The machinery stopped and LB rapped on the door with a fist. The door was yanked open. This Moordanaap was tall, thin and angry, the room he occupied only slightly larger than he was. He wore a leather bag strapped to his waist and a blaster under his arm. His back against the rear wall and sitting on a toilet, the rest of the room would be filled in by holo-projectors.
“Go away!” He slammed the door.
“I’ve never seen a Moordenaap that thin before,” I said.
“Liquid diet.”
Holo-LB thumped the door again. “Soggibiscuit, this is Long Barnacle your old family friend. Try to remember.”
The door opened slowly.
“Long Barnacle, what are you doing with- whatever this is?” Soggibiscuit asked.
“I am Marshal Harry Ward, my species is Homo Sapiens. I have some questions about last night. When did—”
“No,” he growled. One huge hand touched the blaster grip. “Who are you to ask me questions?”
“A Marshal Service officer, performing her duty to uphold the law.” Marshal Harry has more patience than I, and will keep repeating the same information in different ways until it enters the head of the recipient. I prefer to reset the conversation with a sharp rap across the head in question.
“Talk to Marshal Harry,” Holo-LB said. “You owe me money, Soggibiscuit, and I don’t want to see you tossed in a jail cell.”
“Honour code says we don’t back down to aliens.”
“Honour Code says we respect the law,” Holo-LB pointed out. “And the Marshal Service is the law around here. Plus if you pull a gun on her, there’s a deputy that will come round and put you in the ground.”
“You know me well,” I admitted.
“Marshal Harry winced when I said that,” LB pointed at the holo-figure. “Take note of that?”
“Soggibiscuit?” Marshal Harry whispered out the corner of her mouth.
“It means He Who Is Tall and Loud,” Holo-LB answered.
“And you are living in this... box?” Marshal Harry stuck her head over the threshold, looked up and round. Not that there was much to see.
“All I can afford, now that Loow Alsh is gone.”
“So you know he’s dead?”
“Yah. Somebody heard lawmen talking upstairs. That’s why we bolted. Nothing to do with us.”
“That was myself and my deputy,” Marshal Harry said. “Did it not occur to you that your witness testimony might be helpful?”
“No.”
“Who heard us talking?”
“Just... someone,” he shrugged.
“I bet it was Doc,” I whispered. “She has hearing like a Snooth.”
“True,” LB said, pausing the playback. “But you know this is a recording? The marshal can’t hear you?”
“I know that, smart arse. I was just thinking out loud.”
“What surprised me was, this seems to be the marshal’s first stack hotel. Don’t they have these on Earth?”
“Not sure. The marshal says all the interesting and exciting people left for the stars centuries ago. It’s just a backwater now, so maybe not.”
LB started the playback.
“What brings you to town?” Marshal Harry asked Soggibiscuit.
“Got crops need selling,” he said. “So Loow’s really dead?”
“Afraid so. Someone blasted him in the lounge.”
“Had to happen,” Soggibiscuit said. “Loow was a loud-mouthed idiot.”
“Loow was a good friend,” Holo-LB growled.
“Shoulda kept his mouth shut. Stead of bragging about- about stuff he shouldna bragged about.”
“What kind of stuff would that be?” Marshal Harry asked.
“Just general... stuff.”
“Were you in the bar last night?”
“Yes, I sold my crops to Long Barnacle and then we drank to celebrate. Until after two am when we went to bed in the basement.”
“Hah,” Holo-Isamary said. “You call those crops? The gnarly bera are all gnarl and no bera and the skinny dippers are too skinny. No one but my father would buy those crops.”
“No one but me could sell them,” Holo-LB corrected. “And then Soggibiscuit’s cubs would starve.”
“There’s nothing wrong with my—”
“Did you remember anything,” Harry interrupted in her calm, firm voice. “That could give us an exact time of death for Loow?”
“I used the toilet around five am,” Soggibiscuit volunteered. “Loow was sitting on the bar with his gun, fast asleep. Big Sam was standing by the front door.”
