by M. Raiya
I tipped my head forward in an instinctive owl sign of acknowledgment and caught myself, remembering I had words now. “Thank you. I just hope…. Well, there is a lot of ugly in my world, Coleen. I’ll do everything I can to keep Vin out of it.”
The “but” hung in silence.
“There is ugly in every world,” she said. “And if you’re truly feeling what it looks like you’re feeling when you look at each other, you won’t be able, or want, to keep your hearts separate.”
My mouth was hanging open. She smiled gently. My appreciation for her depth kept rising.
She gestured to the side of the house where I’d been attacked. “Vin told us last night you’ve heard nothing from your grandfather.”
“No. Nothing yet.”
“Jack wasn’t able to find anything on his name so far. But now we have this connection with your parents. Maybe I could talk to them, tell them that you’re here and safe, and then see what happens from there?”
I shook my head. “No, not yet. Because I’m shunned, I can’t risk any communication with them, even through you. But I appreciate it. You don’t know how much.”
“Oh, I do. I had a lot of trouble with my family when I was growing up, over money and who I was in love with.” She made a gesture to brush it off. “I’m awed that someone like you is becoming part of my family now.”
I cleared my throat, thinking how well she and my mother would probably get along. My mother had told me once that my grandfather hadn’t much liked my father at first. They had a lot in common, both with families who hadn’t liked the guy they’d chosen to love. “Thank you,” I said. “I really hope you can meet my parents someday, and not through their business.” I didn’t add that a lovely family dinner seemed so remote I couldn’t even picture it. But how wonderful it would be!
She changed the subject. “Are you nervous? About meeting all his friends?”
“Scared shitless.” Then I flushed a little.
She laughed. “Yup, you’re human. Just checking. Now, go shower and get changed. We’ll be leaving in an hour or so.”
It felt wonderful to be mothered again. Though very briefly, I did contemplate the benefits of a hollow tree.
“DO YOU have brothers and sisters?” Coleen asked me as soon as we got in the car. It seemed a little odd to ride in the back seat after sharing the front with Vin yesterday, but that was life.
“I’m an only child. I didn’t know their boat-building business had gotten so big. I was surprised to see London mentioned in that brochure. That happened since I left. I wonder if it had something to do with my disappearance. Maybe they explained it by going overseas and saying I was with them.”
“Vin said you were sixteen when all that stuff happened?”
“Yeah. Beginning of my sophomore year.”
“I’m sorry, but it’s so hard to believe your parents would just accept your grandfather’s decision like that.” Jack sent me a glance over the back of the seat.
“It’s our way,” I said quietly. “And my mother has always deferred to her father.” I wouldn’t speak ill of her, no matter what. “They’re very close. And Vin told you my father is mentally impaired?” I was having a little trouble remembering the details of the conversation between them that I’d overheard in the ICU.
“Yes,” Coleen said.
“Yeah. He builds great boats, but he’s not able to, well, manage day-to-day life things.” I swallowed hard, pulling my mind away, as I had so many times, from wondering what they told him had happened to me.
“I’m sorry,” Coleen said. “It must have been hard.”
“Well, I never knew him before the accident, so to me that was just the way he was. He built Sea Foam for me. We loved each other. That’s all that mattered.”
“Can I ask what happened to him?” Jack glanced at me again over his shoulder.
“Yeah,” I said. “It was a sailboat accident. A freak wind gust hit the boat and swung the boom into his head.” I figured they didn’t know much about sailing, so I added, “That’s the heavy pole that runs along the bottom of the main sail. He fell down the companionway—the stairs—onto the floor of the cabin, and hit his head again. By the time my grandfather got him back to shore, there was brain damage. He’s lucky he survived. My grandfather thought he was dead.” I controlled a shudder from just thinking about it. “I was born a few months later.”
“Your poor mother,” Coleen said with a sigh. “And then to lose you too…. It just makes no sense to me why your grandfather would do this to you, after all your family’s been through.”
