Unable to keep her gaze from Anna, Ollie just looked at her. She pretended to not know what Anna wanted.
Anna tilted her chin more and then pinched Ollie’s side, causing her to squeak. “Would you just kiss me, please?”
A laugh later, Ollie had pressed their lips together.
I feel like we’re the only ones in the world. She held Anna close, their shared body heat mingling between them. When headlights flashed outside and Anna’s phone bleeped with a text from the taxi company, they broke apart.
“Until Tuesday?” Ollie asked, feeling like it was a terribly long time until then.
“Yes. I’m glad we could arrange a time when we’re all free.”
“And then Thursday. Three times in seven days. I do feel special.”
“Oh, um, actually.” Anna sucked at her lip. “I can’t make it to the crochet group this week.”
“Oh,” Ollie replied, her voice small. She made an attempt at a brave face. “Okay.”
“Sorry,” Anna said, her gaze sliding sideways. “It’s not because I don’t want to come, it’s just…I have things to do.” She shrugged. “Christmas, you know.”
“Okay.”
Anna smiled and pulled Ollie down to her, before kissing her firmly on the lips. “But I’ll text you, and we’ll see each other on Tuesday.”
“You might have to save me from my children.” She let Anna go, waited for her to button her coat up and pull her hat down over her ears, and then opened the door for her.
“Text me when you get home.”
“Of course.” She stepped down from the side door and strode over to the taxi. Ollie watched her sit inside and wiggle her fingers in a little wave as it drove away.
Delightful tingles spread through her as she locked the door and went up into the flat to make herself a hot cocoa and a hot water bottle. Coffee on Tuesday is good. And I suppose her not being there means I can focus on the other members of the crochet group for once.
Ollie worried about the meeting with her children all of Sunday, all of Monday, and all day Tuesday. At five to four, Ollie locked up the shop and limped down the street, her coat and scarf pulled tightly around her. She was sweating, even though it was freezing cold.
Anna was already in the café when she arrived. Ollie went to her and kissed her hard on the lips, her insides fluttering. When they pulled back, Anna stroked her cheek. “It’s all right. I’m here too.”
“Any minute now,” Ollie said, her gaze trained on the door.
Kieran and Helen arrived on time and together.
“Hi, guys.” Kieran breezed through the door. Confidence shone from him as he held out his hand to shake Anna’s. “So nice to meet you, finally.”
Anna beamed at him and shook his hand warmly. Then she turned to Helen. “Hi. I’m Anna.”
The same hardness radiated from Helen that Ollie had been privy to when they’d met up a few weeks before.
“Hi.” Helen narrowed her eyes at Anna and moved around the table to sit before Anna could offer her a hand to shake.
Kieran patted Ollie on the back and sat too. Ollie tripped over her chair as she rounded it to go to the counter.
“Cake, kids?”
“No thanks, Mum.” Kieran gave her another smile.
Helen shook her head. “Just tea.”
Kieran winked at Ollie. Ollie leant heavily against the counter.
“Mum says you teach English,” Kieran said.
“That’s right.” To Ollie’s pleased surprise, Anna sounded tentative but confident.
“You like it?”
“Yes, I love it. Perhaps a bit too much sometimes.” It was meant as a joke, and Kieran laughed.
“So you’re a workaholic?” Helen asked.
“I used to be,” Anna said, her voice level. “Recently, though, I’ve relinquished some of my responsibilities.”
“You’re part-time now?” Kieran asked, his tone intrigued.
“Nope. Still do a full week. But I used to run book clubs at lunchtimes and after school. And I do that less now.”
Throughout their conversation about the clubs, Ollie noticed that Helen remained, on the whole, fairly quiet. She’s also not making nasty remarks, so I suppose that’s good.
The swirling sensations that had buzzed around her stomach since she’d arranged the meeting were beginning to calm. She slid into the chair next to Anna and they exchanged a smile.
“We’ve both given up a few things, haven’t we?” Anna said, moving her hand across Ollie’s thigh for a brief moment before she removed it.
Ollie nodded. “I’m thinking about only doing two swim lessons a week instead of five. And I’m looking into getting an assistant for the shop.”
“That’s great.” Kieran seemed genuinely pleased.
“Yeah,” Helen agreed, although there was a spark of derision in her eyes.
Ollie allowed her children to quiz Anna about her life. She supposed it was only natural. I’d be like that with anyone they brought to meet me. It struck her how grown-up they were becoming, bringing up topics like work and family. She’d had outdated expectations of them, talking about television and the latest music craze when they were children.
Their drinks arrived a moment later, and Helen actually drank her tea, although her attitude wasn’t much improved. Never mind. Perhaps she just needs more time.
Once Kieran and Anna had discussed things like the finer points of growing dahlias and various novels they had both read, Helen folded her arms. The whole of Ollie’s body tensed.
“You seem lovely,” Helen said to Anna, “but I’m sorry. I don’t like this. I don’t want you dating my mother.”
Ollie’s heart dropped. She closed her eyes briefly.
Keeping Helen’s gaze steadily, Anna nodded. “Is there anything specific you feel especially strongly about?”
