by Miya Kazuki
After seeing Lutz off, I put one of the rattles into my tote basket. I then walked downstairs with the other one to talk to Damuel, who was in the small hall on the first floor.
“Sir Damuel, I would like to go to the orphanage.”
“Sure, not a problem,” he replied.
I power walked to the door where he was waiting for me, but before I got there he looked around and gave a stern frown. “Wait, apprentice. Where are your attendants? Are you really planning on leaving your chambers without one?”
“...Bwuh?” I had thought that wouldn’t be a problem since Damuel was around, but apparently bodyguards didn’t count as proper accompaniments like attendants did. It would be extremely unladylike for me to leave without one, so my hand was forced.
“Delia, I have something to discuss with Wilma in the orphanage. Please accompany me.”
“Sister Myne, I...” Delia turned around with a stiff expression, but swallowed her words mid-sentence and bit her lip in frustration. She wanted to refuse me, but couldn’t due to her position. Under normal circumstances I wouldn’t want to force her to do something she wasn’t comfortable doing, but with a knight like Damuel waiting on me, I couldn’t waste any more time.
“You would only need to accompany me up to the orphanage door. Does that sound manageable for you? I can instead ask Wilma to accompany me on the way back, if you so wish.”
“...As you wish.”
Delia took the lead, dejectedly advancing down the hallway. I could tell even while following from behind that her shoulders were stiff and her footsteps heavy. Her face was out of view, but I could imagine the desperate expression she was probably wearing.
When we arrived at the orphanage, Delia stopped in place. “Well then, I’ll be leaving now.”
“I think not, attendant. Open the door before you leave. You would make your mistress, the apprentice, open it herself?” Damuel’s harsh voice rang out as Delia turned to leave. I couldn’t open the door myself, and couldn’t make a knight open the door for me either. Attendants existed so as to relieve their masters of such a duty.
Delia, having been told to open the orphanage door, paled to the point that her face was pure white. Still, she looked at Damuel with no change in her stiff expression, then reached for the door. She shut her eyes tight and grit her teeth, pushing the door open with a trembling hand.
It opened with a heavy creak. Large tables were lined up across the dining hall, which was right in front of the entrance. At the furthest end was a large cushion on which Dirk was laying, surrounded by gray shrine maidens, all of whom looked this way upon hearing the door. They turned their backs on the pillow and knelt at my presence, arms crossed over their chests.
“Sister Myne. I’ll be leaving now,” Delia murmured, her head lowered so as to avoid seeing inside the orphanage.
“Of course, and I apologize for making you uncomfortable. Thank you, Delia.”
“It was nothing.” Delia glanced once in Dirk’s direction, then started to turn around. But her eyes suddenly shot wide open and she spun around, running straight for the cushion at the far end of the dining hall. “Dirk!”
He had almost successfully rolled over, with half of his body now over the side of the cushion. If he kept going and made it, he would fall right off. Delia thrust her arms beneath where Dirk would be right as he burbled and toppled over the edge.
“Geez! What would you have done if Dirk had rolled off and hurt himself?! Keep a better eye on him!” Delia’s eyes were flared up in anger as she set Dirk back down in the center of the cushion. Her complaint came from a good place, but the gray shrine maidens had no choice but to kneel and keep their heads down when a blue shrine maiden arrived. All I could do was shake my head at Delia losing herself over Dirk’s cuteness.
“...Well, now that you’re in the orphanage, why don’t you stay and watch over Dirk yourself?”
“Ah?!” Delia’s eyes widened as she realized just where she was standing. She hurriedly straightened up, and I handed her the rattle I had brought with me.
“This is a toy that makes noise. I was going to give it to Dirk myself, but why don’t you give it to him instead? I think he would be happier to play with you than he would with me.”
Delia looked at the red rattle in her hand, a conflicted expression on her face.
“He should be old enough to follow after this red color with his eyes now. Or would you rather I give it to him? I think he would be happier to receive his first toy from his older sister, but...”
