by Lea Coll
After the room was transformed into the reception, I hung back, making sure everyone was seated so the servers could bring out the food. A hand curled around my elbow. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”
I looked around the room at the effect of the twinkling lights and greenery curling around the beams and the drape of the ivory fabric, then I looked down at her.
The room turned out great, but I said, “You’re beautiful.”
She flushed, looking away from me. “You have to stop saying things like that.”
“Why? Don’t all women want to hear they’re beautiful?”
She leaned in close, her breasts brushing against my forearm, lowering her voice. “You make me want more. You make me want everything.”
More than I could give. “I’m sorry.”
I was sorry for so much more than that. I was sorry we couldn’t be more. I was sorry we lived on opposite ends of the country. I was sorry I couldn’t be the man she needed.
“No. It’s okay. I like it.” Her smile was sad.
“Me too.” I liked being with her. It wasn’t awkward like I would have imagined it would be with any of the other women I’d been with. She fit at the lodge, with our friends and with me.
We sat down to eat, enjoying the company of our friends and my family. I wondered about what Kelsey had said about her family not showing up for her. She’d said she was lonely, but to think her parents wouldn’t come to her wedding was worse than I thought. Her wounds ran deeper than mine.
We danced in each other’s arms while the snow continued falling steadily as it had all day. When Elle and Gray left, the guests quickly departed after that. The catering crew cleaned up the food, but we’d take care of the rest the next day.
“Can we go to your room?” Kelsey asked. “I want to be alone.”
The catering people were bustling about, doing dishes and throwing out the trash. We wouldn’t be able to have a quiet moment.
“Sure. I’ll just check back in a little while to make sure everything’s cleaned up.”
In my condo, Kelsey didn’t pull off her shoes as we walked in. Instead, she grabbed my hand, pulling me toward the deck. “I want to dance in the snow.”
“Let me turn on the heaters first and grab some jackets and gloves.”
Once I had that taken care of, I gestured for her to come outside. She took my outstretched hand, letting me pull her close, a soft smile on her face.
Her body resting against mine, the cool air on our cheeks, she tilted her face up to the sky. “It’s so beautiful.”
The flakes were coming down harder, thick and fat. The world around us silent. Kelsey lowered her head to my chest, and we danced in the snow for as long as we could stand the cold. Inside, I peeled off her layers until she was lying on my bed, her skin flushed from my kisses. The fire burning in my fireplace illuminated her skin. With the snow falling outside and nothing but the fire lighting the room, it felt like a dream. Like we could live in this moment forever, no worries about tomorrow, or planes to catch. It was just her, me, and this thing looming between us, getting bigger and bigger.
I worshiped her, knowing it was the last night we’d have together. After tonight, we’d need to go back to being friends who’d see each other occasionally. I took my time, loving her with my mouth, tongue, and fingers. When she was soft and languid, I moved up her body, interlacing my fingers with hers on either side of her head as I entered her. I’d never felt more connected to another human being. Whether it was the wedding, the love we’d seen between Elle and Gray, or us, I didn’t let anything else intrude on our time. When we orgasmed together, I let my weight fall heavily on her before rolling to the side, bringing her with me. I kissed her temple, her cheek, and her mouth, telling her I loved her without using the words.
The words were unnecessary when there was nowhere for them to go. Saying them out loud would only make tomorrow more difficult.
“Henry, I’m…”
“Shhh… Don’t say it. Don’t say you’re sorry or that you wish things could be different. They aren’t.” I tightened my grip on her, reveling in the feel of her in my arms.
Too soon, I’d have to steel myself against her. I’d need to distance myself from her the closer we got to her getting on that plane. But for now, I could pretend she was mine, that she belonged with me in Telluride.
Chapter 21
Kelsey
* * *
I woke to a dark room. On my side, facing the window, I could see snow coming down hard, slanting to the side. Locals seemed to take snow in stride but this seemed more substantial than usual.
Last night, I wanted to tell Henry how I felt. I wanted to tell him I wished I could stay. He cut me off before I could say anything which made me think he didn’t want that. Would he be different this morning? Would he push me away?
I turned, finding he was already awake, a hand flung behind his head as he watched me. “You’re awake.”
“I’ve been awake.”
“Oh.” I wasn’t sure what to say or what it meant.
“It’s really snowing.” He nodded toward the window.
“Do you think I’ll have difficulty flying out?”
“You might.” He reached for his phone, scrolling through, probably checking the weather.
I wasn’t ready for reality to intrude. I wanted a lazy morning in bed. Unfortunately, Henry seemed all too ready to let the real world in.
“No delays yet, but we might have trouble getting out of Telluride if this keeps up. They’re predicting another foot.”
“Another foot?”
“Yeah, we got a foot last night.”
“Wow.” I wrapped the sheet around me as I padded across the cold floor to the window. Words for the view caught in my throat. It was perfection.
The entire property was blanketed in a thick coating of snow, unmarred and perfect. The caterers left last night. Henry made sure to go down and check on their progress. There were no guests in the lodge until later today.
