Dawn looked up with a smile and kissed his way toward Mage’s navel, still in awe of this development. Not only was Mage reciprocating his feelings, but allowing Dawn to take his time and explore. None of this was like the porn Dusk had given Dawn years ago in a misguided attempt at gay sex education. This felt right.
He still held Mage’s cock when he closed his lips around the head, surprised by the groan that came from his own mouth. His face was flushed, his ears hot as hellfire, but all he could think of was the pleasure he could give Mage, and how none of this felt dirty or illicit.
Fingers tightened on Dawn’s shoulder, but Mage still didn’t try to pull him any closer. His thigh and stomach muscles stiffened, but when he touched Dawn’s hair, it was to caress his scalp so gently Dawn burned to give him the best head of his life.
He started slow, sucking around the large cockhead before moving south, toward Mage’s carefully groomed balls. It wasn’t exactly realistic to assume he’d be great at this his first time, but he had the advantage over the women Mage had been with because of having a dick himself. Then again, he’d never received a blowjob, so what did he know?
He looked up and gave Mage’s balls another kiss. “Tell me if something doesn’t feel right.”
Mage watched him from beneath lowered eyelids. He was spread out over the bed, and only the broad movements of his chest betrayed excitement. “Don’t bite or punch, and we’re good,” he said, but took hold of one of Dawn’s hands and placed it on his balls.
Dawn rolled them in his palm, eagerly returning his lips to his lover’s cock. He would have loved any kind of penis Mage had, but the one in Dawn’s mouth was a favorite without any competition. Thick, hard, with a large cockhead. He could just imagine it—
He coughed when he attempted to take too much of it into his mouth at once but quickly got back to sucking. More pre-cum was released, and while he didn’t exactly enjoy its flavor, he swallowed all, wanting to accept everything Mage had to offer. The cock felt so good in his mouth, and as the head slid up and down his tongue, his entire body started feeling strange, as if there were warm fingers probing at his genitals and buttocks.
He dared to pull away and crawled back up Mage’s body for a kiss. His hand went back over the slick cock, but he pulled Mage’s fingers to his own underwear. “Will you… um?”
Mage’s eyes were wide open, and his nostrils flared, as if he were readying himself for much more than touching his lover. “Just… tell me if you’re not sure of something, okay?” he whispered, squeezing Dawn through his underwear.
Dawn nodded but let out a moan that surprised even him, and he moved his hand over Mage’s cock in a steady rhythm. Would he be to Mage’s liking? No, he knew he would. Mage loved him. He didn’t just love Dawn’s body, because what he really wanted was to enjoy their connection.
“I will. I want you to touch me more, but… you know, just with the hand?” It felt awkward to talk about this stuff, but there was no way around it if Dawn wanted to communicate his intentions.
Mage nodded, watching Dawn as if they were discussing national security. “So no mouth. Just hand?” he asked softly, stretching alongside Dawn and pulling his cock out of its fabric confines. Unlike last time, his touch didn’t freak Dawn out. It was expected, welcome, and so delicious Dawn curled his toes into the sheet.
“Um, yeah… This time. It’s just that—” He hid his face in Mage’s neck. “I’m so hot for you I just wanna come already.” He’d never imagined having the courage to say such words to another person, yet here he was. Excited, safe, and stroking a gorgeous cock.
Mage’s smile turned predatory, and he shifted closer, until his cock was aligned with Dawn’s. They looked so perfect together Dawn couldn’t even put the picture into words, but when Mage’s large, warm hand squeezed them both at once, his entire body transformed into jelly.
“Go on then. Come all over my dick.”
Dawn had nothing to say to that. Heat overflowed inside him, and he moaned at the intensity of this experience. No one had ever jerked him off. Hell, no one had ever kissed him before Mage. His brain was boiling, but he didn’t even care about embarrassment anymore when he rocked his hips into Mage’s hand, and against the bigger cock. He was dizzy all over again, but this time—for the right reason. He groaned shamelessly, holding on to Mage’s shoulders, and his body took over, leading him into an intense orgasm that left his cum all over Mage’s cock and hand.
It was too hot to be real.