“Thank you, that’s useful,” Harry said. “And is that the only weapon you have?”
“Only weapon I need,” he bragged, patting the pistol’s grip.
“That’s a Monstrophalic 38,” I said. “Couldn’t shoot a hole in tinfoil.”
“Story of Soggibiscuit’s life,” LB said. “A lot of noise and nothing to back it up.”
LB fast forwarded us to the next scene. An office building with a variety of species coming in and out. Mainly arthropods. That meant exoskeletons and lots of legs. I grabbed the remote and pressed slow-mo as a fine eight-legged specimen walked by. A real queen.
“That’s a Guossa,” LB pointed out. “They snap the heads off their lovers before mating.”
“She could be worth it. Right, who were you here to see?”
“The money lenders,” LB snatched the remote back. “Listen, I have questions. Like, are humans telepathic?”
CHAPTER 11
“Not that I’ve noticed,” I admitted.
“Then how does the marshal know what she knows?”
“Like what?”
“I’ll show you.” LB slowed the recording as we arrived in an outer office. There was a glass case of sports memorabilia against one wall, with holo-pics of winners, plus trophies and medals, covering the rest of the wall. A low table on the opposite wall displayed antic weapons.
“Hey, that’s me and the Queen of Shaws winning the Autumn Gaiety dance competition. Tough night.”
“I remember. You were two falls down against the Bronki sisters when you got that submission in the final round.”
I shrugged four shoulders: “Like I said, tough night.”
When viewing a recording through someone’s eyes, the POV darts all over the place. But it seemed like Holo-LB and Isamary were standing back to back in the middle of the room. There were three Tooyr, with guns strapped under each armpit. The marshal reached the receptionist’s desk and asked to see the boss.
“You are doing this all wrong,” I told LB.
“What now?” LB threw his hands in the air. They went a long way, before landing in his lap.
“You should stand between the marshal and those Tooyr.”
“Hullo,” he emptied his glass and swallowed, “they had guns, and we didn’t?”
“Doesn’t matter,” I shook my head. I would have attacked one of the side men and kept his back to the other two. But I watch a lot of action flicks. “You were there in my stead. That means you protect the marshal.”
“She seems able to take care of herself.”
“No excuses.” I pointed from the marshal to the three thugs. “She is the smallest person in the room. One of those Tooyr could crush her just by falling over.”
“Okay, I will take a note for the future. To be honest, in my young day I would have fancied my chances against three Tooyr, but my joints aren’t up to... dancing... like they used to.”
“Enough of the bragging, on with the show.”
The POV followed the marshal and so did the three bruisers. They entered the inner office. It was decorated in green plush; the floor covered in thick moss and the walls splashed with lichens. For Tooyr, the lichens doubled as art and snacks. The stag seated at an imposing desk at one end of the room, wore the fingerless gloves of a money lender and the white stockings on forearms and shins of a lawyer. He had the intelligent look of a Tooyr with brain implants and upgrades.
&n
bsp; “That’s a shyster and a half,” I said.
“You must loan me your language app,” LB said. “The vocabulary is fantastic.”
“I’ll hook you up with my app guy.”
Marshal Harry stepped up to the desk. I admired the desk, it was dark Nagla wood. I could spend a happy month gnawing my way through it.
“Hello, I am Marshal Harry Ward the 23rd, these are Deputy Long Barnacle and his son.”
“I am Sloong Windied, at your service, and these are my... personal assistants. How may my we assist the only marshal in the city?”
LB paused the recording.
“That was a blatant attempt at intimidation,” he said. “It was in his tone.”
“Didn’t work on the marshal, though,” I said. Isamary was the heaviest lump of muscle in the room and he looked ready to run. LB noticed me looking over his boy.
“His generation never fought the wars we did,” he said. “But I like it that way.”
He pressed play.
“I am investigating the death of Loow Alsh, I believe he was a client of yours?”
