by E. R. FALLON
Yet sometimes Colin wondered, when did he become a man who could mutilate someone’s body in a garage and then come home and kiss his daughter goodnight?
Catherine was sitting at the bar going over papers Colin assumed had to do with Sean’s business. Catherine did the bookkeeping for her father’s pub and restaurant now. Colin had heard she’d left her actor boyfriend and was living on her own with her daughter.
She had her back turned to him. “We’re not open,” she said as soon as he entered and the bell at the top of the door jangled. Then she looked up and over at him. “Colin, I didn’t know it was you.” She smiled.
“How have you been?” He found himself nervous around her.
“Good. You?”
“I’ve been well, thanks.”
“We haven’t talked in a while. I heard you got married.”
“Yeah. Months ago.”
Catherine laughed a little. “You sound unsure. Are you?”
Colin’s face felt hot. “A lot has been going on. I don’t know if you heard, but my wife and I just had a baby girl.”
Catherine smiled. “Congratulations.” She looked at him deeper, and he almost couldn’t bear her beauty, her large eyes and dark hair.
“Thank you,” Colin said.
“What’s her name?”
“Camille.”
“That’s a pretty name. It’s French like my mother.”
“Thanks. My wife chose it.”
“Your wife, what’s her name?”
“Sheila.”
“Right, she was your girlfriend. Sheila. What a lovely name. Is your wife lovely?”
At first Colin didn’t know what to say. “She is. She’s very lovely.”
“I assumed she would be.” Catherine didn’t sound jealous, just curious.
“But you’re beautiful.” He’d spoken without thinking first.
Catherine gave him a subtle smile and he couldn’t tell what she was thinking. Catherine was the kind of woman a man married and moved with into a large house in the country to create a big, loving family. The kind of woman a man settled down with for the rest of his life. What did that make Sheila? If Colin wanted the perfect life, had he started his with the wrong woman?
Sean walked down from his office upstairs, followed by Max.
Max approached him with open arms. He embraced Colin with passionate warmth. “How’ve you been?” He patted him on the back.
“Not bad,” Colin said.
“Not bad? You have a gorgeous wife and a beautiful new baby. And Sean’s going to promote you.” Max patted him on the back again. “Cheer up.”
Colin grinned at him. Sean promoting him meant he’d receive even more money and greater respect.
McCarthy glanced at Catherine and then guided Colin upstairs to his office.
Sean sat down behind his desk and smoked a cigarette. He poured a glass of whiskey and offered Colin, who was seated to the right of Sean’s desk in a comfortable leather chair, a glass as well. Colin declined.
“You don’t drink anymore?” Sean asked.
“No, I still drink sometimes. I just have a lot of things to do today. With the baby at home, you know. I need my head clear today.”
“Being a father is the best thing in life. Better than fine whiskey, better than money.” Sean smiled. “But you know what they say, you aren’t Irish unless you can take your drink.” He raised his glass high in the air as if to toast their fatherhood.
“I think I’m going to love being a father.”
Sean put the glass down without taking a drink after his toast and looked at Colin. He leaned back into his desk chair. “You’re a serious fellow, aren’t you? A lot of you Bowery guys are serious. Some of you don’t know how to take a joke, or make one. But I don’t think you’re like that, Colin. I think you can take a joke. But you are serious.” He watched Colin while he talked about him.
Colin looked into Sean’s cold, hollow eyes and realized how threatening Sean could be if he wanted to.
“I think your being serious is a good thing,” Sean said after a while.
Colin breathed with ease.
“You heard what Max said downstairs about me giving you a higher place in our organization?” Sean asked.
“I did.” Colin continued to stare at Sean’s eyes. Very little frightened him anymore except for Sean’s eyes.