I reached to take the rattle from Delia, but she gripped it firmly and held it up high—too high for me to reach.
“You can give it to him, then. Wilma, do you have a moment to talk? Everyone else can return to what they were doing.” I headed to a table within view of Dirk’s cushion with Wilma while the kneeling gray shrine maidens returned to work.
“Dirk, this is a toy Sister Myne gave us. Can you see it?” Delia said gently, shaking the rattle in front of him. Dirk followed it with wide-open eyes; it was obvious that he was attracted to the color and the sound it was making. I had wanted to see Dirk’s reaction so that I could determine whether Kamil would be ready for it, and he really did seem enraptured. No doubt Kamil would be really happy to see it too.
“Wow, he’s looking at it,” one shrine maiden said.
“I wonder whether he would like music as well?” added another.
The shrine maidens were all looking at Dirk and Delia with great interest, having little experience with babies themselves. That made Delia realize she was in public with other people around who could hear her. She stood up and glared at me, her cheeks blushing red.
“Sister Myne, I’m going back to your chambers! I’ll be leaving Dirk in your care, everyone.” Delia pushed the rattle into the hands of a nearby shrine maiden before charging out of the orphanage. Now that she had gone inside once, I would imagine that if she very gradually spent more and more time here, she would adjust to leaving her comfort zone like Wilma had.
“Sister Myne, will Delia be quite alright? I know she has lasting trauma from her time in the orphanage,” Wilma said anxiously as she watched Delia hurry out the door.
“...I wonder. I feel like she’ll be fine, assuming Dirk’s cuteness keeps influencing her. She thinks she hates the orphanage due to the memories she has of her time here, but the cellar Delia was living in is nothing like it used to be.”
Delia had spent all of her time here in a miserable cellar, and had then been sent to the High Bishop’s room on the day of her baptism. To her, the orphanage in its entirety was just that neglected cellar. Before today, she had only passed by once or twice at most; Delia would need to really feel for herself that the orphanage had changed, and if she got used to coming here then it shouldn’t be too much of a problem for her to at least enter the dining hall. Besides, if she didn’t get used to visiting the orphanage soon, she would no longer be able to see Dirk at all. He would be moved to the rooms where the pre-baptism children stayed once he was old enough to sleep soundly through the night.
“I just hope she doesn’t end up separated from her cute little brother,” I added.
“Each day when I go to get Dirk, Delia delays handing him over for as long as possible, all the while wearing the loneliest expression you’ve ever seen. I can’t help but feel that we are doing something wrong by taking him away. It would be sad for both of them if they were to be separated, so I certainly hope that Delia adjusts to the orphanage as soon as possible.” Wilma gave a faint smile, her features lacking the exhaustion that could be seen on Rosina’s and Fran’s faces.
“You do not seem very tired, Wilma. Is that because of all the people here who are able to help you?”
“I only look after Dirk during the day, and I do have others help me. Rosina and Fran end up all on their own when looking after him at night, correct? That sounds quite difficult to manage.”
It seemed that although Wilma only looked after Dirk during the da
y, some of the younger children felt like he had taken her from them and were acting like babies themselves. Some would cling to her at night when she tried to put them to bed.
“You are like the mother of this orphanage, Wilma. It must be difficult having so many needy children to look after.”
“I recall my loving mother taking care of me in the cellar before my baptism, and I want to give these children who lost their mothers the same love I received. Nothing makes me happier than them thinking of me as their mother.” Wilma smiled, brimming with love for the cute little children, and at that moment I was thankful from the bottom of my heart that I had assigned her to manage the orphanage.
With that topic over, we moved on to discussing the picture books. I began by telling Wilma that I wanted the stencils, since we would be starting a new round of printing for the picture books soon. I then explained that we had finished making colored ink and that I wanted her to plan her future art around it. As we were using the same format of printing as before, that meant we would need a stencil for each color. Finally, I told her that once I had finished making the wax stencils, she would be able to draw more detailed art.