“We’re alone.” Henry came to stand behind me, his heat seeping through the sheet.
“We should make the most of our time.” I turned to face him, letting the sheet drop, my nipples pebbling in the cold. Henry reached down, picking me up under the knees, and throwing me back on the bed. He was more intense than ever. He thrust harder as if he was trying to drive a point home. Was he fighting the emotions swirling between us?
We took a shower, spending more time on each other. The weather hadn’t changed when we came out. Henry made omelets with avocados artfully placed on top, and we drank our coffee while sitting on the couch, watching the snow come down.
“I could do this all day.”
“I should probably check your flight. We need to leave in an hour.”
I was warm and content with no desire to leave. He pulled me into his chest, holding me close. He picked up his phone from the coffee table. I closed my eyes, letting him scroll to the email I’d sent with my itinerary. “Shit.”
I turned in his arms. “What is it?”
He had the airline’s website up on his phone. “Everything’s shut down.”
My mind was slowly turning. We’d planned to leave early to have enough time to get there, shortening our time together. Now there was no need to leave.
“What should I do?” My mind was reeling with possibilities. “Should I call the airline to book another flight?”
“There’s nothing to do now.”
I settled back into his arms. It was a short reprieve. Relief poured through my veins. I didn’t want to leave. How deep did that desire go? Did I not want to ever leave or was saying goodbye always going to be this hard?
“I want you to stay.” He kissed the top of my head.
“We can play in the snow…” I smiled, tilting my face up. I felt lighter, like a kid who just found out they had a snow day and school was closed.
He winked. “Go snowmobiling.”
It sounded like the perfect da
y.
“Let’s get bundled up and go for a walk,” I said.
We changed quickly, heading outside. The lodge was eerily quiet; new guests were set to arrive this afternoon for check-in but most probably wouldn’t be able to make it into town. We’d have one more night to ourselves.
The flakes fell hard, stinging my cheeks and nose. “I feel bad for Gray and Elle. Hopefully, they’ll be able to fly out in a day or two.”
“Yeah.” He took my hand, walking me into the woods, down to the creek. The snow was deep, more than a foot now, so the walk was a workout in boots.
We sat on large rocks by the creek.
Snow exploded on my chest, shocking me. “What was that?”
I stood, holding my hands up as I backed away. Henry laughed, picking up more snow, forming another snowball. I needed to find cover and return fire. I turned, slipping as I ran behind a thick tree. I scooped up snow, easily compacting it into a snowball. Peeking around the tree, I threw it at Henry. It fell pitifully at his feet.
“You missed,” Henry said in a singsong voice.
Growling, I made another one, throwing it harder this time, aiming for his chest. It hit its mark. “Oh, you’re being serious about this.”
“Dead serious,” I countered.
“Game on,” he said with such determination, I worried if I was in over my head.
I shrieked as he ran for my hiding spot. I zigzagged away from him, trying to grab snow to throw over my shoulder, but he was bigger and faster. I had to concentrate on running. Occasionally, I’d duck behind a tree, throwing a snowball to give me time to take off again. We were laughing and slipping so much, the snowballs weren’t making their target. I took off when we got to a clearing, Henry’s arm banded around me, turning me as we fell to the ground. The impact knocked the wind out of me a little. He brushed my hair out of my face as I stared down at him.
“I’m glad your flight was canceled.”
“Me too.” It was a bonus day with him, and I planned to make the most of it.
His hand reached out, grabbing snow.
He was going to smash it in my face.
“Oh no you don’t!” I screeched, trying to pull away from him but he held on tight.
We wrestled in the snow until I was underneath him. He straddled my hips. He held the snow up as a threat.
“You wouldn’t.”
“I would.” His answering grin was boyish.
I pulled him down, his cold lips touching mine. “I’d rather do this than fight.”
“Me too.” We kissed for a while, the snow falling all around us.
Finally, he sat back on his heels. “We should head back. I don’t want you getting too cold.”
He stood, holding out a hand to me.
I took it brushing off the snow, the cold finally seeping in. I was warm when we were running and dodging each other.
We headed back to the lodge, hand in hand. Was it too much to wish we could do this again? That we could live in another house on the property, raising our children here, working together at the lodge? I sneaked a glance at him, wondering if he was thinking the same thing.
When we reached his condo, we pulled off our wet clothes, hanging them in his laundry room to dry.
“Want to go in the hot tub?” he asked.
“Of course. It’ll be my last opportunity.”
Henry turned away without responding. I grabbed an armload of large towels, placing them on the heater by the hot tub.
Stripping down right before I stepped in. I sank into the heat. “This is heaven.”
The hot tub, the snow, being alone. It was more than a reprieve from going back to reality, it was a chance to deepen our relationship, to show him how much I loved him. How much I wanted to stay despite the consequences.
He pulled me into his naked body, I linked my hands around his neck. “I love it here.”
“Me too.”
I cocked my head to the side. “This is the only place you’ve really ever lived.”
We’d talked about this before but something was nagging at me.
“Unless you count college.”