Their lips locked in a kiss, and Dawn was catapulted to another dimension when Mage started rapidly jerking off without letting go of Dawn’s own cock. The cum made the glide slick, and just before it became too much, Mage trembled, stiffening next to his. A groan left Mage’s mouth and trailed along Dawn’s tongue as hot, fragrant sperm splashed his skin.
Correction. This was the hottest thing to ever happen to anyone. Ever.
Dawn wrapped his arms around Mage’s neck and wouldn’t back out of the kiss, too overwhelmed to let go. He wanted to be close to Mage and feel the orgasm rolling over his lover’s body, feel how they panted as one, without being afraid to slide their sweaty skin even closer.
Mage held Dawn close, lying next to him like a sated lion, with his hair tossed all over the pillow. “So… was this fun?” he asked in the end, gently petting Dawn’s back. His glasses had fogged over, and he impatiently placed them on the bedside table.
Dawn laid on top of Mage, shifting his hips back and forth to cover himself with more of Mage’s spunk. So it was naughty. Big deal. “Yes,” he whispered into Mage’s lips, more enamoured than ever before. “I feel so close to you now. Like it’s a weight off my shoulders. I’ve wanted this for so long.”
Mage smiled and pushed hair out of Dawn’s eyes. When their gazes met, the love in Mage’s was so clear Dawn almost felt as if he didn’t deserve that level of devotion. “So… I’m guessing nothing’s gonna change between us, right?”
“Nothing. I want to stay like this forever. Oh, my God. I’m such a sap. But you know my poems and songs, so you know that much. The only thing changing is that I feel so much more at ease with you now. I’m just so happy, you know?”
Mage swallowed and kissed Dawn’s cheek. “Me too. And I was thinking that maybe we should tell the others?”
Dawn’s brain came to a halt. No. Not now. Not when he was just getting used to intimacy. It made sense to keep this to themselves and never be confronted about their relationship. “Dusk is gonna make a big deal out of it.” He groaned. “How about we wait until the end of the tour?”
Mage didn’t reply right away, but in the end he rested his head next to Dawn’s and pulled the comforter over their skin. “Maybe you’re right.”
Chapter 10
They no longer lived in the cheapest motels while on tour, but the size and quality of the apartment Asher rented out for Sid and him surpassed the simple comfort of Mage’s own accommodation. Mage was far from complaining, since the room he shared with Dawn was clean, had an ensuite, and two queen-size beds, but it sure was nice to relax in an actual living room instead of celebrating in public where they’d have to be prepared for fans overhearing things or trying to join the end-of-tour party.
This one was only for the band and their closest friends, so there was only a total of six people in attendance, just enough to consume the contents of seven pizza boxes, three packs of chips, a bag of candy, and a couple of six-packs. And then die.
Dawn had enjoyed much better appetite in the last few weeks. He was usually so focused on whatever melody was playing in his head that he’d forget about eating lunch or dinner, and Mage liked to think that it was all the energy he was burning in bed that gave him the munchies. This time, Dawn actually sat on the floor by the coffee table to stay closer to the pizza, following Sid’s example.
The large L-shaped sofa accommodated them all with ease, but Asher sat in an armchair across the coffee table like a seventies villain with his sleek silver hair and sha
rp suit. At least he’d taken off the tie. Lolly and Dusk were in the middle of a tiny food fight next to Mage, and he dreaded to think about the state of the white sofa once the two clowns were done trying to stuff each other’s faces with rolled up slices of pizza.
But Mage was also jealous when he looked at them expressing affection so freely. He’d agreed to keep his relationship with Dawn secret until the end of the tour, but the tour ended tonight, and Dawn hadn’t tried to broach the topic since the last time they’d discussed this. He’d dealt with all the frustration that came with a secret love affair, but maybe the time would finally come to announce it to everyone.
Perhaps he should be the one to suggest this to Dawn, but the passing days had only made Mage more anxious about the whole thing, so he kept his mouth shut and just went with whatever Dawn felt most comfortable with—silence and risk avoidance. He still hoped they could come out about being an item until Christmas, because the idea of dining with the Hills while pretending he was only a friend to their sons didn’t sit well with him.
