by Harley Wylde
“When I lost my apartment, you brought me here. Renegade lost his shit and pitched a fit. The next morning you said they’d called Church, but… we were caught together, in the shower.” My cheeks warmed in remembrance. “Scratch said congratulations, you’d just claimed me. So you see, being with me wasn’t your choice. You didn’t love me. You just got stuck with me. What I said earlier… I thought it was what you needed to hear. You may have felt guilty or something, but it wasn’t love.”
Ashes kept stroking my leg, but he was silent. He slid his hand up my hip and across my belly, banding his arm across me and holding me tight. With a slight shift, I felt his hard cock press against me and I gasped, my eyes going wide. He still wanted me? Not that he hadn’t been hard that first time when we’d been caught. Just because he wanted to fuck me didn’t mean anything.
“When I said I loved you, that nothing would change that…”
He left the words hanging and I tried to brace myself. Was he about to ask me to leave? Or at least move out his room?
“I meant it, Nikki. You’re mine. Maybe we didn’t end up together in some fairy-tale sort of way, but the woman I’ve come to know the last few months completely owns my heart. I hate that you’ve carried that with you all this time, worrying for no reason. Would it have changed things in the very beginning? Maybe. I can’t say for sure.”
“You’re not mad?” I asked.
“No, baby. I’m not mad.” He hugged me to him, resting his chin on my shoulder. “But just so you know, I still think it was hot as fuck that you knocked that slut on her ass tonight. You’re welcome to do that anytime you want, as long as you plan on getting naked when we get home.”
I giggled like some high school kid, but I couldn’t help it. I’d been so damn worried, so scared, and it was all for nothing. Ashes slid his hand up my abdomen until he cupped my breast, tweaking my nipple between his fingers. I moaned and my eyes slid shut. I rubbed my thighs together as an ache started between my legs. He played with my breasts and nipples, teasing me.
My breath caught and held as he moved his hand down my body, not stopping until his palm cupped my pussy. I lifted my hips, silently begging him for more. I needed to come. It had been so long, too long!
“Please, Archer.”
“Please, what?”
“I need you. Need… need…”
He swiped his finger over my clit and I cried out as sparks of pleasure shot along my nerve endings. “Need that?” he asked.
I nodded and whimpered as he lightly stroked the little bud. I came so fast it was almost embarrassing, but he seemed to love the effect he had on me. Before I realized what was happening, he’d stood with me in his arms. Water poured off us all over the floor, but he didn’t seem to care. Ashes strode over to the bathroom counter, setting me down on the space to the left of the sink. He pulled my ass to the edge, then dropped to his knees.
My breath caught at the first swipe of his tongue, and then I stopped thinking and focused on feeling. Every stroke against my clit made my thighs tremble and my heart race. Ashes made me come twice before he stood and gripped my hips. He blinked a few times, then his gaze held mine.
“Condoms. I don’t think I have any.”
I bit my lip and looked around. I didn’t really want to risk getting pregnant again right away, but I didn’t want to wait either. I pulled open the drawers I could reach, but none of them produced a condom.
“I can run to the store and grab a box,” he said.
“Or… you could see if the clubhouse has one? Or get one from someone there?” I suggested, not wanting to wait long enough for him to go shopping.
He snapped his fingers. “Prospects! I’ll call a Prospect and tell him to bring some.”
My cheeks warmed at the thought of the Prospects knowing we were having sex tonight. I still gave him a nod. It was better than the alternative. Ashes left and I heard him speaking to someone, then heard him walk out of the bedroom. Was I supposed to just… stay? Like this? I closed my legs and tried to ignore the chill in the air.
I didn’t know how much time had passed, but I didn’t think it was more than a few minutes. Ashes came back, a strip of three condoms hanging from his fingers and a smile on his face. I didn’t want to know who had brought them or I might never be able to hold eye contact with them again. He ripped one off the strip, tore it open, and rolled it down his cock.
“Come on, pretty girl. We’re moving this to the bedroom.”
He scooped me off the counter and carried me to our bed, the other condoms still gripped in his hand. He tossed them onto the nightstand before easing me down onto the mattress. The weight of his body pressed against me.