“Clan first,” I said.
“You’re sure he knows you’re able to shift again?” Jack asked, keeping his eyes on the road this time.
“Oh yeah,” I said. “He knows everything before it happens. Usually because he’s the one who made it happen.”
“I really want to call your mother,” Coleen said. “I could say I’m calling about the stock wobble last week, and then mention that her son is in my back seat.”
“No!” I said very quickly. “Let’s get through today first.”
She shot me a look, but I adamantly shook my head. I wanted to keep them, and Vin, out of it. As much as I could anyway.
“Fair enough,” she said. “Well, we want you to know that you can stay with us as long as you want to.” Then she laughed. “You’re more helpful than Vin around the house.”
Part of me wanted to point out that they weren’t usually home enough to give him a chance, but I swallowed that impulse quickly. Maybe another good thing coming out of this situation was that Vin and his parents were communicating better now. At least my fiasco of a life had been the catalyst for something good.
A minute later we pulled into the school parking lot. The place was mobbed, and we just barely got a place to park in the far back. “Jean wants us to save them seats,” Coleen said, checking a text. “They have to park out on the road.
“Let’s go, then,” Jack said, hopping out.
We joined the crowd. This is it, I thought as I walked along the sidewalk I’d gazed at for so long from the pines. I was here, in human form, about to walk into the building. I glanced at the limb where I usually sat to wait for the school day to end. Never again. I would never have to wait. Never have to watch Vin ride away from me. I had my choices back.
Except… my grandfather….
If Vin was right and the elan had been a lie, how much else about my grandfather wasn’t true either? A sudden chill ran through me. If my grandfather had gone to this extreme to get me out of the way, had he done the same to my father? What if it hadn’t been a freak wind gust? The two of them had been alone on the boat…. He’d thought my father was dead. Just as he thought I would die? That was a horrible, chilling thought. Why would he have wanted my father dead? I knew that my mother had once said that he hadn’t exactly been thrilled when she and my father had started to date, but…. He had a reason for wanting me out of the way—my magic, and hence my right to rule the clan after him. But my father hadn’t had magic.
One thing suddenly became clear. I no longer trusted my grandfather. Not just for myself, but for the rest of my clan. My family. If I was the only one who suspected that the basis of his iron rule over us—elans—was a lie, and that he had sent a great horned owl after me, then I needed to tell the others. And then what? I doubted they would accept him as their leader any longer. That meant… I shivered.
Unless another shifter had been born with magic after I left, there was only one choice for the next leader. I didn’t want that kind of responsibility, at least, not yet. And how ironic that my grandfather’s actions to prevent me from ever challenging him were what might drive me to challenge him. If Vin hadn’t woken me up to what was going on…. Yet I had no proof. And the great horned owl might attack me again at any moment to be sure I didn’t find any.
“You okay?” Coleen asked.
“Yeah, fine,” I said and found a smile. “Just feels really st
range to be here.”
“I bet,” she said with a sympathetic smile.
I hesitated as we approached the front doors. They were just a row of three glass doors, looking perfectly normal. As I followed Coleen and Jack through one, I felt a burst of freedom. Despite everything I still faced, this was the moment when I knew beyond a doubt that I had survived three years of banishment. But I hadn’t expected the weight of responsibility that went along with it settling down over me at the same time.
We funneled through the doors, across a hall, and into the gym. Its cavernous space was already packed with people in neat rows on plastic chairs and on the bleachers climbing almost to the ceiling. Voices filled the space with talking and laughing and excitement. We found seats on the aisle about halfway back from the flower-draped platform. Coleen took the place on the aisle and got her camera ready. Jack sat next to her, and I beside him. I put the raincoat Coleen gave me across three chairs next to me for their friends. Just as when I’d been in the mall, it felt wonderful to be surrounded by people. No matter what else was going on, I was going to enjoy being here.
Most people took high school graduations for granted. What had my teachers thought when I suddenly vanished?