His heart soared when Dawn briefly looked back and offered him a marinara-stained smile. He was too cute for words, and with each passing day, it became harder to pretend that nothing changed. Before he kissed Dawn for the first time, Mage had wondered if he’d ever have sex with a guy. He did occasionally watch gay porn, and he did fantasize about some guys, but he always felt that being with girls was the easier, more straightforward choice. It would not aggravate his relationship with his family, which was already somewhat strained, and since it was the default, no one would question his reasons for being with that girl or another. Well, unless it was some kind of crazy chick, but he’d never been into those.
He used to believe that the love he had for Dawn would forever remain platonic, so he allowed those feelings to develop, but the stronger they burned in his chest, the more painful it was to be with other people when he knew he couldn’t have the one person he really wanted. But now that he knew Dawn felt the same about him, all of the walls Mage had built up around his gay needs crumbled.
It didn’t come as a surprise that he enjoyed the shape of Dawn’s body with its narrow hips, prominent Adam’s apple, and flat chest, but touching another man’s cock, which before had seemed so incomprehensible, gave Mage as much pleasure as having his own handled.
After a bit of coaxing, Dawn had allowed Mage to suck him off, and while it had given Mage a bit of stage fright, the act ended up feeling like the most natural thing under the sun. Dawn was so beautifully responsive, and every moan he made was a new turn on, contrasting so much with Dawn’s usual reserved self. With Mage, he let go, and it was a sight to behold. Face flushed, hair sweaty, lips plump and oh so kissable—
“It’s your big night, Dawn. You’ve got a date. I didn’t want to say anything until the tour was over, in case you had a heart attack, but here we are. About time, right?” Dusk said out of nowhere, making Mage’s mind go blank.
What was this fuckery about?
Dawn stopped chewing, then stared at Mage before turning back to Dusk. “Huh?”
Mage’s stomach plummeted, and it didn’t matter that just seconds ago he’d been dreaming of Dawn’s cum drowning his tongue, and the cute dark beauty spots on Dawn’s stomach, because there was only one thing on his mind.
How had Dusk found out?
He searched all the other faces for clues, but Lolly was the only one smiling. Of course.
Dusk didn’t even spare Mage a glance, focusing all his attention on his victim. He opened a fresh beer and pushed it into his brother’s hand. “Gulliver asked me if you’d be interested, so I made the decision for you.”
Dawn’s eyes became as large as the pizzas on the table. “What? No!” His voice got that high pitch of panic that set off all the alarms in Mage, without fail.
Dusk waved his hands as if this was no big deal. “Don’t worry! I told him to keep it PG. You’ll just have dinner and see what happens. He’s perfectly harmless.”
Mage’s jaw clenched, and he loudly slammed his bottle down. “No. What the hell, Dusk? You can’t just pimp him out like that! If he was interested, he would have told you.”
Nothing would have come out from this parody of a date anyway, but that wasn’t the point. Was he to sit there and watch his boyfriend go have dinner with another guy? How much longer would this charade last?
Asher frowned at Dusk, his hand resting on Sid’s shoulder. “I know I was the one who hired him, but there’s a reason he wasn’t invited to this party. He makes everyone uncomfortable.”
Sid nodded. “Dude’s good at his job, but weird as hell. I bet he’s up to some kinky fuckery in the closet.”
Lolly laughed and threw a chip at Sid. “Takes one to know one.”
Dusk shook his head. “Ridiculous. He’s just awkward. Like Dawn. They’d be good together.”
It was a personal blow, and Mage wouldn’t just leave it unanswered. “Dawn’s not awkward! He’s just very sensitive. And besides, the fact that you’ve fucked more people than there are days in the year doesn’t mean you know what’s best for him!”
Dusk rolled his eyes but didn’t look particularly tough with the pizza sauce on his face. “Okay, so I’ve been around the block. You’re saying that like you’re some saint. All I’m trying to communicate is that Dawn can’t handle a guy who’s overconfident and forward. He wouldn’t know what to do.”
Dawn gasped. “I… I…”
Dusk spread his arms. “Let’s be real, Dawn. You can’t spend the rest of your life jerking off to the peach scene in Call Me By Your Name.”