“Yeah, but that was still in Colorado.”
“I never wanted to live anywhere else.”
His confession was like a tiny needle prick to my heart. I didn’t want him to leave, but something about his steadfast belief that he never would, bothered me. Would he be that unyielding in every other aspect of his life? Would he fit me into his life as seamlessly as he had this last week?
“I can see your brain turning from here. Today, it’s just you and me. There’s no New York or Colorado. Just us. Nothing else penetrates.”
“I like that.”
He lowered his lips to mine. We kissed slowly with no destination in mind. I enjoyed being in his arms, his lips, and his touch. He lifted me to straddle him, my knees on either side of his hips, resting on the bench as he slowly lowered me onto his length. I threw my head back on the descent. His hands gripped my hips, pulling me up then back down. My tits bouncing in the cold air, he lowered his head, taking one in his mouth.
The combination of being naked outside, even on the privacy of his deck, sent me soaring higher and faster than any other time we’d been together. I moved faster, making it difficult for Henry to keep his mouth on my nipples. He pulled me flush against him, thrusting into me from below. When the orgasm barreled through me, I bit his shoulder lightly, soothing it with a kiss. I tightened my grip on him, never wanting to let go. Never wanting to leave this moment. After a while, Henry nudged me. “We should get out.”
“Yeah,” I agreed, moving to the side so he could step out first, grabbing the now-warm towel to wrap around his waist while he held one out to me. He wrapped me up, carrying me inside so I wouldn’t have to walk on the cold floor.
As we toweled off and got dressed, he asked, “What do you want for dinner?”
“We have leftovers from the wedding.”
“Let’s do that. Then we won’t have to cook.”
We headed down to the lodge’s kitchen, heating the food then eating it on the couch which had been moved back to the great room. Henry started a fire in the fireplace.
When we finished, we sat on the couch, knees pulled up between us, sipping on wine. “I’ve been wanting to ask you something and since you’re here and we’re all alone, I thought it would be a good time.”
Was he going to ask me to stay or to keep having a relationship once I left? “Okay.”
“The first night you were here, Elle mentioned something about a party in high school. It was nothing really. I probably wouldn’t have thought anything of it if it wasn’t for the look on your face, the one you’re getting right now.”
My heart pounded in my chest, roaring in my ears. My mouth suddenly dry, I took a sip of my wine, buying myself time. I’d never talked to anyone about that night and Elle had easily accepted my lie. “I said I wasn’t at the party, remember?”
“I think you were lying.”
I hissed out a breath. “Why do you think that?”
“I can tell. What happened?” His tone was gentle.
I tensed. He already knew I was lying. It wouldn’t do our relationship any good to keep up the pretense that nothing happened. If I wanted him to accept all of me, I needed to tell him. “I don’t talk about it.”
“Why not?”
“We all do stupid stuff when we’re teenagers. We learn from our mistakes and move on. No need to dwell on them.” That was something my parents would have said. We let you make your own decisions, make your own mistakes. You live with the consequences and learn.
But this one was always lurking in the back of my brain, a sharp reminder that being risky wasn’t a good idea.
“You are dwelling on it though.” His gaze was steady on mine.
We’d become closer the last couple of weeks, closer than anyone else in my life. I knew I wouldn’t be able to distract him or divert his attention to something else. He wouldn’
t be satisfied until I told him everything.
“I understand you don’t talk about it but you can trust me.”
I sighed, hoping he wouldn’t think less of me. The old shame crept in as I tried to remember what I was thinking that night. “I told you my parents let me do my own thing. That was a heady feeling for a teenager. I felt like I was invincible. I didn’t have anyone calling me to ask where I was or checking up on me. I could do whatever I wanted.”
I gathered my thoughts, a sick feeling forming in my stomach. “I went to the biggest party of the year. This kid always had wild parties because his parents weren’t home. Back then, I was drinking too much. I liked the numb feeling it gave me. I didn’t care about my parents or that I was so alone. I was the fun girl, the one people wanted to be with.”
He shifted on the couch to face me.
“This party was crazier than the others, a fight broke out between some upperclassmen, stuff was broken. I was hanging out by the pool when someone shouted that the police were there, run. All hell broke loose. Kids were screaming and running in every direction.”
He pulled me closer, wrapping an arm around my shoulder in silent support. “What did you do?”
“Adrenaline was pumping through me. A few kids were hopping the fence and running. It seemed like the safest option. I made it over but I landed wrong on my ankle. There was this intense shooting pain. I couldn’t get up, much less run. I called for help but no one stopped. Everyone was trying to save themselves.”
“They didn’t want to get caught.”
“I’m sure, but I felt left behind. Of course, the cops found me. I went to the hospital. My ankle was badly sprained, and I was charged with underage drinking.” The familiar shame filled me.
“If you had no prior record, I’m surprised the cops didn’t let you go after talking to your parents.”
“The cops tried to talk to my parents. They said it was out of their hands. I needed to learn a valuable lesson. They’re big believers in life experiences.”
“Yeah, but they didn’t give you any guidance to begin with.”