Helen blinked as if she hadn’t expected Anna to be interested in why she felt the way she did. “Um. Yeah. The gay thing.”
“‘The gay thing’?” Anna asked gently. Ollie marvelled at how natural the word sounded on her tongue.
“Yeah. It’s gross. And unnatural.”
Kieran stared at his sister in disbelief. “Really?”
Helen nodded once. “Really. I disapprove.” Her knuckles were white as they gripped her forearms. “So, there you go. I don’t like it.”
“What’s it really about?” Anna asked. “From what I’ve heard about you, and Ollie does talk about you a lot, you haven’t been brought up as someone that would have an issue with it.”
Helen’s mouth opened and she seemed stuck, like a fish in glue.
“You’re not a homophobe,” Kieran said with a similar expression.
“I know I’m not.” Helen unwound her arms to poke at the handle on her teacup. “I just don’t want my mother dating a woman. It’s gross.”
Ollie sighed. So that was it. She’s being a stroppy teenager and going with her gut rather than thinking about it rationally. Fine. That I can deal with. She thought back to her time in classrooms in England before she was sent to various countries with the army and the fantastic but difficult kids she’d taught back then. She’d had her share of stroppy, malicious teens out for a fight.
“Helen, listen. I know you hate me, or at least what I did.” Ollie felt Anna’s hand back on her leg, but low down, next to her knee, a source of comfort she drew strength from. She took a deep breath. “Whomever I date—and I am allowed that privilege, you know—I’m a human being. Whomever I date, you won’t be happy. I’m…I’m g-gay, and that’s not going to change.”
Helen rolled her eyes and refolded her arms. She glanced behind her towards the door.
“Don’t even think about running off before I’ve finished.” Ollie leant her elbows against the table and focused solely on her. “You do not get to say your piec
e and then dash off before you hear what I have to say.”
“I’m your ride, anyway,” Kieran muttered.
“Helen, I’m not going to stay single and lonely just because you’re under some illusion that you have a say in what I do or who I spend time with. You’re my daughter. I take your views very seriously, but you’re still punishing me for something I can’t take back. And I won’t take your views seriously if they’re just irrational.”
Helen looked down at her hands.
“I like Anna, and I’m going to date her. How you feel about that doesn’t influence my choices.”
The gaze that drifted to the ceiling truly did remind Ollie of her old days teaching. “Fine. Whatever. Do what you want, Mum.”
She didn’t leave, though. She slowly lifted her cup and sipped her tea.
Anna’s hand squeezed Ollie’s leg. Her eyes held affection and encouragement.
They drank their teas, and eventually Kieran started up a conversation about plants again. My son the horticulturist. Who’d have thought?
He and Anna talked for another half an hour, and they all had another cup of tea. Helen stared into her drink moodily, and Ollie wondered whether she was looking for more arguments in the steam. But she didn’t talk again. She also didn’t leave until Kieran announced he needed to get back.
Helen stepped into Ollie’s arms and gave her a wooden hug. Ollie rested her cheek against Helen’s hair and said, “I’ll see you very soon.”
Thursday was odd. Ollie was so used to Anna’s presence at the crochet group that she was disappointed about the empty chair next to Matthew once everyone had arrived.
Sarah and Christian had come, dressed in their matching accessories. Matthew’s eyes were full of something Ollie identified as gentle understanding as he watched her move around the room. She made everyone a drink and fingered the mug with blue flowers on it. Anna’s mug. She put it back in the cupboard.
She’s phoning you later. Stop being a lovesick wimp. Ollie set her jaw. She forced herself to make the evening an enjoyable one for all in attendance. An extra bounce flooded her step. She couldn’t help but tease Sarah and Christian as they gazed lovingly at one another. She gave Matthew a hug when he told her that he and Harry had made it official. He was all smiles.
Good. He needs some stability and happiness in his life.
Now she had something she could relay to Anna later, a piece of gossip that would make her smile.
Ollie washed up the mugs after everyone had left, making sure to wear her washing-up gloves. Although, perhaps Anna would give me another massage if my hands became sore. She shook her head, her mouth tugging into another grin. Anna’s good books were a lovely place to be, as nice as a massage sounded. She ought to do what she was told. She blinked. This is very unlike me—what happened to the Ollie that ignored the order to run and stayed to protect her class from a raid?
She was just popping the last mug away when her phone rang. “Good evening,” she said, leaning back against the work surface.
“What’re you wearing?”
“My usual crochet-group attire.” Ollie shrugged. “You know, thigh-high PVC boots, my string vest.”
“Nothing else?” Anna was laughing.
“Nothing else.”
Anna’s laughter was infectious. “How was your day?”
“Okay, thanks, comrade. Yours?”
“Busy,” Anna sighed but sounded fulfilled and happy. “My hands are killing me.”
“Been writing end-of-term reports?” Ollie idly scuffed the toe of her boot against the carpet. “I remember those well from when I started teaching.”
“Nail on the head.”
“Working late, then?”
“You could say that.”
There was a pause. Ollie chewed her lip. “Want to hear some gossip?”
“Always.”
Ollie chuckled at the relief in Anna’s voice. “Matthew and Harry are together.”