Ashes braced himself on his hands, his gaze locked with mine. My clit throbbed and my nipples ached. I needed him, wanted him. No one had ever made me feel the way Ashes did. The heat of his gaze burned into me as he shifted his hips and slowly sank into me. I moaned as he stretched and filled me, withdrawing only to push in again. I gripped his biceps, my nails digging into him.
“Archer, please…”
He growled and thrust harder. “I fucking love hearing you say my name when I’m balls-deep in your pussy.”
His filthy words made my breath catch as desire pulsed in my veins.
I whimpered and arched, lifting my hips.
“My dirty girl liked that,” he said with humor lacing his voice. He leaned down until his lips were near my ear. “Do you want me to fuck you hard and deep? Want me to pound this pussy so that you feel me for days?”
I never thought I could come just from words, but with his cock filling me and his mouth telling me filthy things, I came so hard I saw stars. “Archer!”
He growled and slammed into me over and over until I felt the hot spurts of his release as it filled the condom. As he stilled, his cock twitched and jerked inside me. He panted for breath and when he his gaze locked on mine, I knew that this was going to be the first of many times tonight. I wasn’t the only one who had missed the intimacy between us, and now that my fear wasn’t hanging over my head, I was going to enjoy every second of being in his bed. I only hoped we didn’t run out of condoms! I didn’t think three would be anywhere near enough.
Chapter Eight
Ashes
Cinder had called Church early this morning, but I was only half-listening. After an amazing night with Nikki, my mind was otherwise occupied. And not just because one of the condoms had broken. Nik had freaked out a bit, but even as exhausting as Oliver could be, I’d be thrilled if we had another kid. I could understand her wanting to wait a year or two, but sometimes fate had other ideas.
Halloween was our first holiday together as a family, but Thanksgiving and Christmas were coming soon. Even though Oliver was too small for it to have an impact on him, I wanted those days to be special for Nikki. More than that, I didn’t like that she was mine only in the eyes of my brothers. Even if she did wear my name across her back when she left the house, I knew that wouldn’t deter every guy out there. Some were just out and out assholes, but even a wedding ring wouldn’t keep those away. I’d been toying with the idea of asking her to marry me, but that was more for me than her in all honesty. I wanted her to have my last name, and the same for Oliver. I wanted her to legally be mine.
“Ashes, are you even listening?” Scratch asked, jerking my attention to the head of the table. Cinder was glaring my way, looking beyond pissed off. Shit.
“Sorry. I just…” I didn’t really have an excuse. Being preoccupied with thoughts of Nikki wasn’t going to fly as a reason to not pay attention.
Cinder pinched the bridge of his nose. Scratch leaned back in his chair, arms folded, and Havoc just stared me down. The only officers not making me wish I could sink through the floor, wouldn’t look at me at all. Great. I wondered if I could blame my memory loss for this one. No, I couldn’t. I wasn’t a pansy who couldn’t own up to his shit. “I was thinking about Nikki. I want to ask her to marry me,” I said.
“While I’
m sure that seems like the most important thing in the world, can you possibly focus on the business at hand for now?” Scratch asked. “You fuck up, and someone can get killed. Maybe even you. This room isn’t the place for daydreaming.”
I knew that. I wasn’t an idiot, even if my memory was a giant black hole. I felt the burn as a blush climbed my neck, and I hoped like hell my face wasn’t on fire too. Nothing like being chastised like a little kid at a table full of badass bikers. “Sorry, VP. Won’t happen again.”
No one at the table looked like they believed me. Renegade snorted and shook his head. “She wears a size six ring and she hates diamonds,” he said. “Best jeweler is over on Main Street. Now focus, dipshit.”
I gave him a one-finger salute, but I committed that information to memory before turning my gaze back to Cinder. He looked tired. No, more than that… it was like a heavy weight was pressing down on him. I hadn’t noticed it yesterday. Had something new happened? Or was there something he’d been holding onto, something we needed to know but he’d been reluctant to tell us?