“It’s a good idea. In fact, it’s Max’s idea, and I like it. He likes you, and I like you. I appreciate the devotion you’ve already shown me. You’ve done a lot for us. But right now wouldn’t be a good time for me to change things. Can you understand? I wish Max hadn’t said anything. He came to me with the idea and I said I’d think about it. Well, I thought about it and I’ve decided against it.”
It irked Colin but he didn’t want to see Max punished.
“The reason I said no for now is because some of the older fellows, you know, the ones who’ve been working for me longer than you have, wouldn’t like it. They’d be wondering why I moved you up instead of them. They’d think their commitment didn’t matter. I just want to make sure all is right by you.” Sean grinned in a fixed way that gave Colin the chills.
Colin nodded. What choice did he have if he wanted to make sure nothing came back to hurt Max in some way? “I understand.”
“Great. When’s the last time you went on vacation?”
“Excuse me?”
“Vacation. You know, like taking time off from work and getting out of town.”
“Oh. No, I haven’t done that.”
“Never?” Sean eyes widened in disbelief. Colin nodded slowly.
“Would you like to?”
“I suppose I would, in the future.”
Sean’s somewhat blank stare turned into a large smile. “Catherine wants to go on vacation, and I’m not about to let her go off by herself. This world is a dangerous place. You’re going with her.”
“Me?”
“Of course.”
“I appreciate the opportunity, but with Sheila and the new baby at home, I don’t know if I can go away right now.”
“It’s your job, Colin. It’s not really a vacation for you. For Cathy it is.”
Colin smiled at the irony. “Where is she going?”
“Los Angeles. Cathy wants to try out for the movies. I think she’s going to be great, don’t you? With her looks, she’s going to be famous.”
“I didn’t know she was interested in acting.”
“Neither did I until a few weeks ago. Her former fellow got her interested in it. They took some acting classes together. Will you go?”
Colin knew it was an order and he couldn’t say no or maybe. He had to say yes. But in the past, Sean hadn’t seemed to want him around Catherine. “Why me?”
Sean looked irritated that his motives had been questioned. “Because with your looks, you’ll fit in in Los Angeles. My other fellows are too ugly to go.” He chuckled.
“When do we leave?”
“Day after tomorrow. You’ll be flying there with Cathy and my granddaughter. I bought the tickets already.”
“What if I hadn’t said yes?” Colin asked out of curiosity. Sean laughed like that never would have happened. “You knew of this in advance?”
“I did, Colin.”
“I wish I’d known earlier. I’ll go but it’s kind of short notice.”
“You know how things are. Business is business. Think of yourself as a soldier during wartime. You’ve been called into combat. Maybe you aren’t so prepared, but you have to go. Do you know what I mean?” He leaned in toward Colin. “Besides, I didn’t know if it was you who I would ask to go. I had another one of the fellows lined up at first, but then I thought you’d be better and more appreciative of the job. You want to work your way up a rank, Colin? Then this is a good place to start. It’s a very important trip. If you do a terrific job with my girls out in Los Angeles, watch them closely, and make sure they don’t break even a fucking fingernail, I’ll make you what the Italian
s call a capo, a captain, when you return.”
Colin sat there and pretended to be enlightened even though he was well-versed in how the organization’s structure worked and how he was currently near the bottom.
“You’d make a lot more dough,” Sean said. “Capo. Now that’s a promotion old Tom never would’ve given a Northern guy like you.” He waited for Colin to agree with him.
“I appreciate that. How long will we be in Los Angeles for?”
“As long as Cathy wants, two weeks probably.”
Colin nodded. Two weeks with another woman. Sheila would kill him, but she’d find out somehow if he didn’t tell her before he left.
“I suppose you can sort of think of it as a vacation for yourself as well, a vacation from this whole goddamn city. And watch them, will you?” Sean spoke sincerely.
“I will.”
“Here’s your ticket.” Sean handed him an American Airlines ticket. “The flight leaves at ten in the morning. Be there an hour before. Max will be at the airport waiting with Catherine and Violet out front. Max is going, too. He’s ugly, but I’ve known him for a long time and he’s never been to L.A. He’ll give you a call at home the night before if the plans change, but I don’t expect them to.”