“Wow, parking was a bitch out there.” A woman had stopped in the aisle next to Coleen. She was tall, blond, and had an expression that she was too good to sit on cheap plastic folding chairs. Next to her was a man who had much the same expression, and a young man about my age who was busy gazing up and down the aisles. “Thanks for saving us seats. Can’t believe little Vinny is all grown up.”
We rose to let the newcomers in, and I pulled Coleen’s coat off the chairs. They edged past me and sat. They looked like members of the Thatcher’s financial world—immaculately dressed and poised.
“I know, it’s crazy,” Coleen said. “Mary, Adam, Anton, this is Gabriel Lane, a friend of Vin’s who’s staying with us for a while.”
“Hi—” I started to say, then froze.
The young man dropped into the seat next me. He was as blond as his parents, tanned, muscled, and styled down to his perfect eyebrows. And familiar. It only took me a second to place him. Oh bloody hell. Anton of the sleek black motorboat. Vin had told me their parents were friends and their fathers worked together. Anton, who had drugged Vin and made him watch while he—oh God.
“Well, hello,” Anton said, holding out his hand to me. I had no choice but to shake it. He held me in his powerful grip just a little bit too long. “Do you have wings, Mr. Gabriel Lane?”
I sensed Coleen and Jack go tense. For a moment I blanked on why he would possibly ask me such a thing, but then it clicked.
“Not at the moment,” I said honestly. “I don’t have my halo with me either.” I wiped my hand on my pants leg as everyone laughed.
“Nice to meet you,” Mary said, eyes full of curiosity.
None of us offered any more information.
“Are you a student?” she finally asked. “Anton graduated three years ago. I still can’t believe it.”
“I’m a sophomore,” I said automatically. Then added, “But not from here. I knew Vin from before he moved.” And realized I had no idea where exactly Vin had moved here from. Was it New York City? Clearly, we hadn’t thought this through very well.
“Damn, they don’t make sophomores like this in Vermont,” Anton said, laughing.
“Anton, stop it.” Adam cuffed his son lightly on the leg. “Forgive him,” he said to me. “Anton goes to college in California. They say anything out there.”
“How are your classes going, Anton?” Coleen asked.
“Very well, thanks. Hollywood, is, as they say, interested.” His eyes were all on me on the last word. His pupils were dilating in a way I didn’t like at all.
“He’s majoring in acting, but he’s also taking a lot of classes in scriptwriting,” Adam said.
“One of his scripts has been chosen for an independent film,” Mary said.
“Very nice,” Jack said, nodding.
“Thank you,” Anton said. “I’m here for the summer, just lazing around on my boat. After the year I had, I need a break. Thought I’d come back to Vermont and check out the scenery. Must say I like what I see so far.” His pupils were so big someone could fall into them.
I folded my arms across my chest. “I hear we’re in for a very cold summer.”
“Are you kidding? Let me show you a photo of my boat. It’ll warm anything up.” He dug his phone out of his pocket.
I had no desire to see his boat a second time, but he thrust his phone in my face a moment later. The black vessel on the screen looked just as noisy as it had been in real life.
“What do you think?”
“I’m a sailor,” I said. “Not my thing.”
“Anton, stop!” his mother hissed in his ear.
He laughed and leaned back in his chair. I decided my initial impression was correct—Anton was a rich, spoiled bastard who tried to pick up anyone that might want to bask in his glory. But he was dangerous too. I wondered again what drug he’d given Vin.
A man dropped into an empty seat in front of us, which had been saved by a tall, dark woman wearing a white dress with music notes all over it. The man was fit, in his thirties, and there was something familiar about his profile—I got it as he turned in his seat to face our row. It was the older man who’d made me nervous. The one who had offered Vin the music job.
“Coleen and Jack Thatcher, right?” he asked. “I’m Bill Allard.”
“Hi?” Coleen said politely, and Jack nodded without recognition. I started to get a sinking feeling in my stomach instantly.