“Finally.” Rustling on the other end of the phone made Ollie imagine Anna settling down. Anna’s breath echoed cavernously in the bowl of what Ollie was sure was her wine glass as she took a sip. “How did they manage that?”
“Matthew said you had a serious talk with him last week.”
“Ah, yes.”
Ollie chuckled. “What did you say to him? Must have been very persuasive.”
“I might have gone a bit ‘strict teacher’ on him, I’m afraid. Told him it was all okay and that just because he and Harry are different people doesn’t mean they won’t work as a couple.”
“I’ve been telling him that for ages.” Ollie’s mouth opened in mock dismay. “That boy never listens to me.”
“I obviously have some kind of charm that gay men fall for.”
Ollie laughed. “Not just gay men, you know.”
“No?”
A pause while they both hummed happily over that fact.
“I suppose Sarah and Christian were there tonight?” Anna asked.
“They were,” Ollie said. “Matching outfits and all.”
Anna made a gagging noise and Ollie laughed.
“Don’t take the mickey. Apparently we’re just as bad.”
“Who told you that?” Anna asked, sounding mock offended.
“Matthew.”
“We’d better get some truly sickening outfits, then. I’m thinking jogging suits in pink and blue.”
“Disgusting,” Ollie said. “However, I’m not sure I mind being disgusting with you.” There was a pause. She hoped she hadn’t said the wrong thing.
“In that case, we shall just have to be disgusting together.”
Ollie smiled and relaxed, moving over to the door. She turned out the lights before locking the side door and shuffling in the dark towards her stairs.
“How’s your knee today?” Anna’s voice made Ollie feel very comforted, without a single hint of irritation sparked by Anna’s concern.
She huffed, however, and leant heavily on the banister. A deep breath filled her lungs and the dusty smell of the staircase made her grimace. “I hate the winter,” she grumbled.
Anna made a tiny sympathetic noise. “I can imagine.” The care in her voice made Ollie’s irritation at her own inadequacies ease a bit.
“I’ll take some ibuprofen when I reach the top of my stairs.” Ollie groaned and gripped the banister as a particularly strong pain squeezed her knee. “Give me an hour.”
“Oh, love,” Anna said, and Ollie was hit by the word, the ominous four-letter word neither of them had spoken to one another yet. She tapped the banister with her fingers to rid herself of the anxiety that word evoked before she hauled her mangled body up the last step.
“I’ve reached the summit.”
That made Anna giggle, which made Ollie smile despite the pain. “To the medicine cabinet with you.”
“Yes, love,” Ollie replied, forcing herself to echo the word. Relax. It’s important to say it back.
“So your day was okay?”
Ollie filled a glass with water and popped two tablets into her hand. “Everyone’s winding down now for Christmas,” she said with a sigh.
“Pretty quiet, then?”
“Yep. Very boring.”
“Anything from your kids?”
“A couple of texts. Kieran thanked me for cups of tea and the chat. He seems to like you, so that’s something. Helen actually said we should meet up again after Christmas. She didn’t specify whether she meant you as well, though.”
“I don’t mind. Must be really confusing for her. Having her mother be with someone else, someone who isn’t her dad.”
“She’s had five years to get used to it.”
A hum vibrated in Ollie’s ear. “Found yourself an assistant yet?”
“I put an advert out in the local pap
er, I’ll have you know.”
“Really?”
“Yes.” She took a deep breath. “One day a week at first. Then perhaps stretching to two if I feel it’s working out. And the swimming lessons? I’ve made it official. I’ve asked the leisure centre to reduce my classes to two a week. Five is too many.”
“Good.”
“I must confess, though,” she said before swallowing the tablets with a gulp of water. “I feel quite uneasy about it. Having so much time on my hands. And relinquishing control of my shop to someone else. What if they do something I’m not happy with?”
“If you want any help interviewing,” Anna said, “I’m quite used to that.”
“Head of department?”
“Used to be. Gave the job to Jack when Timothy moved in. More important things, you know?”
“Senior management, hmm?” Ollie leant against her kitchen counter, her fingers at her chin. “I find that quite sexy.”
“Do you?”
“I expect you’ve told a lot of people off in your time. Adults, I mean.”
“I’ve done my fair share of supervision and appraisals.”
Ollie moved towards her sofa and snuggled her shoulders back into the cushions. “Me too, although not for a long while.”
“Try not to be too ‘army sergeant’ when you’re showing whoever the new person is the ropes.”
“Like I said, it’s been a long time since I’ve held any authority over anyone except myself.”
“Because…you know…” Anna’s voice had dropped in tone as well as volume. “If anyone gets to see that side of you…it should be me.”
That made Ollie start. “Unexpected.”
Anna laughed. She sounds nervous.
“Not unwelcome,” Ollie said.
An exhalation of air. “Okay.”
Warmth settled around her. “Anyway. What about you? All those book clubs you do? Why don’t you give some to…Jack, is it?”
“He is keen, I’ll admit. But I do love them. And I’m not sure I’d be able to explain what I do, to him.”
“He runs them too, doesn’t he?”
“Only a couple a week.”
“He’s qualified. I’m sure he’d be fine.”
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