“More than a client- a friend. We spent many evenings sipping single grush and discussing the latest ev—”
“But first and foremost he was a client... who owed you money.”
“I am not just a business man, I am a lawyer, and as such I intend to call every word that passed between myself and Loow confidential.”
The three assistants sauntered in behind the marshal. Holo-LB squared up to the lead thug and matched stares.
“Two points—” Marshal Harry said. I reached over and pressed pause.
“That’s not how you do it. You intimidate those three dumplings by promising to drop their boss first.”
“The marshal doesn’t seem to like that kind of talk.”
“I don’t talk. I make my intentions clear in my body language. Behind Marshal Harry’s back.”
I pressed play. There were right angles in Marshal Harry’s back and shoulders as she wandered over to a wall. That told me there was a head of steam brewing. The wall had holo-portraits of spaceships, with the name and registration of the craft along the bottom. “Point one, your client is dead, so I don’t believe client confidentiality applies. Point two, he was murdered and you say he was your friend?”
“I played tagie-toe with Loow for years, but this is business, the details of which had no connection to his death.”
“You say?” Marshal Harry stuck her chin out. The fuse had reached the explosive. She strode behind Sloong Windied where a holo-pic of a huge Tooyr with twelve point antlers took up most of the wall. The pic was larger than life. “I suppose even money lenders can’t get paid off by dead people.”
“Exactly,” Windied said, standing. “I am glad you realise this and can now lea—”
“Unless the punter can’t pay, and then money lenders make an example of them.”
“Ah... I fear you have just overstayed your welcome, Marshal. My personal... assistants will now assist you to the curb.”
Marshal Harry spun, held up one hand and stated:
“Stop. If you three value your freedom, you will not move.”
“How does she do it?” LB whispered.
“Do what?”
“Those three leg breakers just stopped in their tracks. But as you said, she is the smallest person in the room.”
“It’s her tone. She means what she said. If they’re not careful, she will raise one eyebrow at them.” As a survivor of the eyebrow, I shivered.
Marshal Harry grabbed the frame and swung the portrait away from the wall, revealing a wall safe.
“How did you—” Windied demanded.
“Tell me what Loow Alsh and you were into, or I open this vault and broadcast the contents to Marshal HQ via my cybernetic implants.”
“The security of that safe is well beyond the abilities of a mere human—” Windied stated. Marshal Harry punched a code. The door failed to open and Windied’s grin widened. “To break.”
“He’s in for a nasty shock,” I said. Not a question. The marshal punched the keypad, the door clicked and Windied leapt to his feet.
“You have no right to look in there. That is my personal property.”
“You know the law,” Marshal Harry said. “You can keep a marshal out unless I have a warrant. But let a marshal in and anything I look at is fair game.”
“Your cybernetic implants are broadcasting to Marshal HQ?”
“Yes. So talk or I drop a load of trouble on your shoulders.”
“Boss, we could still throw them out,” the lead thug pointed out.
“I’ll drop you first,” Holo-LB said.
“Yeah, we both will,” Isamary said.
“You couldn’t drop eggs, cub,” Lead Thug said.
Holo-LB stepped forward and unwound a punch that staggered the Tooyr. The Thugs Two and Three raised their fists.
“Knock that off,” Windied ordered. “Tell your temporary deputy to take it outside or something, Marshal.”
“LB, hold up. Windied- answer my questions.”
“Who told you about the safe and keypad?” Windied demanded. “I have told no one that code.”
“I don’t answer questions, I ask them. What were you and Loow into?”
“I loaned him money. That is all. I did not ask him what he wanted it for. Do you know what is in that safe? What you will discover if you open that door?”
Marshal Harry stared into the Tooyr’s face. She nodded, once. Windied sat back down.
“See?” LB said. “She says stuff like she has been reading everyone’s mind.”
“Marshal Harry is great at working things out. Deduction, she calls it. If she says she knows what is in that safe, she isn’t lying.”