“You truly do love books, Sister Myne. To think that you would continue inventing so many new techniques for this... I will put my absolute all into drawing for you.”
“Thank you, Wilma.”
By the time we had finished our discussion and I had the stencils from Wilma, Dirk had gotten hungry. He began to cry, but even without Wilma saying anything the other gray shrine maidens were already speedily bringing goat milk from the cellar and preparing to feed him. They were used to the process by now. If they could look after Dirk without Wilma, then it was probably best for me to return to my chambers sooner rather than later; they all had to be extremely conscious of me while working, which was beyond distracting for them.
“I know it is a heavy load on you all, but please continue taking care of Dirk. Wilma, could I ask you to walk me back to my chambers?”
Having spoken to the gray shrine maidens, I started to make my way back from the orphanage.
Both Sides of the Story
When I returned to my chambers, I could already hear Delia inside yelling “GEEEEZ!” Wilma and I looked at each other. Delia had generally been in such a good mood since Dirk had come along that neither of us had heard her this hysteric in a while.
“I see you can hear Delia too.”
“I wonder what happened?”
“Let’s hurry back, apprentice,” Damuel prompted with a guarded expression. I power walked as fast I could to my chambers, where I found Fran and Delia arguing.
“The High Priest can’t be trusted!”
“He is trustworthy.”
It seemed less like an argument and more like Delia gnashing her teeth at him, but still, it was a rare combination to see. I couldn’t help but blink in surprise.
“Fran, Delia, what is going on?” I said. It seemed neither of them had noticed me before then as Fran’s eyes opened wide. He hurriedly apologized, welcoming me inside.
“Welcome back, Sister Myne. I apologize for my unsightly behavior.”
In contrast to Fran, who had quickly composed himself, Delia ran over and gave me a sharp glare, yelling “Sister Myne! What’s the meaning of this?!” I had no idea what she was referring to.
“Erm, whatever are you talking about?”
“Delia! You must not speak to your mistress like that,” Fran rebuked, but Delia just tightly gripped my shoulders.
“I’m asking what all this business about having Dirk be adopted is about!”
“As I have repeated many times, Delia, Arno said that the idea has already been rejected. Let go of Sister Myne.” Fran detached Delia’s hands from me without letting his calm exterior falter, but I still had no idea what was going on. I was completely out of the loop.
...Could someone... please... explain?
It seemed that I wasn’t the only one at a loss here; Wilma was also blinking in surprise at Fran and Delia’s behavior.
Umm, what am I supposed to do in situations like this again? Right, right. I need to listen to get both sides of the story. Recalling what the High Priest had told me before, I was able to get a handle on the situation just a little better. I looked around, then first spoke to Wilma.
“Wilma, thank you for walking me back. You may return now. If you stay here until I have listened to them both, problems may arise in the orphanage.”
“As you wish,” replied Wilma, but she turned back to look at Fran and Delia several times on her way out of my chambers.
“Sister Myne!”
“I will listen to you both on the second floor, Delia, so for now just prepare some tea.”
I climbed the stairs with Fran, hoping on some level that Delia would calm down during the process of boiling water and carefully making tea.
On the second floor we found Rosina, who was sitting in front of a harspiel with a sleepy look on her face. We made eye contact, and while wavering a bit she stood up to greet me. “Welcome back, Sister Myne.”
“Rosina, do you know what happened?”
“No. Delia woke me up, but I did not listen for the details.”
It seemed that Delia’s shouting had woken her up during her afternoon nap. Rosina, speaking less eloquently than usual, was making her displeasure apparent even if it didn’t show on her face.
“You may return to your room to rest a little more, Rosina.”
“I believe I will.” Rosina swayed as she returned to her room.
I sat down in the chair Fran had pulled back for me, and decided to hear his side of the story first. “Sorry, but I couldn’t understand a word of what you two were saying. Could you explain the circumstances, Fran?”