Colin left the office and the pub and headed out into the bright streets of New York, which he had mastered years ago. Now he was going to learn how to navigate Los Angeles a little. He figured he was on his way.
Sheila didn’t take the news well.
“If you’re going to California for two whole weeks then we’re going with you.”
“It’s for business, Sheila. McCarthy wouldn’t like it if I took my family with me.”
Colin packed his leather bag with shirts and trousers. He didn’t pay much attention to what he packed. He stopped halfway through when he recalled he’d be spending the two weeks with Catherine. He better be more careful about what he packed. Colin put in a silk tie to go with his suit.
“What kind of business is he doing out in Los Angeles? Is it really just a business trip?” Sheila stood in the doorway of their bedroom as he packed. Sunlight trickled in through the windows. Camille slept on and off in the other room.
Colin glanced over at Sheila. Her tight white dress highlighted the baby weight she hadn’t lost. Colin had told her he didn’t mind that her once taut figure had vanished, even though he sort of did.
“Colin, I’m talking to you. Quit staring at my stomach.”
“Sorry,” he muttered.
“A silk tie. You’re taking some nice clothes. What kind of trip is this?”
“McCarthy likes his guys to dress sharp.”
She glared at him. “What are you doing there?”
Colin sighed. “I’m taking McCarthy’s daughter there,” he confessed.
“A woman? How old is she? Is she an infant? Why does she need an escort?”
“Because she’s the boss’s daughter. She’s in her twenties. But before you start to panic, don’t. She’s a widow with a young daughter. She’s traveling with her child. Don’t be worried.”
Sheila entered all the way and sat on the bed. “I shouldn’t be worried that you haven’t gone to bed with me in months?” Her face reddened with anger. “Are you fucking this woman?”
“No.” Colin closed his bag and stared at her. “It’s nothing like that. I never touched her. She’s the boss’s daughter, I couldn’t touch her even if I wanted to.”
“Do you want to?”
“No, of course not. It’s a business arrangement. Sean needed someone to go to Los Angeles with his daughter and granddaughter. His daughter’s going to try out for the movies there, and he chose me to go. I didn’t choose to go. He chose me. L.A. is a big city. He wants someone to go with them to make sure they’re safe. That’s all it is. Do you want to get a big house in the country, like you talked about?” After Camille’s baptismal, they had moved into a more expensive building with an elevator and a doorman. Now Sheila wanted to move to the country to raise their daughter. “Do we want a private school for Camille someday? We’re going to be able to afford all those things and more after I make this trip.”
“Are you getting a promotion?” When he didn’t answer her, she beamed. “You are, aren’t you?”
“Yeah, if I go on this trip.”
“That’s wonderful, Colin.” Then Sheila frowned. “Is his daughter pretty?” she asked quietly. “If she’s trying out for the movies she must be pretty.”
“She is. But not as pretty as you are.” Colin kissed her.
“Do you really have to go?”
“I do. I’ll buy you a television for our bedroom when I return. So now you’ll have two televisions. And I’ll take you and Camille on a beautiful vacation soon. Okay?”
He watched her closely. She looked disappointed, and why shouldn’t she be? Her husband was leaving to spend two weeks with another woman in beautiful, warm Los Angeles. He wrapped his arms around Sheila’s waist, and she reached up and put her arms around his neck.
“Everything will be fine. I’ll be back soon, and we’ll have a great life,” he whispered into her ear.
“Oh, Colin, just don’t never come back. Or don’t go, come back, and leave me.”
“How can I leave you when I come back?” He smiled at her. “You’re peculiar sometimes, Sheila, do you know that? That’s one of the things I enjoy about you.” He gently teased her as he leaned down and buried his face in her smooth neck, smelling of soft perfume. He breathed in her comforting scent.