“The director of the Right Tones?” the man said, as though he expected them to understand. “The music group Vin’s joined?”
Jack and Coleen looked blank.
I swore silently. This was too much for one day.
Bill raised his eyebrows, looking really confused. The woman in the music dress turned around too. She looked hot and tired and like sitting here was the last thing she wanted to do. Yeah, mother of twins, I thought.
“Oh, Mrs. Allard,” Coleen said smoothly, “I didn’t recognize you. How are the babies?”
“They’re getting more rest than I am,” she said with a laugh. “Thank you for asking. This is my husband, Bill. We were so excited when Vin accepted Bill’s offer to perform next year. We’ve got an incredible lineup. Carnegie Hall is reviewing our tape right now.”
“Carnegie Hall?” Jack was still blank.
“Yes, isn’t that thrilling?” Bill said. “We were honestly surprised when Vin accepted because we thought he was going to be off somewhere doing law school prep in college. We start touring this summer, then record a CD in the fall, and then we’ll be doing a winter tour, and—”
“CD? Tour?” Jack was getting red.
“What are you talking about?” Coleen asked.
“Oh dear.” Mrs. Allard looked at her husband, who looked back and forth between Jack and Coleen.
“He didn’t tell you.”
“We’ve had a lot going on,” Jack said. He sent a burning glance at me. “Did you know about this?”
And the honeymoon ends. “Ah, yeah,” I said and was saved by the opening strains of “Pomp and Circumstance,” struck up by the school band. Everyone rose and turned eagerly toward the door behind us.
“Well, we’ll fill you in as soon as we get a second,” Bill said. He didn’t look intimidated by Jack’s frown.
Jack sent me a last, long look, and I made myself smile as innocently as I could. Then he turned his back on me. I felt a headache start to build behind my eyes.
Anton eased closer to my other side. And to think I could shift and just fly away, I thought grimly.
The line of blue and green clad graduates marched in a double row past us. I craned and strained, and then I saw him. Vin was toward the middle of the pack, glowing with his beautiful Vin light.
An overwhelming urge to be marching next to him
swept me. I hadn’t thought it would hurt so badly. None of these kids had a clue how much they should appreciate the honor being bestowed upon them. I suddenly felt hugely inferior to everyone around me. Expert mouse catcher wouldn’t look great on a résumé. Then I firmly told myself to get a grip. Assuming I stayed human, I could take some online courses and get a GED without a lot of trouble. Academics had never been hard for me. And that was the least of my problems right now.
Vin wasn’t with anyone in his normal crowd. He was walking with the girl he gave high fives to every afternoon. She was grinning from ear to ear and waving to the crowd, and Vin touched her shoulder every little bit to remind her to keep walking while she waved. He was laughing too, caught up in the happiness she radiated, and clearly pleased to be her walking partner.
My heart swelled as they approached our row. Coleen shot off a quick burst of photos as he saw us. Our eyes locked. I felt electricity, the connection was so intense. In that instant I knew he understood how much being here meant to me. And I knew how much it meant to him that I was there.
Then Vin saw Anton next to me, and his face froze. Then he saw the Allards in front of us, and his face went pure white.
His gaze touched his father’s. I had no idea what Jack’s expression was, but I could imagine from the brave smile Vin managed to drag up from somewhere deep inside.
Then Vin looked back at me. Instantly I felt bathed in warmth. None of the other stuff really mattered. The future was Vin’s and mine, and what we made of it was ours to decide. I gave a quick nod to let him know it was all okay, and then he and the beaming girl beside him were moving on down the aisle.
Jack slowly turned to me, his face taut with tension.
“That was Penelope,” Coleen said quickly before Jack could say anything. “She and Vin have been buddies since he moved here. No way could he walk down the aisle with anybody else but her.”
“She looks like a lovely young lady,” I said, watching her cap bobbing along beside him as they filed into a row of chairs in front and I lost sight of them.