

  Gaelen once more reached out to lift her chin so that he looked into her eyes. “May I visit you tonight, my lady?”

  Still unable to speak, Marja managed a small nod. He bent to brush his lips against her hair. When he withdrew, she felt she had lost something important but did not know what.

  “There is much that needs my attention before we leave for Bargia. I can stay no longer than a few days. But I will return tonight if I can. It may be very late, so please do not wait for me. I can see you are exhausted from the events of the last days. When I return … if you waken … perhaps … with your leave,” he seemed suddenly shy and his voice fell to a low murmur, “we may make a better beginning.”

  When she gave no indication that she objected, a slightly teasing smile crept into his eyes and over his lips. “I have earned a reputation as a skilled lover. There have been no complaints.”

  Marja managed a wan smile. ”What if I request more time … my lord?”

  He sobered instantly. “I shall not press you, my lady. But the people will wish to see the staining on our sheets before we leave for Bargia.” He must have read the dismay in her expression because he grew thoughtful and added, “There are other ways of providing proof. I will bring the blood of a fowl to use if it should be necessary. I should very much like to have you completely willing. You have lost much. I can be patient.”

  Marja’s relieved smile was more heartfelt this time. “Thank you, my lord. I shall not ask more patience of you than I need.”

  Gaelen headed for the door, and as his hand fell on the latch he turned back with a conspiratorial smile. “Oh, I almost forgot. You have a visitor who is most anxious to see you.”

 

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