“As I was saying…” Cinder stared at me a moment before shifting his focus. “We tracked down the men responsible for what happened to Ashes.”
A cough at the end of the table made Havoc place his hand over his mouth to hide the smirk that graced his lips. I wasn’t sure if he was amused over me being a sap for my woman, or because I got scolded like a kid.
“All right. Shade discovered who they are, with some help from Wire and Lavender. After some digging, it seems we weren’t the only club hit that month. While the Dixie Reapers weren’t involved, the Reckless Kings had something similar happen, as did Devil’s Fury and a few other clubs spanning from Missouri to Louisiana, and from the Carolinas to Arkansas. Ashes is just the only one who has memory loss from the situation. Everyone else was knocked out, but came to without anything more than a headache.”
“We’re taking the assholes down, right?” asked Shadow.
“We are, but we’re not doing it alone. Ashes, I’m giving you the option of going. The men responsible aren’t in the area anymore. They’re closer to the Reckless Kings up in Tennessee. I’m going to send three men, and Devil’s Fury is sending a few as well.”
I chewed the inside of my cheek. On the one hand, I’d love to get my hands on whoever fucked me up that day. But on the other… it would mean time away from Nikki and Oliver. Getting revenge wouldn’t change anything. My memories wouldn’t come back just because I beat on the assholes who did this to me. And honestly, I wasn’t entirely sure I wanted them back.
Nik and Oliver were my life. But so was this club. I owed them a lot, especially the Pres, and the last thing I wanted to do was let them down. If Cinder thought I should go, then that’s what I’d do. I drummed my fingers on the table. Ripper and Magnus volunteered to go, and I felt Cinder’s gaze on me. I met and held it a moment before giving him a nod. I only hoped this didn’t come back to bite me on the ass.
“The three of you will need to leave in the morning. You have about a six-hour ride. I’d tell you fuckers not to speed, but I won’t waste my breath. Just don’t get your asses pulled over between here and there. I’d just as soon no one realized we’re in the Reckless Kings’ territory if this goes to shit,” Cinder said.
“You said Devil’s Fury was heading that way too. Are we just meeting there, or are we stopping along the way to ride with them?” I asked.
“As far as I know, they’re leaving tonight. I believe Grizzly planned for his guys to be there before midnight,” Cinder said.
“So we’re going to be late to the party?” asked Ripper.
Cinder shrugged a shoulder.
“Fuck that. I say we leave tonight.” Magnus looked my way. “I know you have a kid now, but the sooner we get this shit settled…”
He didn’t even have to finish. I knew he was right. I gave a nod and only half-listened when the discussion changed to other business. I hoped Nikki would be understanding. It wasn’t like she’d never been around bikers before. She knew how things worked in the club. Then again, the last time I went on a run, I ended up beat to hell and lost every bit of my life up to the moment I came to in the damn warehouse. If she seemed apprehensive when I told her I was leaving, then it was understandable.
Nik didn’t seem like the type to cause a scene, unless club sluts were involved. I smiled a little, remembering the way she handled that woman. Still made me hot. Cinder banged the gavel and I stood, heading for the door. Before anyone had a chance to stop me, I went out and got on my bike. I roared through the compound, flying down the road. My tires spit gravel as I pulled into the driveway. I’d barely cut the engine before Nikki stepped outside.
“What’s wrong?” She worried at her lower lip.
“Why would something be wrong?” I moved closer to her, but stopped a few feet away.
“You came tearing into the driveway like hellhounds were chasing you. Pardon me if I thought I should be concerned.” She placed her hands on her hips, narrowing her eyes. At least she wasn’t worried anymore. Well, not at the moment.
“Maybe I just wanted to see you.”
Nikki pursed her lips and gave me the look that clearly said she thought I was full of shit. I was going to miss the hell out of her while I was gone. I could only hope it wouldn’t take long to wrap shit up and get back to my woman and kid.
“Anything I need to know?” she asked, relaxing her stance and holding out a hand to me.
I grasped it, then pulled her into my arms. I just held her a moment, breathing in her scent. Holding her was fast becoming my favorite pastime. Well, maybe second favorite. Last night I’d tried to make up for lost time, but I still craved her. Even now, I was at least semi-hard. “I have to leave for a little while.”