“I have a bad feeling, baby.”
“You sometimes have those feelings, sweetheart. They’re just feelings, they don’t mean anything.” He kissed her lightly on the nose. Inside he felt as if he had consumed cold liquid too fast. His stomach ached. Maybe Sheila was right about something, but he didn’t know what. “Sheila, you know I’d never leave you and Camille.”
The pain persisted.
She looked up at him in silence for a moment, her pretty, brown eyes staring at his face. She rubbed his back and then gently broke free of their embrace. “Go on, finish packing.”
Catherine always looked beautiful, but she looked stunning as she walked toward Colin at La Guardia Airport. Every male turned to stare as she sauntered by. Her long, dark hair framed her intelligent eyes and her soft, pink lips. She wore white gloves like an elegant woman.
He had arrived feeling down because he felt guilty leaving his family for two weeks, but seeing Catherine made him feel much better, especially the way she smiled at him. Her young daughter, Violet, was at her side. Violet was a quiet little girl and a real sweetheart.
“Colin, in that suit you look like a younger, taller version of my father.”
Colin smiled but inside he wasn’t pleased to have been compared to McCarthy. Sean had insisted he wear a certain kind of dark suit.
“Are you excited about the trip? I am,” Catherine said.
“I’m glad to have the opportunity.”
Catherine laughed.
“What’s funny?” Colin grinned but he didn’t get the joke.
“You. You’re either too serious or nervous, I can’t tell which one.”
He laughed when he realized she was being humorous.
“I’m glad my father listened to me and sent you,” she said. “It took a lot of coaxing on my part, as I’m sure you can imagine.”
Colin took that to mean Catherine had requested him, which was news to him. Max said hello to Colin and helped Catherine with her luggage. Colin offered his assistance but Max told him he could handle it.
“Are you coming with us, Max, or are you helping with the luggage until we board the plane?” Catherine winked at Colin.
“Do you really think I’d leave you alone with him?” Max glanced at Colin as he cracked the joke. “I’m coming, sweetheart. I thought your father told you all this already.”
Max stacked one of Catherine’s small suitcases on top of a larger one. He let out an exhausted sigh. He’d never ha
d much endurance, and his being overweight didn’t help either.
“Yes, I guess he did.” Catherine smiled down at Violet as the child tugged on the hem of her skirt.
“Let’s go, mommy!”
Catherine held Violet’s hand and started to walk ahead of Colin and Max.
She glanced at Colin over her shoulder. “Aren’t you coming?”
Colin looked at Max struggling with the heavy luggage. He wondered if he should again offer his help and carry some of it over to the check-in area. He looked at Catherine, with her long legs appearing smooth in her form-fitting skirt, and he decided the luggage could wait.
Her high heels clacked as she began to walk faster, and he had to run to catch up to her.
Catherine stopped walking, turned around with Violet, and smiled at him. “You’re a good servant,” she joked.
Colin was so stunned at her impudence that he stopped in his tracks for a moment and couldn’t form a reply. They went into the terminal building together. Colin walked closely at her side. He wanted to take her hand but didn’t.
“Are you really excited, Colin, or do you just think of this trip as work?” she asked.
He almost stopped in his tracks again.
Catherine blushed and roared with laughter when she realized what he thought she’d meant. “Excited about the trip, that is.”
“I’m excited.”
They both laughed.
“What does your wife think about the trip?”
“She doesn’t like it.”
Catherine smiled at him.
When they were deeper inside of the terminal Catherine asked him to hold Violet’s hand while she went to use the bathroom. The small girl’s hand felt like a doll’s in his. For a moment, he almost forgot he was holding Violet’s hand, he was so preoccupied with watching Catherine walk away.
While he waited for Catherine to return, he made chitchat with the young girl.
“Are you happy you’re going to California?”
Violet looked like a miniature version of her mother when she smiled. “Yes. So happy.”