Dawn went beet red. “That’s not—”
“Save it, I’ve seen it on your computer.”
“It’s a very emotional scene, okay?” Dawn hid his face in his hands. “And it doesn’t matter anyway, because I’m dating someone already!”
The room went dead silent, and at once Mage was dying to point to himself and tell everyone that it was him Dawn was dating. He hated himself for being so respectful of Dawn’s wishes, sometimes.
Lolly sat up, watching Dawn with a flush on his face, as if this was the juiciest piece of information he’d heard to date. “Is it someone you met on the Internet? Like, I’ve met this guy once on a drawing discussion group, and when we met, he insisted I dress up in a schoolgirl uniform.”
Dusk’s face fell. “Right. There’s plenty of creeps out there,” he said, dismissing Lolly’s claims that the guy he’d met had been actually nice.
Mage clenched his fists. “He never said it was on the Internet.”
“But he doesn’t exactly go out. We’d know if there was someone hovering around… him…” Lolly’s eyes darted to Mage as he said the last words, and with the way his speech slowed down, it was obvious to Mage that the dots got connected in that pink brain. Dusk, on the other hand, was too hasty to pay attention to the little things.
“Dawn, if you ever intend meeting this guy, I demand to come as your escort. For all we know, he could be a serial killer.”
Dawn shook his head, and then crawled up on the sofa and hugged Mage from the side, hiding his face in Mage’s hair. “It’s Mage, okay? It’s Mage. I’m dating Mage.”
As much as Mage had longed for this moment of acknowledgement, and as pleasant it felt to hear those words from Dawn’s mouth, the weight of the four pairs of eyes focusing solely on him was starting to push air out of his lungs.
This wasn’t how he’d imagined this to go. “It’s true. We’re together.” He cleared his throat, briefly watching Dawn’s flushed face. “Have been throughout almost the entire tour.”
Asher’s eyebrows went up high, but it was Dusk who jumped to his feet, staring at them with sudden sobriety. “I would maybe, maybe, believe that if you weren’t straight.”
Dawn dared look up at his brother, but his arms remained around Mage’s neck. “Why aren’t you listening?”
Mage swallowed hard and pulled Dawn closer, weirdly embarrassed by this discussion suddenl
y turning to him. “I never once said I was.”
Asher raised one hand. “That’s not true. You literally said that to my face when I interviewed you.”
Mage wanted to disappear, melt into the sofa or something. “No. I just spoke about girls, because that’s who I’m most often attracted to!”
Dusk shook his head. “That’s impossible. We’ve had so many sleepovers. We would have at least jerked each other off or something if you were bi.”
Mage did a double-take before taking all the shocked faces as confirmation that he’d heard right. “I do not want to jerk off my friends. What the hell? You’re not even my type.”
Lolly’s head shot up, as if he were a rabbit looking out for danger. “Dusk is everyone’s type! Just look at him!”
Dusk stood still, taking deep breaths as if he’d just read their first bad review all over again. “What is this fuckery, anyway? You do not date bandmates! It always ends badly! Always!”
Mage rolled his eyes. “Oh, come on! We’ve known one another for how long? You can’t believe I haven’t put thought into this. Does this make things harder? Yes, but I am not giving up on this relationship because you’re afraid for the band!”
In the background, Lolly pulled the bowl of chips closer, as if this was a Jerry Springer show, not their life, and that made Mage even angrier.
Dusk scowled so viciously his gums showed. The lamp behind him made the frizz around his head visible, and it almost seemed like the hair bristled in response to what he had found out. “Exactly! We’ve known each other for years, and you haven’t mentioned that oh, by the way, Dusk, I’m bi too!” he snarled, and kicked an empty pizza box across the floor. “That’s it, we’re officially no longer best friends!”
Mage frowned, surprised by this tantrum, even though he knew Dusk well enough to have seen his fair share. “This is ridiculous. What next? Are you going to send me an official friendship-dissolving letter?”
“Maybe I will, Magnus.”
Lolly snorted. “What? Magnus? For real?”
The Underdogs Box Set - Books 1-3 (gay rockstar romance) Page 52