Nikki tensed and tried to pull away, but I wouldn’t let her.
“Just listen, baby. The men who hurt me are up in Reckless Kings’ territory. They fucked over a few clubs besides Devil’s Boneyard. We’re meeting Devil’s Fury up there, and for all I know, other clubs might show up too. Cinder said this shit happened across multiple states, and he discovered who was involved. I need to go handle business, then I’ll come back to you and Oliver.”
She fisted my shirt and buried her face against me. “You damn well better. Don’t you fucking leave me, Ashes.”
“Nik, you know I can’t control fate. I’ll die when it’s my time, but until then, I’ll do my damnedest to come home to you each and every time I leave the house. It’s the best I can do.”
She sighed and hugged me. “I know. I’m being a whiny bitch, aren’t I? I’m supposed to be some tough ol’ lady, and I feel like a marshmallow.”
I laughed softly. “No. Not a bitch. And maybe I like that you’re not some hard ass ol’ lady. Besides, Meg isn’t all that tough, but she belongs to the Pres. Maybe we need a little softness in our lives.”
Nikki pulled away, a slight smile on her lips. “Not a bitch but maybe a little whiny?”
Yeah, I wasn’t falling into that trap. Instead, I kissed the hell out of her.
“I need to pack.” I caressed her cheek. “Going to miss you, Nik. Both of you.”
“Love you so damn much.”
“Love you too.”
I kissed her again, then headed inside to visit with Oliver before I had to go. Cuddling him close, I wished I didn’t have to leave. I might have told Nik that I’d die when it was my time, but what if that time was now? What if I left and never saw my son grow up? My chest felt tight as I paced the room with Oliver. This kid was making me soft, both him and his mom. I might not remember my life before the incident, but I doubted I’d patched into the club by being a pansy.
There was a knock at the door and I heard Nikki answer it. Seeing Cinder took me a little by surprise. “Pres, everything okay?” I asked.
He watched Oliver a moment before his gaze met mine. “Hard to leave them, isn’t it?”
I looked down at Oliver and kissed his forehead. �
��Yeah, but I’m going. The club needs me.”
Cinder moved farther into the room and sat on the couch. He stretched out his legs and crossed his ankles, arms folded over his chest. To anyone else, he’d appear relaxed, but I could see the coiled tension in him. I didn’t know why he was here. I’d said I would go to Tennessee. Had he not wanted me to volunteer? Maybe I’d read everything all wrong in Church.
“Before I claimed Meg, I was always willing to put myself at the front of the line when we faced down trouble. Then we had a kid and my life changed even more. This club is still my life, but I have something else to live for since gaining a family. Same goes for you, Ashes. I offered you the chance to go in case it’s what you really wanted. You’re the only one who saw the men you were meeting, but since your memory is gone, there’s no guarantee you’d recognize them. Hell, for all we know, you never set eyes on them.”
I sat in my chair with Oliver. “What are you getting at?”
Cinder glanced around the room before focusing on me again. “You’ve made a nice life for yourself since you claimed Nikki. But you were distracted as shit today. As much as I’d like you to go to the Reckless Kings, I need to know you’ll be focused. I don’t need you getting yourself killed, or someone else, because you can’t keep your mind off your woman and kid.”
I understood where he was coming from, and I could appreciate his concern not just for me but for everyone handling this issue. I wanted to assure him that my head was in the game, but honestly, I didn’t know if it was. Maybe I was getting soft, or maybe things with Nik just felt too new. Missing most of my life made it feel like I’d only known her a few months. And Oliver… he was still so tiny, so young.
“If you’re not at the front gate ready to go within the hour, I’ll tell the others to leave without you.” Cinder rose. “And I won’t think any less of you if you decide to stay behind.”
“I want to pull my weight around here, Pres. I know I’m letting everyone down, but I just…” I shook my head, not knowing how to explain it. There were times I didn’t feel like myself, like I wasn’t reacting to things the way I would have before. The problem was that I had no idea who I’d been before I lost my memories.