“On her way back from the orphanage, Delia bumped into Arno, who was carrying a message from the High Priest, and the two of them came here. I was in the middle of my rest, but Delia called for me and I got dressed at once to meet with him.”
It seemed that not only had he been forced awake during his nap like Rosina, but he had been pushed into meeting with Arno and listening to Delia’s angry ranting at the same time. Had I been there, I could have dealt with Arno on my own.
“I apologize for my absence.”
“It is nothing to worry about,” Fran said with a dismissive shake of his head. “Even when you are here, I would like for you to call me when Arno visits.”
It seemed he felt the need to hear any messages from the High Priest whether I was there or not.
“Furthermore, if Arno had truly only been here to pass on a message, this would not have been a problem at all. I did not expect Delia to explode with anger like that.” Fran glanced toward the kitchen and sighed. His frustration was clear on his face, which was rare for him. That told me more than enough about how harsh Delia had been.
“What was Arno’s message, then?”
“That the High Priest did look for someone to adopt Dirk, but that the search was as difficult as expected.”
According to Fran, the High Priest had looked for someone to adopt Dirk, just like I had first asked him to. Arno came to tell us that although they hadn’t found anybody, it would be best for me to keep my spirits up and continue raising him in the orphanage.
I had pretty much given up on the adoption when the High Priest had said that baby boys were rarely if ever adopted, instead switching my focus to signing a contract with Dirk when I myself was adopted by a noble. To be honest, I had almost entirely forgotten about asking the High Priest to search for someone to adopt Dirk.
Wow, now that’s what I call integrity.
I was impressed after hearing Fran’s explanation, but Delia had just come up with the tea and hearing that had reignited her wrath. She set the cups down in front of me rather hard and then glared at Fran. “Why would the High Priest of all people be talking about someone adopting Dirk?!”
Judging from Fran’s explanation, neither he nor Arno knew that Dirk had the
Devouring. As it stood, Delia’s wrath was entirely focused on the point that people had been talking about Dirk being adopted outside of her knowledge.
I lowered my eyes. The High Priest had told me to hide that Dirk had the Devouring. How could I explain to Delia that we had been searching for someone to take him in and save him from his own mana?
“The High Priest must have made a hobby of ripping families apart! First he did so with Sister Myne, and now he’s trying to do the same with me and Dirk!”
“How many times have I said that the High Priest would never take joy in this?! He must have his own reasoning.”
It seemed that in Delia’s head, the High Priest was a villain who ripped apart families whenever he got the chance. One could hardly blame Fran for getting a little angry when someone he respected was being badmouthed like that.
“Delia.” I exhaled slowly, like I was taking deep breaths, then looked at her. “There are no gray shrine maidens here equipped to raise a child. To that end, I asked the High Priest to look for someone who may wish to adopt him, as I thought he may be happier that way.”
Delia’s anger turned straight toward me. “What?! You wanted to tear us apart, Sister Myne?!”
I shook my head and corrected her. “No. You didn’t even want to look after Dirk at first, remember? I didn’t think anybody would want to.”
Delia seemed to at least remember what she had said back then. Her eyes opened wide, and she faltered a little. “W-Well... that was only when he had just arrived.”
“Yes, and it was when he had just arrived that I consulted the High Priest.”
Delia fell silent, her anger cooling down.
“There are no gray shrine maidens who have raised babies before, and none of us know how best to look after him. There are no wet nurses who would be willing to visit the temple, Fran and Rosina are barely getting any sleep due to having to watch over him at night, and ultimately, I thought someone adopting him might be the best solution to everyone’s problems.”
As it was now, Fran and Rosina were at least taking naps during the day, and Delia was watching over him more than she said she would, but for those first few desperate days, Dirk really had been an immense burden on everyone. Delia remembered that, so while she did give me an unsatisfied pout, she just grumbled without saying anything.