“He never missed a repayment,” Windied began to babble. “We had no reason to doubt that would continue. I believe he had a project he was desperate to complete. Something good for his soul, he once said.”
Marshal Harry pointed a finger. Windied hunched. “I am fully occupied hunting a murderer. I will find him, and then I will come hunting you. Do not be in my city.”
“That isn’t fair,” Windied cried. “I have roots here. I am a—”
“Criminal. You take advantage of people when they are at their weakest. If they are not weak, you sell them the stuff that will make them weak.”
The marshal leaned into Windied. He curled into himself under her stare. She spun on her heel and strode out. LB and Isamary fisted hard to catch up. All the way out to the curb the POV swivelled-front- back- front.
“Swear to Aubergines, I thought those three leg-breakers would come after us,” LB said.
The office door stayed shut. The silence lasted until they got outside.
“That was amazing,” Isamary said. “How did you know all that stuff?”
The POV looked at the sky and I heard holo-LB wheezing, then he looked at the pavement for a while.
“This is a useful record,” I pointed out. “I’m learning a lot.”
“Hey, it’s been decades since I ran that hard,” LB pointed out.
“Mr Windied is such an egotistical man,” the marshal’s voice came from off-hologram. I could count the cracks in the pavement. “That he has holograms of ships he owns on his wall. The marshal service has been working to track the owners of those ships for months. We suspect they smuggle drugs. I used the first two digits of each ship’s ident on the keypad, and it opened when I entered them in order, right to left.”
“But how...” Isamary asked again.
“He looked uncomfortable when I walked round to the holo-portrait of his dad. I deduced there was something he didn’t want me to find.”
“She read the body language of an alien species,” LB said. “I’ve been around Tooyr for centuries, and I can only spot when they’re angry.”
“They head butt you in the face,” I pointed out.
“Exactly.” LB looked down at his temporary marshal badge for a long moment
. “Protecting this human is a big job. This marshal sees the fires of hell and walks in and pokes through the ashes to find out what happened.”
“That’s what I like about her,” I admitted. “Backing the marshal can be hard work, but it is never boring.”
“Are you sure she isn’t telepathic?” LB asked again. “Because shouting `stop` at three Tooyr leg-breakers has never worked for me.”
“I theorise on my holo-vlog that it is an ancient pheromone system that science has not found discovered.”
“I think it is telepathy,” LB said. “So, after the Marshal faced down the most dangerous loan sharks on the planet, I took her round to Auld Arty’s place.”
“Why?”
“Nobody knew Lew better than Schemiedan and to get to him you have to go through Auld Arty.”
The logic was flawless, but Auld Arty wasn’t.
CHAPTER 12
We fast forwarded, made a nice blur of a half hour walk.
“Bet you moaned about your knuckles the whole way,” I said.
“Did not- Isamary did enough moaning for both of us. What kind of planet grows an ape with no fur that walks around instead of hiding in trees?
I shrugged: “Must be a strange place.”
The POV jiggled into a small box room filled with junk. Arty’s species mould stuff around them with silk, as a kind of body armour, so only his mouth and eyes were visible from behind a cracked screen and a keyboard with twelve missing keys. We let the projector fast forward through the long waffle of Auld Arty. The room went black.
“Is there something wrong with the projector?” I asked, smacking it with a claw.
“No, this is where I fell asleep.”
I looked around in the dark.
“But you were standing up.”
“Yes but...” LB sighed. “You know Auld Arty.”
The room came back. Auld Arty still talking, and the marshal still sitting, listening and trying to get a word in.
“See how tough the marshal is?” I pointed out, proudly. “She didn’t even yawn.”
“If boring people was a televised event, that man could make a lot of money,” LB said. He reached over and pressed play as we zoomed out the door, through some streets and up to an old warehouse just outside the Port Authority fence. The one door in the wall was so narrow, Isamary and LB had to turn sideways and shuffle through. The marshal walked in, looking about the little room.
When Harry Met Chunglie Box Set Page 13